Heartbeats
by GirlinTheCafe
Summary: The aftermath of 3.16/3.17, it’s after Keith’s funeral, Lucas is scared and confused. He feels like the world is crashing down on him, after a walk he ends up by Peyton. Will his feelings come out and how will Peyton react?
1. One Night to Be Confused

One Night To Be Confused

His head was full, full with stuff. Memories, sadness, thoughts. Lucas was walking through the streets of Tree Hill. There was no destiny on his way. Where he would end up, he didn't know. He didn't care.

His mind and body worked separated. His mind was full with memories, memories from his uncle Keith. Lucas cried inside, his heart was bleeding, while his legs carried him around.

Suddenly his legs stopped walking. Lucas looked up from the road for the first time this evening. He was looking at the front door of Peyton's house. He didn't move, didn't think. He just stood there, staring at the house. In the house there was darkness. Lucas took a deep breath. And he entered her house, knowing she was there. The door was unlocked, like always.

While Lucas was walking around in her house, Peyton lay in her bed. She tried to sleep, but she couldn't. She was tired, but she just couldn't sleep. Memories of the last couple of days were in her mind, they held her awake. Her pillow was wet, wet from her tears. Maybe if she cried long enough, she would fall asleep, she thought. But that was not the only reason why she was crying. She cried for so much more. Because the pain in her leg was almost unbearable, because Keith Scott wasn't anymore, because her life was messed up in every way, because she suddenly missed everyone and the most because she didn't know how to act when Lucas Scott was near.

With her closed eyes, she lay on her bed. Slowly she felt herself slip away in the world of dreams. Suddenly she heard a voice. "Hi Peyton." She opened her eyes, in her doorway stood Lucas Scott. First she felt a shower of cold feelings, but when she looked into his deep blue eyes, she felt the heat of her body warming up again. "Bad timing?" He asked. "No." She whispered. "Are you sure, it looked to me that you were sleeping." His face was worried. "No, I was just pretending." He laughed, his voice sounded so good as he laughed. He walked into her room. "May I?" He looked to the bed. Peyton began to lose control. That Lucas was here, talking to her, just like he normally would do. But this isn't normal, not after what happened. How could he just walk in her and pretend that nothing was happened. "Peyton?" Lucas looked worried. "Oh yeah, sure." She answered quickly. He smiled softly. Beautiful girl, Lucas smiled, just thinking of that.

"What brings you here? It's late." Lucas was sitting on her bed. First there was silence, but then he finally began to speak. His voice broken. "I just can't take it anymore. It's too much. I just needed to get out of that place." A single tear rolled off his cheek. Peyton touched his hand gently. He looked up, his eyes full with tears. "Hey, Lucas, it's okay." She looked him, into his beautiful blue eyes, eyes full with tears. "No, it's not okay Peyton!" He yelled. "It's not!" He started to cry. Peyton was speechless. Lucas Scott was crying! Her hero, the strongest boy in her life, he was crying. His world was collapsed, by the death of one person. Keith Scott!

She wanted to hug him, but she couldn't move because of her hurt leg. "Luke …" Peyton fingers touched Lucas hand. "Luke, what's wrong, has something happen?" His face turned from confused to anger. "Keith died Peyton!" He yelled, his eyes turned black. "He died, and now my mom hates me! I took her love away, she is never going to forgive me for that! Years she had waited for love, she was going to marry him Peyton! And now he's dead! Because he came after me! It's my fault!" She wanted to say something, but he didn't give her a chance. "And Brooke, she doesn't understand me! And the whole world is feeling sorry for Jimmy! But not for my uncle! No not for Keith. They are not feeling sorry for my … father!" Tears were in his eyes, but he refused to cry. "Sshh" Peyton softly whispered. She moved her body a little, trying to get to his side. She tried to stifle her groans.

Lucas heard her suffer. "Peyton? Are you okay?" In a few seconds Lucas changed complete. From a broken guy who cried, he sudden was a worried and protective boy. "Peyton?" With a worried face, he looked at her, seeing her face in a painful grimace. "It's okay. It's just my leg." She whispered in pain. Tears stood in her eyes. "Are you sure, you don't look okay." His hand brushed against her cheek. Peyton was amazed by his touch. "You should rest."

Peyton closed her eyes and lay down. Lucas lay next to her. She between the sheets and he above them. Twenty minutes later, Peyton opened her eyes again. She found Lucas staring at her.

"Hi sleepy." He whispered softly. "Hi." Peyton whispered. Lucas pressed a sweet kiss on her forehead. "How's your leg?" His blue eyes still looked worried. "Its fine I guess." The silence came back.

"Can I see the injury?" Peyton was surprised when Lucas asked. "O-okay." She answered. She wanted to lift up the sheets, but then she realized she was only wearing a shirt and underwear. Lucas saw her hesitation. "Are you sure you're fine with it?" "Yeah, it's all right but …" Her voice faded away. "What Peyton?" He expected an awful answer, he held his breath. "I'm not very stylish at the moment, if you know what I mean." She smiled shyly. Lucas let his breath escape. "Ah, okay. Wait, I'll get you pants, or a skirt or something." Lucas stood up and grabbed a pair of green shorts and laid it on the bed. "I'll go outside, so you can have your privacy, call me when you're ready." He walked out the door. "Lucas, it's okay. It will take forever to get them on." He smiled. "And by the way, I just can't get dressed. If I want to, somebody's got to help me." Lucas looked at her, eyes full warmth.

Slowly Peyton took away the sheets. She still was uncomfortable, Lucas had seen her in other ways before, but still, it was weird. Lucas took Peyton's hand and squeezed it gently, letting her know she was brave. The white bandage appeared. Peyton took it off. The wound appeared. First Lucas looked at it. "Does it hurt that much, because it looks like it does?" He asked worried, it was a horrible wound. Peyton shook her head. "It's okay, for things like this, they have painkillers." She smiled sweetly. "But I guess you didn't take one today." She nodded. "I forgot." Lucas eyes looked worried. "Forgot? Peyton? You're suffering, you need to take them!" Peyton felt guilty, she didn't want to make Lucas angry or worried about her. He saved her life, and he has gone through a lot lately. "I know, but I just wanted to know if I'm strong enough to do without. Luke, I don't want to feel weak anymore, this is not going to get me, like everything else did." Lucas pulled her in a hug. "It's okay Peyton, it's all okay now."

Moments of silence. Lucas and Peyton lay both down on her bed. Peyton with her eyes closed, Lucas just lay besides her, watching her. And suddenly, out of the blue, Lucas lips kissed Peyton leg. The spot next to the shot wound. She screamed, the pain in her leg was too strong to hold in silence. Lucas stifled Peyton's scream by pressing his lips on hers. His hands were everywhere, they slowly and softly disappeared under her shirt. "Lucas." She whispered. Lucas kissed Peyton's shoulder. Her hands grabbed his shoulders, so he needed to look Peyton in the eyes. "Lucas, you're confused, you're hurt. But you need to let Brooke in, she deserves it." Lucas shook his head. "No Peyton." He couldn't hear the name Brooke right now. "Peyton, she won't understand. She can't understand. She will never understand." Tears were in his eyes. "She don't know how it feels, losing someone. You know it Peyton. You lost your mom, you lost Ellie. You understand how it feels, the pain. The damn pain!" Peyton held Lucas' head between her hands. "Lucas." She whispered. "You don't deserve this, Lucas. I'm feeling so sorry for you." Her hand brushed through his hair. "But you're confused. Go home, go to sleep Luke." Lucas' face was upset. An angry tone reflecting in his voice.

"Didn't you mean anything from what you said in the library?! Didn't you mean anything?!" Lucas almost yelled the words, she could feel herself slip away into the darkness of her mind. "You didn't mean a thing?" He yelled. "Lucas." She softly whispered. "Not a word?!" She saw that strange look in his eyes, the look of endless darkness. "Please, Luke I was confused." She shook her head. "No, I'm sorry." Her heart was falling into pieces, lying, knowing she loved Lucas so much. "Not one single word." He almost cried. "Please Lucas, don't..." Before she even could finish her sentence. Lucas pressed his lips on hers. Peyton was overwhelmed by the sudden touch. She moved her lips a little. "Lair!" Lucas shouted when he broke off the kiss. "You meant it!" Peyton looked in Lucas eyes and saw through all the pain, his everlasting fire. The emotions that were stuck in her finally came out. She took his head between her hands and kissed his velvet lips. Lucas hold her close, he wanted this girl. Confused or not. When he was with Brooke, Lucas always saw Peyton in a way. He found himself too often looking at a picture of Brooke, Peyton and himself. And he totally zoomed out on Peyton. Asking himself how that beautiful girl, became so broken. When he was with her, he didn't think of Brooke. He only could think of that girl with the blond hair who's life was pretty messed up.

Lucas pressed his lips on her again. His hands caressed Peyton's belly. Her body reacted on his touch, pleasure filled her body. Her mind screamed NO, but her body ached for his touch. Lucas took off Peyton's shirt, his velvet lips slid against the nape of her neck. His fingers played around her bra.

"What are we doing?" Lucas' voice sounded confused. "Peyton?" He asked hoarse. Peyton was breathing fast. "Luke …" she whispered so quiet that Lucas didn't hear it. Her lips kissed his cheek. "This is wrong … Peyton, what are we doing? It's wrong." Lucas' voice sounded weird, he began to lose control, his eyes became two dark pools on his face. "Wrong. It's wrong." He kept whispering. Lucas turned away from her.

"Lucas." She said softly. Two sad eyes looked at Peyton, two blue sad eyes from Lucas. His mouth went open, he wanted to say something. But Peyton wouldn't let it happen. She could almost hear the hurting words in her ears.

"I'm sorry." He was going to say "I'm so sorry Peyton. But it's wrong, this is wrong. I love Brooke, not you."

Yeah, that was what he would say. But he was lying if he said that. He thought he didn't love her. But if he looked into his heart, under all the Brooke-stuff, in the deepest place. The special place in his heart, locked with a key. He would find a pretty girl with blond hair and green eyes staring at him. Whispering that she loved him. She was holding the key, and only she could open his heart and put down the walls he had around him. The walls that protect him from hurting Brooke or someone else. But he was hurting himself, keeping all his feelings inside.

Peyton took Lucas' hand and laid it on her heart. Lucas could feel her heart beating. Her heart was beating fast, like his heart. Looking in her green eyes, feeling her heart beating, he suddenly realised something. Gentle he took her hand and laid it on his heart, so she could feel is heart beating. Peyton looked into Lucas' blue eyes. Looking into each others eyes, they realised that their hearts were beating at the same rhythm.

They were sharing different heartbeats in one night.

They lay there on her bed. Making love, not really realizing it. Lips kissed, fingers touched, eyes looked and words were spoken. Spirits were with them. Watching how Lucas and Peyton fell into their desire. Keith Scott, Rebecca Anna Sawyer and Elizabeth Harp better known as 'Ellie' watched at the boy and the girl they had loved, while they were on earth. Their thoughts were the same; maybe they're making a mistake, maybe all the sadness has become confusion, confusion that needed to get out in any way that was possible, maybe this is lust based on they both know they shouldn't have or maybe ... this is the destiny of a true love.

Lucas and Peyton were making love, sweet and gentle. But there was still something missing. The fact that both hearts were still on lock, after all still unsure about their feelings for each other. The fact that in a way, this really was wrong. But memories came back, the first meeting, time passed. Feelings came back, the heated up passion …


	2. Ten Days of Perfect Tunes

Ten days of perfect tunes

**Ten days of perfect tunes**

Lucas saw Peyton again while they were in Dan and Debs bedroom. Seeing those green eyes turning black while he confessed his true feelings. He saw again how hurt she was in that motel room. Her tears, fears and desires. He felt her skin against his again. But the darkness in her eyes filled his mind. His feeling when he saw that heart that Peyton had drawn while he was in coma, that feeling of something you always wanted finally found.

Peyton memories appeared. She saw that faithful look in his blue eyes while he said that he felt his love for here in his heart, the everlasting desire when he said he had to be with her, between the bookshelves in the library. The look in Lucas' eyes, when he said he had to wake up because he didn't want to miss being with her. And that unforgettable look when through all that physical pain coming to her, just to see her.

And at the same moment, they both saw themselves in the library. Not so long ago. The weakness, the pain, the looks in their eyes, the fears, being venerable, the words that were spoken, it all came back to them. And the thing that turned their world upside down. The kiss, Peyton had used her last strength for it.

Lucas climax came quickly, his last stroke was hard and deep. He groaned loud when his highest point was reached. "Peyton." He whispered her name like a prayer. Then Peyton came, she made little sounds. Softly groaning while she felt his lips pressed on hers when she wanted to yell from her pain and pleasure. Both breathless they fell asleep in each others embrace.


	3. Mind is a Razor Blade

Mind is a razor blade

**Mind is a razor blade**

Lucas was the first one to wake up the next morning. It was 5.55 AM. He didn't realize where he was until he found Peyton sleeping in the embrace of his arms. Lucas looked at Peyton. Memories of the night before came back. Words, looks, touches … kisses. The puzzle began to fit. When he looked at Peyton again, he sudden realized the she was naked and so was he. The fact he realized Peyton and he had sex last night blew his mind away. He looked for the third time to Peyton this morning. Watching her peaceful sleep with her body so close against his, it comforted him in some way. He began to lose control when he realized he had betrayed Brooke. But watching Peyton sleep and hear her breathe softly, it kept him quiet, Lucas didn't want to wake Peyton. He was afraid that she would. What would he say or do? How would she react? Unanswered questions. Questions Lucas didn't mind to leave that way.

As careful as he could, he slipped out of the bed. Peyton whispered something. Lucas heart was beating fast by the thought she was going to wake up. But she didn't.

There he stood in the doorway, looking at Peyton. She still was asleep. Questions raced through is mind. Guilt fell down on Lucas. Yesterday, he stood at the same spot, looking at her. Last night she had looked weak, broken and tired of life. Now, she looked different. She looked stronger, there was hope on her pretty face, her fire renewed. But still venerable.

It broke his heart, seeing her there. Knowing she was dreaming of a better life, she finally thought she had found it last night. And he knew he couldn't give her that life. He was with Brooke, Brooke loved him, and he wanted to grow old with her. Or at least that was the safest option.

Being with Brooke was less complicated, loving Brooke was easy. She was pretty, cheery, always in for a some fun. But loving Peyton was complicated, not difficult, but just complicated. The girl had gone through so much, she was unpredictable. She was a mystery, you didn't know how she felt, you didn't know what she thought, you didn't know what she was going to do, you didn't know what she was going to say … you just didn't know, and that made it so complicated.

He was a coward, for walking away from her like this. Yesterday he almost forced her to say that she loved him. And now, in the light of morning, he looked at her, with tears in his eyes. He wanted to love her, and he knew he did. He did love her, but this isn't meant to be, he thought.

Lucas knew he had to go. His mom would probably kick his ass. He wanted to be home before she woke up. Just a minute he though. A minute, he just wanted to look at her for a minute. One minute, Lucas promised himself, just to watch her sleep for one minute. To see how beautiful she was, with her blond hair.

6.55 A.M., he was an hour awake. And most of the time, he had watched Peyton. More than a half hour, he had watched the blond girl, peaceful sleeping. And he was about to break her heart. Quickly he pressed a light kiss on her temple and whispered. "I'm sorry Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer …"

Lucas finally left. His heart was breaking. The front door fell in lock. And Peyton opened her eyes, she was confused when she didn't found Lucas next to her. Suddenly her eyes fell a piece of paper on the pillow next to her. And Peyton didn't know why, but she felt like her heart was going to break as she read it …


	4. Tearks, Darkness And No Conversations

Tears, Darkness and Not Ready For Any Conversation

**Tears, Darkness and Not Ready For Any Conversation**

Tears, tears and more tears. Peyton couldn't stop crying. She had been crying from the moment she woke up, and now, it was evening. She still cried.

Why?

She didn't really know.

Okay, the note he left upset her, but what did she expected?

Did she expect that he was going to stay with her?

That he was going to end things with Brooke?

That Lucas would have stayed in her arms forever?

…

She knew that this was going to happen, it was normal. Why should he stay with her, he was with Brooke, he loved her. But a little piece in her heart had hoped that he still would be here when she woke up, that he would whisper "I love you Peyton Sawyer", hold her close, and kiss her. That the world would fade away, that it just was them. Only them…

Again she picked up the note, read it again, she had been doing that all day, trying to get it.

_Hi Peyton,_

_I didn't know what was on my mind last night, but I made a mistake._

_I'm sorry Peyton, I really am, believe me or not. _

_I hate myself for letting you go through this._

_But Brooke, she's my girl, I can't leave her._

_It didn't mean anything._

_Lucas_

The writing was shaky. Before his name was a word scratched. Peyton focused on it. She wasn't sure what the word was, but when she focused again, she saw different characters appear for her misty eyes. L,…,O,…,V,…,E

Her mouth fell open, he had write LOVE before his name, but he scratched it.

She began to cry again, her pillow wet from her bitter tears. Time passed, and she fell asleep. Losing the battle with sudden deep exhaustion.

In the meantime, Lucas lay on his bed too. Guilt had become a part of him. The darkness around him, black, like his mind. He closed his blue eyes, trying to get some sleep. But he couldn't, every time he closed his eyes, he saw Peyton.

Peyton, she was always on his mind. The big green eyes, full with tears, the blond hair, the skinny figure. Peyton Sawyer.

A light flashed on. "Lucas." His mother stood in his doorway. "Honey, Brooke is here for you." Panic ran through Lucas' body, he hadn't spoke with Brooke today. When she tried to talk to him at school, he had some stupid excuse and left her. But now, he couldn't run or even hide.

"Hi broody, how are you doing?" She jumped on his bed. "I missed you today." She pressed her lips on Lucas'. But Lucas didn't react, Brooke pulled away. "Lucas?" First he didn't answer. "Lucas Scott?" Brooke called his name again. 'Yeah, what's up Brooke?" She looked pissed off. "I try to kiss you, and you don't react. That's not normal." "Oh sorry, try again." Brooke kissed his lips again, he still didn't react.

"Baby, I don't like the game you are playing right now. If you want to play a game, I want to play too." Lucas was confused. So many words, just in one sentence, that's just not like Brooke.

Still he didn't react, Brooke's became really angry in just a few moments.

"Damn, Lucas, it's okay to be sad and all that stuff. But please, if I kiss you, I would like you to kiss me back!"

"I'm sorry Brooke." Her eyes spoke evil. "I'm nothing with your sorry's Luke! What is wrong with you, since Keith died, you've been the weirdest guy on the planet!"

That was a thing she better had left in her mouth, locked away because Lucas became furious, losing himself in anger.

"Damn, Brooke, Keith died, he was like a father for me, and he died! Did you expect that I was going to be happy or something! Well, pretty girl, you've thought wrong!"

Brooke was surprised, not expecting, the words that she had spoken had that huge impact on him.

"I'm so sorry Lucas. I didn't mean it, I'm just pissed off." She began to kiss his cheek, his neck, down to his chest. Lucas' body reacted, but he didn't want to have Brooke near right now, not after last night. Brooke kissed Lucas' lips, her hands touched his back. She tried to remove his T-shirt.

"Brooke, leave." He whispered. "What?" Brooke was amazed. "Brooke, I want you to leave." This time it sounded stronger and louder. "O-o-okay, what are you saying?" He took a deep breath. "Brooke, I want you to leave me alone."

First she was speechless, she wasn't used to be rejected and definitely didn't like it. "Okay, if that is what you want, FINE!" She yelled, with a big and loud smash the door fell in lock. Lucas let himself fall into his bed, closed his tired eyes and tried to shut this world out. This world of sadness. But he hadn't any chance to, two minutes after Brooke left, his mother stood on the side of his bed.

"Lucas, is everything okay?" Her son looked weak, he just lay down on his bed, looking more tired than ever. "Do you want to talk about it?" She sat down on his bed, her hand on his forehead. He felt warm. "No, I don't want to." He whispered. "That's okay, but if you want to, you know where I am." Lucas nodded, his mother looked tired, he knew she was hiding the fact she was hurt too, and she was sad, but she hide it. She walked away from him, when she stood in the doorway, she looked for the last time at him. She putted out the lights, leaving Lucas alone in the dark.

Back at Peyton's house, she was still asleep in her bed. She was so tired that she didn't wake up when her father had entered her room. Her father was standing on the side of her bed. Larry looked at his daughter, his beautiful daughter. How did she become so broken? Where was the little girl he swung around in his strong arms? Where was the time that he was lucky and happy, when he had a wonderful wife he loved, a lovely daughter than was the happiest child on earth?

It all faded away, just one red light, two cars, one who didn't survive …

Larry took a chair and sat down on it, just watching his daughter sleep. After what happened, he didn't want to leave her side. The hours flew by, the dawn came. Peyton still slept and Larry still was sitting next to her bed.

"Don't leave me Lucas." He heard a voice whisper. "Just in case you can't keep your promise." The voice returned. Larry realized that Peyton was talking in her sleep. "It's never going to be the same." She still was talking her sleep and she shivered uncontrollable. Larry climbed on her bed and tried to wake her up.

"Peyton, honey, wake up." He softly brushed her cheek. "Come on, honey, wake up." But she didn't, she felt cold. "Peyton, wake up. Come on!" He began to panic, normally she was a light sleeper, just a little noise could wake her up, but now, it didn't. Larry scanned the room with his eyes, he found a bottle of water standing on the cupboard besides her bed. He grabbed it, it was ice cold. "Just what I need.' He whispered and pressed it lightly on Peyton's forehead. Slowly, Peyton began to wake up. She opened her green eyes and looked into her father's. "Daddy?" Her voice sounded weak. "Hi sweetheart." Larry whispered. "Dad what are …" He laid a finger on her lips. "You don't have to talk Peyton, it's okay." He hugged her, held her close, so close she could hear his heart beating fast.

Time passed by in silence. Her father was the first to say something. "Do you know you talk in your sleep?" Peyton shook her head. "Do I?" Larry laughed softly. "Yes, you do." "What did I say?" She tried to think, since when do I talk in my sleep? "You said: 'Don't leave me Lucas and 'Just in case you can't keep your promise. And the last thing you said …"

Peyton began to cry, first softly, trying to hold it in, but then she began to cry louder.

"Peyton? Is something wrong?" She trembled heavy, her breaths breaking down in sobs. "Honey, what's wrong?" Tears made a wet spot on his blue T-shirt. When he looked at her, he finally began to get it. "Those are things you said during the shooting, isn't it? Things you said to Lucas." She nodded, tears, tears and more tears. She didn't stop crying, it only got worse.

She finally stopped crying, she still laid in her fathers arms. It was 6.45 A.M. "What happened between you and Lucas anyway?" Larry asked while he caressed her blond hair. "I don't want to talk about it." She whispered. "Peyton, sweetie, you can tell me anything, you know that." "And I don't want to talk about it dad!" Larry held her close, it was clear, she didn't want to talk about it, and you couldn't force her to. Sunlight lighted up the room and Peyton fell back asleep in her father's arms.

While Peyton slept in Larry arms, Lucas woke up while Karen watched him.

With other words, when Peyton shut out the day, Lucas had to face a new one.


	5. Try Not To Run, Try Not To Even Hide

Try Not To Run, Try Not To Even Hide

_Author's note: Okay, I have to do it this way because I don't know how to make author's note on the site in another way. So if anyone knows how you can do it another way … tell me, teach me. Now the real stuff … Hi, I know I am a little late with introducing myself, it is not very polite of me, but that's because of the AN thingD So, I am GirlinTheCafe, my real name is Veronique. Some people here might know me from my work on the Lucas&Peyton fanfiction which for some reason doesn't exist anymore '( So I came here to go further with my stories. For the people who read my work on leytonfic. I am sorry that I don't continue at the point where I left off but I have some reasons. First, I don't want to overflow everyone with posting a story with more as 20 chapters at once. Second, I have my June exams start__ing soon and I am preparing already a bit. So now I am focusing on studying and much writing time will not be left over. But don't you worry, I'll update two times a week (Wednesday and Sunday) and I am writing further on my stories. As soon as summer vacation starts I'll update the left over chapters swifter after each other so I can give you my new chapters. I hope I didn't make this too confusing … And the other thing, I don't know if anyone has read my bio but I am from Belgium and in daily life is speak Dutch and English is a language I am learning in school so it's not flawless. Grammar and tenses probably are a mess and I am sorry for that. These chapters are not my best, and I am also sorry for that. But they are written more than a year ago so, it's actually from my beginning phase. I re-read them, fixed some mistakes, added and erased little things. Much love … _

**Try Not To Run, Try Not To Even Hide**

6.01 A.M., in the house of the family Sawyer, there was a lot of activity yet, notwithstanding it was early in the morning. The day had come that Peyton finally had to go to school again. Against her will, but she needed to go. It was a whole challenge for Peyton to get dressed and pack her schoolbag. She was hopping around the room on one leg. It all did go well until she tried to remove a vase with flowers and it fell onto the ground, shattering into pieces.

It didn't take Larry long to get into his daughter's room, he was afraid Peyton had fallen again. The last couple of days, she had fallen more than fifteen times, because she refused to use her crutches. He had tried to talk her into it, more than once, but she didn't want to. "Dad, I don't need them, I'm strong enough. And if I'm not, well than I've learn to be strong enough." Larry had looked worried, but if Peyton wanted this, than she could get it. Peyton always had been an obstinate girl, and she was going to stay that way no matter what.

"Are you sure, you don't need any help or something?" Larry saw how his daughter tried to get her trousers on. "It's okay dad." She said. It seemed like Peyton and her trousers had a big fight, and her trousers were going to win. Larry couldn't see her longer struggle with it, so he walked to his daughter and grabbed her gently by her shoulders. "Stand still." He commanded. "Dad, this so humiliating." She whispered uncomfortable. "What is the most humiliating?" He asked while helping Peyton into her pants. "Your daddy helping you to get into your pants or you going to school without them?" She laughed softly. "You're right. Thank you." She turned around and pressed a gentle kiss on her father's cheek. "I'm downstairs making breakfast, if you need me, just yell." He smiled while he looked at his pretty daughter standing before him. "I will." Her green eyes shined warmly for the first time since he was home again. An affectionate feeling took a hold of him, this precious glance of her beautiful eyes would be forever remembered in his memory.

Peyton watched her father when he walked out the door and heard how he went downstairs. "This is good." She whispered to herself. Letting her dad in, it was good. It was hard, but the feeling of happiness when she let him in. It was worth it. Peyton always saw herself as an independent woman, she was one. Her dad was so much away, she lived alone the biggest part of the year. But now when her dad was back home for a while, she needed to put those walls down again. The independence wasn't a need anymore, her dad made that clear last night. "It's okay to depend on somebody Peyton, you're not alone in this world. I'm not always here for you, when I should be here. But there are a lot of people out there that you can depend on. Please Peyton, don't shut them out." With his words on her mind she walked out the room but then she stood before the stairs. Careful, she tried to jump from one stair to the one below it. She almost slipped when she tried to do that again. Her heart was racing, she felt sweaty all of a sudden.

There she stood, on the stairs, no option to go up or down. Her leg began to hurt, and then the other. Peyton cursed furiously under her breath. But slowly she began to realize that her dad was home again. "Dad! Daddy!" She yelled. Peyton heard how her father dropped things. "Where's the fire, honey?!" "Here!" She shouted loud. Larry saw his daughter standing on the stairs, he smiled. "What's wrong?" She rolled her green eyes. "This is so embarrassing, but I can't get off the stairs. I'm stuck in here I think." Larry laughed, seeing Peyton standing there, he saw how her walls finally broke down a little. He ran up the stairs, he took his daughter gently in his strong arms and carried her downstairs. "Well, that's that, princess." Neither of them spoke, Peyton closed her eyes when her head rested against her father's chest, she felt safe there. Larry looked at his daughter, her walls were coming down, smooth with the ground. Very careful, Larry putted Peyton down on the ground again, trying his best not to hurt her. "See." He whispered. "You can trust people and depend on them. Just give a yell and they'll be there. But only if you let them in and give them a real chance." She hugged him. "I will dad, I will, I promise." Tears in her eyes, she almost started crying again. It felt so good, knowing that her father was so protective and tried to make thing better for her.

"Come on princess, enough time wasted. Let's have breakfast, I've been baking pancakes for you."

At the time Peyton was having breakfast, Lucas sat down on his bed. Checking his schoolbag, checking every single book and piece of paper in the bag. When he finally had finished that. He heard a knock on his door. Haley entered his room. "Hi Luke." She came over to his bed and hugged her best friend and bother in law. "Dude, you look very bad!" Nathan entered his room also. "Nice to hear little bro." Lucas tried to laugh, but it was just a try. Haley immediately saw that something was wrong with Lucas. "Nathan, would you mind to leave Lucas and me alone for a second?" He saw how miserable his big brother looked. "Okay. Fine." Nathan kissed his wife gently and walked away. Haley didn't speak until she was sure that Nathan wasn't around anymore.

"What's up Lucas? You look like crap." The dark blue spots under his eyes were awful, his skin almost white. "Well thank you Hales." He answered ironic. "What's going on Luke? Brooke said to me that you were acting weird last night." His stomach felt like it was twisted around. "Weird, what she calls weird! That I don't want to have sex with her because it's too early after Keith's dead. That's not weird, maybe for a second, she needs to stop being needy about that!" His blue eyes turned darker. "Hey Lucas, it's okay. You don't need to explain things if you don't want to. But after Keith's dead, you've become so quiet and you're putting up walls." She took a deep breath. "I don't like that. And I see it in your eyes, something happened that really turned you around." "Keith died, that's a pretty good reason to be upset." Haley took his hand in hers. "Lucas, let those walls fall, you know you're lying! Since when do you lie Luke? What have you done that was so bad that you're putting yourself into this dark places?" Haley had touched a sensitive spot. "What makes you think I've done something I regret?" Lucas felt uncomfortable, knowing if Haley talked long enough, he would break and confess. "I know you Luke! What have you done? Tell me Lucas, you know you can tell me anything." She gently rubbed her best friend's hand. "It's complicated Hales. It's …" A voice called from the kitchen. "Hey ladies, hurry up! We're going to be late!" That was definitely Nathan. He entered Lucas' bedroom again.

"Come on. Are you trying to steal my wife? Next time, maybe you should kiss the spot just below her ear. That's her weak spot, you know." Nathan blinked at his brother. "NATHAN!" Haley screamed and slapped him. "I know where your weak spot is, Nathan Scott, you better watch out before I'll let you know that on a less pleasure way as I normal would do!" Lucas closed his eyes. "Gross, my best friend and my little brother's sex life! Man, can it get any worse?"

"Okay, now, we really need to go!" Karen came into Lucas' bedroom, knowing her son was about to leave for school. "Have a nice day sweetie." She gave him a soft kiss on his left cheek. Lucas hugged her fast and ran to Nathan's car. The three Scott's left Karen alone.

"I'm driving you to school." Larry took his coat and car keys. "You don't have to, dad." She took her schoolbag and tried to jump out the kitchen on one leg. "Peyton, you're not able to drive your car or bike. And walking isn't an opportunity. I'm bringing you to school and pick you up afterwards." Peyton's mouth went open but Larry cut her off. "Don't complain about it. I am going to do that for a while. Until your leg is better." He hugged his daughter. "Come on honey, we're going to be late."

The school halls were full with people. Everyone in a rush to get in class in time, not risking detention. Peyton stood for her locker, hoping she would not run into somebody she knew anytime soon. But that was too late. Brooke ran to her. "Peyton! You're back! Gosh I missed you so much." She hugged her best friend. "Hi Brooke, good to see you too." Peyton's head began to spin. 'This is going so wrong.' She thought. 'When Brooke is near, so is Lucas.' Speaking of the devil…

Lucas walked down the hallway up to Brooke and her. "Hi Peyton." She saw how uncomfortable he felt, just like her, they hadn't spoken after their night. "Come on Lucas. Hug her." That was Brooke, Lucas just stood there watching at the two girls. "Come on Luke, she's not going to break or something." Lucas hugged Peyton lightly. The bell rang. And the three had to go to class.

"How are you actually doing Peyton?" It was lunch on Tree Hill High. "It's okay, I have painkillers for my leg. I don't want to take them, but my dad forced me to." The girls talked while Lucas just sat there, watch them. He observed Peyton, he saw how uncomfortable she was in Brookes proximity. He was glad Brooke had so much to tell to her, Lucas didn't know how to act when Peyton's was near. It would be so painful, Peyton not knowing how to act, he not knowing how to act. Brooke wasn't stupid, she would notice that there was something wrong. Lucas also saw Peyton suffer. Her painkillers were working out. One question still played in his mind. How could they have had sex? Peyton couldn't lean on her leg or even move it and she suffered even as she took painkillers. How could she have had sex with him? She must been in a lot of pain, wanting it so much that she suffered ten times harder than she normally should.

The bell rang again, to let the people know lunch was over.

A few hours later, the bell rang again, to let know school was over for today. It was hard for Peyton to walk out school to the parking. Lucas could see her suffer, but he knew, if he tried to help her now, he was certainly going to regret that later. But he decided to watch Peyton until her dad came to pick her up. Nathan and Haley had to do some shopping so he had a long walk back to his home. And Brooke was also busy with other activities. More then twenty minutes passed by, still Peyton stand on the parking, leaning on her crutches. Even from this distance, Lucas could see how tired Peyton was and she was suffering.

Slowly he walked to her. "Peyton, is everything okay?" He asked. "No Lucas, go away!" She yelled. "No I don't, I keep waiting here with you until your dad is here." Anger in Peyton's chest began to grow fast. "No you don't Lucas, you leave right now." Lucas tried to touch Peyton's shoulder. "LEAVE ME ALONE!" She yelled loud and she tried to walk away. But then she suddenly felt dizzy and she began to shiver. "Peyton!" Lucas caught her just in time, before she fell, not able to save her crutches from smacking on the ground. Fast he carried her to a bench and sat down with her on his lap.

It took a couple of minutes for Peyton to realize where she was. Then she felt Lucas strong arms around her. Furiously she began to push Lucas and began to scream. "Leave me alone Lucas!" Peyton tried to escape but it was just a try, Lucas pressed Peyton against his chest. "Come down Peyton! You're not going anywhere. And I definitely don't leave you alone when you're like this."

Peyton was going to scream again but then she heard her father's worried voice. "Oh God, Peyton what happened?" He stood before the bench. Peyton tried to say something but Lucas cut her off. "She collapsed, but I was there just in time to catch her before she fell." "God, thank you Lucas! You saved my daughter's life again. It's really getting a habit for you, isn't it?" "I guess Larry." They both laughed, Peyton just lay in Lucas' arms wishing she was elsewhere. "Come on Peyton, we're going to the doctors." He carried her to the car and set her down in the passenger's seat. Her crutches were placed in the backseat when Larry had picked them up.

"Lucas, is there any change you can have dinner with us tomorrow night?" Larry asked while he walked around the car "I can fix that, why?" "Well, since you're my daughter's hero, I really want to thank you. So, do you think you can be at my house tomorrow night round 6 o'clock?" Lucas looked at Peyton, she looked shocked and he knew she wasn't very happy with it. But he had to say yes. If he didn't say it, Larry would notice that something was wrong between Peyton and him. And also Lucas didn't want to be rude.

"Okay, see you tomorrow. Bye Larry, bye Peyton." The car drove away, and left Lucas standing on the parking while one question filled his mind.

'What did I do wrong to get my life this complicated?'


	6. From a Whisper To a Scream

From a Whisper To a Scream

**m****From a Whisper To a Scream**

Lucas stood before his mirror, he was questioning himself what to wear.

His blue vest, no that was trying too hard.

His black shirt with long sleeves, maybe that was too casual.

Or should he wear his red T-shirt, no that's not matching with his jeans?

Maybe, his green sweater, but that ...

"Oh gosh Lucas, stop acting like a girl." He whispered to the blond boy in the mirror. Karen passed by his room and saw the different garments on his bed. She began to laugh loudly. "What's so funny mom?" Lucas saw her imagine from the mirror, he turned around. She first had to swallow a few times before she could talk again. "Well, this is so funny, Lucas Scott doesn't no what to wear. That's the first time." "Ha ha ha." He answered ironic. "But please, mom, help me, this is difficult." Karen smiled and entered his room. "Well, honey, I think you should wear brown sweater with light brown strips." He moaned. "Come on mom, you can't be serious?!" Karen laughed, for the first time in a really long time. "I'm kidding Lucas, the black shirt with the long sleeves. I really like that one. You look very sexy in that shirt, black is your colour." "Mom!" "I'm kidding Lucas, but that shirt is nice on you." She hugged him. "Hurry up, you're going to be late."

In the meantime Peyton lay on her bed. Only wearing black underwear and one of her father's T-shirts. She wanted to sleep, so bad, she wanted to sleep, shut out this world. "Sweetheart, Lucas can be here any second. You need to get dressed." She opened her eyes and looked at her dad. His beautiful eyes, they had such a sad look. Larry looked at Peyton, his daughter, she looked so tired of everything. In no time, Peyton could build her walls up again. Really strong and steady walls. But it took much more time to let them fall again. Larry saw her struggle with it, fighting against them, didn't want them to rise again. But they did. He knew that there was no possibility to let them fall again anytime soon.

"And girly, what do you want to wear?" Larry stood before her closet, trying to cheer her up. "Well, I love that green dress, do you want to wear it?" She shook her head and closed her eyes again. Larry saw how she tried to shut the world out again. 'Keep talking to her.' He though. 'Just keep talking, I won't let her slip into that dark place in her mind again.'

"Come on Peyton. Lucas can be here any minute. What do you want to wear?" She opened her eyes and looked at her father. 'I'm selfish. Why do a treat my father like this? It's not his fault Lucas is an idiot and I'm a stupid fool.' She took a deep breath. 'Be strong.' She thought. 'In a few hours everything is over for a while. Just be strong and be nice to Lucas.' She walked to her closet. "My denim skirt and Tric-shirt is okay."

She just finished her make-up when the doorbell rang. Downstairs she heard Lucas' warm voice. "Come in Rake Boy, Peyton can be here any minute. She's getting ready."

She tried to make her way off the stairs, but she realized that she needed help again. Otherwise, she would probably fall again. "Dad!" She yelled. In no time Larry stood before the stairs, Lucas just behind him. "Help me. Still stuck her." She smiled innocently. Larry laughed too. But then there were weird noises coming from the kitchen. "My dinner. Lucas do you mind helping my beautiful daughter?" Lucas nodded. "I don't mind at all." Larry speeded away and then there was only Lucas and Peyton.

Lucas walked upstairs and tried to pick Peyton up. But she refused to let him touch her. "Don't even think about it." She whispered, her eyes on fire. "How are things going there?" Larry shouted from the kitchen. "As safe as your dinner!" Lucas shouted back. Lucas looked Peyton in the eyes. "I know you don't want this." He whispered. "But I guess you don't want your dad to find out what happened?" She nod and let Lucas carry her downstairs.

"Is the food edible?" Larry asked worried by seeing Lucas' face. "Yeah, it's delicious. But I expected frozen pizzas, to be honest." Larry laughed. "Did you tell him Peyton?" Peyton nodded. "Yeah, I did." The three laughed. "But Larry, your dinner is delicious." Lucas liked his lips. Peyton couldn't help it, and smiled. "Well, single parent cooking class, it really helped me. How's your mom doing? I'm a bit worried about her, she's a strong woman. But I knew that Keith was a big support for her and that they finally had found each other." Larry looked at Lucas, Lucas still wasn't used it. People talking about Keith like a dead person, for Lucas Keith was still here, somehow.

"She's doing fine I guess. I know she's sad and she misses him, but she realizes that she needs to move on. We're trying to make it work without him, but it's hard." Seconds of silence. "Really hard." Larry saw the tears in Lucas' young eyes. "It's all going to be okay. It just needs time. I still miss my wife, every day I think of her. But she's in heaven now. And I know she wants me to be happy, and she wants Peyton to be happy. And so is Keith too. He wants you to be happy and your mom to be happy." After his words, silence returned.

The dinner was pretty good. Larry and Lucas talked about sports, writers, life in general. Peyton just watched and listened. It was great to see that her dad and Lucas were having funny, that 'the click' between them was there.

"Thank you for saving my daughter's life, Rake Boy." Larry stood up and hugged Lucas. The older man had tears shining in his eyes. Peyton hadn't seen that much before. "It was with all my pleasure." Lucas hugged Larry back but kept looking at Peyton. The look was so strong that she needed to look away, she needed to escape it.

A few hours passed by. It was round 11.00 P.M. Peyton was fighting against the sleep, the men saw her struggle with it. "Well, princess, I think it's bedtime for you." Larry stood up but he almost fell after he did a few steps, after all the wine he had drunk. "Well, Larry, what if I bring Peyton upstairs?" He asked and stood up. "Well, Lucas son. Thank you, that would be very handy for me." Peyton's eyes shot fire. She could have killed Lucas with her smouldering look. "Come on Peyton. Let me bring you upstairs." Taking Peyton by the arm.

"You can go now." She said when she took her pyjama. But Lucas didn't leave, he just stood there in her doorway, looking at her. "Lucas, you can go. I'm fine now." His blue eyes kept looking at the girl with the blond curls before him. "Thank you and goodbye Lucas. It was a nice evening, my dad had a lot of fun. But now it's late and you probably should be going." Finally Lucas turned around and walked out. The pressure and tension that had rested on Peyton's shoulders seemed slide off her, leaving her relieved. She began to take her clothes off. It all went well until she tried to get her pyjama pants on. "Damn." She whispered. She closed her eyes and lay back, gasping for some air. But suddenly she felt two warm hands on her hips, helping her into her pants. "Thank you daddy." She whispered, her eyes still closed. She wanted to kiss the one who helped her, but when she opened her eyes. Her look met with two blue eyes, two eyes she always recognized. "Lucas!"

"God. You scared me." He smiled, or rather, he smirked. "Well, you needed help so. That's not scary. Well, can you say thank you?" She gasped. "Lucas leave!" She brought out. "That's not the thank you I excepted." Lucas tried to hug Peyton but she pushed him away, he was drunk. But he tried again.

"What part of: LEAVE ME ALONE LUCAS SCOTT! You don't understand?" She yelled all of a sudden furious. "Well, since you don't get it!" Peyton pointed with one of her crutch to Lucas. "Leave stands for: get your fucking ass out of my bedroom. Me stands for, me Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer. Alone, represents ME by myself without no-one other around. Lucas is your first name if I remember clearly and Scott stands for the last name you inherited from that son of a bitch of your father called Dan!" Peyton chest moved fast up and down, her green eyes turned dark and her voice was sharp. Lucas watched her, saw how she fell into the darkness of her mind. But he wouldn't let it happen.

Lucas grabbed Peyton lightly by her shoulders and pushed her into the nearby wall. He pressed his full lips on hers, she opened her mouth a little in pure shock, Lucas slipped his eagerly tongue into her mouth. His hands slide from her cheeks down to her waist. Lucas pulled Peyton as close as possible to him. He deepened the kiss, but Peyton barely responded.

Slowly Peyton began to realize again what was happing. With all the strength she had in her tired, she pushed Lucas away from her.

"Lucas!" She yelled. "What are you doing?" They both stood there, Peyton leaning against the wall. Lucas just one step away from her. They both were gasping from what happened just seconds before. "Lucas leave." She whispered in a dark voice. He just stood there, breathing fast, looking at the blonde girl before him.

"Go away Lucas." She passed him by, but he grabbed her by her arm and pulled her close. In an attempt to try to kiss her again. "Lucas, stop it! You have not the right the mess with my head right now!" "What?" "Stop messing me up Lucas! You did that the last time when you were here, and now you're doing it again! My life is already complicated enough without you, and now you're making it worse to mess with my head! After what happened in the library, I was afraid to face Brooke or you, or anyone else. And after that other night, I can't look at Brooke and have the feeling that I need to throw up because I feel so guilty of sleeping with you!" She stopped talking for a few seconds to take a deep breath. "And now I want you to leave." He didn't move a muscle. "Just leave Lucas." And again Lucas tried to kiss Peyton. She left one of her crutches fall and slapped him in the face. "DAMN LUCAS! YOU'RE DRUNK, GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!" She screamed furious. Lucas looked confused like a little child, his hand pressed on his painful cheek. "Get out Lucas." She whispered with a harsh voice. Suddenly Lucas wasn't drunk anymore, he was as sober as before he came here. "I'm sorry." He whispered. "I'm so sorry." Quickly he grabbed Peyton by her shoulders and pressed a kiss on her cheek. "I'm so sorry Peyton." He whispered and left her.

There she was standing in her room, tears in her green eyes. And she cried again. How many had she cried since the shooting? So many times, and almost every time she cried because of Lucas. She wanted to hate him so much, for everything he had done to her, but she couldn't. She still did love him.

But what was she going to do about that?


	7. Not While I am Around

Not While I'm Around

**Not While I'm Around**

The sun shined, little whites clouds were in the perfect blue sky. A new day in Tree Hill, one of the most beautiful days of the year, but for two certain people, the sky was black and full with dark clouds, the shattered sky, as by storm, or at least, they would love it. It would fit perfectly by there feelings. Their feelings, black of guilt, grey of depressing thoughts. Their lives where shattered. They both lost people they loved so much, the most important people in their young and venerable life, both the had done things they regret, they had feelings locked up, and they both wished they could be in each others arms. Maybe they wouldn't admit it, but that was the true. The Lord knows, sure he knew that. There were four people in heaven, knowing that this boy and girl wanted each other so much, but that fate wouldn't let them be what they wanted. That thing called 'fate' isn't fair, and the boy and the girl knew that better than anyone else in this town.

The boy lost his uncle, who was like a father to him, who was going to be his father for real. He was the man that made his mother smile, laugh, young again. He was the man his mother was going to marry, going to grow old with, he would make her happy, and that would make the boy happy too, because his mother deserved to be happy after everything that happened in her life. But just one bullet made an end to his life, and shattered the lives of many other people.

The girl lost her both mothers. The mother, who always cared for her, was like a real mother for her, because the girl didn't know better than that she was, but she died too soon. Just one red light was crossed, and she paid a high prise, her life. The girl also lost her birthmother, who died from breast cancer. The girl only knew her for a short time, the girl had after everything that happened finally put her walls down, to let her in, to hear the music and enjoy, but then her birthmother died.

Yeah life isn't fair, and those two people knew it.

It was afternoon in Tree Hill, Peyton and Lucas were in class, listening to their teacher or at least they tried to do that. For the girl it wasn't so easy. She was drawing. The sketch was a web and Peyton was in the middle of it. And there were wires around her and they made a way away from her, and at the end of the wires there were different persons. A boy was on the right side of Peyton. If you looked close enough, you saw the typical Lucas Scott-smirk, he was above her. The wire right of her left side, at the end of it there was a girl, and it was Brooke. There were much more wires, and there were different persons. Her father, Jake and Jenny, Nathan, her mom and Ellie. Really concentrated she wrote characters above it. 'My Life'. Bell rang, class was over. Slowly Peyton stood up, packed her bag and left the classroom. She was the last one to leave, all the other students were in the hall already, but Peyton took her time, she needed to with her hurt leg, she couldn't go fast. When she finally had made her way into the hall, back to her locker, Lucas stood there waiting for her. Peyton immediately turned around, not Lucas, not now. But Lucas came after her, he had so much to say to her, he wanted to excuse about his behaviour Friday night. It was a big step of the line that he should be walking on. He was still with Brooke and he had hurt that brunette a lot. Sleeping with Peyton, kissing her, wanting to feel her again so close to him. Where was his mind? But it was true, Lucas felt desire when he looked at Peyton. He regretted what happened between Peyton and him, but not for the full hundred percent. Being one with her, had left a really strong feeling on him.

Lucas grabbed her arm and pulled her into a stockroom. Peyton was about to yell but Lucas cut her off. "I'm sorry Peyton, for what happened Friday night in your bedroom." Peyton rolled her eyes. "Yeah sure. Now, leave me alone." She tried to walk away again but Lucas pulled her back. His sorry blue eyes looked into her withholding green eyes, the look was intense. Peyton could feel herself fall into his beautiful eyes, but she wouldn't let it happen, not again. It wouldn't be a good plan, it never was, would never be.

Lucas was the first to talk again. "You haven't talked to anyone lately. Not to me, not to Brooke or Haley or Nathan. They're getting suspicious." She rolled her eyes annoyed. "My life is none of their business!" Lucas closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He could feel her breath on his face. Immediately, without realizing it, he leaned in and brushed his lips against hers. Peyton slapped hard Lucas across his cheek. She looked furious, Lucas took her wrists and held them close to her body. Knowing she was about to kick his ass if he didn't. Finally, she was calm enough again, and Lucas let go off her carefully.

"Get out of your fantasies Lucas, it's never going to happen." She whispered harsh and cold. "What is never going to happen?" Lucas was startled and confused. "Us Lucas. You're with Brooke now. Our chance is passed by." She looked around, and then looked back at Lucas. "And by the way, thank you Luke. Because of you, I need to wear this bandage." She pointed at her injured knee, her voice was ironic. "Longer than I normally would!" Lucas was even more confused. "What? What did I do?" She rolled her eyes. "We had S-E-X, remember?! And our one-nightstand has a few consequences for me. I went to the doctor last week, and he asked me what I had done because there was something not so good with my leg!" "What did you say?" Lucas didn't know how the react, he held is breath. "That I kept trying to walk on it without my crutches. You can breathe again Lucas, our dirty little secret is save with me." She looked angry, near to pure rage. "What did he say further?" He asked silently. "That my recovery was going slower, but that everything would heal but that it would take a whole while"

There they stood, uncomfortable. Silence stretching out in minutes. "Can I go now?" Peyton looked at her arm, Lucas' hand still was on it. Lucas looked baffled, like someone who just woke up from a weird dream. Her eyes getting more intense when she looked at the blond Scott boy. He shook his head at first but then nodded. "Yeah, you can."

He saw how Peyton opened the door and walked away, or rather said, stumble away on her crutches. His heart was hurting, ached for Peyton. But what was he doing or what was he thinking? He was with Brooke, but this feeling for Peyton was so strong, he couldn't think of anything else.

She disappeared into the day. Was it always going to be like this? This unbearable tension between them? This feeling so strong, it took control, even if you didn't want to? Would he always keep it locked up and would she always walk away from him like this?


	8. It Was About Time But PS Has To Confess

It Was About Time But I Have to Confess: Peyton

**It Was About Time But ****I Have to Confess: Peyton**

It was evening, just after dinner. Peyton lay down on her bed, on the wall before her, there was the drawing she made earlier that day, and it was on the middle of it. Peyton just lay there on the bed, eyes wide open, looking at the drawing. Her mind was full with thoughts. They were racing against each other. Peyton's head was tired, she felt sick, she had a terrible headache. But that was not the only part of her body were was hurt. Her heart was hurting too.

"Lucas." She whispered, breaking the silence with her weak voice.

"Lucas." She whispered again, almost praying. He was the reason that her heart was hurting, the reason why her heart was bleeding. He was the reason she was confused, messed up, not able to take care of herself for a longer time. She knew it was just about time and than she would break down. Since their one night stand, she tried to avoid Lucas, she blamed him for everything that went wrong in her life. She screamed and yelled, pushed and kicked. But it wouldn't relieve her. The anger inside of her kept growing, it made her feel sick inside. She knew why, she tried to fool herself, telling herself that Lucas was the one that made her feel that way. But it was not the truth, or at least, not whole truth.

She was the one who started this all again. If she didn't confess her feelings in the library, if she didn't kiss him. Everything would be fine. Lucas would be happy with Brooke and she would find someone else, probably she would turn to Jake again. But now, it was all screwed up now.

She couldn't run, she couldn't hide herself, it was not possible. If she would turn to Jake at this moment, he would notice immediately that something was wrong. She would throw it all out, she knew she would and he would send her back. Telling her she should follow her heart, not her head.

Larry entered the room. He noticed the changes in Peyton's behaviour the last couple of days, weeks. She finally had put down her walls, but now they were higher than ever. He wanted to know what was wrong with his daughter. He was barely at home, and he knew that he should be home more often. Peyton had so much misery the last couple of years and there was so much stuff he didn't know about. He felt so guilty, he was a sort of running away from her, when he actually should be on her side, being a rock for her, to get her through all the tough times. So he promised himself and he promised on his late wife's crave. "I'm not about to let her down again, love. I've promised you the day she was brought to us, to take care of her, for the rest of my life. And I didn't do that, especially since you died. I feel so guilty about that. I hope you can forgive me." Tears fell on the grey gravestone. "I swear, this time I will take care of her. I'll take of 'our little girl', I will, I promise you." He pressed his lips on the grave. A kiss, send to heaven, to the wife he had loved so much. He walked away from the grave. Hoping that it were not empty promises he made.

Larry walked into his daughter's bedroom, he immediately noticed the new drawing on the middle of the wall. He looked at it, very concentrated. Trying to get the secret message in it. Every drawing of Peyton had a secret message, but not everyone got that. In the beginning, he didn't notice the message, but he was trained on it now. He kept staring at it. The message slowly filled his mind.

If you looked close enough, you could see little wires connecting different people. A little wire from Lucas to Brooke, from himself to his wife, their wires met Ellies wire. Jake was connected with Lucas and Nathan. Lucas and Nathan were connected with each others. It stood for the different connections between them in real life.

Then he looked at his daughter. Peyton lay down on her bed, her eyes staring at the ceiling, she looked so tired. Since the shooting, she always looked tired, she was tired. She didn't sleep well, she still had nightmares about it. But she was also a different tired, tired of this life, of everything that happened to her. She wanted it to stop, but she couldn't, she just wanted some peace, the peace she didn't found in her young life.

Larry sat down besides her, he looked at her. "Hi Peyton." He whispered. She didn't say anything, she just stared at her father. She didn't know why, but she had the feeling she just had to tell everything to her dad. Peyton knew her father was so worried about her behaviour and what happened during the shooting, it really changed her. Still she didn't tell him anything about it, hoping she could banish everything out of her mind.

But the weight of all the secrets, the guilty and the sadness kept growing, getting so heavy on her tiny body. She just need to put all the stuff out, she had to confess.

She looked at her father, seeing his worried face. Peyton still doubted. But then she took all the courage she could find in her body and began …

"Daddy, there's something I need to tell you." She took a deep breath. "I just want you to listen to me and not speak a word before I'm finished." Larry nodded, he saw how serious his daughter was. He knew this was the chance to get through her walls, finally.

"Do you remember a few weeks ago, that you heard me talking in my sleep?" He nodded. "Well." She took a deep breath. "There are a lot of things happened during the shooting, I can't take them back." She closed her eyes and continued speaking. Memories began to come back.

"When I was alone in the library, and I was bleeding so heavy. I was so afraid, I really thought that I would die on the spot where I sat. And then, all of a sudden there was Lucas, standing before me. How he looked at me, so worried but so brave and so gentle at the same time. It really made it feel better or something. He was so protective, he stayed with me every second possible, he stayed as near he could. But he did his best not to hurt me, he really did. When tried to find out what is was in my leg, I was in so much pain but he comforted me with his attendance. Even when he putted on his shirt for pressuring my leg, he was so careful. If I groaned or yelled, it looked like he had pain too, like he felt it too. Lucas made it feel less bad."

Larry looked at his daughter. Peyton took in a deep breath.

"And if done something I can't take back. Something that has affected a lot of relationships. When we were in the library, Lucas kept me awake by letting me talk and it all was so taking control over me, Lucas so near me. All my feelings got mixed up, and we were talking and suddenly I saw the golden gates of heaven or something. And than I've done something, I confessed Lucas that I still loved him and I kissed him. But when I had done that, how he looked at me, like it was all okay, that I was supposed to do that. So warm, so gentle, I can't forget about it." Larry looked worried at his daughter.

"Peyton." Larry wanted to say his daughter how sorry he felt for her. Peyton interruptedhim. "No dad that's not the only that happened." Peyton took a deep breath and closed her eyes, trying to figure out a way she could tell her father about her one night stand with Lucas. "There's something more, the day after Keith's funeral Lucas has visited me. In the evening he came by. He wanted to see how I was doing. But when I was talking to him, he broke down. He was so upset over Keith's dead and he felt like the world was beating him. So I comforted him and time passed by. We rested because he saw me suffer and I showed him the wound. And … suddenly he kissed me, first I tried to talk to him, saying him it was wrong but he began to yell and began to talk about what I've said in the library. I swear, I really tried to tell him he should go home or to Brooke." She paused. "But then he said Brooke didn't understand him but I did. And at that point I stopped fighting my feelings and gave into them." A tear rolled down her cheek, Larry was shocked, slowly he took her hand and squeezed it. "I slept with him and the next morning I woke up. He had left a note." Peyton stood up and took the note out a drawer and gave it to her father. He read it, finally he began to get it all. Her strange behaviour, her walls, her furious reactions and uncomfortable looks when Lucas was near or he was the subject of a conversation. "It's my fault his life is messed up. I promised myself I wouldn't hurt Brooke again and I did betrayal her again. All the misery is my fault!" Larry took his daughter in his arms, he saw she was about to cry. "Sshh, honey, you can't blame yourself for this, it's not only your fault. But what about Jake, where were your feelings for Lucas then? When you were with him?"

"When I was with Jake, I just denied everything. I hided away after his back. There was always so much to care about. He, Jenny, Nicki. It just made me forgot about everything for a while. But now I finally see the real me, feel my true feelings. There's no place to hide anymore. Now I need to be honest with myself, with you, with Lucas, with everyone. At this point in my life, there's just no place to hide anymore, I finally feel free. And I'm free to say: I'm in love with Lucas, I love Lucas Scott." Larry looked at his daughter. Tears in her beautiful eyes and tears in his eyes. Before him stood no longer his little girl, no, there stood a wonderful woman. A brave woman, his daughter Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer. Finally she had let go off her safe walls that blocked every entrance around her, they were smooth with the ground. She was brave enough to confess how she felt, what happened. But it was not going to be easy, her true feelings, were feelings she actually couldn't have. She knew that but she was unhesitating to tell Lucas about she really felt. Peyton could tell the world if she wanted to. She would, if the time was right, she would tell …


	9. It Was About Time But LS Has To Confess

It Was About Time But I Have to Confess: Lucas

**It Was About Time But ****I Have to Confess: Lucas**

It was evening, Lucas was alone in his bedroom, he sat down and tried to think. He felt like he had to confess. It was getting hard on his mom.

The silence he brought, the behaviour that changed, the moods that could chance in a second, and the fights with Brooke. He was only wraith from what he was supposed to be. Still there was the grief what Keith had left with his dead. Karen walked into her son's room, she found the blond boy staring at the wall, his notebook and pen before him on the desk. Karen took the notebook and read the few lines on the page.

_It wasn't meant to happen, it wasn't meant to be. Us two in the middle of three. I know I have hurt you so many times before, our deepest trust is lost so long ago. I promised myself I would stop hurting you. But it's a promise I can make come true. This world doesn't stop turning, even if I want to. But I still wonder or you could forgive me through. I hope you can, 'cause in so many ways, I somehow, I never stopped loving you._

Karen lay it down on his desk again. She went to the bed and sat down on it. Silence was still there. They hadn't said a word since she came in. "Lucas, I think it's time for you to tell me what's on your mind." Lucas turned himself around in his chair, Karen lay one hand besides her leg, inviting Lucas to come sit down next to her. Slowly he stood up and sat down next to his mother. Tenderly Karen grabbed Lucas' hand, squeezing it very lightly. Her two restless eyes looking into the bewildering ones of her son. None of them spoke a word. Just letting the silence fill the room.

"Lucas." Karen was the first to speak. She interrupted the dialogue in Lucas' head, he tried to prepare the things he would say to his mother, the way he would say them. He wanted to lead her in gentle, saying her not to worry too much, it was not something that couldn't be fix. But he wasn't so sure about that. But then it just slipped out of his mouth.

"I've slept with Peyton." The first second Karen realized what her son had said, she just let it slip in her mind. But when she finally realized how serious it was what he had said. Karen slapped her son across the face. Red imprints of her fingers where across his sad face. She didn't show so much sorry than she had done before when he had told that Brooke was pregnant. But that Brooke had lied. Actually Karen didn't show anything of her feelings at all. She knew this was a fault, was a fault that could have been averted. The one he made with Brooke wasn't from the same kind as these one.

The air in Lucas' bedroom suddenly seemed heavier, it was harder to breathe. "Mom." Lucas saw how upset his mother was. Her chest was going up and down fast, her eyes wild. He had never seen his mother in this way before, she almost scared him. He tried to touch her hand. But she refused it.

"Please tell me you two were smart enough to use a condom." Hesitation. "I don't know if we did." Karen's eyes turned from shocked to furious. "LUCAS SCOTT! Please tell me that that's not true." He shook his head. "I really don't know, it all happened so fast. And …" Karen cut her son off. "When had you planned to tell me about it?!" Lucas didn't know what to say. "I wanted to tell you, but I just didn't know how and when. I didn't want to upset you after all what happened." "And what do you think you're doing now Lucas? And when, where and how did it happen anyway? I hope you realize that this is serious Lucas, especially since you're with Brooke." Lucas swallowed his tears away. "I know, I know. I messed up!" Karen saw how her son was fighting against his tears, she began to feel again. Gently she touched his cheek. "Lucas." She said softly. "Maybe it's my fault too." Karen whispered. "I lost connection with your feelings since Keith dead, I putted all the blame on you and you also were broken. I shouldn't ..." Lucas pulled her mom in for a tight hug. It was the first real form of affection since Keith's dead. "No it's not your fault. It's mine, if should have my head cleared up. And I didn't."

Silence was back there, making it harder to breathe when the atmosphere turned colder. Lucas wondered why was his life full of silence. Why was it always there, making everything harder, more complicated, more hesitating, more … not the way they should be. Lucas watched his mother. As little boy he had promised himself that he wouldn't hurt her, or make her life more complicated than it was. From the day he was born, he had known that he shouldn't been here, that he wasn't as wanted as any other child. He knew he had failed so many times before, but at this moment, he couldn't shut her out any longer. Shutting her out wasn't making it any better, only worse, and she had the right to know what happened a while ago. What happened between him and Peyton.

"Mom, I'm going to tell you everything what happened. Why I did things, or said things, why I let them happen." He took a deep breath while he closed his eyes, and than the words that had been locked up in his mind for so long, too long finally, came out.

"Listen, I'm going to tell you everything from the beginning. It all started during the shooting …" Karen interrupted her son. "Why did you want to save her so bad anyway?" Her voice spoke, bitter. "Please mom." He begged. "Let me tell you what happened, and you can ask me questions afterwards." Karen nodded.

"When I found Peyton in the library, I was so scared, she was bleeding so heavy and how she spoke, I really though she wouldn't make it. And we waited and waited, hoping for the situation to change, but when it didn't, Peyton said something to me. She practically confessed to me she still loves me. Not like a friend, but really love me. And after that she kissed me, I was so overwhelmed by what happened, I didn't pull away from her and let her doing it. At that moment, something broke inside of me, suddenly I couldn't wait any longer, I needed to get her out of that place. I had wait a little longer but when she fell unconscious and knew it was time to save her from the dead that was about to take her away from me." Lucas took a deep breath. "I had to save her, after she confessed her feelings, I had. It wouldn't be fair, I was obligated. Her confession had to mean something."

Karen and Lucas' eyes met each others. Lucas could read the name Brooke in her eyes. "And I thought I could live with the fact she still loved me. I thought I could live with the fact that she still loved me, but that I loved Brooke, like it always had been. I didn't feel anything similar for her, I believed I loved Brooke and that Peyton couldn't change that fact. But then it all changed."

A few minutes passed by with words, Lucas still tried to find a way to tell his mother about what happened next, he knew that she would feel responsible for it.

"And after Keith's funeral, I became so sad, my world had turned black. Nobody I could talk to, the secret I had with Peyton. I couldn't turn to Brooke, because she wouldn't understand me and I didn't want to talk to you because the wound I've made with Keith's dead was just not ready to heal. So I went to Peyton's house and found her resting in her bedroom. First we talked, but then, something in my head broke. Like a house build with cards, you pull one away, and it collapsed. My mind collapsed on that evening, I kissed her and almost forced her to say that she loved me. First Peyton tried to push me away and talk to me, telling me I should go home or to Brooke, that I didn't want this and I was just confused. But I didn't listen to her, only to what my heart said that moment."

Lucas swallowed. "But we both broke down, and we had sex. And the next morning I woke up, I left her a note. I didn't want to be there when she woke up, I felt so guilty. And since then, she shut me practically out of her life, she won't talk to me, or let me be close to her, she shuts everyone out, even her dad. I've made her this way, I made her a girl that only trusts her walls. It's my fault because I can't give back what she gives me. And the worst thing about the guilt is, I don't know which girl I love the most. Brooke or Peyton." A few tears made tracks on his cheeks while Lucas finished his last sentence. "I always thought that you weren't over Peyton, but since you were with Brooke, I thought you finally had left Peyton behind." Lucas looked at the ground. "I guess I didn't." Karen hugged her son which was crying. The two preferred silence for a while, but Karen broke it off because it was during too long.

"So the lines you wrote, they aren't about Brooke but they are about your feelings for Peyton." Karen began to see the whole puzzle. Lucas nodded, with his thumbs, he wiped away his bitter tears.

"Who do you think you love the most?" Karen asked her son. Lucas looked at her, his eyes full with tears. "I don't know, I love Brooke I know that. But there's something about Peyton, for her I always had a special spot in my heart left, and there was a fire for her left there, just a little flame, but now, I feel it is growing. And what if it beats the fire I have for Brooke?"

Now confessions are made, feelings are appraised. But what if games are about to play and unexpected things are going to happen?


	10. Unpredictable

Unpredictable (It's Too Late To Run By Now)

**Unpredictable (It's Too Late To Run By Now)**

"Gosh I missed you so much P.Sawyer." Brooke hugged the blond girl before her, Brooke smiled cheerfully and Peyton tried to do the same. "Dejesus, I'm so glad that bandage finally is off, so we could go shopping."

Brooke and Peyton stood in the middle of Peyton's room. Brooke threw all the bags on the floor. She smiled and began to unpack them, more than ten packs, when hers were finally empty, she began to unpack Peyton's, who only had three bags.

"Peyton, you're freak, you only bought black clothing. I guess in the whole mall, there is not one black Emily The Strange-shirt left!" Peyton protested. "I bought a red wristband." And threw it to Brooke. "Well it says: 'If I Only Had a Heart'. Peyton that scares me even more than spiders do, why are you always buying creepy stuff like that? That's so depressing!" Peyton closed her eyes and fell back on the bed, she turned away from Brooke. Brooke realised she had hurt her best friend, she knew that it was just a part of Peyton. The hurt part, and it was always going to be there, so she better was carefully with her, it was not Peyton's fault that everything went wrong and she needed a way to express herself.

Quickly she jumped on the bed and sat down on the spot next to her. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. It's just after the shooting, you changed so much. And I want my old P.Sawyer back." Peyton turned around and looked into the sad eyes of her friend. Brooke pulled Peyton closer to her. "I want my old friend back, the one who laughs, and the one who did crazy things, the one who listened to creepy music." Peyton smiled. "She is still here, somewhere, or at least her creepy music is." Peyton stood up and walked into her closet with all her music. She picked out an album and let the music fill her bedroom.

Brooke stood before the mirror, showing her cloths. "Gosh, love this dress. It's short, and it accentuates all my good points and it's red, hot red. Lucas is going to love it, he is going to rip it from my body. Actually I hope so. Since Keith died we haven't had sex since, I'm so horny!" She complained and pouted. She turned around to Peyton and saw the hurt look in Peyton's eyes. Brooke shut her mouth and walked up to Peyton. "Hey Peyton, there is a guy for you out there, just be patient, he'll come around someday." Brooke didn't have an idea why Peyton's look was so dark. It was black from the guilt she had to carry with her.

Time passed by, Brooke and Peyton were talking, trying to win back the time they lost since Peyton had to stay home for her recovery. And at a point in their long and girly conversation they crashed on the subject BOYS. They both lay down on her bed and started at the doors where the boys' names were written. Peyton didn't want to talk about it, but she didn't want to get Brooke suspicious, so she gave into the subject.

"Come on Peyton, you're blond, skinny, hot and steamy and you have to be horny with no-one around. Are you sure you haven't had any booty-calls the last few weeks?" She teased Peyton. Peyton shook her head. "No I haven't, I swear B.Davis." Brooke laughed. "I so don't believe you!" She yelled and jumped off the bed and ran thought the room. "Somewhere there needs to be a used condom or something." She turned around and looked to Peyton. "Or some thrilling and sizzling note that says: 'Peyton, you were amazing baby. I love to hear you groan my name over and over again. Whenever you're lonely, call me, and I'll be there to please you! Sexy Love from Your Secret Lover!'" Peyton made the noise like she had to throw up, Brooke looked up. "What's wrong Peyton?" And Peyton began to laugh hysterical. "Brooke, that's so disgusting! You know that I'm not the owner of notes like that."

Brooke stuck her tongue out. "I know you have P.Sawyer, you're the ex of Nathan Scott! And Nathan in his old days was naughty and horny all the time. You were horny also all the time and you two just skipped classes to make out and to end up in his car having sex, while you two actually should have been in class for every boring hour full with stupid notes to learn from with your tests." Suddenly Brooke face got her famous 'Brooke-has-an-idea-and-you're-so-screwed'-look. She ran to Peyton's pedestal cupboard. "You always keep your naughty stuff in there, I know." She pulled out the drawer and began to search through the stuff in there. "Found!" She yelled and she showed the note in her hands. She opened the note and read it. Peyton's heart began to beat fast and when she looked into Brooke's shocked eyes, the music went off ...


	11. It Wasn't Meant To Happen

It Wasn't Meant to Happen

**It Wasn't Meant to Happen**

Silence was never this scary in daylight with Brooke around. Brooke's cheery eyes were not longer cheery, there was a endless dark look in the brunette's eyes. Silence getting stretched out, the two girls kept looking into each others eyes. Not a single word was spoken, not a blink of an eye, not a gasp.

Nothing at all. Without words, the lines of the note flashed before their eyes.

Peyton knew that the hell could burst out any second, and it would leave destruction as far as your gaze accorded you to look. Peyton couldn't bear the silence that filled her bedroom for minutes.

"It wasn't meant to happen Brooke." "But it did." Brooke screamed, the safe silence was broken, and it would not repair anytime soon. "I'm sorry Brooke. I REALLY am sorry, I am ..." Brooke stepped closer to Peyton. "Shut your mouth Peyton Sawyer, you selfish bitch!" Peyton swallowed before continuing, hesitation.

"I said I AM SORRY Brooke, what do I need to do to make it up to you." Peyton could feel the tears welling up in her eyes. "First, stop saying YOU'RE SORRY, because you're not! Two, forget I was ever your friend and three! Stay the hell out of my life you selfish, broody crackwhore!"

They were just an inch away from each other. Faster than either of them could blink, Brooke slapped Peyton hard. Peyton could feel how her left eye began to swell up, pain dripping into her body. In reflex Peyton pushed Brooke away, it was so forcefully that Brooke fell over a shoebox that Peyton accidentally left on her bedroom floor. Brooke smacked on the ground, a load cry escape from her mouth, the mouth were just seconds before, had spoken deflowering words.

Peyton immediately, without even thinking, rushed over to Brooke, she kneeled down next to her. It looked like she was about to help her, but then she slapped Brooke across her face, in pure anger, she hit her on the right eye. Peyton gasped heavy and uncontrollable. "Now ... leave." She whispered, her voice scarp as a knife, cutting into the two girls hearts. Brooke stood up and ran out of the house, tears on her face. It was about seconds when the door fell in lock with a loud smash.

Peyton fell down on her bed closing her eyes. 'I so screwed up!' That was the only thought in her tired and guilty mind. She opened her eyes again and looked at a picture of Brooke and herself smiling, having fun, when it was just them, and no Lucas that separated them. She grabbed something from her pedestal cupboard and threw it to the picture. The frame fell, the glass shattered, just like her friendship with Brooke.

Was this the end, the end of a beautiful friendship?

It was already after dinner when Lucas heard someone walking on his porch. A few seconds later, his girlfriend stood in his doorway. Her brown hair wild, not so properly as normal, her make-up had made dirty tracks on her cheeks, her eyes were furious, her clothes crumbled. How she stood there, all the things that were not 'Brooke' about her, it scared Lucas. There was something wrong, he could almost smell it.

"What happened to you pretty girl?" Lucas rushed over to her when he saw the black eye. Touching her arm but she rejected him. He stood there, just looking perplex, not getting what was happening. First there was silence, but then she burst out. "Well, the whore you slept with punched me a few house ago. And don't call me pretty girl, you fucking bastard!" Brooke pushed Lucas furiously away from her side. "What?" Lucas looked confused to Brooke. "What are you talking about?" Brooke stepped back to Lucas, threatening. "Like you don't know, you bastard! You slept with Peyton!" Lucas could hear the alarm bells in his head, they were ringing loud. Warning!

'She knew? She knew? How could she know it? God help me, she knows?' He thought. "Well, Casanova, what do you have to say now?" Lucas couldn't bring a word out, what could he say, she had caught him, and now there was no way out, not even one runaway available. Why did he always have the right words in his head, and not is mouth?

"I wasn't thinking with my head Brooke!" Lucas shouted. "Well, that I could have told you too." Looking to his waist. "Obliviously your brain was in your dick at the moment you slept with her!" Brooke turned around before looking back at Lucas. Her voice reflecting her disbelief. "She was my best friend, and she acts like a whore. You two had been sneaking around behind my back once. And I've forgive to the two of you. Why actually? To stab my back twice? Why did you did it, and why with her? She's a crackwhore, she screws up everyone who get close to here. No wonder her daddy isn't her to be with her the biggest time of the year, because he knows it!"

Lucas could feel the anger running through his veils. The words that Brooke spoke, pulling Peyton to pieces, like it all was the poor girl's fault, like she was the biggest bitch on the block. The fire he had for Peyton began to grow, flames became bigger, higher, stronger. Lucas' breath grew heavy, he was struggling, trying to control himself. He knew if he didn't do that, he would hurt Brooke not only mental but also physical. Then would the language of his strong and angry body take control over his mind that told him to keep everything as calm as possible.

"Like you are a saint Brooke!" His anger made his voice turn dark and deep. "Well I was drunk when I slept with Chris, and you know that!" Brooke shouted. "Doesn't make it better Brooke!" Lucas trembled from the aggression in his body. "Back to the point Luke, you slept with Peyton, and you even weren't drunk." "I was drunk of sorrow, Brooke, and you knew that too!" Brooke shook her head. "It was different, I was lonely, and you weren't there, you were angry at me. And ..." Lucas cut her off. "Why did I actually forgive you for sleeping with Chris?" "Because you love me!" "And now, I'm not so sure, I do" The verbal fight expired in just the blink of an eye. Brooke expression went shocked. Silence fell back in his place, but it was a different kind of silence. It was silence, sharp and cutting, words still flew around without being spoken. Brooke's eyes began to well up, tears getting to the surface, a quiet sob. She shook her head heavy, tears making tracks on her face.

Lucas shook his head, closed his eyes and for the first time in a while, it was clear what he had to say. "This is over Brooke. Us." Brooke shook her head, she began to cry harder, but Lucas just stood there, watching her. Silence taking control. Brooke walked to Lucas, trying to hug him, but he blew her off. "I mean it Brooke. Us, it wasn't meant to happen."

And after those words, Brooke turned away from Lucas and a few seconds later his door fell in lock. And with that ... his fire for Brooke was put out ...


	12. If My Runaway Is You?

If My Runaway Is You (What Now

**If My Runaway Is You (What Now?)**

Lucas was restless, since Brooke left his room crying, he didn't know what to do or how to act. His mother wasn't at home, so he couldn't talk to her. But he needed to speak about what happened or else ..., he just needed to get away from this place. There were just too much memories in this room know. Bad memories, the ones he didn't want in his mind right now.

He felt like he was numb or something. The events of the last couple of hours, days, weeks, months, years. Suddenly, he could fell the weight of it on his shoulders. He felt like he couldn't carry it around anymore. That it was suddenly too much to handle. He needed to talk to somebody, and soon, before he broke down again.

Pain was cutting him inside, he wanted to cry. But really cry, cry until all his tears were shed, he wanted to cry everything away. But he knew he couldn't.

When he looked outside for the first real time tonight, it was almost dark. The sky was beautifully mixed. It was bright blue sky, there were beautiful dark blue stripes through it. But if you looked further, you could see the black of the night already coming in. Lucas took his famous grey hoodie and left his house. Walking, he made is way to the cemetery of Tree Hill. The place where Keith was buried, for now and forever.

That was the thing he had done the last few weeks, if he needed to talk, he rushed over to the cemetery and talked to his uncle Keith's grave. It relieved him, he wanted so desperate to feel like Keith was still there. Also he wasn't, but for Lucas, he still was around, looking after him, in a very strange way maybe.

Lucas' mind played around with memories on his trip to the dark place. Memories he had shared with Keith. Happy memories, from his mom and Keith and him as a happy family. The special band they shared, the band so strong after all. The band that made them a real and loving family. The family, that after seventeen long, difficult but also good and cherished years, they finally would become, ..., if that bullet wasn't drilled into his innocent body.

The sky was turned into dark grey when Lucas finally stood at the grave from Keith. His grave was grey like stones, hard, cold. Lucas suddenly missed him so much. He needed Keith now, when he had so many questions. Unanswered questions, questions who only found an answer in the wise words that Keith spoke.

He looked down at the stone. Lucas was so lost in his thought, that he even didn't feel the rain that fell out of the sky. It was a few single drops of water that fell on the earth. But just enough to draw Lucas attention. Confused he looked around, first he didn't realise where he actually was. When he turned around, something draw is attention, a silhouette from some standing by another grave.

Because of the darkness, Lucas couldn't tell who it was, but the figure that was drawn in the night, Lucas recognized. And the grave it was standing on was a huge hint. Lucas knew by hard, it was the grave of Anna Sawyer.

Without any hesitation he yelled. "Peyton?!" No response. Lucas walked away from his uncle's gravestone. "Peyton!" Lucas yelled again. Louder this time, making sharp tracks into the nocturnal sky. And suddenly, the silhouette started running quickly. "Peyton Sawyer?!" Lucas wanted to go after her, but then the sky began to cry. Cold, wet raindrops fell as tears on the earth. It was so heavy all at once, that Lucas needed to hide away.

First the rain went first much heavier, but then it stopped as abrupt as it was started. Slowly his shoes made footprints in the fresh mud left on the ground. Lucas went back to Keith's grave, he smiled and pressed a kiss to the wet stone. "Bye Keith, I'll be back soon." He whispered. "I love you." He stood up and walked over to the grave from Anna Sawyer. Yeah, Peyton had been there, he knew. A bouquet lay on the grave, fresh white and red roses.

Lucas smiled, Peyton felt it too. This hard world, how hard it was to miss someone you loved so much. The one that took care of you for a long and important time. Lucas always admired Peyton for her strength to fight this world alone, but that strength had made too, that she was an outsider. She was alone with her pain and sorrow. Now he even admired her even more, she had to deal with this miserable life for a long time now, and she was able to fight and beat what was bothering her. And he, he only, compared with her, had a taste from this miserable life. And he was blown away, how could she fight so long and so hard?

Lucas began on his long trip back, he was halfway when suddenly, out of the blue, the storm that had threatened the whole evening finally burst out. Lucas ran fast and when he finally stood still again, he realized he wasn't by his own porch, but by Peyton's. Fate was playing a dangerous game with him, and he was awarded.

Quietly he entered her house, he knew his way blindly. Soft and sad music came from upstairs, but downstairs, it was all a pool of endless dark. Careful, trying not to make any noise, he went upstairs. The door of Peyton's bedroom nearly closed, a little ray of light escaped out of her bedroom. Lucas couldn't help it but he first looked inside her room, to see what she was doing, instead of going in.

Peyton lay down on her bed, with her back to the door. Her body was trembling softly, Lucas assumed she was crying. Slowly he opened the door further.

"Hi Peyton." He said. Just these simple words made her stiffen. Lucas walked over to the bed and sat down next to her. Peyton didn't move, but Lucas knew she was awake. When after two minutes, Peyton hadn't move, Lucas stood up and walked around the bed to find Peyton laying there with her eyes wide open. Lucas smiled relieved and stroked her cheek. "Hi Peyton." He repeated. And then he noticed she had also a black eye.

"What happened to you?" Lucas was amazed and shocked. "Did Brooke do that?" Peyton bit on her lower lip and nodded. She was afraid how he would react. "Let me see it." He commanded her. Peyton shook her head a little. "Come on Peyton. Let me examine it for a second. Have you used anodyne ointment or something?" Peyton shook her head again. Lucas forced Peyton to sit. "Looks like she really had you good this time." He softly spoken while he held her cheek still so he could look at the black eye. Peyton tried to smile. "It's not that bad." She said softly. Lucas sighted while he shook his head. "Do you have ice or ointment? Something to take away the swelling." She nodded. "In the bathroom." Lucas stood up and went to her bathroom, in a few minutes he was back with the ointment.

Careful he smeared the anodyne ointment on Peyton's left eye. Lucas began to laugh. "Why are you laughing?" Peyton asked, while she tried to hide the fact Lucas was hurting her a little. "Well, you punched Brooke a black eye, but on the right." Peyton felt uncomfortable. "Why are you here anyway?" Lucas swallowed. "Well, ... Brooke and I broke up actually." "God, it's my fault." Peyton cried. She moved her face so heavy that Lucas accidentally pushed too hard on her face. "Auw!" She yelled. "I am sorry Peyton." He said quickly and hugged her. "It's my fault Lucas, I am so sorry, it's my entire fault." Lucas tried his best to soothe Peyton. "It's not." He whispered and stroked her back. "But one little thing, how did she found out, did you tell her?" Peyton still wondered why he wasn't angry. "I didn't tell her, she found the note you left." Peyton whispered. The puzzle in Lucas' head began to fit.

Silence found his way to the room and filled the space between Lucas and Peyton. "Why are you not angry at me?" Peyton asked afraid for the answer. Lucas smiled. "Because I can't be angry with you Peyton. It's not your fault, I realized something tonight. Brooke and me, it wasn't meant to happen. I forgave her so much, and she even didn't want to listen to my story. It was the best for the both of us to break up." Lucas looked into her green eyes. "How did she take it?" "Not so good." Lucas answered. Peyton wept away a few left tears. "I feel really sorry for you Lucas." He smiled and hugged her. When it was almost midnight, they still were talking.

"You really should be going Lucas. It's midnight, and your mom is alone." Lucas smiled by Peyton's worry. "It's okay, when I went to the toilet, I phoned her and told her I would stay here tonight. Since the storm is still heavy, it's best I stay here. And she is by an old friend of hers. And she stays there to sleep. Is that okay with you?" Peyton nodded, she was happy he would stay. She didn't want to be alone tonight. They talked a little longer but Peyton was so tired she almost fell asleep talking. So they both went to sleep.

Stirring Peyton woke up from her sleep. She felt a warm hand caressing her cheek. A warm body was near to her, had his arms wrapped around her waist. She felt so drowsy, that she didn't do anything. She just lay there with her eyes closed. And she felt like she was dreaming. The warmth against her body, the soft hand, lips soft pressed on hers. It all felt like a sweet dream, a dream she had dreamed so many times before. Her dream that showed her longing need for desire, passion, protection and love.

It was until she felt someone's tongue glided between her slightly parted lips and two strong arms that were pulling her closer to the soothing body, trying to deepen the contact, she opened her eyes. The darkness that surrounded her, and the soft moonlight that lighted up her room a little, showed a blond boy lying next to her. Quickly she pulled away, a sound of protest left Lucas mouth. It looked like he was waking up too, but a different kind of waking up. It was waking up from his sub consciousness.

Quickly she deprived herself from his embrace and ran out of her bedroom, leaving a confused and barely awake Lucas alone. Lucas moaned, not knowing what overcame him. With big steps Peyton ran from the stairs, breathless she leaned against the wall of her living room, softly cursing. A few minutes later, Peyton heard Lucas coming downstairs. His footsteps were slow, but he was coming closer. She knew there was no place to hide, so she just kept leaning against the wall, trying to found a way to react on what happened just minutes ago.

Lucas walked into her dark living room, quiet and slow. First he looked around, it was so dark he didn't see her. But then he heard the soft noise of her breathing. Slow but sure, Lucas walked over to where the noise of the breathing was coming from.

"Peyton?" He said, reaching out his hand into the darkness. Knowing Peyton was just standing an arm-length away from him. First Peyton didn't know if she should refuse his hand or not. But Lucas' grabbed her hand and pulled her a little closer. "I'm sorry for what happened before Peyton, I ..." Peyton cut him off. Doubting what to say, his actions had been pretty clearly. He had kissed her and touched her like she always dreamed. So soft and gentle, almost loving. His true feelings coming through with his actions.

And now, as she had the chance to shout it all out. The chance to tell him, she loved him and wanted to be with him. Like he had showed with is caressing. Suddenly she couldn't do it anymore. The feelings were there, but not the words to say it. She should have said: "Lucas, it's okay for you to do that. Because I want you to do it, because I love you. I love YOU Lucas Scott."

But instead of that she said: "It's okay Lucas. It's all okay." She spoke fast. "You're confused and hurt now things are done with Brooke. And you woke up besides me and without thinking you thought I was her. So you kissed me." She shrugged her shoulders. Lucas wanted to say what he really thought. That his heart was full with love for her, that he actually was in love with her. But that he just realized it now. He know that was lame, but it was the truth.

Brooke had made him see that. If Brooke hadn't spoke about Peyton like she had done. Pulling her into more than thousand pieces. Lucas would be feeling different. But Brooke had made him see that it wasn't only their fault. That Brooke had a big role is this progress too. She was the one that pulled him and Peyton apart in the first place. She was ...

Peyton interrupted his thoughts. "Let's go sleep again Lucas. It didn't mean anything right? And I'm so tired." Lucas nodded and didn't fight back against her. He knew that it wouldn't make any difference right now, it was clear she didn't feel the same way.

With the silence of the stormy and dark night that surrounding them, they went upstairs again. They both crawled back into her bed. Lucas had offered to sleep on the floor, but Peyton made it clear that he could sleep next to her again.

"If you try to kiss me again, well, than I'll make you sleep on the floor by myself." She laughed. Why she actually let him sleep next to her was totally different. Peyton ached for Lucas besides her. To feel his warm and strong body next to her. To let her tired head rest on his chest that rose and fell, and she could feel his heart beat in his own mysterious rhythm.

Lucas lay on the right side of the bed and Peyton on the left side. But after a few minutes, Peyton crawled to Lucas' side and lay her head down on his chest. "Peyton?" He asked confused, trying to move himself away. "Don't be stranger Luke, I figured out that you're not going to kiss me again. So ..." She pressed herself closer to him. "It's okay. We've slept together in one bed so many times before, and nothing actually happened back then. Expect the last time, but that was different, wasn't it?" She talked so lightly about it, that Lucas' heart was hurting.

How could she do like nothing important happened that night? A new wound had appeared in his heart when she had said earlier tonight that he assumed she was Brooke. How could she? She was not Brooke. Not anything like her. Gladly!

Slowly he laid his arm around Peyton so she lay comfortable. And Peyton fell asleep after a little while. Lucas watched her, heard her steady breath, felt the warmth of her slender body. And after almost an hour, Lucas fell asleep too.

Wondering about the new secrets, problems and confrontations they had to meet by the dawn.


	13. There's Something About a War

There's Something About a War

**There's Something About a War**

Sunlight fled through the windows of Peyton's bedroom while she opened her eyes to meet the face of a new day that introduced itself to her. She slowly stretched herself out while she gasped to let her sleep go away. But suddenly she felt an arm around her small waist, the arm pressed her against another body. She was amazed when she saw Lucas sleeping next to her. His face was so peaceful, she couldn't do about it, but she wondered what he was dreaming about. Was it her, he dreamed about? She wished it was true, she wanted nothing more than being the central thought of his dreams.

Careful she shifted herself so she could release herself from Lucas' hold. But that wasn't that easy, every time she tried to move away, he pulled her closer to his body. After trying a while, she figured out it was stupid to try more, even in his sleep, Lucas was much stronger than she was. And the feeling of him so close to her, it wasn't that bad, she actually wished it would never end. She closed her eyes again and was immediately embraced by the arms of sleep.

The bright lightning of sun high in the sky woke her up. When she didn't feel the warmth of Lucas' body against hers, she opened her eyes to discover he was gone. Peyton groaned and let the sunshine wake her up. There was not a clue that could tell Lucas had been there. No note left, like he did the last time. She was a sort of relieved, not finding a note or something. If she thought on yesterday, and everything what happened. Peyton was pretty sure she didn't want to see any regretting words scratched onto a tiny piece of paper.

She stood up and went downstairs. When she entered the kitchen, she saw a note left on the table. Quickly she ran over to table and read it.

_Look into the fridge _

_xxx Lucas_

Peyton smiled and did what the note said. On the middle shelve there stood a tumbler with fresh orange juice. She was amazed and took the tumbler from the shelve and placed it on the kitchen table. On the back of the glass there was another note.

_There's something for you on the counter (it's in a box)_

_xxx Lucas_

Peyton noticed a red plastic box on the counter. She walked over to the box and opened it. The smell of waffles overwhelmed the spot where she stood. Peyton closed her eyes and smiled. She picked up the box and found another little piece of paper on the bottom of it.

_And last but not least, a little surprise for you in the drawers of the fridge_

_xxx Lucas_

Peyton did again what the note commanded. In the right drawer there was chocolate spread and whipped cream. And in the left Peyton found fresh, juicy, red strawberries. Peyton was amazed, Lucas making breakfast for her. She thought it was weird, but also, she found it, in some way romantic, but she knew it wasn't meant that way. But she didn't care about it because it felt good, knowing Lucas took care. He felt more than just friendship for, that he proved last night. And sure, she felt more for him than just friendship. But at some point, she didn't know how to tell him. She was in love with him, and she finally admitted her true feelings to her dad. Told him, she would no longer lie and hide away. And now she had to change to tell the world 'I'm in love with Lucas Scott, I love Lucas', she couldn't do it. Peyton still was afraid to get hurt again, that after all, he wouldn't feel the same way she did. That he would get scared if they end up together. Because she was so complicated and not so easy to live with. Peyton had just so much history, for someone of her age, it was sometimes too much history to deal with. She had more history behind her back than the most people twice her age.

She enjoyed her breakfast while she read the last note that Lucas had left on the box of the strawberries. It said:

_I hope you enjoy your breakfast_

_I'll see you later_

_Love Lucas_

She smiled happy and her mind was filled with daydreaming. And when she was having breakfast with a wishful thinking mind, Lucas was on his way to Haley's apartment. He needed to talk to her, about what happened. She needed to know what happened, why it happened, how he felt. Lucas needed that conversation with her, her familiar voice telling him that everything was going to be okay, but that it needed some time. When he wanted to rang the doorbell, something caught his attention. Through the window he saw two girls laid on the couch. It was Brooke and Haley.

Brooke lay in Haley's arms, crying like a baby. Lucas could see how Haley softly whispered soothing words to Brooke while she stroked the brunette's hair. Lucas could feel anger growing in a ball. The heat inside his heart grew with every movement of Haley's lips. Lucas moved closer to the window, it was open, just a little, but enough to hear the exchanging of words between the two girls.

"I was in love with him you know." Brooke sobbed. "I've gave him everything, he didn't miss anything, didn't he? He had my body, my brain and almost whole my heart." She wiped a few tears away. "And then ... And then he slept with that whore, she sat out her traps and he walked into it blindly!" Haley kept stroking Brooke's hair. "I thought Lucas was smarter than that, but I guess, he's just like any other guy. First thinking with their 'brain' between their legs, and than they think with the brain in their head." Lucas felt the anger that was almost unbearable. How they spoke about him, how they spoke about Peyton. "Brooke, be glad it's over. Peyton is crazy for real, if Lucas want to be with her, instead of being with you. Well he is stupid. He should be in an institute for crazy people with her."

And Lucas couldn't take it anymore. Furious he entered the apartment. "You bitch." He screamed, pointing to Brooke. "Lucas?!" The girls said at the same moment. His eyes went dark. "You tiny selfish bitch." Lucas yelled. "Lucas, stop it." Haley said when Lucas made his way to the couch. "Brooke you selfish little bitch! How do you even dare to say that?"

He kept walking closer, and then he looked at Haley. "And you, I thought you were my best friend, and you stabbed my back!" "Shut up Lucas, go away!" She screamed, this threatening person didn't look like the Lucas Scott she knew, but he didn't do what she commanded. "God, Brooke, I can't believe why I actually loved you. You're the whore, not Peyton, you've slept with half Tree Hill High! You're one of the main reasons why she gets in so much trouble! You ..." He said while stepping closer to Brooke and Haley, the both girls stiffen. "You ... You ..." He was about to punch her when his threatening finger into a fist, but than, out of the blue, felt Lucas two strong arms around his chest and felt himself pushed into a wall seconds later. Nathan's face was just a breath away. Nathans left arm was pressed against Lucas' chest, his right arm pinned up Lucas' hands above their heads. Lucas first tried to fight back. "Stop Lucas. You're going to do things you'll regret later!" He said and his hold became much stronger. "I'll regret it if I don't punish that slut for what she said about Peyton!" Lucas screamed furious and his head was red from the heat of his rage.

Desperately Lucas tried to push Nathan away again, but Nathan was strong enough to keep his older brother under control. "Think about Keith, Lucas! He doesn't want you to do this!" All of a sudden, a unexpected scream caught everyone's attention. Peyton stood in the doorway. Her face full of shock, with an open mouth and wide eyes, she stared at everyone.

"Peyton!" Lucas yelled when the tears began to flow over her cheeks. "Peyton!" He yelled again when she didn't do anything but stare while she was crying. Lucas pushed Nathan away from the first moment that he felt the grip of his younger brother weaken. "Peyton!" He screamed louder, but she was already gone. He turned around and his voice was so harsh and dark that it caused everyone cold shivers. "You better pray she's okay. Or otherwise ... you'll regret it later." And after those last words he ran away hoping to find Peyton anywhere near. And gladly there she stood, leaning against her car. Lucas wondered:

How long had she been there, how much had she heard? How much new pain would this cause her? And the most important, how is she going to deal with it and is she able to deal with all the pain much longer?


	14. When It All Falls Apart

When It All Falls Apart

_**Author's note: Hi, here I am again. First thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far, you all make me so happy. Also thanks for everyone who read and didn't review … So why this AN? Well, I kind of have a question/request to all of you. You probably all know that my first language isn't English but Dutch and I am only learning English in school. So, this school year is at its end (tomorrow I'll get my grades ) **__**and I am already freaking nervous) and so I can focus more on writing. The last year I have been writing my fics pure on my English feeling and without much thinking about the grammar, so what I want you to do … If there is something wrong in my grammar like tense use, or a fault I keep making and stuff, let me know. If you want to give critic on my writing style and/or aspects of the story. Let me know … I want to spend my summer improving my writing and you all could help me a lot with that. Already thanks, now you can enjoy the chapter. I love all of you … (PS: if you have ideas for the story, let me know!)**_

**When It All Falls Apart**

In silence Lucas and Peyton enjoyed each others company. Peyton's head rested in Lucas' lap while he stroked her beautiful blond hair. There wasn't so much need for words at this moment. They both were still impressed about what happened by the apartment. Soft music played in the background. 'With Tired Eyes, Tired Minds, Tired Souls, We Slept' from Explosions In The Sky was enough to draw a quite peace between them. More than twelve minutes of instrumental silence. And they both enjoyed it.

"I think we should go and get your car." Lucas said soft after a while and he looked into Peyton's green eyes. She nodded. "Possibly." She answered. Peyton's car was still by the apartment. After the big fight, Lucas had found Peyton so shaky and upset that she wasn't able to drive, so Lucas drove her home with his car. Peyton stood up from the bed, took her red jacket, she wore on their last road trip and took her car keys and they were ready to leave.

"Ready Miss Sawyer?" Lucas said so polite that Peyton began to laugh. "Yeah ready." She answered and took Lucas by the arm. When they were on the beginning of the stairs, Peyton interrupted. "You can go the car Lucas, but I really need to use the bathroom." She said and ran away before he even could react. Lucas went downstairs and waited for her in the car. Five minutes came and went by, still no Peyton. After ten minutes Lucas being alone in his car, he began to wonder what caused her to take some much time. He was afraid something had happened to her, so as fast as he could he made his way back into the house.

"Peyton!" He yelled while he ran up the stairs. No answer. "Peyton!" He ran into her bedroom, suddenly he heard the toilet flush, Peyton walked out of her bathroom. The first thing she saw when she opened the door were Lucas' worried blue eyes. "Are you okay?" He asked, Peyton's skintone was pale. "Yes, just feeling a little dizzy. Nothing serious." She smiled the issue away. "Don't look so worried, it's nothing Lucas, I'm fine now. Come on, let's go and get my car."

"Thank you for the wonderful breakfast this morning Lucas. It was delicious." Peyton said after a while. Lucas looked away from the road and into Peyton's eyes. "It was all my pleasure." He said smiling. Silence returned but Lucas needed to talk about Peyton what happened today, by Haley's apartment.

"How long had you stand there?" Lucas asked while he stopped for the red traffic light. "Where?" Peyton asked, trying to ignore the subject. "Peyton, by Haley. How much did you actually hear?" Lucas looked at the blond-haired girl besides him, but she stared outside through the window. "I heard enough." She whispered. "Peyton? You need to tell me what you've heard? What have you seen?" She swallowed, trying to swallow away her upcoming tears. "Peyton?" He touched her hand. "You can tell me, you know that. Right Peyton?" She nodded, she could better tell him what she had seen, because he wouldn't find peace before she had told it.

"I was there from the moment you began to verbally attack Brooke and Haley." She bit on her lower lip, waiting for his reaction. "Okay, that's fine." He answered. "Lucas, why did you do it? You don't have to fight with Haley about me. I'm not worth it to risk your friendship with her. You've been friends for so long, I don't want to be the reason that it wouldn't work out." "Peyton. They said horrible things about you and about me. They didn't deserve better then that. And my friendship with you means the world to me Peyton. I won't let them say things about you like that." "But what did they say Luke? And by the way, your friendship with Haley is important to you too, I know that. What did they say do terrible, that you lost control?" Lucas looked away and back to the road. "I don't want to repeat it Peyton. But the most important thing is. We've got each other, and I'll always be there for you and I'll protect you." Peyton's smiled a little. "Thank you Luke." She whispered. "That means to world to me."

Lucas stopped by the parking of the apartments, they stepped out of the car, but they just kept leaning against it. "Why were you there Peyton? It's not my business, but ..." Peyton broke him off. "I went to see Nathan actually. Nathan and I have become closer again after his car accident. We finally begin to appreciate each other as friends. And it's pretty great, us being friends. Now we finally share this 'trust', you know? Everything we hadn't in our relationship back then, we have now, and it feels good. Haley turned Nathan in to the kind of guy I always wanted him to be for me. But I wasn't strong enough to do it. I didn't want to fight that hard to change him, because I thought it was impossible for him to change. But I wasn't meant to do it, it was Haley, they are meant to be together. And my guy is out there, he told me, and I believe him, because he really is a good guy now. And I can trust him now, it's not anymore like it was when we were a couple."

She took a brief pause to breathe before she continued. "But I don't regret our relationship, it was good sometimes you know. In the beginning it was good, he was like my first real boyfriend. And the sex ... the sex it was amazing, it was wow, he knew how to please a woman, it was ..." Peyton saw the look on Lucas face. "Okay, you definitely don't want to hear that part, I guess." She said laughing, Lucas nodded. "Rather not, but if you want to tell about it, if that makes you feel better, than you should do it, than there is nothing that can stop you from doing that." She smiled. "No I'm going to hold that to myself, but thank you for being there for me Lucas, it really means a lot to me." Peyton wrapped his arms around him and wanted to press a soft kiss to his cheek. But Lucas suddenly turned his head a bit and her lips ended up on his. And it all was way too long for just a kiss between friends.

"Ow I'm so sorry Lucas." Peyton said, beginning to freak out. Lucas gently took her hands in his. "It's okay." He said smiling, he hold her close to his body. Wet drops began to fell out of the sky, asking for their attention. "I really think you should get your car now and I'll meet you by your house okay."

It was already evening, Lucas and Peyton were again in Peyton's room. For the second time that day they lay on her bed and listening to the music. It felt good, they both were daydreaming about one another. Imagining how it would be if they were together as a couple. But they didn't know that they had the same ideas on the same time.

"I think you should go to sleep Peyton, you look pale. Are you sure you're not sick?" Lucas asked while he heard her suffer next to him. "It's okay Lucas, just a little tummy ache." She said and crawled closer to him. "Stay with me tonight Lucas. I don't want to be alone. My dad is on a meeting, and he'll hear tonight where is next job is. I don't want to be alone when he tells me Lucas." He smiled. "It's okay Peyton. I'll stay."

It was midnight when Peyton woke up, she felt how Lucas arms were protective wrapped around her. She smiled and inhaled the smell of his hair. And suddenly she had that uncontrollable need to touch him. She didn't now why, but she felt the flames in her heart grow. Her fingers traced along his face, from his eyes to his noise, cheeks... lips. His velvet lips. Her fingertips rested there. He still was asleep, and wouldn't wake up anytime soon. She moved herself so her face was next to his. And then she pressed her lips lightly on his. She moaned and her arms pulled him closer to her. It was great to taste his lips. She wished, someday soon, that she could tell Lucas how she really felt, and hope that he would feel the same as her. That they could share a love so strong and loving and everlasting. Satisfied she closed her eyes and fell asleep again.

It was around 03.55 A.M. Lucas waked up to find out that Peyton wasn't sleeping in his embrace anymore. He was confused and sat up in the bed, and then he saw the light in her bathroom. He stood up and walked over to the door, he saw how Peyton sat before the toilet and how she threw up. Worried Lucas opened the door further and walked over to her. Peyton felt so bad and sick that she didn't notice he was in the same room as her. It was until Lucas bent down next to her and held her hair back with his one hand and rubbed her back with the other. "Sshh." He whispered tosoothe her, but she didn't stop. After some minutes she finally stopped vomiting, Lucas sat next to her and stroked her face. She was so pale, it really worried him. Her body was weak and tired, so Lucas picked her up and brought her to bed.

"Better?" He asked. She nodded. "Just a little dizzy." And Lucas began to think, and he putted every sign of Peyton illness after one another. First she stayed very long in her bathroom, then the tummy ache, now she had to throw up, and she was almost dizzy all the time. And it was now almost two months after they slept together, and he still didn't know if she was on birth control or if they used a condom. It couldn't be, all these signs, it couldn't be, he thought, she couldn't be pregnant.

He looked into Peyton's green eyes. "Can I ask you something?" He asked carefully. "Yeah, what's up Lucas?" She answered, pulling the sheets closer to her. "Are you ...?" He stopped. "What Lucas? Am I what?" He swallowed hard. "Are you pregnant?" And never Lucas had seen so fast someone's health turn around. She jumped out of the bed, her face intense red.

"How do you dare to ask me that? How do you even dare!" She shouted. "I'm so stupid! And I thought you cared about me! But that was a mistake, the only reason you are here with me and being so nice to me, is because you think I'm pregnant with your child!" She shook her head and fought against the bitter tears. "That's not true Peyton, it's ..." Lucas tried to say what his intentions really were. "You fucking bastard! Son of a bitch!" She screamed. "You're just like your dad!" That was the worst accusation he could possibly get, being compared to Dan made that he felt like a knife stabbing into his back. "No." She screamed. "You're even lower than him, you're much lower than Dan Scott, Lucas Scott!" No, this one was the worst he could ever get.

"Get out! Get out!" She yelled, but he didn't move. "Get out Lucas! Get out of MY HOUSE!" Her breath was heavy. "I'm not going Peyton. I didn't mean it like that, I'm just ..." "You're nothing bastard! NOTHING!" She walked over to a cupboard and took something out of it. She turned back to Lucas, an aerosol with the memo PEPPERSPRAY on it was readable. "Peyton, you don't mean it. You're not like this." He tried to soothe her. "So you think I didn't mean it, don't you? Well, watch this!" She pointed the spray to his eyes. "Okay, okay. I'll go. I'll go!" He stepped out of her room and left the house. After him, he heard how she locked every door behind his back.

A half hour later, Lucas still was in his car watching Peyton's bedroom window. The light was still on and he saw her move. He went to the backdoor but she had locked that one too, but that didn't stop him from knocking on it. "Peyton!" He yelled.

"Peyton, come downstairs! I need to talk to you!" But his voice got lost in the air. He kept knocking and yelling but she didn't answer him. Probably she was ignoring him, or her iPod stood way too loud. But than he heard loud music coming from upstairs. He recognized the ending of the song 'It Ends Tonight' of The All-American Rejects and then he heard the intro of their song 'Stab My Back', when lead singer Tyson screamed: "_Stab my back, it's better when I bleed for you_." Lucas went away, the cutting words still ringing in his ears.

How could he grow so close to her and lose her even more in just one day?


	15. Maybe Forgiveness Is Right Where You Fel

Maybe Forgiveness Is Right Where You Fell

**Maybe Forgiveness Is Right Where You Fell**

Lucas heard the world around him wake up, his mother footsteps on the floor of the kitchen. Water that was running out of the faucets in their house. The daily routine of his mother in the morning started up. He could tell by heart what was going to happen with every step she made. First she was going to bathroom, than she checked if there was any mail, after that she would make the biggest part of the breakfast and then she took a cup of coffee. And after doing all that, she walked up to his bedroom, like she did now.

"Lucas, sleeping time is over! Time to get up." She said while knocking on his bedroom door, she opened it a little so daylight lighted up his room. Like he had sleep, he didn't close an eye the hours after he came home. The angry tone of Peyton's voice, her pale skin and her upset face were the only thing he saw when he closed his eyes. Guilt was never this big, Lucas had hurt three, maybe four or even five people in just one day. Haley, Brooke and Peyton, he had hurt the most. And maybe he had hurt Nathan too, and Keith. Lucas wanted Keith to be proud, to show he had done a good job on earth. Raising him to the fine kid he had become. But if Lucas looked to himself now, there wasn't a trace of that kid in the proximity of his room.

Lucas still didn't show a sign of life, so Karen decided to go in his room and see what he was doing. "Come on Lucas get up, I know you hate Mondays, but that doesn't change the fact you need to get up." She said while opening the curtains. The sunlight made Lucas face visible. Two red, tired eyes with a guilty look, blond hair full with knots and a pale skin. "Ow." She reacted. "Are you okay?" She asked worried, walking over to his bed. Careful she laid a hand on his forehead. "You feel a little warm, do you feel sick?" Her hand stroked his cheek. "Sick of guilt maybe." He whispered, so quiet that Karen couldn't understand it. "What did you say honey?" She asked while stroking his hair. "I'm sick of guilt." He turned away from his mother and tried to push away the upcoming tears. "What do you mean?" Karen was confused. "I so fucked things up yesterday." His voice was broken, could see how her son was breaking down. She pushed away the sheets and crawled closer to him. "What happened Lucas?" He swallowed difficult. "I had a fight with Haley and Brooke yesterday and with Peyton." Karen frowned. "Okay, tell me about it." She said and Lucas began to tell everything for A to Z.

After Lucas had finished his story, Karen repeated what happened: "So my short version. You heard Brooke and Haley talk about Peyton and you. And they said awful things, you freaked out and began to verbal fight with them. Nathan stopped you before you would attack anyone. And suddenly Peyton was there, you went after her and spend the rest of the day with her. And in the evening she began sick. You slept by her because she asked you to, so she wouldn't be alone when her dad told her the news. You woke up and she was throwing up. And you asked her or she was pregnant and she freaked out on you. And you still don't know if she's pregnant." Lucas nodded. "Yeah, sort of." They both didn't say a word. Karen tried to think how Lucas felt. He had hurt the two girls he loved the most, and maybe one of the girls was carrying his child. She saw how he was hurting himself. He was beating up himself for everything that went wrong. She crawled under the sheets next to Lucas and held him he softly cried against her chest.

"Peyton honey?" Larry entered his daughter's room and saw her lying on the bed, dressed already. "Honey?" He saw her blood red eyes. "What's wrong?" He sat next to her and stroked her hair. "I don't want you to go again." She cried. He smiled. "It's okay Peyton. I'm back in six weeks, that's not that long. Just a little trip to Europe and I'll be home again. Don't you worry." She sobbed. "But still I don't want you to go away. I'm going to miss you so much." Larry pulled her in a hug and softly kissed her hair. "I'm going to miss you too honey, but I have to go. Besides you've got so much to do, hanging out with Brooke and Lucas and doing stuff." She felt like her heart was pulled out. She hadn't the courage to tell her dad what happened the other day and what happened the last week. She didn't want him to go, she would be alone, and there was nobody she could turn to right now. Brooke threw her out of her life, Haley was on Brooke's side and so would Nathan be on Haley's side and Peyton just had discouraged Lucas yesterday. This whole situation was a big mess, she just blew off everyone she loved.

When Peyton stood at the port, watching how her dad finished the last things he needed to do before going on board. He saw his daughter stand there and thought back to the sketch she made not so long ago. He walked over to her and hugged her, he felt wet drops soaking a spot on his shirt. "Peyton." He whispered. "I'll be back soon, don't cry, when I am back, we'll do plenty of things together. I'll make up for the time I've not been here." She looked at him, tears still in her eyes. "Come on sweetheart, I promise. And I am going to miss you too." He hugged her and then gave her a kiss on her cheek. He heard someone call his name, and he knew he had to go, and Peyton knew it too. Larry looked at his daughter, with his thumb he wiped her tears away. "I really need to go now. I'm going to miss you too." He kissed on top of her head. "Bye honey." He said and went on board. Ten minutes later the ship left the haven. "I love you Peyton" Her dad yelled, his voice flowed to her over the water and then the ship was out of her sight. And she returned to school.

School, the worst place you could be when you're depressed. Everyone pushing and yelling, making big deals out of nothing. Lucas ran down the hallway, he was almost too late. And when he finally entered his classroom, his met the angry eyes of his English teacher.

"Lucas Scott, you're late. What's your explanation?" The rest of the class waited until Lucas would answer, but would could he say. "Hey guys, I've been crying like a baby in my mother's arms because I have screwed up my own life." Wasn't the explanation he wanted to tell. "I have no explanation." Lucas mumbled and took place.

School was over, and Lucas hadn't spoken to anyone. Haley and Brooke had avoided him like the plague, and Nathan was too busy with basketball. The only words he had heard from Nathan were: "Dude, you can better fix this screwed up situation, because Haley isn't very happy right now and I guess that's your fault." And Peyton, well Lucas tried to talk to Peyton, but every time he came close to her, she found a way to get away without speaking to him.

Now he couldn't take it, he was at home and tried to figure out a way to dissolve everything. After making his homework Lucas couldn't take it anymore, he grabbed his cell phone and called Nathan. "Hi." He heard the voice of his younger brother. "Hi Nathan, I have to ask you something?" Lucas said fast, wanting this to end soon. "Yeah, drop the question Luke." "I need to talk to Haley, can you hand her for a second." He heard his younger brother sigh. "Like I said bro, she's pissed off. She doesn't want to answer you." Lucas sighed. "Okay, tell her this. I am going to make this right and apologies, if she is by the Rivercourt Wednesday noon, all right?" Nathan mumbled something. "I don't think she wants to come." "Come on Nate, convince Haley to come. I didn't want to with fight with her." Nathan heard the sincere voice of his older brother through the phone. "You really have hurt her man." "I know I know Nathan. But I'm sorry, it's just ... you know how Peyton is, and you know how she is since the shooting. I don't want her to get hurt again. I'm the one who is causing her trouble. They don't have to blame her for that." Nathan listened careful to Lucas. "Are you sure there is nothing else?" "No, just let her be there. Wednesday noon at the Rivercourt." Lucas voice was begging him. "Okay, I'll do my best." And the both brothers hung up.

Wednesday noon, Lucas was nervous when it was noon and he still was alone by the Rivercourt. He hadn't spoken to Haley or Peyton in two days, and it was killing him. This uncertainly about Peyton's pregnancy. But first he needed to work things out with Haley. And tonight he would go and see Peyton. But he knew you first needed to stub Peyton before going after her. Otherwise, you'll get burnt.

And finally Nathan arrived he walked over to his brother. "Haley can be here any second. She first needed to tutor someone." Lucas nodded and the brothers talked. Ten minutes later Haley arrived. Lucas immediately jumped up and ran over to her to pull his arms around her. "Hales, I am sorry. I'm so sorry Haley." He whispered, Haley was overwhelmed but smiled. "It's okay Luke. But let's talk this over first."

Peyton felt herself so bad, now her dad was away and she broke up all her contacts. She decided to go outside and draw, she drove to the Rivercourt. When she arrived there, she saw three people. Two boys and a girl, and she recognised them. Peyton walked closer to tree where Lucas, Haley and Nathan were sitting against. "I still can not believe you did that Luke. Peyton is the one who always gets you into trouble. She's no good for you." That were the words she heard when she walked closer to the three. And suddenly Lucas saw Peyton standing there, her face upset. "Peyton!" He yelled but she was already running away and he wanted to go after her, but Nathan stopped him. "I'll go after her, you fix things here right?" And before Lucas could answer, Nathan was already running into the direction Peyton had run away.

Haley saw the worried look on his face, but decided to say nothing about it. Not wanting him to burst out again. In the meantime Nathan stopped running and found Peyton behind a tree, she was sobbing. "Hey Peyton. What's wrong?" And he sat down next to her, stroking her blond curls. "I screwed things up with Lucas." She sobbed. "Okay." He whispered. "Tell me about it." And so she told the whole story to her ex-boyfriend.

In the meantime, back by Haley and Lucas. "I'm sorry Haley." Lucas said while giving Haley a cookie. "I didn't mean it, I just heard your conversation with Brooke. And I freaked out because you were comforting and supporting her, and I actually came over to tell about what happened. And you heard the Brooke-version and I wanted to tell it myself." Haley nodded. "Can you forgive me?" Haley bit on her lower lip. "You really hurt me Lucas. Calling me backstabbing, I thought you knew me better." "Haley." Lucas begged. "I just wished I was the one laying in your arms to tell what happened, because the Brooke-version isn't even a half truth." Haley stared at Lucas. "But your version wouldn't be the whole truth Lucas, you know that." Lucas agreed. "Me or Brooke can't tell objective what happened. But I know what happened between Peyton and me. And it wasn't just sex, and Peyton didn't tempt me, like Brooke said. It was my fault in the first place, if you want somebody to blame, than it's me, not Peyton, but me." Haley sighed. "How could you be that stupid, having Brooke and than ran over to Peyton? I know you guys are close friends and the two of you have history. And you told me that you guys both were sad, but then I still can't get it." Lucas interrupted. "And what if I love her Hales, what if I am in love with her, what are you going to do than?" Haley eyes became worried. "Do you Luke? Do you love Peyton?" Lucas nodded. "Yes I do, with whole my heart, and nobody is going to hold me away from her again." He said resolute.

Birds were circling around the tree where Peyton and Nathan lay in the grass. "But Peyton do you love Lucas?" She didn't say a word but Nathan saw two flames in her amazing green eyes. "Peyton?" He asked. "Come on, you can tell me Peyton. It's our secret, okay? I won't tell anyone." He promised and putted his hand over his heart. "Not even Haley?" She asked nervous. "Not even Haley." He promised again. She nodded, but she still was surrounded by her silence. "And?" Nathan asked. She bit on her lower lip. "Peyton, you can tell me." He took her hand in his. She looked up from the ground and met his familiar blue eyes. "Yes, I do love him, with whole my heart. And I'm so in love with him, I've been for so long. And I want to grow old with him and maybe marry him one day and want to give birth to our children. I can't imagine a world without him. But ..." She stopped her speaking. "But what Peyton?" Nathan asked when she didn't speak anymore. "But what if he doesn't love me, what than?" Tears stood in her eyes. Nathan pulled her into a hug and gently stroked her hair. "That's why you have to tell him how you feel. You'll never know if you keep hanging around, being afraid about how he feels about you." She nodded and he smiled. "Where is the girl that was supposed to be my girlfriend." He wondered out loud and softly caressed her cheek. Peyton looked up. "I don't know, she's gone, I guess." She whispered. Nathan had a sad smile around his lips. "I actually miss her. I love how she yelled at me when I acted like a jackass." Peyton smiled by the memories of them. How she flied out at him. "And I miss the way she treated me. So dirty and horny..." "Okay, you can stop now." She said while slapping him. "I guess, she's still in there somehow." Nathan said and Peyton hugged him thankful.

They both watched before them, Peyton sat close to Nathan and her head rested against his shoulder. Peyton found it too soon to face Lucas and Haley. Nathan didn't insist, he knew how Peyton was, you couldn't force her. They enjoyed the peace of the place they were. Nathan was the one to break it and the words he spoke were enough for Peyton to open her eyes again.

"I'm sorry Peyton." He said. Peyton look at him, she was confused. "About what Nate?" "About this whole situation between you and Lucas, it's my entire fault." "What?" Even more confused than before. "What is your place in the situation I fucked up in the first place." Nathan looked into her eyes. "Why this screwed situation started, it is my fault. I'm the one to blame." When Peyton was about to cut him off, he reached his hand out to keep her quiet. "If I wasn't such a selfish jerk back then, we wouldn't be sitting here right now. I was a coward for keeping you by my side. I cared more about my ego than about you. What's the best player of the Tree Hill Ravens without his gorgeous girlfriend? Nothing, and you, you were beautiful and willing and searching for somebody that could love you. So you didn't put all those tragic stuff away. And from the first moment you and Lucas had met. I knew there was that spark, and I knew you liked him. God, sure you liked him. And I knew he was a better guy for you, better than I could ever been for you. I've should have let you go by then, then you two would get together before Brooke leaped upon Lucas. And that whole drama wouldn't be here. You guys would be happy, like me and Haley. If I had been more a friend for you and a brother to Lucas, this wouldn't be the result. I'm the one to blame Peyton. Don't blame Lucas for the way things went down between the two of you. But blame me for setting this all started." Peyton had tears in her eyes, she had to swallowed hard so she wouldn't start crying. "Nathan." She sobbed. "You don't have to ..." "I want to." He whispered and pulled her into a hug and let her cry on his chest.

Nathan saw how two birds were flying around each other, they looked like real love birds. "Are you going to tell him?" Peyton shook her head. "I want to, but I don't know how." Nathan looked at the girl in his arms, his beautiful former girlfriend. He barely recognized her. From the bitchy girl to this broken mess. It was time to get this girl back on track, Nathan knew how. "And if you don't tell him anytime soon, I'll tell him." Nathan threatened. "You know that's blackmailing right?" "No, I am helping my best ex-girlfriend to finally go after what she deserves." Peyton smiled shy, didn't know how the react by Nathan's behaviour. "Come on let's go back." And they ex-couple walked back to the Rivercourt.

They were almost there but Peyton shook her head. "I'm going." "What? You need to talk things out with Lucas." Nathan said, thinking about everything she told, about that fight Sunday night. Peyton bit on her lip again. "But I rather do it tonight, I want to think about how I am going to explain things." Nathan nodded. "That's okay, see you later." And he pressed a kiss to her cheek. Lucas saw Peyton walk away.

It would be tonight, he knew. It would be tonight, he felt it. This was going to be the night that clarity was the reason why there was a moon and stars. Those feelings would be admitting, and this circus of watching each other run and hide away because of their true feelings, it would finally be over. That hopefully their love would celebrate, and their future was ahead. It would be tonight, he wished and prayed.

It would be tonight ...


	16. This Is How You Remind Me

This Is How You Remind Me

**This Is How You Remind Me**

"Don't you ever get lonely Peyton?" A voice rose up behind her, when she turned around, she saw Lucas standing in her doorway. "No, I guess." They both walked towards each other and met each other in a hug. Lucas pulled her close into his embrace and Peyton rested her head on his chest. She inhaled the sweet smell of his shirt and closed her eyes, never wanting to let him go again. They stood there for minutes, in each others arms, thoughts racing around in their heads that was covered with their beautiful blond hair. Feelings flying around, waving a cocoon that made them feel safe. But also made them feel insecure and anxious, taking away the space to breathe. It would take away every inch of the air they both breathed, until there was no air anymore and they would choke in their own longing feelings for each other. So there was no way around anymore, they needed to confess and better sooner than later.

"I am sorry about Sunday." Peyton whispered. "Yeah me too." Lucas answered, stroking her back. Suddenly he pulled away and stepped back. "Where's your pepper spray?" He asked. "In the drawer over there." Peyton pointed at the cupboard besides her bed. "Okay." He said and walked over to it and took it. Peyton didn't understand what he was doing. "Luke …?" "I just want to make sure you're not going to threaten me with that thing again." Peyton laughed a little. "Yeah sorry about that too." He smiled. "So Peyton, I want to ask you something, but please do not freak out on me again." He said, and she nodded, knowing what the big question was. Lucas took a deep breath. Letting the life changing words roll of his tongue.

"Are you pregn…" And before he could even finish his sentence, Peyton had ran away, and he heard her throw up in her bathroom. He hoped it was not the answer to his question. "Peyton." He knocked on the room. She didn't answer. "Peyton?!" He began to panic. But than she answered. "It's okay." She said, and Lucas was relieved. He looked around the room, he went back to her cupboard and putted the pepper spray away again. A sweet pink paper caught his attention, but when he wanted to take it out of the drawer, Peyton opened the bathroom door again. "I am back." She said, smiling shyly when she stood in the doorway. Lucas walked over to her, she was paler than normal. "Everything okay?" He asked worried, she nodded. "Yeah fine, I just need to sit down, little dizzy, you know."

They both said down on the bed, tension between them was taste able. "What did you want to ask me again?" Lucas shook his head. "Peyton." He swallowed. "Are you … are you pregnant?" His voice sounded so weird, weak, and fragile. First she didn't answer, but then she said: "No I am not Lucas." He nodded, but didn't seem relieved. "Are you sure?" He asked again. "I am not Brooke Lucas. I am not going to lie about something huge like that, and especially not to you, I know what you are the result of, so I would never do that to you. You're good guy, Luke. I would never lie about something that would change both our lives." She whispered and rubbed his hand. He still didn't speak.

What are we doing than? They both asked their selves, we're lying about our feelings for each other, since we 'broke up', that night Peyton had left Lucas' porch. "And if you don't believe me, well I can prove you I have had my period." She stood up and walked over to her bathroom. "It's okay, I believe you Peyton." Lucas knew she wasn't lying. She walked over to the bed again and sat down besides him. Silence filled several minutes. But finally Lucas had the courage to break it.

"But what's wrong than, you're dizzy constantly, you have tummy ache, and the vomiting. Do you have the flue or something, because this really scares me Peyton." She smiled a little. "Okay, it's not the flue or something. It has to be something with my leg." Lucas was surprised. Her leg? Everything seemed fine with her leg, she could walk on it and it went well. Peyton could read the confused expression on his face.

"See, I'm talking stronger medication for my leg. Because I slowed down my healing progress with …" Peyton stopped talking, her head became as red as a tomato. "Well, you know what we did. So the doctor prescribed me something that would help me healing faster. But I think it has side effects or something. Because since I started taking them, I really feel sick and tired." Lucas smiled and stroked her cheek, blue eyes staring at her pretty face. "Have you been to the doctor again?" She shook her head. "I want to wait until my dad is back." "Okay, and where is he and when does he come back?" He asked. "He's in Europe and he'll be back in six weeks." Lucas couldn't believe what he heard. "Peyton! In six weeks, you can't wait so long. I'm going to the doctor with you tomorrow, first thing in the morning. And don't try to change my mind, we're going. There is no way you'll be sick for weeks because of your medication." Peyton knew she didn't have to try to convince him, if Lucas said they would go to the doctor, than well, they would go.

It was an hour later, and Peyton was sleeping peaceful in her bed. The stress and her illness had worn her out, Lucas couldn't blame her. She was a strong girl, she had gone through a lot and she knew how to fight back, but that didn't make her invincible.

He had watched her sleep for a while, she laid there, barely moving. Only her chest that rose and fell with each inhale of a breath she took. She looked so beautiful, Lucas immediately remembered how he fell in love with her. The words he wanted to tell her, needed to tell her, were burning in his heart. He wanted to wake her up, and tell her that he loved her. But she looked so peaceful, seemed to dream, he hadn't the heart to wake her up. And since he knew he wouldn't sleep before he had told her, he decided to search for another activity.

He walked around in her room, his fingers glided over the wood of the cupboards in her bedroom. And again, he ended up by the cupboard next to her bed. The pink paper really made him curious. It had this mysterious attraction. He knew he shouldn't go through her stuff, but she was his best friend, she had nothing to hide. Or at least, he thought that. As quiet as possible he took the pink paper out the drawer. It definitely was her writing. Slowly his eyes flew over the paper, the words filling his mind. It was a part of a text from a book, he recognized it, it was a text out a book he once borrowed her. It was about a tragic love, about how two people can be connected in so many ways, have so much in common, but are afraid about how the feel, and in the end, when they finally want to tell each other how they feel, one dies and leaves the other with a pain so deep, and hard, it will take the world down on its knees.

He thought it was funny that she copied it, but he didn't think about it any longer. Peyton still was sleeping, Lucas walked over to the bed, but realized that there was no need to wake her up and overwhelm her with his feelings. Lucas decided to check her music collection again. He wanted to know if she had gotten new albums and what she was listening to in this period of her life.

He knew her music closet, knew where to find everything, so he immediately recognize the new ones. The last two shelves, just above the ground, there were the new records and CD's. He looked at several albums, she really had a good taste in music, he realised again but he had already known that from day one that they met.

When he moved a box away on the ground, a glimpse of something caught his attention, it was further under her shelves. Lucas lay down and took the box from under the closet. It was a red cardboard box, the cover couldn't close anymore because there was too much stuff in it. He slowly opened it. It was full with papers and sketches, albums, photos, articles out of papers. There was sweet writing-paper was on top of it. Poems and fragments of books where written on it, it all was about love. Tragic love, about love-triangles, about people aching for one another but not be meant to be together. On nearly everything was a date, he noticed there were a lot of papers with the dates when he was in coma after his accident and non from the period she had a romance with Jake.

And suddenly an album cover demanded his attention. His name was written on it. 'The Lucas Scott Tape' was written on the loose cover. He turned it around and saw the titles of the songs written on the back. The most songs were love songs and a few songs were very recent. He went looking for the date, and found it on the CD. It was from last Sunday.

He saw she had made a little book too, he guessed that there were the lyrics written in. Lucas opened it and read what was written by her. His heart began to beat faster.

_Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional, reminds me of Lucas because _…

Peyton slowly woke up, when she opened her green eyes, she expected to be greeted by Lucas' blue eyes. But instead of that, she saw the light burning in her music closet and saw Lucas sitting on the ground in front of a red cardboard box. Panic and fear accomplished her as an ice cold wave.

She jumped out of her bed and ran to Lucas. "Put it away!" She screamed, Lucas was startled. A moment ago she was still sleeping in bed. "Peyton." He said softly. "Put it away Lucas!" She yelled, her eyes were big and they started to water. "Put it away!" Almost crying. "Peyton?" He asked again. "What's this?" He pointed to the box. "It's nothing, put it away!" Lucas stood up and stepped closer to her, but she ran out of her closet. "Peyton!" He went after her and caught her before she even got to her bedroom door. He turned her around and saw her upset face. "Peyton." He whispered. "What's in the box, what does it mean?" He asked softly. Tears streamed off her face. "It's nothing, you weren't suppose to see that. It means nothing …" He cut her off and looked straight into her eyes. "It means everything."

Cautiously he led her to her bed and let her sit down. Peyton sobbed softly. He squatted down in front of her. "Peyton." He gently stroked away a lost curl of her blond hair. "I need you to tell me what that means in your closet. Do you understand that?" She nodded. "It's … it's just …" She began to cry again. "Peyton, why are you so afraid to tell?" She didn't do anything but stare. "Peyton, I need you to tell what that means in your closet." She shook her head. "You don't, it's my closet and it's my box, you shouldn't be in there. There's no reason for you to explore my room." She whispered harsh.

He took a deep breath, this beautiful girl, so broken and so afraid. "I know." Lucas whispered, trying his best to soothe her. "But I did, and I found the box, and now I need you to tell me what's going on. Please tell me Peyton." She sobbed and tried to swallow her tears away. "The box … it's just to remind me how screwed up things are between us. How I am hurting and aching." She sniffed quietly. "It's to remind me how I let my chance pass by."

Lucas felt tears behind his eyes coming up. He gently took her head between his hands and forced her to look at him. Their eyes connected. Lucas softly said:

"Our change is not passed by Peyton. Brooke blew it for the two of us. When you walked away from me that night, my heart was broken, because I knew you still were in love with me and so was I, still in love with you. Maybe those facts never changed and maybe were done hiding or at least I am."

Peyton was confused and shocked. "Lucas. I can't." She whispered and pushed him away from her. She quickly got up and tried to walk away, Lucas saw her passing him by.

"Peyton, why are you so afraid of how you feel about me?" He asked, the words were enough to let her stop. She turned around and sniffed again, with the palms of her hands removing the left tears on her cheeks. "Because." She began. "Because, if we get together. You probably realise I am just one sick mess. And that you don't love me and you'll leave. People always leave, Lucas." "And sometimes they come back, Peyton." He guaranteed her. She shook her head. "And if we even find a way to let things work between us, I really don't know if that is what I want." She whispered sad.

"Peyton. I will do everything to work things out between the two of us." He said softly, his voice sounded never so honest. "But I don't know if this is what I want." She whispered. Lucas walked closer to her, his beautiful ocean blue eyes had this serious look, it almost scared Peyton. Lucas softly brought his hands to Peyton's cheeks and pressed his lips on hers. She stiffened, not knowing what overcame her. It was a short but intense contact between them. Lucas pulled away. "Is this what you want?" He asked, his face a breath away from hers. "I really don't know." She whispered again. And before she could take a breath, she found his lips pressed against hers again. When her hands pressured his shoulders, he let go of her. "And …" He asked. "Lucas." She whispered but before she even could spell another word. Lucas' lips found themselves forced to hers the third time in less than three minutes this evening. She weakened when she felt his warm body pressed into hers, forcing her to step backwards by every step he took forwards. And her back met her bedroom wall, at the exact same moment as their tongues met. The kiss was dragging and intense, it left them both breathless, so they needed to gasp for air.

"Lucas." Peyton whispered. "Peyton." Lucas whispered. The contact between their eyes was so strong and overwhelming, they let go of the fears and let their feelings take over.

Lucas lifted Peyton up and lay her down on her bed, spreading little soft kisses on her face. Slowly he fell down besides her, embracing her in his arms. Caressing each other with kisses and soft touches of their hands. Their eyes making an agreement for the rest of their young lives.

Running away from reality a little longer …


	17. Dreams of Reality

Dreams of Reality

_**A/N: **__**Hello, here I am again. And again with another question. I have been considering to work together with a beta-reader since I joined but I never set through with the plan. But the review from 'Sundials' gave me the push I needed. Thanks again 'Sundials' by the way. I really own it to all of you to give it my best and I could use the help of someone who has English as their first language. So if there is a beta-reader here who wants to corporate with me, let me know through a review or PM … Thanks again to everyone who read and/or reviewed my stories, you don't have any idea how much it means to me. Much love, Veronique.**_

**Dreams of Reality **

Do you know that feeling when you wake up? The enjoyable heat when you lay under your bed sheets. The pleasant heat, it's not too warm, not too cold. It's just … perfect. And it stays, makes you feel good, peaceful, dreaming. It embraced you with all is power, as long as you don't move but you only breathe.

That was the feeling Peyton woke up with the next morning. Laying there tangled between the sheets. Lucas' body intertwined with her. His arms protective around her body.

She wasn't fully awake, still her mind was teasing her. Only flawed memories came floating back to her. Slowly spoken words came back, looks of their broody eyes, touches of their hands.

Peyton began to panic, what if this wasn't real? What if she was dreaming again? This couldn't be real, it never would be real! Lucas just couldn't be sleeping next to her, he couldn't said those words yesterday, she hadn't confess her feelings for him. They didn't kiss, it was just an illusion. She blamed her mind for playing tricks with her. She had dreamed this so many times before, why wouldn't be dreaming this time? She would wake up in a minute, and everything would be like it always had been.

She would wake up and found her mother besides her. Softly her mother would stroke her back when she listened how Peyton faltered told her nightmare while she cried. How worse her life would be without her, that if she died, all bad things would happen. She would say her future was black. She would be sick of sorrow if she lost her, that her dad always was away, she would have a jerk of an ex-boyfriend, that there would be a woman called Ellie that told her she was her real mom, she would get shot by someone who lost control because of his sorrow, she would have no friends and the only friend she had was the boy she loved so much, but who couldn't love her because he was in love with her 'best friend'. And her mom would tell that it all was over, that she didn't have to think about it again, that she still was here and she wasn't going anywhere. She would be younger, so much younger …

But than Peyton felt how Lucas woke up besides her, his body stirred and than … his blue eyes opened and went looking for something he recognized. And found that in Peyton's green eyes.

He smiled, the warmth of it right glowing on Peyton. But Lucas saw the anxious look in Peyton eyes. Without words he questioned her.

"This is real right, I am not dreaming. Am I?" Her voice was so fragile. "Is this real? Tell me, is this real Lucas?" She asked on a whispering tone, her eyes anxious looking at him. He smiled. "Yes, it is Peyton." He whispered and lifted her on top of him, so he could press his lips on hers. Peyton immediately wrapped her arms around his strong and warm body, and held him for dear life.

Her embrace was so strong, exceptionally strong which made Lucas search connection with her green eyes. His face had a serious expression. "Heey, what's wrong?" He asked softly, breaking out of her hold. Their gazes locked, Lucas gently rubbed her upper arms. "I am so afraid this is a dream, that this is not real." "What?" He asked, barely believing her words. "Why would you think that Peyton?" He said, trying to search an answer in her big, anxious, green eyes. "Because there always keep bad things happening to me. And every time as something good enters my world, it disappears as soon as it was there." Lucas pulled her in a hug, holding her close as he stroked her back soothingly. "I'm not going anywhere Peyton." He whispered and after those words, he pressed a kiss on her cheek.

They laid there in silence, minutes flew by and suddenly Peyton's laugh could be heard. "Stop it. Stop it!" She yelled when Lucas' fingers danced across her body, tickling her. "Stop it." She begged laughing, trying to release herself from his hold. But before she could try decent, he flipped her over so he was on top of her. He kept tickling her, and she screamed and laughed. "Come on Luke." She made out between the laughs. "Stop it." But he didn't, he kept teasing her. She knew it was pointless to fight him, because he was too strong for her and he lay on top of her, so she totally was defenceless. So she decided to play her 'secret card'.

"Lucas?" She asked sweetly, trying to draw his attention. "Lucas?" Trying not to laugh when his fingers slid along hips, causing her to shift. "Luke?" She looked into his blue eyes, her look was naughty. Her tongue licked her lips and she parted her lips slightly. Lucas' eyes became bad, he was hypnotised by her beauty. Peyton smiled, knowing how easy it was to trick him.

She bit on her lower lip and pushed up her hips. And just a second after that, Lucas crashed his lips hungrily on hers. The kiss grew more passionate with every movement of their lips. She deepened the kiss, and flipped him over again. Now she was on top again, her hands slid from his cheeks to his waist and stopped there and than Peyton began to tickle Lucas. And before Lucas could react, she was already running through her room. He jumped of the bed and almost caught her by her bathroom door. Almost because the door was slammed shut to his face. He tried to open it, but she had already locked it. But that didn't stop him from keep knocking on it. But she didn't answer.

First he thought she just wanted to play a little longer. "Come on Peyton, you've got your revenge. But you can come out now, I want to finish our make out session." He said, leaning against the locked door. But when she after five minutes still wasn't out again, he began to worry. Just when he wanted to knock again and ask her what she was doing, the door opened again. In the doorway stood a pale girl with messy hair and a hand pressed on her stomach.

"God Peyton! Are you okay?" Lucas asked while he pulled an arm around her waist, preventing her from falling, she was shivering so heavy. They slowly walked to the bed and Lucas guided Peyton until she sat down. Lucas squatted down in front of her. His fingers ran over her cheek, she looked up, her face looked so tired. "Everything all right?" He asked again, she nodded. But just seconds later, she hang forward, groaning out of the heavy pain she felt. Lucas tilted back her head so she needed to look him in the eye. "Peyton … where does it hurt?" He asked, trying to find an answer in her eyes. "Everything hurts." She moaned with a voice filled with pain. "More specific please?" Lucas asked. "My belly hurts like hell and I am dizzy, and my leg feels like it is burning." "Okay." Lucas replied and there was a short pause. "We're going to the doctor, immediately." He said resolute. "But!" Peyton tried to convince him. "Nothing 'but' Peyton. We're going! I swear, I don't want to see the girl I love, suffer so much. And especially when it isn't a need." She knew it was useless to fight back and she nodded, smiling a little inside because he had referred to her as the girl he loved. "Come on, change your clothes so we can go." He said, their clothes were crumbled, because they slept in them last night. He walked out of the room to give her a little privacy.

Ten minutes later Lucas heard Peyton call his name, he walked into her room again and found her only dressed in underwear and a white shirt with long dark blue sleeves, her jeans on her feet. "What's up?" Lucas asked while walking closer. "Okay, this sucks. But in can't get my pants on, because my leg hurts so much. Please, can you help me?" She begged. He smiled, knowing if she asked him for help, she was letting him in again. "I would love to." He answered and walked over to her, carefully he bent down to catch the waist of her pants. "Ready?" He asked, Peyton moved a little and then answered: "Yes." Lucas slowly stood up and putted on her jeans. But when the stiff clothing touched the scarf on her knee, she cried out of pain. Lucas stopped, it hurt him, knowing that Peyton was in so much pain. She leaned against his body, desperately trying to catch a breath. Then she managed to catch one, breathed in deeply and she took a deep breath and swallowed. That was the sign for Lucas to go on. In one swift motion, he putted the jeans on. After that, he let Peyton rest against him for a few minutes. Gently he stroked her belly, trying to catch the pain with his fingers.

When she finally was 'recovered' again for her effort, Lucas carried her downstairs and they drove to Lucas' house. "I'm going to change my clothes." He said, and it really was a need. "Come on, I'll help you out of the car. So you can 'meet' my mom …" She interrupted him by shacking her head. "No, I'll stay here, you'll be quicker back. 'Cause if you first need to get me out of the car and than back in again. It's going to take some time, and I want this to be over soon." She said. He looked worried, but he stepped out and disappeared in the house.

Ten minutes later, he was back besides her in the car. He wore a blue T-shirt and a pair of dark jeans. Peyton thought he looked amazing, and she smiled, she couldn't stop smiling. Realizing she had a beautiful boyfriend. "Okay, why are you smiling? Is there toothpaste on my face or something?" Lucas asked when he stopped for a red light. "No." Peyton replied. "I just can't stop smiling because I have a beautiful boyfriend." Lucas laughed. "Come here." Peyton whispered and ogled at him, bringing her face closer to his. Lucas instantly brought his hand to her cheek and their lips met. First slow but then it got more intense, Lucas' hand slid behind Peyton's head, trying to deepen the kiss. But they were interrupted by a hooting car behind them. They quickly broke the kiss and found out that the traffic light was already green. Peyton smiled and Lucas drove further to the hospital.

It was peaceful in the waiting room, there wasn't anybody else except Lucas and Peyton. Her head rested against his shoulder and her hand could be found back in his. She closed her eyes and enjoyed Lucas' attendance. Finally, the loneliness was over. And suddenly she heard footsteps coming closer, she pulled her hand away and sat up straight, shove as far as possible away from him. So it looked like Lucas and Peyton were two strangers. First Lucas assumed she expected the doctor to walk in. But when she pulled away from him every time she heard something that could give a sign of the proximity of people. He really got suspicious. Lucas was about to ask her what was going on but he was interrupted.

"Miss Sawyer." They heard a deep voice after a while. Lucas looked up and saw a man from almost fifty, he guessed, staring into the waiting room. Quickly Peyton stood up and Lucas guided her into another room. "So what brings you here Miss Sawyer?" The doctor asked. "Peyton." She said, he nodded. "Peyton." Lucas could read from her body language that Peyton wasn't very comfortable with this situation. The doctor did notice it too. "I am sorry, but your doctor is on vacation, I am here to replace her until she gets back." Then than the man looked at Lucas. "And you are?" He asked. "I am Lucas Scott." He answered. "You're the one that carried Peyton out of that school?" Lucas nodded. "And actually I am her boyf…" Peyton interrupted Lucas before he could even speak out the word. "Lucas is a very good friend of mine." She said and smiled at the doctor. Lucas felt a shot of inner pain drill through his body.

But then the doctor got back to the point. "What brings you here Peyton?" He repeated. "Well," Peyton began. "I am taking stronger medication for my leg, and since I started taking it, I really feel sick and tired." She explained, the doctor wrote it down. "And what do you mean by sick?" Peyton shifted a little so she sat more comfortable in her chair. "I feel dizzy all the time, and I have tummy ache. And I am really tired but sleeping doesn't help and my leg is really hurting, it feels like it burns. Is it possible that they are side effects from my medication?" She asked, the doctor kept writing. "Can it be? Can it be that her medication is causing her this, because sometimes she can't hardly stand on her feet 'cause she is in so much pain." Lucas said while looking at the pale Peyton next to him. The doctor looked up to Lucas. "It's a possibility, so we'll check that. Peyton?" He looked at the blond girl. "You can go sit there." Pointing at the table a little further. Peyton walked over to it, and the doctor followed her. The man examined her carefully, doing a normal routine.

"Can you take your shirt off, please? So I can examine you better." Peyton bit on her lower lip, looking at Lucas. The doctor followed her look and found her eyes staring at Lucas. "Would you mind to leave Miss Sawyer and me alone for a minute?" He asked, Lucas stood up and wanted to walk to the door. "You can stay Lucas." Peyton said. "It's okay." She quickly took of her shirt, immediately the doctor and Lucas realized why she was so uncomfortable. She was only wearing a red bra underneath her shirt. Now a blond girl in jeans with Converse on her feet and a red bra was revealed, Peyton crossed her arms. Lucas noticed she had lost weight, she was even thinner than he had realized.

The doctor brought the stethoscope to her chest. "Take a deep breath." The doctor said, and so did Peyton. He moved the stethoscope from her breast to her back. Lucas saw her chest rose and fell with each breath she took. "Good." He said after listing to her heartbeat. "Will you lie down please?" He asked, and Peyton did what was said to her. The doctor brought his hands to her abdomen, softly pressing with his fingers on her tummy. But when he pressed harder, she began to groan. He looked up. "Does that hurt much?" She shook her head. "A little." She replied, still uncomfortable. "And this?" His fingers glided under the waist of her jeans, pressing there. Peyton stifled a yell. The doctor brought his hand to the other side of her body. His fingers again glided under the waist of her jeans, and pressed on her abdomen again. Now Peyton couldn't help it, and cried out. Tears were forming in her green eyes. Lucas stood up quickly and walked over to her. "Are you under pressure, or do you have stress, or have you been in an emotional situation lately?" The doctor asked, while putted away some stuff. "My dad left for six weeks to Europe, and the goodbye was very emotional for me, because it was the first time since the shooting he was away again." The doctor nodded. "Why?" Peyton asked worried, pulling her shirt back on. "Well, I think your illness, is because of the side effects but it got worse because you're worried about stuff and the things that are playing in your head." He said.

Silence found his way into the room, letting the three people in silence. But after a minute, the doctor broke it. "I'll prescribe you your old medication for leg, and some painkillers. And I'll say, meet me in two weeks for a check up." He shook Peyton's hand and Lucas' hand. "And this pair of crutches is for you Peyton." And handed her a pair of crutches. "Use them as long as you need." He gave as advice.

Lucas helped Peyton in the back of his car. When he hung over her, trying to make her comfortable, she pulled Lucas down so his lips fell on hers. She eagerly opened her mouth so she could welcome his tongue. Her hands finding their way under his T-shirt. When she wanted to pull it off, Lucas broke the kiss. "Peyton." He said breathless. "What was that?" Desperately he was trying to catch his breath. "My way to say thank you!" She pulled her arms around his neck, trying to pull him down again, but he brought her arms to her body again. "Later, when we're home. Not here." He whispered and closed the door and walked back to the front of the car.

When they drove back, the song 'Fever' in the version of Madonna was on the radio. Peyton began to sing, off-key, but she didn't care. "You give me fever, when you kiss me. Fever when you hold me tight." Lucas laughed, Peyton made her voice sound naughty and sexy. Shivers ran from his spine, it turned him on. And suddenly Peyton changed the text of the song. "Lucas loved Peyton. Peyton, she felt the same. When he puts his arms around her." Then Lucas took over and sang. "Peyton, baby you're my flame." They both laughed, and continued singing together. A happy feeling warmed them both.

When the song ended, Lucas was back at his house. "Come on Peyton, let's say hi to my mom." But Peyton didn't react. "Peyton?" He looked in the backseat, checking if she wasn't sleeping, but she wasn't. "I rather want to go home Luke. I am exhausted." She said with a tired voice. He nodded and rode to her house. When he carried her upstairs and she laid her bed, she seemed to revive again. She hopped around the room, she used all her strength to jump onto Lucas' back. He was surprised.

"I thought you were tired?" He asked. "Not tired enough." She said and began to kiss his back of his neck. "I need to thank you again. And did I mention we have a make out session to finish?" She whispered in his ear, her tongue ran along his earlobe. He laughed and threw her gently on the bed. They started a heavy make out session, Peyton was excited and began to take of his shirt and after that her own. She guided his big hands to her back so he could unhook her bra. But he didn't, he instead broke the kiss. "Peyton." He whispered. "We really should call my mom or your dad to tell the happy news." Lucas wanted to unhook her red bra, but she moved away. Peyton searched her shirt and putted it on again.

"I really am tired Luke, you should go home." She stood up and walked away from the bed with her crutches. Lucas stood up too. She walked to the door and opened it. "See you tomorrow Lucas." She said and pressed a short kiss on his lips and closed the door. Letting a shocked Lucas alone. "What the hell just happened?" He asked himself when he made his way out of her house.


	18. They Asked Me Why I Believe In You

They Asked Me Why I Believe in You

**They Asked Me Why I Believe in You**

It was already hours after dawn, but Peyton lay still in her bed, knowing her alarm clock had been warning her already two times. She knew that in less than an hour, school would begin. But somehow she was tired, she didn't want to get up again. Peyton kept turning around and hoping she would be hugged by the soft arms of sleep. She wanted to sleep, wanted to sleep the tiredness of her life away. But the soft arms wouldn't hug her, the only thing that hugged her, was the terrible sound of her alarm clock that warned her for the third time in the same morning. It called her, and suddenly the annoying beeping became a voice in her head:

_Pey-ton-get-up! Pey-ton-get up! Pey-ton-get up! _

It kept teasing her. She sighed and got up, there was no way she would get some sleep, because she felt so bad over how she had treated Lucas yesterday. But she couldn't do about it.

She quickly got up and walked to her closet, and picked out some cloths. She quickly got dressed. Peyton was dressed to kill. With a short jeans skirt, a dark grey T-shirt and high heels on her feet, she was going to kill Lucas with her sexiness. Quickly she brought some strawberry lip-gloss on her lips, checked her slightly curling blond hair and checked the rest of her appearance one last time in the mirror. Then she grabbed her school back and left her house.

She began walking, without her crutches, on her high heels. She knew she was killing herself. But she didn't care that much. When she arrived at Lucas' house, she knew they had less than twenty minutes to get to school.

Peyton walked over to his porch and took her cell phone and called Lucas. She heard his cell phone ringing, and than she heard quick steps in the room.

"Hello." His boyish spoke.

"Hi." She replied playful.

"Peyton? Where are you?" He asked.

"If you would mind to open your door, you'll found out." She sounded amused.

And just seconds later his door opened, in the doorway stood a blond boy dressed in a green shirt and dark jeans, and finished with sneakers. "Wow!" Lucas was amazed by her appearance. "You look incredible." He looked at her again, from had to toe, she looked gorgeous. "Yeah, I know." She answered and placed a feather-light kiss just besides his lips. "You don't look so bad yourself." She said while running a finger across his chest. "Come in, I'll be ready in a second." He said but she shook her head. "My feet hurt." She pouted, Lucas laughed. "I believe that." Looking at her high heels. "Why are your crutches actually?" He said, when he suddenly noticed she actually needed them more than she wanted to admit. "I left them at home." She said while rubbing a hand against her legs. "That's not your smartest move, Blondie. But come in, maybe my mom has other shoes for you ..." She shook her head. "I have a pair of Converse in my locker, and we have to hurry. We only got ten minutes left."

They arrived in school just in time. Peyton changed her high heels for a pink pair of All Stars. Lucas began to laugh. "Pink?" He asked, looking at the sweet, pink shoes. "Yeah, I bought them when I broke up with Nathan. I just wanted to be someone else, and I bought them. Brooke always said that shopping is the best you can do after someone broke up with you. For her, it gives beautiful clothing, but for me, it gives pink shoes." She pouted, the bell rang, and they both hurried to their different classes.

Time was running by slow, Lucas was lost in his thoughts, there was something about Peyton. There was something wrong with her, they were together for less than 48 hours, and it already went wrong. What had they done wrong to deserve this?

Time ran by slow, Lucas was so lost in his thoughts, that he didn't hear the teacher call his name. "Lucas? Lucas Scott? Mister Scott, would you mind to answer my question?" Lucas was confused and than met the ignored eyes of his history teacher. He didn't know what to do and he looked helpless to Haley. She pointed to a picture of a man in her history book. It was George Washington. Lucas looked from her to his teacher and back to her. Her eyes screamed: "Say it Lucas Eugene Scott, you'll get detention if you don't!"

"George Washington." Lucas answered. The teacher was surprised that he knew the answer to the question. The lessons continued, and after a while it was noon. Peyton checked some books out in the library, searching a book about modern art. She needed it for her art class.

"Gotcha, Blondie!" Two muscular arms were wrapped around her torso, and even before she could turn around, Lucas leaned in fast and his lips met hers. His arms glided around her waist, wanting to pull her closer. But than she broke the kiss, Lucas licked his lips. "Strawberry." He said and hungrily leaned in again, impatient to taste her sweet, velvet lips again, but Peyton broke away. She checked if they were alone, and yes, they were the only two people in this part of the library. "I really need to go." She said and walked away, almost ran away, even before Lucas could say anything.

For the rest of the day, Lucas hadn't the change to get near to Peyton again. She always seemed to disappear in front of his eyes as he saw her in the hallways. As he blinked with his blue eyes, the blond girl was already gone. He felt like she was avoiding him, and he definitely didn't like the thought of that.

Time became slower and slower, seconds like minutes, minutes like hours ... . And the same question stayed teasing his mind. What was Peyton doing? Lucas felt like Peyton was playing games with him, giving him it all and than suddenly she took it away. Letting him dangle between everything and nothing. On the edge between flying out of happiness or falling in confusion.

The rest of the day went by in a slow pass, but it passed. Finally the school bell rang and Lucas headed to his car, hoping to find Peyton there. But she wasn't there, he waited for ten minutes, but she didn't come. After another five minutes, he turned around, and then he saw a little note between his windscreen wipers.

_Hi Lucas,_

_I am already home, Bevin gave me a ride._

_See you later,_

_Love Peyton_

Lucas felt his rage increase, he thought that yesterday, she maybe felt sick and a little confused from what happened the night before. But now, she was totally avoiding him, as soon as somebody was near to them. She did like he had the plague. Was she ashamed of him, did she think he was below her?

He tried to stifle his temper, he thought, being with his mom would give him some sort of calm. But it only got worse, after dinner he couldn't take it anymore. He drove to Peyton's house, he needed to know what the hell she was doing?

When he had made his way upstairs, after off course finding her front door unlocked, he found her listening to music and her homework in front of her. On her bed lay her sketchbook, a few pencils and an eraser. She didn't notice that he was there, until she heard his harsh breathing. She turned around a saw him standing in the doorway. The blond boy had this furious, scaring look in his eyes, and from his body language you could easily read that he was on the edge of his rage.

"Hi Luke." She said happily, ignoring his appearance. She walked over to him, wanting to kiss him. But when he moved away abruptly. Lucas walked away from her. "What are you doing Lucas?" She asked confused. "No! What the fuck are you doing Peyton?! Playing tricks with me?!" He yelled, his rage made his head red.

Peyton began to cry, tears streamed from her face, sobs expressing her messy feelings. Lucas bounced back from his behaviour. "God sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you." He said fast and rushed over to his girl that sat curled up in a ball into a corner of her room. "I didn't mean to yell at you." He said and touched her arm, but as soon as his fingers touched her skin, she rejected it. "Go away." She whispered, tears making wet spots on the floor. "I am sorry Peyton, I didn't mean to yell at you." He apologized again. She kept sobbing. "What's wrong Peyton?" He asked as he sat down in front of her, on his knees. But she didn't answer him. "Peyton." He said softly, but he didn't touch her, not knowing is she was ready to accept it.

"Why are you crying? Have I scared you?" She shook her head. "Us scares me." She whispered with a little voice. Lucas felt like someone who was hit with a bat on the back of his head. "I don't understand Peyton. What about us? Is there something wrong with 'us'?" He asked carefully. "There is nothing wrong with 'us'." She said. "Only with this 'us', were in now." She snivelled and saw his confused face. "I only know 'us' as friends, as a sort of enemies, as two tortured people who sneak around. I don't know 'us' else than that, and in those three ways, it makes me feel save. I am just afraid to discover what it would be if we were different."

Lucas shook his head, he didn't understand her. "Is that the reason why you don't want to see my mom, or call your dad, or that other people see 'us'?" He asked and carefully he tried to touch her arm again. He was relieved when she didn't refuse it. But she again said nothing. "Peyton, I don't understand why you're acting like you do. Please tell me what's going on in the pretty head of yours." He moved himself closer to her. The sobbing Peyton began to speak again: "It's just ... I want to be together with you, but I don't want to see us as a 'couple'." A heat quickly burned inside Lucas' chest. "No, not the whole non-exclusive thing again!" Lucas groaned, and the rage came back, memories of him and Brooke came back, bad memories.

"No, it's not like that." She said, tears still streaming off her cheeks. "I want to be together with you Lucas, there is nothing more I want. But it's just ... I don't want anyone to know. And it's not that I am ashamed of you, or something. But if we tell everyone, and it turns out that we won't work out. It would be all too painful, and don't want to disappoint other people besides myself and you." Lucas' rage weakened, but still there was something in the look of his eyes. Still the darkness that hided away in his blue eyes. When Peyton looked up, and saw that in his eyes. She began to sob again.

"I just want it to be 'us'." She cried, tears rolling down her cheeks freely. Her body trembled and it broke Lucas' heart. Knowing he caused her this. Careful, he took her hands and made her stand up. Lucas guided her to follow him, and sat down on the only chair in her room. His arms welcomed her and he leaded her to sit down on his lap. She still cried, tears like rain falling down. They made dirty tracks on her beautiful face. Lucas held her closer and slowly rocked her on his lap, stroking her back, while she sobbed against his chest. "Sshh Peyton." He whispered in her ear that was covered by her blond hear. "It's okay now. I am not mad at you." He tenderly kept rocking her on his lap, soothing her while he felt her warm tears that wetted his shirt. After a while, when he felt her calm down in his arms, he gently tilled her head back, his blue eyes found there way into her green eyes.

"I can't be mad at you. You mean too much to me Peyton." He was quiet and held his breath, stared into her amazing eyes, always taking his breath away no matter when or where, green eyes. "I love you." He said, his voice sounded somehow unsure, but he repeated those beautiful words. "I love you Peyton. I love you Peyton Sawyer." He said, the words rolled from his tongue, making a magic web around them, made them a dreamy wonderland. Her eyes began to water again, and she wanted to say something so beautiful and special to him, that he even would love her more. But she couldn't found the words, Lucas saw it, when she wanted to say something but she struggled at the loss of her words, Lucas placed one of his fingers on her lips. His gorgeous blue eyes spoke that she didn't have to talk, he knew how she felt. He knew she wasn't so good with words in general.

Lucas leaned in and his lips came across hers. When she responded uncertain, Lucas placed his right hand behind her head and cradled it a little. Peyton grew more passionate and she stretched herself out against him. She hung over him, so he needed to lean back in the chair. He moaned appreciative by her renewed lust.

After a while, when all their breath reserves were empty. Lucas lifted her up from his lap and placed her careful on her bed, after he had put away her sketchbook, drawing stuff. He softly went lying next to her, holding her close to him. Peyton rested with her head against his chest that rose and fell. Time passed by and Lucas let her recover in silence from her emotional evening. He knew how sensitive Peyton had become since the shooting. The moment that bullet was drilled into her leg, she became conscious how fragile and unthinkable life is, and how soon it could end. She had already known it, she had known it since the day her mother died, and reminded when she found her birthmother dead. But when she had been so close to dead, had been standing before the golden gates of heaven, now she realised that she needed to take everything she could in life, because it can end in the blink of an eye.

After what Lucas thought was an hour, he shifted a little and sat up on her bed. Peyton groaned when she felt his safe warmth taken away from her. She looked up to his amazing blue eyes. "We need to tell some people Peyton, we owe it to them." She nodded, still not wanting it, but she knew he was right. "Let's see." He said while he thought. "I know you won't tell too many people, so, let's say ... we both tell it to the two people who we want to know it." She agreed by his idea, it didn't seem so bad. "I assume you want to tell it to your dad and ..." She continued. "I want to tell it to Nathan. He really helped me and he's being an amazing friend. He was willing to blackmail me if I didn't tell you how I felt about you." She smiled. "He knew?" Lucas asked confused. "Yeah, he knows everything. I assume that Haley knows it too?" He replied with a nod. "And I need to tell it to my mom, after everything she went through, I don't want to have secrets for her anymore, and she's my mom. I actually can't wait to tell her who my beautiful girlfriend is." He smiled. "And I want to tell it to Haley, she's my best friend, and since you're going to tell it to Nathan, she will know it only a few minutes later." He laughed, and so did Peyton. "I actually want to tell it to three people." Lucas told her with a voice full of hesitation, Peyton looked a little disappointed. "I am sorry Peyton, it's not what we agreed, but I really want to tell it to Skills. He's my best friend and he'll feel disappointed if I don't tell him." She nodded, she knew Skills was a good guy, he wouldn't tell anyone, and she was happy that Lucas paid so much attention to his friend's feelings.

Lucas pulled Peyton into his arms and she rested against his shoulder. "Tomorrow after game, we'll tell them, is that okay with you?" She nodded. Lucas stayed a little longer, it was a quarter past eleven. "I really should go home, I don't want to make my mom worried. I actually promised her that I would be home by now." He got up, and Peyton did the same, the moment he wanted to leave the door, she quickly walked over and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Any possibility I can change your mind?" She said and made a puppy-face. "I am afraid not." He said, Peyton hands slipped under the waist of his jeans and her lips were pressed against his neck. "No?" She asked, sweetly. "Well, maybe." She smiled and moved herself closer to him. "Peyton, you're really tempting girl." He whispered when her lips travelled lower to his shoulder. Her fingers grabbed in the fabric of his T-shirt, and leaded him to the bed. Lucas laid her down and let his lips softly slide along the nape of her neck. Peyton groaned and closed her eyes, enjoying the moment, but suddenly the lips were gone. She opened her eyes to find Lucas in the doorway again. "Sorry Blondie, but I really have to go." She pouted but walked over and kissed him goodbye on the lips. "See you tomorrow." She whispered and let go of him.

When Lucas was gone, she didn't want to sleep, so she walked into her music closet and picked out an album. She was in a 'Dashboard Confessional-mood', so she chose their album 'A Mark, A Mission, A Brand, A Scar'. But then the tiredness of her mind and body reached her. It had been an emotional evening and a painful day for her legs. She fell asleep with the soft music from Dashboard Confessional, Hands Down, she entered her dreams while the memories of her first meeting with Lucas played in her mind. The same song, she had heard than, but it already seemed a lifetime ago.


	19. Haning By This Moment Here With You

Hanging By This Moment Here With You

_**A/N: Hi people! Today is a very important day (or at least for me). For the first time I publish chapters that are 'corrected' by a beta reader. And my beta reader is 'Shnoz08' and she is the best. **__**She already helped me and gave some kickass advice. So a big, big, big, big, big thanks towards her, I can't ever thank her enough already for willing to be my beta reader. So think about her too when you read this and thank her too 'cause she deserves it. Thanks already everyone for reading. Don't forget to review…they are the reason that the sky is bluer, the sun brighter, and the day better. Much love, Veronique. **_

**Hanging By This Moment Here With You**

When Lucas woke up the next morning, there was a smile on his face. Today was 'the day'. The day his life would change. Today he could introduce Peyton Sawyer as his girlfriend. After so many years, after all the years he had a crush on her, the years he missed because he was a coward and chose Brooke over Peyton. The years full of sadness, and hope that was like a little flame that was about to expire.

But now, that hope was renewed. Peyton confessed that she was in love with him, that she loved him, that she needed him, that she wanted him, that she also had a spark of hope, in the form of a cardboard box, left for the two of them.

Lucas just lay awake, staring at a picture of her. She smiled brightly and her blonde curls danced around her face, with two amazing green eyes which sparkled. He took that picture at the beginning of this summer, when they spent so much time together. She just had discovered a new song which she thought was awesome. That picture is how she looked when she found a new song, found something that caught her attention, as she discovered a new piece of this big world.

He kept looking at the photo, hoping it would come alive. That she would walk into his room and greet him. That she would hug him and kiss him, and that they would lay together on his bed. That they would lay, just staring at each other, dreaming about their life together, and never letting each other go again.

That was his deepest wish, to never let Peyton go again. He had lost her so many times to find his way back to her, now they needed all their time to take back what they lost.

He didn't know how long he looked at the photograph, but after a while, his mom walked into his bedroom. "Lucas, get up. You promised me that you would help in the café today." He groaned and sighed, but then got up. He felt a sort of strange feeling his stomach when he walked away from the picture of his girl. Lucas felt like he lost her a little, so when Karen was out of his bedroom, he walked over to the photograph and pressed a kiss on it. He couldn't wait to taste Peyton's lips again, the sweet taste of her perfect velvet lips.

In the meantime, Peyton was already up, she couldn't sleep, today was 'the day' that Lucas would introduce her to the people he loved the most, and he would introduce her as his 'girlfriend'. Yeah, she liked the sound of that, Lucas Scott's girlfriend. And she could introduce Lucas as her 'boyfriend'.

The music of The Goo Goo Dolls was spilling from the stereo. She loved their song 'Iris', she was listening to one of the mix tapes she had made for Lucas. The song had been playing the whole morning, she loved it. It described how she felt, so perfectly. Only Lucas got her, he was the only one. The only one who took her for who she was, and that didn't care about everything that she had to deal with, he was not afraid of it. He was the only one who was her everything.

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_'Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am_

She sang softly, swaying around in her bedroom. She was wondering what she should wear tonight, she wanted to look pretty and girly, but still wanted to be herself. She chose her favourite jeans and a light purple dress that finished just above her knees and purple dotted ballerina shoes. Then she searched after the leather jacket that Ellie had given to her.

Lucas had been working in the café the whole afternoon with a big smile plastered on his face. Karen was a little confused, not getting where his happiness and enthusiasm was coming from, but she didn't care that much about it. It had been a long time since she had seen him smile and had seen him happy. She though his smile and happiness had faded away with Keith.

Time passed by quickly and before anyone knew, it was time to leave and go to the gym for the basketball game. Peyton was checking her messenger bag, seeing if her clothes were still as she left them. She didn't want them to be crumbled as she put them on to appear for the ones they had chosen to know about her and Lucas.

She stiffened when out of the blue she felt two lips pressed against her neck. "Lucas." She whispered when his arms slid around her waist. "We can't do this now, they'll catch us." She murmured, trying to release herself from his hold. But Lucas didn't let go of her, instead of that, his lips moved lower to her shoulders. Peyton began to battle him when she felt his hand disappear under her cheerleading skirt. "Let go Luke! Please!" She pleaded. And then a noise both interrupted them.

"Rachel, go find Peyton!" They heard Brooke scream. "Why don't you do it yourself bossy bitch!" Rachel screamed back. Quickly Lucas let go of Peyton and hid himself away in the showers. And just two seconds later, Rachel walked in. "Master bitch is searching you, so get your skinny ass out of here!" Rachel turned around and Peyton looked helpless towards Lucas, who was hidden away. "Why are you blushing? Booty calls in the locker rooms?" Peyton felt herself become uncomfortable. Rachel noticed it and almost jumped on her. "Oh gosh, is he in for a threesome?" Peyton felt the heat of her shyness reaching until behind her ears, but soon she fixed herself again. "Rachel, stop it, I am not feeling so well", hoping Rachel would stop her stupid talking. "You're pregnant to him!" she yelled. Peyton felt herself weaken again, why was Rachel such a bitch. "I am not pregnant Rachel, I even don't have a boyfriend! The only reason I am here is that I don't want to let the girls in the squad down, even if my leg is hurting so much that it feels like it is falling off my body, slut!." And with that, Peyton rushed out of the locker room.

A few minutes later the cheerleaders needed to do their new routine, Peyton took all her courage and forget about the ignoring pain in her leg when the song 'Played-A-Live' from the Safari Duo left the speakers.

The routine was dragging, and Peyton was in so much pain. She needed to persist, she wanted to show Brooke that she wasn't pathetic. But in the middle from the song, she lost the rhythm, so she needed to do her best, ten times over. When the routine was finally done, she barely could walk, placing one leg in front of the other was like an impossible thing to do. Haley and Bevin saw her struggle with it and walked over to Peyton to back her up. But as soon as Brooke saw the two helping her, she began to yell. "Haley! Bevin! Let go of that bitch immediately! If she can sleep with 'my' boyfriend, than she can walk on her own!" First they didn't want to let go of Peyton, but Peyton's big eyes pleaded that they let go of her. She didn't want to be the reason Bevin and Haley got in trouble, so they let go of her and walked over to Brooke.

Peyton was having so much trouble not falling. But another blonde cheerleader walked over to her. She carefully glided an arm around Peyton's waist and helped her while they slowly walked over to the bench. Brooke became furious and began to yell again. "Kenzie! What did I say to Bevin and Haley?! I said that you don't have to help that slut!" But Kenzie refused to let go of Peyton. "Kenzie! You're off the squad if you help her any longer!" Peyton felt the girl besides her stiffen, and then she answered Brooke with a voice full of anger. "Peyton is the one with a bullet in her leg, and today she is with us because she doesn't want to let the squad down! You could be more grateful to her! And why would you expel me? Because I try to help her?! And about Lucas! You're one to talk! Remember two years ago, you did the sa…" Brooke cut her off, her face twisted in a scared expression caused by the words Kenzie didn't speak. Peyton saw it too, but she was in too much pain to even care. "Okay, okay! Take her out of here!" Peyton looked thankful to Kenzie. "Thank you." She said softly, as Kenzie smiled. "You're welcome." And they very slowly walked over to the changing rooms.

When the first half was over, Peyton still laid in the changing rooms away from the girls. She was alone there, Kenzie left about ten minutes ago, but she was afraid that Brooke really would kick her off the squad. Peyton couldn't blame her, Kenzie was a nice girl and Peyton felt guilty about the way Brooke treated her.

She closed her eyes and tried to get some rest. Unexpectedly, she found the warmth of another body above her. She opened her eyes and met Lucas'.

"How are you doing? I saw Brooke bitching you out just before the game began." He stroked her cheek. Peyton softly smiled, she was happy that Lucas was worried about her. She quietly nodded, that boy was just too good for her. "It's okay. Brooke is just a stupid bitch. " She whispered, as Lucas smiled and pressed a soft kiss on her left cheek. "How about your leg? I also saw Brooke bitching out Bevin, Haley and that other girl who helped you." Lucas stared at the ice pack on the hurt leg. "It's fine. And yes I took my painkiller today, but I guess they are not strong enough to beat Bossy Bitchy Brooke." With a sad expression on her face, Lucas saw his beautiful girl fall into the darkness again. Suddenly, he hoisted her on his back. Peyton began to yell, and Lucas gestured she had to be quiet, but she didn't listen and kept the screaming going. In one swift motion, Lucas pressed Peyton lightly against the lockers and began to attack her neck with kisses, and with that she immediately stopped yelling.

Lucas was so into the passion that he didn't hear the noise from the crowd anymore, but Peyton did and she heard voices coming closer. "Lucas." She whispered firmly, but he ignored her, and showed more attention to her tummy. "Luke! Please!" She began to shift but Lucas still had a strong hold on her legs. "Come on, they'll catch us, and than our plan is officially screwed!" Lucas sighed and removed his lips from her skin.

"Peyton, breathe! No one will catch us, I locked the door." Peyton looked down at Lucas who winked, but she still wasn't very comfortable. Lucas saw her struggle with the mixed feelings. "Please Peyton! Enjoy it, this is the last time we'll ever sneak around. After tonight certain people will know we're together. Please Peyton, enjoy it!"

First she looked doubtful, but Lucas' blue puppy dog eyes convinced her, he was right, this was the very last time they could do this. And than she had to let go of one of the ways she felt safe about being with Lucas.

She leaned in and let Lucas' tongue play with hers. Their kisses got so intense that they both needed to gasp for air. While the kiss session continued, Lucas' hand disappeared under her skirt. "Gosh, I love cheerleaders." He whispered with a boyish, low voice. "I am sure you do." She said laughing.

They both enjoyed this intense and memorable moment, but then they heard Whiteys voice howl all over the place. "Where is that Scott boy?"

"I am here coach." Nathans voice joined the conversation.

"I don't mean that Scott boy, I am looking for your blonde brother!"

In the meantime Lucas placed Peyton carefully on the ground again and pressed a short kiss on her lips. In pure silence they said goodbye.

"I don't know where he is, coach." Nathan said.

"Than go find him!" He commanded.

"I am here coach." Lucas left the girls changing rooms.

"What the heck are you doing there?! That's the girls changing room!" Lucas could feel himself blush.

"I was a little lost. I got in there by mistake." Whitey shook his head.

"Sure you did, now get your ass back on that court."

The game went further and Peyton decided to shower. She wanted to look fresh when she appeared to Karen. Now she was all sweaty from her efforts from the last hour. She just finished putting on her underwear when the girls of the squad came in again. The first thing she heard was a nasty comment from Brooke.

"Girls, since when is our changing room a whorehouse?" But nobody laughed. Bevin and Haley looked to each other and sighed. Peyton was annoyed and wanted nothing more than be out of here, away from Brooke, in Lucas' loving arms.

Everything went fine until the jeans-issue came along again. Peyton cursed herself for not thinking of that earlier. It was so embarrassing, now she would get a whole Brooke-knows-it-better-and-you-shouldn't-have-slept-with-my-boyfriend speech. Brooke was already coming closer, but suddenly Kenzie was there again. She happily began to talk. "Oh my god! That dress is so adorable." She said and began to babble. Brooke kept hanging around five feet away from them, but after a while she was bored and lost interest in making fun of Peyton and walked away.

"God, Brooke is such a bitch! I can't believe you were best friends with her." Kenzie said.

"Yeah, me either." Peyton replied and the blond girls laughed.

"Why do you cheer when you think Brooke is a big bitch?" Peyton asked while pick up her jeans.

"I love cheerleading, and as little girl I dreamt of high school and becoming a cheerleader and Brooke is not going to take away my dream." She said resolute, Peyton smiled by her ambition.

"And you?" Kenzie asked while packing her bag.

"I actually don't love it that much, but I just want to prove Brooke wrong. And in the meantime, I get to know other people." Kenzie smiled. "And now, let's get you in your jeans."

Kenzie was very careful when she helped Peyton, she did her best not to hurt her. Peyton wondered why she didn't become friends with Kenzie earlier. She was a nice girl, she was sure they could be good friends.

It only took a couple more minutes and Peyton was ready to go to Lucas. "You look incredibly pretty Peyton." Kenzie said, and she was right. Peyton looked gorgeous in her clothes and her blond hair in curls. "Why are you so dressed up anyway?" She asked, but she thought she was being rude. "I am sorry, but I don't want to be curious."

Peyton smiled. "It's okay. Tonight is a big night for me, I am going to tell some people something very important …"

And than in walked Lucas. Kenzie looked at Peyton, the question showing in her eyes. Peyton nodded the answer, and now Kenzie was the first to know it, but Peyton knew something more. A new friendship was born.


	20. Telling Them, So They Won't Tell Further

Telling Them, So They Won't Tell Further

**Telling Them, So They Won't Tell Further **

They had left the gym, and ten minutes later, Lucas and Peyton walked across the street to his mom's café. "You look amazing. I love that jacket." Lucas whispered in Peyton's ear.

"Thank you. The jacket was Ellie's." She whispered back and leaned against Lucas' shoulder.

"How's your leg?" He asked a little later.

"Its fine, it survived Brooke, so it's fine." Lucas smiled and now they stood in front of his mother's café.

"Moment of truth", Lucas said softly and Peyton nodded in agreement. She quickly pressed a little kiss on his lips. They both walked in and made their way to his mom. Lucas squeezed Peyton's hand and let go of it and walked to his mom, who was behind the counter.

"Mom, I have to tell you something important." Lucas said and Karen turned around to look at her handsome son.

"Tell." She said while serving someone's drink.

"I want to talk to you alone actually." Karen nodded and led her son to the stock room of her café.

"Tell Lucas. Is something wrong?" Karen became worried when she saw the serious face of her only son.

"No actually not, but I want to tell you something really important. And you're the first to know about it." And at that moment Peyton walked in. Lucas took Peyton by the hand and pulled her besides him. Karen felt it coming.

"Mom, Peyton and I … we're a couple." Lucas said blissfully and pressed a kiss on Peyton's forehead who smiled a little. Karen had seen it coming, but still was speechless.

"So?" Lucas asked worried when he saw his mother's face.

"Congratulations Lucas." She said and hugged her son tightly. "And you too Peyton", as she hugged her as well. "I am so happy for you guys." There were tears in her eyes, and Lucas noticed them.

"Mom, you don't have to cry." He said softly and pulled his mother into his arms.

"It's just … I am so happy you finally found her Lucas. After all those years, you finally got her", as she looked at Peyton.

After a few minutes, Karen wanted to leave the stock room but Lucas held her back. "Please don't tell anyone else, we want to keep it quiet for a while."

Karen nodded, "I understand." The three hugged each other and than went back to the café.

"Where are Haley and Nathan?" Lucas asked his mother.

"I don't know, I guess at home. Why?"

"We're going to tell them too, so we're going to take off. I'll see you later Mom." Lucas took Peyton by the hand. "See you later Miss Roe." Peyton said as she and Lucas took her car and drove off to Nathan and Haley's apartment.

Lucas wrapped an arm around Peyton's shoulder as they walked over to their best friends' apartment. When they reached their front door, they heard screaming coming from inside. But it wasn't screams of anger or pain or sadness. It was screams of fun and pleasure, followed by laughing. Lucas looked at Peyton and then looked at the front door, and then he knocked. The laughing and screaming subsided and a half minute later, Nathan stood in the doorway, only wearing his trousers. Peyton looked at his athletic torso and in a flash, memories from her and Nathan came back. But they were soon interrupted by Nathan.

"Come in." He said and so Lucas and Peyton walked into the apartment. Shoes, socks, and other items of clothing were spread out on the floor. Both blondes shared a look and then Haley walked out of the bedroom. She only wore her underwear and the blue shirt Nathan had been wearing that day.

"Who's here?" She asked and than looked up. "Luke! Peyton!" and she began to blush and then turned around to nestle herself in her husband's arms.

"Did we interrupt something?" Lucas asked while looking at his brother and his sister-in-law.

"Maybe" Haley said quietly and buried her head against Nathan's shoulder.

"Actually, we were celebrating." Nathan said, putting his arm around Haley's waist. They both smiled bright, Haley giggled and Nathan stoked her hair lovingly.

"Celebrating what?" Peyton asked, while looking at the loving couple before her.

"Are we going to tell them already?" Haley asked whispering, Nathan nodded while giving her an amazing look, the look of the love he had for her. It was then that Haley put the two blondes before her out of their misery.

"Nathan asked me to marry him again, in front of everyone we know." She said, the happiness flowing from her face to Nathan's.

Both blondes were speechless. Peyton was the first to react. "Well congratulations you two."

Lucas nodded. "Yeah Brother and Sister-in-Law, congratulations" he said and tenderly took his best friend in his arms, stroking her long hair while she hid her face into his chest. Peyton already had Nathan in her embrace.

"Celebrating huh?" Peyton asked. "You don't change Nathan!" And playful she slapped him on the arm.

"What do you mean?" Haley asked while Lucas' arms still rested around her back. "Well, Nathan always thinks he needs to celebrate this way." Peyton said and then continued. "When we were together, after each game the Ravens won, he needed to 'celebrate' it with me. And even when the team lost, he wanted to be 'comforted' by me." Peyton stuck her tongue out.

"You horny husband" Haley said laughing and released herself out of her best friend's hold, and walked straight over to Nathan. Peyton walked over to Lucas again.

"Hunny Bunny!" Peyton shouted.

"Hey, you promised me you'd never say that in public, and you lost the right to say it altogether when we broke up." Nathan said disappointed, Peyton stuck her tongue out again at him.

"Hunny Bunny!" Nathan pouted childish as Peyton kept teasing him with is old nickname.

Haley sighed. "Okay, you two had your fun." She said pointing at the ex-couple. "And now, back to the point, how did we earn this visit?" Lucas looked to Peyton and she understood him. He placed an arm around her waist and his eyes asked her if she was ready to tell them.

"You can tell them Luke." Peyton whispered in his ear. Lucas smiled and pulled her closer to him.

"Well?" Haley asked, as Lucas smiled brighter.

"We're together." He said and kissed Peyton on the cheek. Lucas saw how Haley's eyes darkened and she went from happy to upset in just seconds. But Nathan immediately wrapped his arms around his ex-girlfriend.

"I told you. It was worth it." He pulled her so close to him that she began to smile. But the icy silence between Haley and Lucas was still there. Nathan and Peyton were too busy hugging that they didn't notice it.

"Can I steal your new girlfriend for a second, big brother?" Nathan asked, and Lucas nodded.

"Please don't hit on her. I know she's beautiful, but please be a gentleman, little brother." Lucas said and laughed. Peyton began to blush and quickly walked over to Lucas to press a short kiss on his lips. Then she followed Nathan into his bedroom, Nathan sat down on the bed and motioned for Peyton to come and sit next to him.

"Not hitting on me huh?" She asked laughing.

"I swear I am not." He replied. Silence came over them.

"See Sawyer, he was worth the risk." Peyton nodded and they hugged again.

Meanwhile, Lucas and Haley were still in the living room, neither of them had said a word.

"Are you mad at me?" Lucas asked, and Haley shook her head.

"I don't know."

Lucas was confused. "Is there another reason why you would kill me with that devilish gaze of yours?"

She closed her eyes and swallowed. "I still can't believe you Luke. You had Brooke, and she was ready to give you the world if she had to. And you go and sleep with Peyton. I still can't believe you Luke."

Lucas rolled his eyes and sighed. "I don't want to discuss it all over again Hales. Brooke definitely wasn't ready to give me the world, she didn't want to listen to me. By the way, I have chosen Peyton now, she's the right choice. I understand that your on 'Team Brooke', she's your best friend. But I also saw how you tried to help Peyton tonight." Lucas said while moving closer to Haley. She shook her head again, tears running in her eyes. "Please Hales, be happy for me. I don't want to ruin our friendship over Peyton, but I am not going to ruin my relationship with her. For the first time in years, I really feel like I made the right choice by finally giving into my feelings for Peyton. I really love her Hales, I do!"

Haley saw the look in his blue eyes, she knew that look. That was how he looked when he knew it was meant to be for him. She hadn't seen it much, but she knew the look.

Lucas saw her change completely and he knew it was in the good way. Gently he wrapped his arms protectively around her and kissed her hair. "Thank you Hales" he whispered.

Back in the bedroom, Peyton and Nathan still were talking about Peyton's lucky choice.

"God, how can I ever thank you?" Peyton asked while she looked into her ex's blue eyes.

"Well perhaps by being one of the bridesmaids in my wedding." He answered. Peyton looked shocked at first but then met his warm blue eyes again.

"I would love to!" She screamed and held him in her embrace.

"I thought you would." He said and stroked her hair. "You're going to be the best bridesmaid ever. God, I never thought you would be one of my bridesmaids." He said and Peyton answered immediately.

"Me either."

"I am going to check on my wife. I hope she accepts this situation." Peyton didn't understand what he was talking about and Nathan saw it. "Well, Haley was a little upset the last time when she heard about you two. I know Brooke is her best friend, but Lucas is her best friend too. I hope she lets go of that stupid opinion of you and Lucas. You deserve to be happy and so does Lucas, and if you make each other happy, then Haley should accept that. Brooke will find somebody else. She isn't made for Lucas, she's a girl who thinks about herself first and then thinks about others. But you, gorgeous girl" he said smiling. "You're the one for my big brother." With his arm wrapped around her shoulder, they walked into his living room again to find her boyfriend and his wife in each others embrace.

Nathan began to clap. "Finally" he said and walked over to his wife again, as Lucas let go off her and pulled Peyton in his arms.

"You two stayed way too long in that bedroom, sure you didn't hit on her bro?" Lucas asked suspiciously, Peyton turned so she could face him.

"Are you jealous, boyfriend?" She asked while smiling.

"I am not." He said in defence.

"Well, do you want to know why I was in there with him so long? Nathan asked me to be one of his bridesmaids." Peyton revealed. "Awesome, isn't? And by the way, you're the only who can do something like that with me in the bedroom." She said firmly before pressing her lips on his. Lucas greeted her lips with the same fire as hers.

After a few minutes, Nathan touched his brother's shoulder. "Can we have your attention for a minute?" He asked and laughed. Peyton shyly broke apart from Lucas as Nathan walked over to Haley again. Lucas missed her incredible touch and pulled her in front of her, her back against his chest, his crossed arms around her waist, with his hands resting on her hips.

"Nathan and I", Haley began. "We discussed about who can give a speech for us at the wedding. We thought a double speech would be original enough for us. Since Peyton knows Nathan pretty well, and Lucas knows me pretty well, and you two are a couple now, we thought that maybe you two wanted to do it."

Both blondes were amazed. "We'd love to." Lucas answered and Peyton nodded. "Sure, I can't wait." She said.

Lucas and Peyton stayed a while with Haley and Nathan. Brooke broke up that party however, calling Haley's cell phone, asking if she could pick her up. Brooke had been drinking with a few of the cheerleaders on the squad, and could no longer drive. It was lucky that Lucas and Peyton still needed to see Skills, so they said goodbye.

"Thank you Nathan. Thank you for everything." Peyton whispered in his ear as she said her farewell, almost crying, not knowing if she could ever thank this guy enough.

Lucas and Peyton drove to the Rivercourt, and found Skills shooting hoops. "Hi Luke!" Skills shouted across the court, as he saw the blonde boy walking closer to him through the darkness of night.

"You ready for a game?" Skills asked and threw the ball to Lucas, who caught it easily and threw it through the ring. Both boys laughed.

"What brings you here?" Skills asked and than saw Peyton standing against the car.

"I see." He answered his own question and Peyton walked closer. Lucas wrapped his right arm around Peyton.

"Finally a couple I see, it's about damn time man." Skills said and left the both blondes speechless. "Don't look so surprised, congratulations!" The three laughed.

Skills hugged Lucas and than Peyton.

"How's your leg girlie?" He asked.

"Fine" Peyton answered. All was quiet for a while, until Skills interrupted it.

"Well it's about damn time. Finally Luke, I thought you would stay blind forever. God, look at him, after all those years of pouting."

Peyton looked from Skills to Lucas and back to Skills.

"What do you mean?" She asked curious.

"Well, Mister White here, used to have a little crush on you since … well always. And he always was complaining and pouting that you didn't speak to him. He was totally heartbroken." He laughed, as Peyton turned to Lucas and saw him blushing.

"That's not true. I didn't complain." He said in defence.

"Oh yes you did."

"Skills, would you mind keeping this a secret. Peyton and I want to keep 'us' quiet for a little while. Not everyone has to know immediately." Lucas said as the other boy nodded.

"Anything for my best friend and his gorgeous girlfriend" he winked. "But now I am going home, it's already late."

Lucas drove Peyton to his house and led her into his room. "I want to show you something." He whispered and opened his wardrobe and took out a cardboard box. Peyton knew what it was and smiled at Lucas, who placed the box on his bed.

"Peyton, I want you to know that I never stopped thinking about you. You were always in my head, in my heart. I always loved you, I never stopped. I know I don't need to tell you false excuses why I choose Brooke over you the first time. I was a coward and I know that. But now, today, I stopped hiding myself, to be here with you by my side. You can always come over here, just to see me. Or so you can take a look at all the stuff in there", his finger pointing at the box.

Peyton began to unpack the stuff in the box. She was shocked by how much stuff he had about her. So many photos, letters, yearbooks, all the comics she had drawn that were published in THUD, mix tapes for her. He even had a little diary where he had only written things about her. When she looked at the first page, she found a photo of her and when she looked at the date, she noticed it was so long ago. Years ago he had noticed her but she didn't notice him. She began to wonder why she hadn't. The guy she wanted to grow old with had been there for years, right in front of her, and she kept choosing the wrong path to walk down. She kept making the wrong choices, kept shutting him out, kept walking away, and kept losing him to another. But now she finally had made the right choice, walked on the right path, let him in and didn't walk away because this time she wouldn't lose him again.

Lucas took the last mix tape he had made for her, it was three weeks ago and let it play. He softly sang every song from the first word to the last, as homage to Peyton. There were even songs on his mix tape that were the same as on her mix tape.

Then the song, All At Once from The Fray started to play, Lucas made his way to Peyton and sat down right in front of her.

_There are certain people you just keep coming back to_

_She is right in front of you_

_You begin to wonder could you find a better one_

_Compared to her now she's in question_

_And all at once the crowd begins to sing_

_Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same_

_Maybe you want her maybe you need her_

_Maybe you started to compare to someone not there_

_Looking for the right one you line up the world to find_

_Where no questions cross your mind_

_But she won't keep on waiting for you without a doubt_

_Much longer for you to sort it out_

_And all at once the crowd begins to sing_

_Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same_

_Maybe you want her maybe you need her_

_Maybe you started to compare to someone not there_

_Maybe you want it maybe you need it,_

_Maybe it's all you're running from,_

_Perfection will not come_

_And all at once the crowd begins to sing_

_Sometimes_

_We'd never know what's wrong without the pain_

_Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same_

_Maybe you want her maybe you need her_

_Maybe you've started to compare to someone not there_

_Maybe you want it maybe you need it_

_Maybe it's all you're running from_

_Perfection will not come_

_Maybe you want her maybe you need her_

_Maybe you had her maybe you lost her to another_

_To another_

He sang for her, off-key, but she didn't care. Tears streamed down her face and she couldn't stop. The tears kept coming, as she realized he had been aching for her more than she even wanted to admit.

Lucas softly took her in his arms and kissed her forehead, trying to soothe her, knowing she was so emotional, especially after 'life changing' moments of today. She was letting go of her security, and it was hard for her.

Lucas knew it was going to be tough for Peyton, pulling her out of her safe world and putting her out in this big 'mad' world. But he knew they needed to take risks for their relationship. Lucas also knew she would be willing to take those risks as long as she knew it was worth it. Peyton knew it was worth the risk, to let go off everything she knew and to start over again. To face almost everything she was afraid of.

The hours of night passed by while Lucas and Peyton talked, enjoyed the music and each other, just resting next to each other. When the dawn broke through, Peyton got up.

"Lucas, we need to go." She said, and Lucas opened his eyes confused.

"We?" he asked while yawn the sleep away.

"Yes, 'we' boyfriend. I want you to meet somebody, but I first need to go home." Lucas got up, watching the numbers of his digital clock change. It was not even 7 A.M. on a Sunday morning.

He drove Peyton back to her house and she vanished through the front door. Twenty minutes later she was back again, wearing a white dress with pink-orange silken flowers sewed on it. The dress stopped just above Peyton's knees and she wore white high heels. There was still plaster on her gun shot wound. Lucas thought that she looked beautiful in that dress, like a schoolgirl in spring time, even if it looked a little old-fashioned. "Are we going to visit the president?" He asked, because Peyton had made Lucas to wear something descent also.

He followed Peyton's directions and they ended up in the cemetery. "Okay, you want to introduce me to somebody here?" He asked, not getting what was going on in Peyton's head. She almost dragged him after her, as she walked quickly in her high heels. Then it hit Lucas, the moment they approached the gravestone, with the three precious words on it. Those words spelt out the name of a woman, her mother.

Peyton bent down and pressed a kiss on the cold stone. "Hi mom" she said softly. Lucas heard something different in her voice, the real sound of loss, as Peyton stood amongst the others who were taken away from their loved ones.

"Look what I got." She said and held her arm high, so a beautiful silver ring could see, one that Lucas hadn't even noticed it. "I promised I would mom. Even though I was so little, I promised you I'd wear your engagement ring and the dress you wore to your engagement party." Lucas looked down to Peyton, not understanding what she was talking about.

She stood up again and rested her head against Lucas' shoulder. "So Mom, this is Lucas Scott. You know who he is, the guy I've been talking to you about for the last two years. The one I was crying here about because I was so in love with him, but things got screwed up. But see Mom, now he's here by my side. I did it, I finally did admit that I loved him. Love him." Tears were now flooding her eyes.

"See, he's the one. The one, like dad was for you. See, I am wearing the dress, and the ring. I promised you as little girl, if I found the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and I was sure, this dress and your ring would show you I was ready for the one, and here he is." She swallowed her tears away, but her voice was already broken.

"He's the one mom. Can he be?" She asked. "Do you think he is? Mommy, is Lucas the one for me? Because I feel it my heart, but do you?" She asked, not able to hold back her tears any longer. Lucas took Peyton in his arms, softly stroking her back and making soothing sounds just beside her ear. Even though he was confused by this sudden scene, he couldn't do anything else other than give her refuge in his arms.

Suddenly a beautiful bird flew over to the grave and sat down. Peyton looked at the bird and began to cry more heavily, as her whole fragile body trembled.

"Peyton?" Lucas whispered worried. "Peyton?"

She swallowed and made out between the sobs, "She said yes Luke."

Lucas was even more confused. "What do you mean Peyton?"

She smiled through her tears. "She said you're the one for me. Look at the bird, she loved those birds. It's her sign." She whispered and Lucas smiled genuinely.

"Miss Sawyer. It's Lucas Scott here." He said, still a little uncomfortable. "Thank you for sending this sign to us. This means the world to Peyton and me. I promise you, I love your daughter and I'll never hurt her again."

Peyton smiled so bright, it made Lucas warm inside. "Would you mind leaving me alone for a second Luke?" Peyton asked, and then he nodded and pressed a kiss on her forehead and walked over to Keith's grave.

"Thank you mom" Peyton whispered to the grave. "It means the world to me, and I wished you could be here to meet him. He's great and cute, isn't he? Please say hi to Ellie for me, and tell her the happy news." She stayed there a little longer and then walked over to Keith's grave, and Lucas immediately wrapped his arms around her.

"Keith, I want to tell you something. As you see, I am standing here with Peyton." He took a deep breath. "We are finally together. You always said I needed to follow my heart, and for the first time besides basketball, I finally did. It led me back to her, where it all began." He smiled and pulled her closer to him, closer than was even possible. "Thank you Keith. I miss you, and I love you and so does Mom … Dad." He whispered and bent down to press a little kiss on the grave, as he was fighting against his own tears. One escaped and Peyton just kissed it away.

Lucas and Peyton walked away and drove home together. They felt different now, now that they had told those people that mattered most what was going on between them. Their love was the renewed promise that neither of them would ever let each other go again.

This promise was worth keeping. This promise was worth the all the risks. This promise was worth a brand new world.

Their world.


	21. TeasingToPlease,It'sASimpleKindOfLovely

Teasing To Please, It's a Simple Kind Of Lovely

**Teasing To Please, It's a Simple Kind Of Lovely**

It was Saturday afternoon, and today, it was two weeks after Lucas and Peyton told a few people they were together. Peyton was happy that Lucas convinced her to do that, a whole weight was taken off her shoulders. The only one left over was Larry, her dad. Peyton wanted to tell her dad now, at this moment, just call him and shout it out. But she decided to wait, she rather wanted to tell him it in person. She wanted to see the reaction on his face as she told him and told him over her mother's sign.

Soft music from Peyton's various mix tapes made their way through her room and escaped under her bedroom door to let the rest of her house be drowned in the music. Peyton was drawing on her desk while Lucas was reading a book on her bed. From time to time his eyes strayed off to the drawing Peyton. He loved to watch her when she was drawing, she could let herself slip away in her mind, in another world, away from every real thing that excited around her. She was so full of passion and so concentrated when she draw, it seemed to be her escape, her sweet escape from the misery.

Lucas read further in his book, but he wasn't able to read many pages, the beautiful blonde girl distracted him. Even it was a very good book, he couldn't do about it. He even wasn't on page thirty of his book, and he had chosen it yesterday morning at home. He was running late yesterday, he had to hurry when he made his bag to stay by Peyton in the weekend.

That was what they had agreed with his mom. During the school week Lucas stayed with his mom, and most of the time Peyton was also by Lucas and in the weekends the couple could stay in Peyton's house. Karen wanted them to be with her during the school week, so she could look after them. Making sure they made their homework and studied enough. And if they had a lot homework or a lot to study, Karen gently asked Peyton to go home so she wouldn't distract Lucas and Lucas wouldn't distract her.

Today was their lazy day, yesterday evening they had cleaned her house together so today they could be a little lazy and do some homework and finish everything tomorrow. They planned everything and told it to Karen, so she didn't had to worry about school. Karen also had made Lucas promise he would 'safe' with Peyton, not risking the whole pregnancy scare drama for the third time in less than two years.

Once in a while, Peyton's eyes and mind snapped out of her drawing mode and looked at Lucas while he was reading. She thought he was cute when he read. He had this unknown habit to bite on his lower lip when things got dramatic. He licked his lips when scenes got hot. And his eyes made different expressions so Peyton could almost read on his face what the mood was from the chapter he was reading.

And then, the music of Cheap Trick began to play. Peyton softly began to sing. "I want you to want me. I need you to need me. I'd love you to love me. I'm beggin' you to beg me." She got up from her chair and began to dance before the bed. Lucas looked up to see what she was doing and found her swaying before him. He laughed, for him it was pure enjoyment. She smiled, knowing he liked what she was doing. She kept singing and threw seductive looks to him. Her hips making circles, inviting him to come over to her, like he gladly did. He placed his hands on her lower back and pulled her against him, moving with her. Leaning in and teasing while capturing her lips and just a second after that, making his lips disappear again. Turning Peyton on and making her willing to please the blond boy who danced with her. They continued singing together while their hands explored each others bodies. When the song almost ended, Peyton pushed Lucas towards the bed. She quickly took her sweater off and made her way on top of Lucas, kissing him. Her lips travelling lower to his shoulder, making that he needed to lie down. Peyton quickly took his shirt off so she could admire his bare athletic torso, kissing every part of it with much care and devotion, causing to make him shift beneath her. He groaned out loud when her lips reached his underwear.

Now Lucas decided to take the lead, flipping her over so she was pinned beneath him. His full lips kissing from her jaw line all the way down to her belly button. Peyton moaned out how good it felt. Excited she stripped her jeans and after that his. Moving against one another, continuing kissing and touching. But suddenly Lucas pulled back, leaving a moaning Peyton waiting. When he didn't return, she shifted herself and she reached to the drawer of the cupboard besides her bed. Her hand disappeared and than she took a condom out of it and handing him. She assumed that it was bothering him, she had heard his conversation with his mom. Karen asked Lucas a several times to be careful and to be 'safe' with her, noting wanting to repeat history.

But he didn't return to her. "Come on Luke!" She groaned. "You can't turn a girl on like this, and than let her waiting. That's not gentle, gentleman." She pouted. Lucas shook his head but Peyton's hands reached behind her to unhook her bra, Lucas stopped her. "Don't you want me?" She panted hurt. Lucas shook his head gently.

"It's not that, Peyton." He said and threw the condom back into the drawer. "Sure I want you, God I do." Softly his warm hand stroked over her cheek. "I am aware of our sexual attraction, it's there, and it's pretty hard to deny it. But I want this to be more special." Question marks appeared in her green eyes. "I want our first time to be special, not an activity because we're bored on an afternoon." She made her way from underneath him and sat up against the cool wood from the bed.

"But this isn't exactly our 'first time' Luke." She said uncomfortable and he nodded.

"I know, but you know what I mean. Our first time together as a couple, without the hurt and the confusion, without hurting other people. I want it to be special Peyton, something we never forget, a night to remember. I rather want to wait. You want to wait until you're sure about 'us' before you tell everyone were together, so I want to wait with having sex until I know you're sure we can make things work."

Peyton stayed quiet for a while, letting everything what Lucas said drown in her mind. She knew he was right, and she was willing to wait. Lucas had done so much for her, agreed with her plan about only telling a few people, even if he wanted to tell the world they were together. Now it was her turn to do what he asked her. And besides, she thought the waiting would be fun and it would be defiantly worth it.

"Peyton? Peyton?" Lucas asked while he saw Peyton far drowned into her mind, when she saw the two blue eyes that matched with the voice, she immediately snapped out of it.

"Yeah, here." She said smiling, and Lucas smiled too. "Luke?" She asked innocent. He nodded.

"What Peyton?" She placed herself before him.

"Does that mean we can't do other stuff anymore?" She asked and her voice sounded so innocent.

"What other stuff?" He asked while Peyton crawled closer to him and took place on his lap.

"Like shower together?" She whispered in his ear, Lucas moaned while Peyton's fingers stroked his bare chest.

"Well I can consider it." He whispered back with his boyish voice that sounded so sexy to her that shivers ran through her whole body. She ran into her bathroom followed by Lucas.

Quickly Lucas stripped of his shirt and was eagerly working on his pants as he notices the way Peyton is smiling at him. "What?" He blurts out, stopping his actions abruptly.

"Weren't you the one who said that we were going to take it slow?" Peyton stated while she slowly unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans. She left Lucas standing there with not a world that flew across his mind that could be a useful answer.

He just stood there, watching how his girlfriend slowly undressed herself. First her pair of jeans had to go, then her pair of grey Emily the Strange socks where slipped off her feet. Her sweater was already thrown in a corner since she had removed it earlier. After that her tank top had to go to. She was about to unhook her bra when she noticed Lucas hadn't made any progress yet.

"Do you need some help?" She asked, barely able to hide smile. She didn't give him much time to answer when she started to fumble on his sweater. "Raise your arms Luke." She said when he only looked stunned at her. He quickly did and let her shed the sweater of his body. His tee shared the same fate. Then she came to his wife beater. A little absentminded she traced the figures of his muscles through the thin white fabric. She sighed as rested her head against his chest, dreaming away. But quickly she noticed the uneven way his chest rose and fell, and also how his breaths grew laboured.

Peyton looked up at him, in her green, wide eyes grew a seductive gaze. Even through she looked so confident, inside the nervousness grew slightly. But it soon faded when she looked deeper into his blue eyes, the blue that always knew how to comfort her.

Sensually she brought his big hands up to her shoulders and almost immediately his warm fingers slipped underneath the straps of her simple bra. While his hands removed the straps Peyton unhooked the bra and it a matter of seconds the undergarment fell to the ground.

A little doubt lingered over them when they were left behind in only their underpants. Lucas decided to take the lead on this and took off his boxers, letting him be the first be all naked and exposed. Peyton soon followed.

Lucas turned on the spray and leaded them both under it. This felt so suddenly comfortable. Peyton began to massage Lucas' body with the soap. Swiftly she noticed Lucas very comfortable with this when she reached his abdomen and felt a hardness stray against her tight.

Even through the pouring water she could see his deep red blush but she just simply smiled. "Hello there." She husked and ran a finger over his length.

"Peyton." He whispered sudden uncomfortable, uneasy he shrugged his shoulders.

"It's okay." She whispered back, letting the finger run over his length again. "I'll help you." She added with a wicked grin.

Immediately she did what she said, taking his throbbing erection into her hand, working him up. She based the rhythm of her movements on his breathing.

"Peyton." He groaned. "Peyton." He breathed heavily and it wasn't hard to guess he was on the edge of his orgasm. "Peyton. Please stop." He whimpered.

"Why?" She breathed and her hands moved even swifter.

An animal like sound escaped from his full lips and Peyton felt why. His seed spilled on her tummy.

"Oh." She brought out innocent but her smile was naught. "It's a good thing I still have to be washed." She said, stroking over Lucas broad shoulders. And Lucas immediately began at his task.

By the time he had completed his task they had run out of warm water. They both got dressed again but Lucas was earlier ready than Peyton so he kept hanging around in her bathroom while she dressed up. A little white box caught his attention, it was the box with Peyton's painkillers in it. Or at least they should be, the box was empty.

"How's your leg Blondie?" He asked, observing Peyton through the mirror.

"Fine." She answered and was busy with trying to get her pants on. It all went very well but when it looked that she would finally make it, it went wrong again. She lost her balance and Lucas caught her just in time before she would smack on the ground.

"Sure about that?" He asked, helping her to stand up again and then helped her getting into her pants again. Peyton thanked him with a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. She walked out of the bedroom and went drawing again. Lucas stood in the doorway and watched her for a few minutes, and then he slowly walked over to Peyton and lay his hands on her shoulders. He softly and tenderly began to massage her shoulders, Peyton moaned softly and dropped her pencil while he continued. She completely relaxed under his touch.

"You need to go to the doctor again, it's been longer than two weeks now, and you have no painkillers left over I noticed." Peyton looked up to him.

"Do I really have to? I rather want to wait until my dad is back." Lucas sighed and stopped massaging.

"It's still a few weeks Peyton. The doctor said you needed to come by for a check up in two weeks, now it's time." She looked away from him but realized it wasn't worth to make a big deal out of it. She got up and took her bag.

"Let's go!" She said and Lucas followed her to her car. In the waiting room Peyton lay her head against Lucas' shoulder who sat next to her. Lucas' attendance was good for her, so she didn't feel like she had to do this all alone. It made it less worse, less scary.

"Miss Peyton Sawyer." A woman stood in the hall, Lucas guessed she was in her thirties.

"Here." Peyton said and got up and Lucas followed her. Peyton was more comfortable than the last time, but she knew this doctor and she was female. She always told everything straight away, Peyton liked that.

"You've been here two weeks ago because there was something wrong with the new medication for your leg?" She asked while thumbing through Peyton's file. Peyton nodded. "We've got the results from your tests and now we knew why you were sick. There is a matter in that medication you're allergic to and you reacted pretty heavy on it, and the stress you were in wasn't healthy either. Here's the name from the matter." And she passed Peyton a note and she read it in silence. Peyton couldn't even spell the name, she passed it to Lucas who read it and than putted it away in Peyton's bag. The doctor examined Peyton, doing a normal routine.

Checking her ears, her eyes, listened to her heartbeats and stuff.

"I want to take a look to your leg again, would you mind to take your pants off?" The doctor asked, Peyton shook her head and stood up again from the table again. The doctor's eyes looked to Lucas and before she could even say something Peyton answered her question that she even didn't ask.

"He can stay." She said and quickly took her pants off. Carefully the woman looked at Peyton's leg, touching around the actual wound, seeing how Peyton reacted. She said the wound was healing good, it would be a scar, but not so big. When Peyton wanted to dress again, the doctor interrupted her.

"Would you mind to take place on the scales?" She asked, Peyton shook her head and did what her doctor asked her. After that she could dress again. When she sat again, next to Lucas, she saw the worried face of the woman before her.

"Is there something wrong, doctor?" Peyton asked worried. The doctor looked up from her computer screen.

"What's your weight Peyton?" She asked, and Peyton thought.

"I don't really know." She answered. "I do." Continued the doctor.

"I add up your BMI, it's 17. That's low Peyton." Peyton looked to Lucas and back. The doctor continued. "You've lost weight since the shooting, and it worries me." She looked up to Peyton who looked a little guilty. "Is there something wrong at home, or just something wrong in general, something you worry about?" The woman asked and Peyton shook her head. "

"No, everything is just different." The doctor asked a few more things and than looked at her computer screen again.

"Peyton, I know you're always have been thin, it's something about your genes. But now I am worried. Your BMI should be 18 or higher. You're under it."

"Not much." Peyton protested. "But you're under it, Peyton. You really need to put on weight, until your BMI is high enough again. You look way too skinny Peyton." She said while she saw the blond teenage girl before her desk pouting. "I'll expect you back here in a month and if your dad is home again, he should contact me. I need to discuss some things with him." Peyton nodded and then stood up. The doctor shook hands with Peyton and Lucas and they headed home again.

Lucas had pizza being delivered and that was Peyton's and his dinner, they rented a movie and watched it. It was a thriller, Peyton loved it so she could crawl closer to him when things got scary, and Lucas loved it that he could hold her in his arms. Lucas began to make out session with Peyton when the movie was almost over. Lucas kissed her on all her weak spots he already had discovered. She moaned and enjoyed it and wanted more but suddenly Lucas was away.

"Lucas?!" She heard him running upstairs, Peyton ran upstairs to find her bedroom door locked. "Lucas!" She screamed. "What do you think that you're doing?!" She screamed, and on the other side of the door was Lucas smiling.

"Be patient Blondie." Was the only thing he said. Five minutes later Peyton was still knocking on her bedroom door.

"Lucas! That's my room!" She kept knocking and her hand began to hurt.

"The key is right beside you, on the window-ledge." Peyton sighed angry opened the door, she wanted revenge.

"Get your ass out of my bed. You can sleep on the floor tonight." She jumped on the bed and tried to push him out of it. But unfortunately for Peyton, she was not strong enough.

"Don't be so harsh darling." Lucas whispered but Peyton took his pillow and throw it on the ground.

"You can sleep on the ground." She said, her look could have killed him, but Lucas didn't notice 'cause it was dark in her room. Suddenly Lucas took Peyton's head between his hands and forced his lips on hers. Peyton wanted to pull away but Lucas knew how to persuade her. His lips moved from her mouth, to her cheek, to her temple and then he let his tongue glide just behind her earlobe. Peyton moaned and made her way to Lucas' lips. Her anger was replaced by passion. Softly Lucas pushed her head down so she could caress his neck with her velvet lips. When her lips travelled lower to his chest, she tasted something sweet there. Confused she turned on the light on her nightstand and found Lucas' chest covered with whipped cream.

"Luke?" She asked perplexed. "What the hell…?" Lucas interrupted her.

"Come on Peyton. You're going to love it." She wanted to pull away from him but he took hold of her arm.

"Luke?" She asked when he putted whipped cream on her arm. "Lucas, what do you think you're doing?" But she stopped when Lucas slowly and sensually began to lick the cream of her arm. She couldn't help it and moaned, Lucas smiled and then kissed her lips again. As the kiss ended, Peyton licked her lips, removing the left over whipped cream with her tongue. She finally got into it and slowly began to lick the whipped cream of Lucas' chest. He shifted when she did that, she tickled him with the movements of her lips and tongue.

A while later, Lucas and Peyton rested together in her bed under the sheets. Lucas had his arms around her waist and rested his head against her shoulder. Every once in a while Lucas pressed a tender kiss to Peyton's neck. Every time she wanted to turn around to look at him, he pulled away and pretended to be asleep. And every time he kissed her, he left his lips on her skin a little longer. Peyton got a little irritated by Lucas' behaviour, she desperately wanted to be touched by him. When Lucas placed his lips again on her skin and pulled away when she wanted to turn around so she could kiss him. She worked her way out of his embrace and stood up and turned on the light.

"You're so mean!" She complained pouting.

"Yeah, mean is my middle name." Lucas said full of triumph and also stood up. Peyton began to sway with her finger and pointed to Lucas.

"I thought that your middle name was Eugene!" She said with voice full of fake innocence. Lucas' mouth fell open.

"You'd better run." He threaded and Peyton began to run, but unfortunately for her Lucas caught her after a few seconds.

"Who's mean?" He asked when he tickled her. Peyton writhed but Lucas was way too strong for her.

"You!" She screamed.

"Who?" He asked and began to tickle her harder. "You!" She persevered. Lucas stopped a second.

"You're right." Peyton sighed relieved and took a deep breath, and didn't expect what he said after that.

"But you're so much meaner." And began to tickle her again.

"Stop Lucas! Stop!" She yelled breathless.

"Who's mean?" He asked again.

"Me!" She replied, finally giving up. Lucas let go of the breathless Peyton and pressed a loving kiss on her forehead.

"Come on, now it's really sleeping time." Lucas said and they both returned to the bed. After making themselves comfortable and a long and adoring goodnight kiss, they fell asleep in each others arms to wake up by the next dawn full of surprises.


	22. Caught In a Moment

Caught In A Moment, Somehow, Everywhere And In Between

_**A/**__**N: Here I am again. And again I have a question. I am looking for a beta-reader for this story. My beta-reader is busy with school at the moment so she's only able to work on my other story. So now my question is, is there someone who's interested to be my beta-reader for this story? If anyone wants to, let me now through a review or a PM. Thanks already. Much love … Veronique**_

**Caught In A Moment, Somehow, Everywhere And In Between**

The hours passed the time of morning already a while ago when Lucas and Peyton still laid in her bed against one another. Both awake, but not talking, only enjoying each others company in silence when the sun lighted up the room. Everything from their early breakfast on her desk. And now just enjoying the great feeling of being together after an almost two year journey.

They had been this way for more than an hour and half now, just after Kenzie brought a quick little visit on Peyton's door. She returned some CD's she borrowed from Peyton. In the two weeks Kenzie had visit her already five times. They were building on a beautiful friendship, they had become pretty close already. Peyton hadn't realized before how much she missed the girly thing. But Kenzie filled that empty space in her life, she wasn't Brooke, but she was more than okay. Brooke was irreplaceable, but Kenzie was also irreplaceable for Peyton by now. She wasn't a blond cheerleader bimbo, like she would have thought years ago. No, totally not, Kenzie had interests for things that you wouldn't expect from an average cheerleader. It wasn't all about the appearance, the make-up, the routines, the popularity and the cool girlfriends and boyfriends.

Peyton was surprised when she found out Kenzie had the same taste in movies as her, that she listened to some of groups and singers like she did. It wasn't the rough stuff, but just the groups you didn't expect she would listen to. She wasn't the typical girly-cheery music listener, and Peyton was glad she wasn't. Peyton also had been by Kenzie's house, she had forgotten her jacket by Peyton so she needed to return it. Then she also had met Kenzie's parents, they were nice people.

Kenzie had been surprised when Peyton answered the door in only her underwear and one of her father's flannel shirts. Peyton quickly explained what happened the day before and both girls had giggled. Kenzie also knew how things were between Peyton and Lucas, she had promised not to tell anyone else from the squad and Peyton knew that she could trust her.

Back upstairs, Peyton lay between Lucas' spread legs, her back against his chest, her head resting against his shoulder. Softly his hand travels from her cheek, lower to her shoulder, slightly pushing away the flannel shirt when his fingers made a way between her breasts. Peyton moaned quietly when his finger circled around her belly button and stopped when they felt the silken briefs.

Tenderly his skilful fingers tried to move away the soft material, but Peyton stopped him by shifting her body.

"Lucas." She said soft but resolute, but he insisted and tried again. "Luke." It sounded firmer this time.

"Come on Peyton." He whispered back to her, his lips glided against her shoulder. "We're alone, and besides, you can't deny it, you and I know you want it." She knew he was right, this felt great, but somehow something was bothering her about it.

He had touched Brooke this way too, just the thought of that made her feel weird. Peyton really wanted to make love to Lucas in the near future, the thought of them finally as one together, as a real couple with nothing that held them back, it really made her feel happy. But she kept hearing Brookes voice inside her head, telling her that she was whore, a bad friend, that what she was doing was wrong, that she had stolen Lucas from her. Also Peyton was afraid that she couldn't control herself and she would make Lucas cross his lines early than agreed. And she couldn't do that to him.

Peyton was so lost in her thought and Lucas felt her resistance weaken, it was his chance to take control. With a stir of pleasure Peyton was introduced to the world around her again when Lucas' fingers touched her where she wanted to be touched the most. Slowly a finger made its way into her wetness, making Peyton burry her teeth into her lower lip to suppress a moan. Lucas smirked against her neck. Then he added another finger, making Peyton suck in a breath. God, it felt good. Also couldn't stifle a groan when he began unhurried rhythm. Little moans and groans kept slipping from her lips, his touch simply felt too amazing, and Lucas Scott certainly knew what he was doing. He made Brooke's voice in Peyton's head disappear.

Peyton and Lucas both got lost in their sensation, so deep drowned under that they didn't realize they were not alone in the room. Peyton was the first to notice there was a third person. When she opened her eyes, she met the ones of an older man. She could tell he was shocked, and not only a little.

"Dad!" She reacted surprised.

With that word, also Lucas stopped with what he was doing. Peyton wanted to continue saying something to her dad but he already was going downstairs. "Damn!" She cursed and buried her head into her hands.

"God, stupid girl." She began to blame herself. Gently Lucas took Peyton back into his arms, still shocked.

"It's okay Peyton, it's not that bad." He tried to reassure her, even he also was trying to believe what his eyes just has seen, but Peyton shook her head, jumped out the bed and ran downstairs.

"Daddy!" She yelled when she didn't see him.

"Dad." Larry walked into the hallway were his daughter was standing. His eyes got this 'And-What-Is-Your-Explanation-,-I-Hope-He's-Original'-look, typical for parents.

"I didn't expect you home so early." Was the only she could bring out, nervously she tugged at the sleeves of the flannel shirt.

"Yeah, that I could have told you too." He growled.

A very uncomfortable silence filled the hallway of the Sawyer residence.

"Is that my shirt?" He asked when his eyebrows raised surprised.

"Oh god, sorry." She murmured and was about to take the shirt off when Larry realised that she wasn't wearing anything more than her panties.

"Stop." He said quickly when she almost showed too much for a farther to see. She was so ashamed that she totally had forgotten what he meant. Her eyes questioned him and he nodded at her and than she understood what he intended.

"Sorry." She blushed again. They both didn't say a word but soon Larry interrupted Peyton's thoughts.

"What was that blond Scott boy doing in your bed?" He asked, Peyton looked at the floor.

"Well, Lucas was… euh … we were … well … you know…" Larry interrupted his daughter, knowing this wasn't easy for her and it was painful to tell, and actually embarrassing for them both.

"It's okay Peyton, I know this makes the two of us uncomfortable and you're feeling really bad right now. It's just ..." He stopped, trying to find the right words to say this. "I just don't … didn't expect to come home and find out that Rake Boy was 'Brooking' you. It was a kind of a surprise for me."

Peyton still looked to the floor, and Larry saw the guilty look on her face.

"Please tell me that he and Brooke are broken up this time." Peyton finally looked but before she could answer, she heard a voice coming from the stairs.

"Yes Mister Sawyer, Brooke and I aren't together anymore." Peyton turned around to find Lucas already downstairs, wearing his sweatpants and a T-shirt. He walked to her and pulled his arms around her waist. It made Peyton feel comfortable but also uncomfortable at the same time.

"I assume you two are together?" Larry asked after he had looked to the blond teens before him for a while. They both nodded. Peyton felt terrible, this wasn't exactly the way she had planned to tell her dad. Lucas felt how tense Peyton's body was, and soothingly he began to rub her shoulders and pressed a fast kiss on her hair.

"Now you two." Larry said pointing to his daughter and her boyfriend. "Go and make yourself decent." Both blonds ran upstairs and to Peyton's room. When Peyton wanted to take the shirt off, she suddenly felt herself uncomfortable in Lucas' proximity, his eyes on her body. Lucas noticed it and walked into the bathroom to give her a little more privacy.

After a few minutes Peyton entered the bathroom as well. She was wearing the white dress with the orange flowers from her mother again.

"This is so embarrassing." She said to Lucas while she brushed her hair.

"Never been caught before?" Lucas asked and buttoned his blue shirt.

"Not really. You?" She replied and looked through the mirror to Lucas who was busy with his shoes.

"A couple of times, not when I was really 'doing' it, but mostly I was pretty near." He thought back to the time Keith had surprised him by walking in when he was busy with Brooke.

Peyton was busy with her hair, and she was paying extremely much attention to her blond curls. With a hairpin she held back a few curly wisps and the rest of her curly hair was dancing around her shoulders.

"Nathan and me, a few times we were on the edge of getting caught. I remember one thing pretty clearly. I was showering with Nathan, and actually we were doing it, and my dad was in the bathroom getting ready to go to a party, and he even didn't know Nathan was with me." Carefully she brought her make-up on and Lucas watched how his beautiful girlfriend criticized herself in the mirror. But she wasn't satisfied, and she kept turning around, pulling back her hair and checking her make-up. It really made Lucas nervous.

"Peyton, you look great." He said, stood up and walked behind her so they could see themselves in the mirror.

"Do you think?" She asked and he nodded smiling. "Do I look a little like this?" She handed him an old picture, the girl on it looked just like Peyton now. He realized it was photo of Peyton's mom on her engagement party. Peyton had done her hair in exactly the same way then her mom then.

"You look just like her." He said softly, pressing a kiss on her cheek.

"Really?" She asked, somehow nervous and shy.

"You do Peyton, you look gorgeous, she would be really proud of you." A single tear escaped Peyton's green eye. "It's okay, you look amazing." He whispered reassuring and pressed a tender kiss on her left cheek with the lost tear on it. Then he pulled her in his arms and stroked her back for a while. "Come on. Let's face your dad." He said and they both walked downstairs.

They found Larry in the living room reading the newspaper. "Hi dad." She said and the older man looked up. He was startled when he saw her standing there, in the dress from his late wife. She almost was a perfect copy of her. Tears stood in his eyes.

"Daddy, do you remember when I first wore this dress?" She asked a little nervous. Larry nodded, sure, and he clearly remembered when she did that the first time.

"I do honey, it was the day after your seventh birthday. You were with your mom in our bedroom looking in her closet, and that dress immediately caught your attention. You began to ask your mom why she bought it and why she didn't wear it. You thought it was stupid to let something so beautiful in your closet and not wear it." Lucas could hear everything, he was in the hallway but could hear Larry and Peyton talk.

"And she told me that she wore it on your engagement party. And she thought it was so special for her, that she didn't want to wear it just a random dress." Larry nodded and memories came back, memories from his engagement party.

"And I also remember that you have run around in it for more than a week, your mom was really desperate because you didn't want to shower anymore." He laughed and Peyton began to blush.

"Daddy, do you remember what she made me promise her?" The older man thought again. "That you would wear the dress as you introduced the man to us you want to marry with." He said and after a few seconds he really got what his daughter meant now. She walked to the hallway and asked Lucas to come into the living room. He looked handsome, Peyton thought. He was definitely the guy she wanted to marry one day.

"Dad, I found the boy I want to marry with." She said softly while she looked to Lucas and than back to her father. "It's Lucas, after all, it's Lucas. And mom said he is the one." Tears were forming behind her hazel eyes. "

She said?" Larry asked confused. Peyton began to tell about her visit to the cemetery and how she had introduced Lucas to her mom and how she had asked her if he could be the one.

"And after I asked her if Lucas could be the one, her favourite bird sat down on her grave. She said yes, dad, she said yes!" Peyton began to cry, and also Larry struggled to fight against his tears.

"Come here sweetheart." He whispered and took his daughter on his lap. Gently he stroked her back while she sobbed against his chest.

"She said yes daddy." She whispered again while tears kept escaping form her eyes. And now Larry couldn't stop it anymore and let a few tears get away.

"And I agree with her, sweetheart." He whispered in her ear. Father and daughter cried in each others arms, crying for the woman they both had loved so much.

Lucas had tears in his eyes, and this was a moment he would never forget, not in his entire life. In silence he took his cell phone and took a picture of his girlfriend and her father.

After a few minutes, Larry let go of his daughter, and now it was Lucas turn to hug Peyton. Her eyes were swollen and red, her make-up was ruined, but she didn't care how she looked. Lucas held the blond girl in his embrace and soothed her tenderly. After a while she let Lucas and her father alone and went to the bathroom to fix her make-up.

Both men sat down on the big table in the living room. Lucas still felt himself uncomfortable about what happened just a few hours ago. Larry saw how the young man before him didn't know how to act.

"It's okay Lucas. Maybe you don't believe it, but once I had your age and I knew how I was. It's fine." He said and Lucas looked up. "I know it's embarrassing for the three of us. Just be careful okay?" Lucas nodded.

"I will Larry." He answered. "I hope you will, 'cause I don't want you to hurt my little girl again. You have caused her enough pain, I swear, if you hurt her again. I'll rake you down, Rake Boy." And the serious tone in his voice got a little lighter.

Then Peyton walked in again, she still looked like amazing. She joined them and a few hours went by talking.

"One quick little question." Larry said. "I hope you two have no plans to marry anytime soon. Because I won't agree with that, and I think neither Lucas' mom." Peyton laughed.

"No dad, I'm going to marry Lucas one day, but it's not anytime soon. We'll wait a few years." The conversation continued. Peyton and Lucas learned why Larry was home earlier and they told Larry what happened in the meantime, how they got together. The hours flew by fast, and before they knew it, it was already evening.

"What about we go out for dinner?" Larry asked and the couple before him nodded in agreement. Larry went upstairs to change his cloths and refresh himself. After he was back again, Peyton decided to change her shoes, she knew she couldn't walk that far in high heels. When she had left the room Larry walked over to Lucas.

"I know it's actually none of my business. But the amount of whipped cream and chocolate on Peyton's nightstand and on the sheets leaves me with questions. I know Peyton doesn't eat candy so much." Lucas began to blush.

"Oh yeah, that." He said. "Have you noticed how thin Peyton is?" He asked Larry and Larry nodded. "We went to the doctor for a check-up for a leg. And the doctor noticed Peyton has lost weight since the shooting, and it's not that healthy. So she needs to put on weight, and I am trying to make it a little more fun for her." "And for you." Larry answered smiling. "It's okay, Lucas, don't worry about it."

It was about three minutes walking from the parking place to the restaurant, and a several times guys whistled to Peyton. It made her feel good but also bad on the same time. It made her feel good that other guys thought she was attractive but on the other side, she was with Lucas now, and she loved him so much. It was funny to see how jealous and protective he reacted, and every time someone whistled he pressed her closer to him. When they finally arrived by the restaurant, Peyton and Lucas almost looked as one person because Lucas had pulled her so close to him.

The dinner was delicious, and Peyton really enjoyed the time with Lucas and her father. It was good that they got along so well. It was important for Peyton and for the future. When the left the restaurant again, a group of boys began to whistle again. Lucas couldn't take it anymore and pulled Peyton close to him and pressed his lips on hers. First she didn't know how to react, his father stood almost next to her. When he forcefully pressed his hips against hers she softly let herself go. She knew he wanted to teach those guys a lesson, Peyton was his and he would show them she was. Their kiss grew into one with visible tongue and hands grabbing for every curve of the other's body. Peyton moaned loud intentionally and when Lucas broke it off, the guys were staring at them with their mouth open. "Mmm, baby, you know what turns me on. I can't wait for tonight, I hope that it as naughty as yesterday." She said extremely loud and the boys dropped off disappointed. Lucas and Peyton laughed and than joined Larry again.

Later at home Peyton and Lucas lay on the couch and Larry sat in his favourite chair watching the young couple before him. He was happy when he saw Peyton in Lucas' arms, she was so peaceful. Her hazel eyes didn't show angst and the fear for it anymore. It was for the first time in years he had seen her so relaxed and blissful. Probably the first time since his wife died.

When Peyton looked at her dad, she saw a strange look in his eyes. He seemed to be jealous that she lay in Lucas' arms instead of his, but he also seemed satisfied and happy for her at the same time.

Peacefully she fell asleep in his arms, Lucas carried her upstairs and kissed her goodnight and left her, he needed to go to his own home again. After saying goodbye to Larry he began to his walk home. While walking home he wondered about what the new week would bring them.


	23. It's Harder To Breathe

It's Harder To Breathe When You're Standing On The Edge

**It's Harder To Breathe When You're Standing On The Edge**

It was Saturday afternoon and Tric seemed to be turned upside down. Peyton was running around with her cell phone in her hand. Everywhere was chaos. Tonight Nathan and Haley would give a party in Tric to announce they were getting married again. Peyton wanted everything to be perfect, more than perfect, but they were running out of time faster than she had hoped. Lucas tried to soothe her by telling her they would make it in time and that she didn't have to worry, but Peyton just couldn't believe him, there were so many things they still needed to do and so little time left.

Nervous Peyton kept running around, telling everybody what to do and how to do things. Karen was happy that Peyton was so focused on Tric, but she saw that her son's girlfriend was on the edge of breaking down.

"Luke." Karen stopped Lucas from walking around. He was moving the heavy things. "Please go talk to Peyton and make sure she okay." Lucas sighed.

"She won't listen, mom, I tried already to calm her down, but she won't let me." He said while he looked worried at his girlfriend.

"Go and try again in that case." Karen said resolute, she found it his job to look after Peyton now, so Lucas walked over to Peyton, she seemed on the edge of a break down or on the edge of outrage. Lucas didn't want to take the risk of making her even more nervous or angrier, but he knew he had to do something.

Peyton hadn't seen it coming and was checking the stage when Lucas spun her around and pressed his lips forcefully on hers. He moved her back until she sat on the stage and than she began to punch him on his chest.

"Lucas, stop it! We don't have time for it!" She snapped furious. When she saw the expression on Lucas' face she didn't know how to feel, she felt herself weird and tired, and now also guilty for yelling at Lucas without a descent reason. Not any of this was his fault. "Sorry, sorry. I shouldn't work it out on you. But I …" Lucas broke her off.

"It's okay." He said softly and gently massaged her shoulders. In the short time they were together, Lucas already learned that Peyton totally relaxed under his touch, it was a sort of magic and Lucas felt himself great when he could help the girl he loved. Tenderly he kept massaging her shoulder and neck.

"Maybe I should call the boys, they could help." Peyton threw her head back.

"No." She moaned. "We promised we wouldn't tell anyone about their plans for tonight." Lucas sighed and stopped and turned Peyton around.

"Come on Peyton. They won't tell it further and they would really help us out." Peyton considered it. "Besides, than we'll have a little free time." He whispered in her ear, the tone of his voice made shivers ran over her back.

"Let's call them." She said, the idea of a kiss-session with Lucas entertained Peyton. He quickly called Mouth, Junk, Fergie and Skills. Everything went a lot faster and a few hours passed by. Peyton was afraid that they wouldn't make it in time, but they actually did make it, they even had an hour to do what they wanted. Peyton was so happy and began to hug Luke's Rivercourt friends. "Thank you so much guys, I really wouldn't have made it without you." The guys smiled.

After a half minute of silence in the club Peyton shouted: "You all get a beer from me!" The guys began to laugh and shouted. Normally there wasn't alcohol in Tric, but now it was party with only the friends from Nathan and Haley Karen had decided that a little alcohol wouldn't hurt anyone.

It was twenty minutes before the party officially would begin and Peyton and Lucas needed to change clothing. Quickly they made their way to one of the dressing rooms where actually the bands needed to get ready.

Peyton quickly took her old jeans and her Tric-shirt off, and Lucas on the other hand hadn't got further than taking his T-shirt off.

"Come on Lucas. Change your clothes we haven't so much time left over." But he kept staring at her, and his eyes hungrily ran over her half naked body. "Luke?" She asked and began to wave to him. His eyes glided from her beautiful face to her, to her breasts, to her belly. She had put on some weight, Lucas thought she was a lot sexier now, she wasn't all skin and bones anymore. Then his blue eyes rested her stunning legs, Peyton always thought the scar would ruin everything, but Lucas didn't care about it, it was a reminding of a new start for him. His breath was a lot heavier now and the look in his eyes made Peyton feel warm inside.

"Come on Luke. Hurry." She said and covered her body with her dress, knowing she was about to rip the cloths off his body. The look in his magic blue eyes drove her wild. Fast but carefully she putted on her dress.

It was a gorgeous dress, it was black and white. The top part was white and strapless, the 'skirt' was black. The dress was covered with little glitters, not over the whole dress, but just over some parts. The skirt of the dress stopped just on her knees. Lucas was wearing a dark pair of jeans and a red shirt. He looked handsome. Peyton walked over to him and began to button his shirt. She loved doing that, just doing little things for him, like buying his favourite candy or a magazine he loved to read. Or just letting him watch his TV programme or listing to him when he talked about basketball or authors or books. Just those little things, it made her happy, knowing she could be there for him, could make him happy, as happy as he made her.

Lucas gave Peyton a long kiss on the mouth just before they needed to leave the room. Tonight they couldn't show the love they had, there were too much people, so they needed to hide it. So no mouth-kissing or kissing on another part than the cheek and even that couldn't last long and couldn't be repeated more than two times, no close hugging, no close dancing, no holding hands. Nothing at all, it would be hard, but it's how they had chosen it.

As soon as the doors opened, the people kept coming, after a half hour everyone who was invited was there. Peyton, who was a little nervous got on the stage to speak to the all the ones there.

"Hi everyone!" She spoke through the microphone. "I am Peyton Sawyer, as you probably all know. And I welcome you to Tric tonight, and so does Karen Roe!" A spot glided to the bar where Karen was standing, she waved gently and than the spot was back on the stage. "You're here because you're invited by Nathan and Haley. And I know why they did it, but you don't, but you'll know it very soon. Please, applause for Nathan Scott and Haley James … Scott!" Peyton yelled and than handed to microphone to Nathan and vanished in a dark counter of the stage.

"Hi everyone!" Nathan and Haley yelled in the microphone together. And from there Nathan took the lead over the words.

"Thanks everyone for coming to Tric tonight, thank you to Peyton Sawyer and Karen Roe for letting us in to have a party tonight." The crowd yelled. "Thanks to the lovely girl besides me, Haley James." And he pressed a loving kiss to her cheek and than handed her the microphone.

"Hi everyone." She said shy. "I actually had a whole speech prepared for this, but I am so nervous I can't remember any of it." She looked a little embarrassed. "Yeah, rock star Haley gets a little nervous from time to time. But I remember one thing." She swallowed and looked at Nathan. "While I was writing my speech, the song 'Hotel Roosevelt' from Augustana played in the background. The song somehow reminds me on my relationship with Nathan. How it has been, and there is a line in that song that really gets us." She looked up and Nathan. "All the wars we won, but we're still walking home." She lightly said on a singing tone. "Nathan and me have gone through so much already, all those wars we already won, but we knew there are still other difficulties on our way, and those we have to face and beat, and at the end will be home." Peyton could see that Nathans was stroking Haley's back, she thought it was sweet, she kept wondering what Haley had done to change him from the badass she was with to this sweet guy he was now.

"But now to the point again." She said quickly. "A while ago, Nathan asked me something … again." She said and handed Nathan the microphone back again. "I asked her, if she would marry me again in front of our family and all our friends, and she said: …" Even the answer was so predictable the crowd was holding his breath.

"I said: yes!" She yelled and the crowd became almost insane, they were screaming Nathan and Haley's name. Nathan smiled and pulled Haley in for a kiss that went from pretty chaste to not so chaste. Peyton walked to the centre of the stage again and tapped on Nathan's shoulder.

"You're not alone." She whispered and pointed to the crowd who looked a little bored. Haley began to blush and Nathan looked to the crowd again.

"And you're all invited!"

After everyone had congratulated Nathan and Haley, time went by on a good tempo, skipping boring or annoying moments, or that was until Peyton needed to use the bathroom and she almost bumped into a fighting Brooke and Haley.

"You said I would do the speech!" Brooke yelled.

"Brooke, come on, don't do this now. Not here." Haley asked with a pleading face.

"You said I was the one to do it, I'm perfect for things like that!" She screamed again.

"Keep your voice down Brooke." Haley said embarrassed when she found some people staring at them. "You are already the maid of honour and you're making my wedding dress, please Brooke, don't make a big deal out of it." Brooke pouted.

"Who does the speech?" She asked curious.

"A couple, but it has to be a surprise." Peyton felt the heat under her feet getting warmer and dropped off to the bathroom.

When she was back on the dance floor again, she tried to avoid Lucas' staring eyes, but it was difficult when a boy is practically stripping you with his piercing eyes. Lucas was hypnotised by her dance moves, her grace, and her beauty. He couldn't take it anymore and walked over to her on the dance floor and began to dance close to her.

Peyton tried not to touch him while she was dancing but it was difficult when you're like two magnets that are drawn to the other. As she kept moving away, he kept coming closer again. After a while they had reached the corner from the dance floor. When no-one was paying attention to them, Lucas pressed a kiss on Peyton lips. Happy and satisfied with his stolen kiss, Lucas walked over to the bar to have a drink. Peyton still felt the warmth of his lips on her, she began to dance again closer to the other people.

It had been a half hour since Lucas had stolen a kiss from Peyton, but with the liquid in his body and in hers. Peyton's moves became sexier and she totally gave herself over to the music. He couldn't take it anymore. She was killing him from there. She was so turning him on, God, it was like something he had never felt before. When she made this brutal eye contact with him, the word 'control' was vanished out of his dictionary, or at least for a while.

He made his way over to her and leaned in so he could say something in her ear.

"I've got to say something." He almost screamed in her ear, but the music was so loud, she wouldn't understand him if he said it on a lower tone. He took her by the arm and leaded her away from the crowd and into a backroom.

Once they got into the room, Lucas forced his full lips to hers. Full of passion and impatient to taste her, Lucas kissed her. His tongue met hers and the kiss got more intense. While their tongues battled, his hands found their place on her butt.

Lucas was playing a dangerous game with Peyton, and she was aware of it. He started that game when her dad came home again. There were more kisses and touches, and every opportunity was used by Lucas to touch Peyton. And the bedtimes were nothing more than just lips, tongues and hands. He was driving Peyton to edge of her self-control, and he kept balancing with her on the edge between staying by their agreement or breaking it.

"You have no idea what you're doing to me right now." He gasped, but she certainly had a thought when she felt the bump through his trousers. She tried to smile, but she knew Lucas was about to lose his own self-control. And she definitely knew it when his hands disappeared under the skirt of her dress. Lucas forced Peyton against the wall, he was getting more demanding. Peyton figured out that was the reason why he didn't drink alcohol. It took away his sense of when to stop in situations like this, and probably in any situation where sexuality, violence or verbal fighting was involved. She knew that many other drunk people couldn't either, but for someone like Lucas, with so much conscious of what he had to do and so many people to protect that couldn't get hurt again, it was terrible for someone like him to lose control.

But his hands were definitely purposeful as they went straight to her briefs. Peyton began to shift, causing Lucas to let go of her.

"Luke, and what about what we agreed?" She asked out of breath.

"Screw that damn agreement! I want you here, and I want you now." He husked in her ear. She bit on her lower lip, knowing this wouldn't be easy to turn around.

"Luke, we said we would wait until I was sure." She said softly. "Come on Peyton." He moaned. "You're sure or otherwise we wouldn't be together anymore. Or aren't you?" He asked when she bit on her lower lip.

"I am sure Luke, but just be patient, I don't feel like this is more special than in my bedroom." She softly said and brushed her hands through his soft hair.

He moaned but chose to ignore her and his hands began to tug on her panties. Also Peyton wanted it as much as he did, maybe even more but it still wasn't how they agreed it. And the idea of doing it here with a drunk Lucas made her feel uneasy, she knew she would regret it later and so would he. But now that they were here, a little fun wouldn't be that bad and it would satisfy Lucas for a while.

With one swift motion, Peyton escaped from his hold and pressed him against the hard wall. Her lips tracing a track of red lipstick from his temple to his neck. On purpose skipping his chest, only letting her fingertips sliding over the smooth material before reaching his belt. Lucas let out some satisfied moans.

"That's my girl." He groaned while his fingers ran through her curly hair. She smiled at him as she unbuttoned the three lowest buttons of his shirt, making space for her mouth to ran along the exposed skin.

The noise from the music drowned the little moans of Lucas' pleasure. Peyton couldn't stop smiling when she got rid of Lucas jeans, letting it rest on his ankles. After that she began to tug on his black boxers.

"Come on Peyton, you're evil you know, playing with me like this." Lucas moaned. She was about to take them off when she was soon interrupted.

"Okay … gross!" Both blondes turned their heads do the door to find Nathan standing in the doorway. "I've seen you both naked, but this is gross." Peyton buried her head in her hands, more than just embarrassed by her ex. Lucas quickly made his way into his jeans. It seemed like he had turned sober in just a few seconds.

"Close the door man." He said and so did Nathan. "Okay, I mean this is really … gross, my ex-girlfriend who also is my best friend was about to give my big brother a …" Nathan stopped himself when he saw the stern look on his older brother's face.

Lucas helped Peyton to stand up again and softly embraced her. His fingers caressed her bare shoulders, trying to soothe her. "Haley and I are going to take off. I just wanted to say that." Nathan saw the upcoming tears in Peyton's eyes. "Sorry Peyton." He gently said and walked over to her. "You don't have to cry. I am not going to tell anyone, if that is what you worry about." Hugging her tightly after releasing her out Lucas' arms.

"I know, but it just was a long and dragging day and I'm so tired and I don't like to get caught." He smiled, she wasn't the girl he used the date, she was so much better now.

"How late is it Nate?" Lucas asked.

"Around 01:00 AM." He replied, showing his watch.

When Lucas and Peyton were back on the bar, most people left already. While Karen and Lucas cleaned up the place, Peyton fell asleep with her head on the counter. She was so tired, and she woke up by Lucas' tender touch and his sweet words. When she opened her eyes, she found herself on Lucas' bed.

"Luke, what am I doing here?" She asked confused.

"I brought us home from Tric, you're spending the night with us, it's okay with your dad, we already called him." Lucas threw a T-shirt to her. "Put it on, than we can go to sleep." He already had switched. Peyton did extremely long over taking her dress off, and she was fighting against the sleep. Gently Lucas helped her taking of her dress, then his lips began to caress her tummy.

"Luke, come on, are you serious?" She muttered. "No." He said smiling and helped her putting on one of his own T-shirts. After that they made their selves comfortable to fall asleep after a long day.

It was exactly one week before Nathan and Haley's wedding, and there was still so much to do, so little time. So many things to do together, so many things to do alone. So many things that could change their lives, and so many things that couldn't affect anything at all.

Time was running them by, and it was time to make habits or to break habits. Or … to do both.


	24. When Hell Ends Up In Heaven

When Hell Ends Up In Heaven, Then Let Your Love Be Strong

**When Hell Ends Up In Heaven, Tha****n Let Your Love Be Strong**

"Come on Luke, help me a little." She begged him while he was feverish writing in his notebook, while the page before her still was untouched. "Lucas?" She patted on his shoulder to draw is attention. He sighed.

"Peyton, you have to do it on your own, I am sure it's going to be good, just trust yourself." He said but didn't look up.

"Lucas." Lost anger ran through her veils. "You read and you write, it's your second nature, it's what you breathe. Come on help me, I am not used to do stuff like this." Lucas turned around and took her on his lap.

"Come on Peyton, you need to believe you can do it, otherwise you fail." He pressed a kiss to her cheek and pulled her closer to him.

"I feel so bad about this." She said softly, on a guilty tone after a several minutes.

"About what?" He asked and tried to catch the message in her eyes.

"You. You're always supporting me, and I feel bad about that. That you always need to build me up again, and you seem so strong, even you lost Keith not so long ago. Why are you so strong, and why am I so weak?" Lucas laid his arms around her waist.

"You're not weak Peyton, don't say that ever again. You're one of the strongest women I know. You've gone through so much and you're still here, you don't let it get you. And I am not so strong as I look Peyton. I also break down sometimes, but that's when I am alone. I am not invincible Peyton, don't ever believe that." Peyton bit on her lower lip while she felt tears coming up.

"But I need you to show me that you're not."

"I will." He said and let her head rest on his chest.

He let her rest long enough, until she was ready to go on again. It was strange how emotional she had become since they were together. Just after the shooting she was all 'Get-Lost' and since they were together she had those moments that she was so drowned under in her endless sadness. Lucas had found her a few times while she was crying when she was drawing or just listening to music. But when she was listening to Led Zeppelin he knew she thought about Ellie.

He had talked about it with Larry. But the older man had reassured him that everything was fine with Peyton.

"Lucas, you've just broken off her walls. It's normal for her, and the last months weren't easy. With her walls, Peyton seems like a normal girl to the world, just one who doesn't want spies in her soul and mind. And only we know why she uses them. But without her walls, she is vulnerable. It's all going to be fine. She repressed everything for years and years, now it's finally coming out, she just needs time to heal those inner wounds. She's building on her new personality. Just wait and it will be worth it." Yeah Lucas knew that it defiantly would be worth it.

After a few more hours, Peyton finally finished writing her speech, it had been difficult but she was happy with her result. Then Peyton and Lucas decided to relax a bit, just lying on his bed.

Lucas had become less demanding after 'getting caught' by Nathan last week. He didn't insist anymore because he knew Peyton was pretty close by giving him everything, he also didn't want to rush her. Peyton was more than sure she wanted Lucas next to her in her future, she was just waiting for a perfect moment to tell him. And the moment was approaching, just a little, little more waiting needed to be done.

Peyton rested with her head on his chest, wanting this to never end. When Lucas realised that they had to go their separate ways and to meet each other again tomorrow morning, Peyton tried to put a stop to the things that were happening. She made her way on top of him and began to kiss him with all she had. Lucas knew what she was doing, delaying the inevitable, he decided to at least return to kiss properly. Her fingers found their way under his T-shirt and softly sucked on his lower lip.

"Peyton." He gently took a hold of her upper arms

. "Luke." She responded on a complaining tone.

"We talked about it Peyton, it's just one night. Then you'll never have to sleep with Brooke in one room again. Tomorrow morning we're together again." Peyton looked away, this strange sort of guilt kept hanging around her.

"Come, let's pack your things." He kindly said and looked into her eyes, those blue eyes stared into her green eyes, kept telling her that everything would be alright.

Lucas drove Peyton back to her house and helped her making her bag. Not like it was necessary to help her, she just needed her pyjama, her toothbrush, make-up and stuff.

While packing he automatically stayed around her, just making body contact by just doing regular things. Kissed her when she passed him by, just touched her hand or arm by passing something to her, giving her intense eye-contact, pulling her close when he saw her hesitating or becoming sad. Lucas knew how her body reacted under his touch, if he just lay his hands on her shoulders, she could relax in that moment, he had this sort of healing her, and she knew that he was the only one who could 'heal' her, nobody else could what he could and nobody else would ever be possible to do what Lucas did, 'heal' her inner wounds.

The time on the clock forced them to leave the house. Peyton and Lucas walked hand in hand out of her room. When she passed Larry's almost empty room, Peyton stopped walking. Lucas saw how his girlfriend's face twisted in a very, very sad and hurt expression. Larry left yesterday evening, it was heartbreaking to see him and his daughter say their goodbyes.

Somehow it still hurts Peyton, she still thinks somehow he does it not only because he loves his job so much, but also because he rather wanted to be away from her. But that wasn't true, Larry would rather stay here and live with his daughter. But the thought he could leave his little girl by someone she loved and someone who loved her, was enough soothe him.

But it didn't soothe Peyton that much, after Larry's promise to be home when she graduated and after their goodbyes, Peyton had cried the whole night against Lucas' chest, and it was difficult for Lucas to comfort Peyton. This distressing wound that never got the time the heal enough before it gets aggravate again, how could he ever heal that?

"Come here." He whispered and pulled her in his arms. Tenderly caressing her blond hair with his lips. Making an end on her facing that nearly empty bedroom. Peyton would stay by Lucas the next week, she wasn't ready to face that empty home again and Lucas wouldn't let her alone when she was like this.

Five minutes before Peyton was expected by Haley, Lucas and Peyton stood on the parking of the apartment.

"Promise me you won't fight with Brooke, okay?" She nodded and pressed a kiss on his soft lips.

"I promise." Also she knew that she couldn't promise that, she had this bad presentiment about this evening.

Lucas and Peyton went their separate ways, Lucas would spent some time with Nathan and Peyton with Haley and Brooke. Preparing everything for the wedding tomorrow.

Lucas and Nathan picked up their suits by the store and then headed to the Rivercourt for a little basketball and after that they went to Lucas' home. By Haley, Brooke and Peyton the mood was tense and Peyton tried her best to not get involved in a fight with Brooke, and she did that for Haley. Haley talked most of the time about how she had planned the wedding but didn't slip a word about Lucas and Peyton that would do the speech. Also trying on the dresses for the bridesmaids and for the bride itself stood on their list.

A few hours later Haley was in the bathroom making herself ready to go to bed, and there wasn't much to do for Peyton, talking to Brooke wasn't an option. She was glad she had her sketchbook by her side and stared at a blank page. Slowly she let pencil touch the piece of paper.

T

Th

Thi

This

This S

This Su

This Suc

This Suck

This Sucks

Just after she ended writing the last character, Brooke's voice floated in her ear.

"Do you think this sucks for you? Well, it sucks more for me!" She screamed. Peyton sighed and tried not to give Brooke any attention. Brooke was about to explode when Peyton kept ignoring her.

"Hey slut, I am talking to you. Don't think you're way too good to answer me!" Peyton tried to speak calm and managed to keep her voice down.

"Brooke, this is not the time and the place for stuff like this. Think about Haley." Brookes head had become red of her rage.

"You are a selfish whore and you know it. Nobody wants to be with you, you'll never found somebody, expect … drugs. I bet you'll die in your early forties with breast cancer and a given away child and you'll regret that you never had to know him or her. You'll be the perfect copy of your dear mommy Ellie!"

"Brooke!" Haley screamed.

"It's time that someone tells the truth around here Haley. Lucas didn't want her, he only needed sex and some thrill. She wasn't more than a booty-call for him, and tomorrow Lucas will be mine again." Brooke looked like a devil in her red baby doll. Peyton turned around and ran out the door, not giving Brooke a chance to see her tears.

In her black Emily The Strange T-shirt and a pair of grey shorts she ran into the cold night. Haley found Peyton on the stairs before the apartments listening to her music. Quietly singing Saliva's 'Always'.

"Peyton." She touched her shoulder, Peyton looked up to the girl next to her.

"You're going to be sick Peyton, come inside again." But she shook her head.

"I am not going inside anymore, I hate Brooke. What if she gets Lucas back, than my world is gone." She began to sob. Haley sat down next to her and pulled her in a hug.

"She's not going to get him back, Peyton, as long as you fight for him. Now you finally have him, you can better hold him close. And I know Lucas, this time he isn't going to mess it up. He'll let nobody in between the two of you. He has made that pretty clear to me." Peyton smiled thankful to Haley. This was the first time in a quiet long time that they had a piece of their friendship back.

"At least take this." Haley handed Peyton the sweater she had been wearing, it was one of Nathan's.

"Just come sleep with us when you're ready." Peyton nodded and putted on the sweater.

"Thank you Haley." She whispered and than Haley let Peyton alone with her music in the night before her wedding.

With her legs close to her chest, Peyton putted her legs into the sweater, it was big enough. The jumper smelled just like Nathan, it calmed Peyton, somehow feeling her best friend was so close to her.

After sitting outside for another half hour, she went back inside, all the lights were turned off and everything was cleaned up. Brooke and Haley were already asleep. Peyton quickly went to the bathroom to brush her teeth and than also went to sleep, trying not to make any noise that could wake up the other two girls.

In the meantime Lucas and Nathan were talking in Lucas' bedroom. Both boys enjoyed the time they had together, Nathan and Lucas couldn't imagine a life without each other anymore, it was so strange to think about the years they hadn't spoken a word, that it all was about hating each other.

"I am glad you're here Nathan." Lucas sat on his bed and Nathan on the mattress on the floor.

"Thank you for having me here Lucas. And thank you for being my best man tomorrow." Lucas smiled.

"I am glad you asked me too." After talking about basketball for another hour, they both went to sleep. After a while Nathan began to talk again.

"I can't believe I am getting married tomorrow." Lucas turned on his side.

"I think it's too late to change your mind, Nate." Lucas said.

"I don't mean that Luke. I mean, I was thinking about our first game on the Rivercourt. I never thought that things would turn out this way. We as brothers, me and Haley, you and Peyton. I am just so sorry about everything." Lucas turned the light on again.

"Sorry about what?" "You and Peyton." He repeated. "The misery I caused you both. If I hadn't been so selfish back then, you two would have been together from the beginning, than Brooke would have found someone else, and their friendship wouldn't be destroyed." Lucas stood up from his bed and sat down next to Nathan.

"It's okay Nathan. Don't you worry about it, tomorrow is your big day. Don't stay up all night thinking about stuff that you can't change anymore. Me and Peyton, we're good now, and you helped her Nathan. If you didn't persuade her to tell her about her feelings for me, if you didn't push her into it, she probably wasn't my girlfriend now. I own you the world."

Lucas hugged his brother and than went lying in his own bed again.

"Let's go to sleep Nathan. Tomorrow is your big day, you and Haley finally have to chance to convince the world that you two are meant to be. The beginning of a great life is for you, little brother." Nathan smiled.

"For you too, big brother." Lucas smiled bright and than went to sleep again.

In Haley's apartment Peyton kept turning around on her mattress on the floor, she couldn't sleep, she missed Lucas, the warmth of his body. When she looked up she saw Brooke and Haley fast asleep in the double bed. She hated that she had to be here, the only reason she was here, was for Haley.

Twenty minutes later she still was awake and it seemed that the hands of the clock went backwards instead of forwards.

As quiet as possible she stood up and dressed herself again in the bathroom. First she putted on jeans, than her green T-shirt with an imagine of a big white fingerprint in the middle of it, than she putted on her socks and her All Stars. After she combed her hair and brushed her teeth again, she made her way out of the apartment, she was glad that she had her brown sweater by her, because the air was colder than she had thought first.

She started walking and was happy when she arrived at Lucas' house after a while. Lucas' bedroom door wasn't locked, that surprised Peyton, but it was much easier for her. She made her way into the dark room, trying not the fall over the sleeping Nathan on the floor. Finally she reached her target, Lucas' bed. She let herself sink into his soft mattress and immediately, in reflex, snuggled up against his body. Lucas opened his eyes by this sudden change in his near atmosphere. He was surprised when he found the slumbering Peyton beside him.

"Peyton?" He softly asked, she opened her eyes again and smiled. "What are you doing here, is there something wrong?" Lucas asked while making a little more room for her in the bed. Her smile faded away.

"I missed you too much, that mattress was so cold and I felt lonely." She said and laid her head on his pillow.

"And?" He asked, knowing she was holding things back.

"I had a fight with Brooke this evening." Lucas looked away and than back, she could tell he was extremely disappointed.

"Come on, you promised you wouldn't." Peyton looked guilty.

"But she was really mean to me Luke, she said I was whore and that I was selfish and that I would never found someone who wanted to be with me, expect drugs and that I would die as woman in her forties with breast cancer and would have given away my own child. She said that I am the perfect copy of Ellie." A single tear escaped her left eye. She didn't let a word about Brookes plans for tomorrow escape her mouth.

"Oh." Was the only reaction he had. "Oh Peyton." He said when she softly sobbed. Carefully he took her in his arms and rubbed her back. "

It's not going to be that way Peyton, do you hear me, and you're different." He whispered resolute in her ear. "We're different."

They both stayed quiet for a while, after a few minutes Peyton stopped crying, she wouldn't let Brooke break her. Not again.

"Read for me." She suddenly said. Lucas looked down at the blond girl besides him and smiled. He reached next to him, turned on the light on his nightstand and took a book from the little cupboard. Shakespeare's Romeo&Juliet. He softly began to read for her, letting the words wave a magical web around them, the only thing that could be heard was the soft noise of their breathing and the perfect tone of his boyish voice.

That was what he had done the last few weeks, reading for her when she couldn't sleep, or nightmares had woken her up.

Lucas noticed that Peyton often had nightmares, always about the past or the people she loved the most. It was an evil trick from her mind to keep teasing her with her sad life. Mostly the terrifying dreams had returning subjects. She had nightmares about the shooting, about losing her dad, about the accident from her mom, about Ellie's cancer, about losing Lucas or a friend of hers, about Brooke and her revenge, or about Nikki taking away Jenny from Jake.

But the reading, it started a few weeks ago when Lucas woke up and found Peyton whimpering against his chest, she was lost in a mental position somewhere between having a nightmare but somehow being conscious of the world in her near immediacy.

"Don't leave me mommy. Don't, don't leave me." Tears had been wetting his bare chest. "I miss you so much, mommy. Mommy? Where are you? I can't see you, don't leave me, I am so scared mommy, it's so dark, why are you bleeding? Mommy?" She whispered in an anxious and childish voice, her fingers scratching against his chest. Gently he had woken her up, he still couldn't forgot the anxious and bewildered look in her green eyes.

"Luke?" She had whispered, not knowing what happened. Lucas had gently told her that she had a nightmare and Peyton had told her nightmare, that she was a child again, and that she was in the car from her mother at the moment she had been hit by the other car.

The silence between them had been long, until she broke it with the words. "Read for me." Lucas had been surprised but when she told him her story why she wanted it, needed it, he couldn't do anything else than read for her.

"My mom always read for me when I was little, it was our evening ritual, until the day she died. And than my dad began to read for me when I missed my mom, he has read every single fairytale for me and some other books. He has done that for a really long time, until I went to high school. Actually he didn't read that much for me, because he was more away than at home. But he did it every single night when he was at home. But when he stopped I kind of lost my interest for reading."

Now Lucas was reading for Peyton, after a while her eyes closed but opened again after a few seconds. She was falling asleep but wanted to stay awake just to hear Lucas' voice, the comforting tone of it. Lucas saw her struggling and began to read on a much softer tone, it was barely whispering. After five minutes more, she had fallen asleep and satisfied Lucas looked at the girl next to him, than looked at his younger brother who still was asleep and hadn't a clue from Peyton's attendance. He closed the book and putted it on his nightstand again and than turned out the light.

He fell asleep to dream of something new that was waiting for him. This day would be a big day for him and Peyton. He knew it, when he looked a last time to her beautiful face that was framed with her blond curls before falling asleep, he saw it on her face.

…

This would be the first real day of their future.


	25. Not a Chapter but an IMPORTANT AN

Hi people,

Hi people,

Most of you probably wonder what I was babbling about 'an explanation' in the responses to you. (I have written by the most who reviewed, only not the last ones I opened)

I am kind of wrong, actually I should have mentioned the 'explanation' thing on Monday. But it's freaking warm here, I am still somewhat sleepy and my brain is melting (today would be the hottest one of the year in Belgium)

Okay, I should not put it on the weather. I am just clumsy and absentminded and I forgot it is Thursday and not Monday. (How bad am I?)

So what's the deal?

All the chapters I have been updating since I came here were already written over the past year and all were on Leytonfic. (There are still three Leytonfic chapters for Heartbeats and one for CISTYA)

What's happening now?

I am running out of chapters and I don't want to go from updating twice a week to not updating anymore so I still have some chapters written.

So I decided I only go updating on Sunday beginning next week. (Please don't hate me)

As I mentioned earlier, otherwise I'll end up with nothing anymore and I am not a quick writer. Writing a regular update for 1 story takes from 1 to 3 weeks, mostly 2 or 3 weeks during the school year. So once I run out of chapters, I might take a some time before I get anything ready.

So 'Heartbeats' and 'Chicago Is So Two Years Ago' will only be updated on Sunday's from now on. This was the last Wednesday update. Once I really run out of chapters Heartbeats and CISTYA will not be updated together anymore. One time I'll update Heartbeats when I have a chapter ready, then I work on another chapter for CISTYA.

I hope you'll understand. (And I don't make a mess of this)

By the way: THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS, I mean, both my stories have already more than 100 reviews … it's like a dream coming true.

Thanks for all the amazing support already, I love each one of you. You all make my world a better place. (See, my brain is melting, I start going crazy) No no, I mean it. I love you all for being so supportive about this, it means the world to me.

Much love…

Veronique

(P.S.: I mentioned it a few times already. I originally worked only on Leytonfic and the site disappeared for no reason and so did the official L&P site. It doesn't look like they are coming back. So I know some authors, members and people who visited the site regularly are also here.

I am working on a C2 called 'the Leytonfic Generation' and I am in search for stories which were on Leytonfic, I found some stories already but I am sure there are a lot more so if anyone finds a story and is sure it was also in Leytonfic, PM me and I'll add it to my C2.

If you know authors for Leytonfic, encourage them to give FanFiction a try. It's sad that so many great authors and so many great stories got lost. It's unfair. So I hope you all try to help me to get an amazing piece of Lucas&Peyton fiction back. Thanks already!)


	26. We've Waited For So Long

A/N: There is kind of an M-rated situation in the chapter. Just to warn you. (Okay, might not be that 'thrilling' but I haven't changed much on the orginial version of it. But in a few chapters you'll get a whole M-rated chapter ... kind of want to see if I make progress between this chapter and that one ahead) Also I want to mention to read my A/N-chapter if you haven't ... just to make so things clear. Much love ...

**We've Waited For So Long**

"Wake up Peyton. Come on Blondie, wake up." Lucas softly shook Peyton awake. It was only just past five.

"What?" She mumbled complaining. She was barely awake, still drunk of her sweet dreams.

"Get up!" He insisted, way too harsh for so early in the day.

"Why?" Still not in a good behaviour 'cause Lucas had pulled her out of her dreamland. "I was just dreaming so fine about you. You looked so sexy only wearing your boxers." She made her way on top of Lucas and began to kiss him very slowly, trying to get lost in the lazy ecstasy. Soon he interrupted her and she followed his gaze to the mattress on the floor with the sleeping Nathan.

"Oh." She said and quickly stood up. She totally had forgotten what day it was.

"You need to get going, I guess you better be back by Haley and Brooke before they wake up."

Peyton began to dress up, she didn't mind to change her cloths in the same room were her boyfriend and her ex-boyfriend was. Nathan was asleep and Lucas was gentleman enough to look away if he needed to.

Peyton was back in time and time ran by fast, before they knew it, Lucas was by Haley to wish her luck before she got married again and Peyton was by Nathan to calm him and tell him that it was his big day and he didn't have to worry about that bad dream he had.

Lucas looked so handsome when he walked with Haley on his arm towards Nathan. Peyton got warm inside, knowing one day she would be giving away to marry Lucas. While the priest talked, Peyton stared intensely at Lucas. They threw flirting looks at each other. Lucas' blue eyes got that passionate look again, like he was undressing her with his eyes, Peyton smiled shy, blush on her cheeks. When she looked besides her she saw Brookes in full flirt mode, with her innocent eyes and her blood red lips. Lucas also noticed that Brooke was thinking he was flirting with her, only from that thought he could almost throw up. He and Brooke? Never again!

Lucas and Peyton both quitted their activities and Lucas listened to the vows his brother and sister-in-law told. Peyton gave her attention on the vows and also on Cooper who was smiling at her. She had met Cooper a couple of times before when she dated Nathan. His uncle Cooper was a handsome and fine man, always good company. Maybe a little too flirty sometimes, when Peyton still was with Nathan and Cooper was there, he always flirted with Peyton, and if Peyton had a rough day with Nathan, sometimes she flirted back, just to forget the frustration Nathan caused her. And it wasn't that bad for self-confidence when an older guy thought you were sexy.

"You may kiss the bride." Those were the words to let Peyton snap out of thinking mode. From then everything went very quick and before they knew it, they had to do their speeches.

The crowd was pretty restless but quiet enough, the faces of Nathan and Haley were full of bliss, they deserved to be this happy, their road had been long, bumpy, and they almost lost track of it. But they had earned every single moment of happiness they would receive now.

"Hello everyone, I'm Lucas Scott, I am the half brother of Nathan Scott and the best friend and brother-in-law from Haley James Scott. Nathan and I share the same father and Haley and I share a friendship that has stared years and years ago.

Today I'm going to give a speech for this fresh married couple, again. It's the second time I have to do it for them, but it's with all my pleasure. I would do it over and over again if they asked me to."

Lucas breathed the air that made them able to breathe, forced his heart to race a little less and than began to speak in front of all those people.

"Life is a gift from nature, the birth of the souls in one. A gift made by the absolute love between two people. Haley was the gift of the love between Jim and Lydia James. Jim and Lydia have an unconditional love for each other, they are the parents of several children and Haley is the youngest, and she's their baby girl: smart and talented musician.

Love is a privilege. You've got many kinds of love. Love between parents and children, love between brothers and sisters, love between other family members like the love between uncles and nephews, you've got love between friends, love between people who used to be in love, love between strangers.

Talented is everyone, but not everyone discovers it. But Haley did, even at a very young age, she always treasured her gift of singing and playing piano and guitar, she maybe didn't show the world for quiet a long time, but when you did it was big.

Like I said earlier, love is a privilege, and you somehow have to earn it. Haley didn't have a love life before she met Nathan. She wasn't the type of girl that fell in love with every boy she thought was cute. She was way too down to earth. Until the day she fell in love with Nathan. She became much happier, and she allowed herself to change.

The musician in Haley compares everything with a song, well after very long research, I found a song that for me at least, covers the difficult part of the relationship with Nathan. Let me quote you the chorus from the Dashboard Confessional song Vindicated:

_Vindicated_

_I am selfish_

_I am wrong_

_I am right_

_I swear I'm right_

_Swear I knew it all along_

_And I am flawed, but I am cleaning up so well_

_I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself_

Let me explain what I mean.

In our eyes, it was selfish from Haley to leave everything behind and go on tour with Chris. She was wrong to think her dream wasn't here but a place so far away from us, and that is was wrong that she thought her dream wasn't with Nathan but with a bunch of strangers. That she was so wrong to leave the road when it got bumpy. And deep in her heart, Haley knew she was selfish and wrong, but she also knew something else.

She was right on the other side. She had the right to go and chase after her dream, and to take this opportunity of a lifetime, and for one time in her life have the right to do something she self wanted. She took her fate in her own hands.

She swore she was right after she came back, satisfied she had the chance to breathe from a life other than the one she would return to, and to discover she wanted to return this place called home back in our Tree Hill by Nathan.

Haley has made mistakes and wrong choices, but the fact that today, she's here again to show everyone her unconditional love for Nathan, erases them in a sort of way. Let us forget what has happened, and it makes us look forwards instead backwards. Forces us to not look at the past behind us, and to forgive a maybe wrong choice, and forces us to look at the beautiful future that has to come.

And to end with the last line, now, after all, Haley sees what Nathans reflection in her is. This influence he had on her. The reflection of a talented person trapped in mistakes and wrong choices from the past, but being able to let it go, even they had to let each other go for a while first.

Proud of what they have reached even they had to deal with the sorrow and the anger and the fear first, and to replace it with the endless proud. And after all, Nathan and Haley are two talented individuals who see the reflection of themselves in the mirror of their love.

So treasure this day and give it a special in your heart, and every day after this. Remember today for it is, the beginning of always …"

Lucas held his breath to let him escape when he saw the happy faces of his best friend and his brother. Now it was Peyton's turn to speak in front of all those people, about how she saw Nathan and his life. She took a deep breath, and let go off nerves and began:

"Hi everybody, I'm Peyton Sawyer, how I'm related to Nathan and Haley? I'm one of Haley's friends and I'm the ex of Nathan Scott. Yes, the famous blond curly cheerleading one. They asked me to do this speech, and I said absolutely yes. I'm definitely not the best speaker but for them, I'll do my very best."

Peyton closed her eyes and inhaled the fresh air hoping she could do at least as well as Lucas and than began:

"Life is a dark path, if you need to walk alone. So many things happen, some for the worse and some for the better. Nathan's path doesn't looks that dark if you're standing on a sideway. He's the popular jock who can have every girl, is good at basket, and has many 'friends'.

If you look at his path from sideways, those non important things are the lights to guide him. You can compare his path with the hallway between the changing rooms and the court of The Ravens.

It's a small hallway with many spots to light it up. But every spot in Nathan's hallway of life is dimmed by the dark things of his life.

Pressure, poof, one light is out. Bad grades, poof, second light is out. Crappy home situation, poof, third light down. Those three things caused him a bad behaviour which caused him even more trouble, poof, that dims every other light in the hallway.

His path turned darker, colder, and scarier. The bad always overshadows the good. Until Haley James came along, their love story is famous.

Love is a guiding light, this flame that warms you, that light that gives you the ability to see. That heart shaped light which leads you to the centre of the court were on each side are basketball rings which symbolise the hearts in the game of love.

A game, intense, steals breaths, causes you to sweat, demands full attention. A game based on bounding and teamwork, for defence and attack. A game with the aim to score in the hearts of it. To make points as promises to never let go. Basket is a game of love.

But to come back by the relationship of Nathan Scott with Haley James, it wasn't all rainbows and sunshine. From not feeling good enough to hesitation about live changing decisions to be left alone when the road got bumpy to be then, reunited again with the love of your life after all the sadness and guilt. To forgive, but not forget.

To start over again, today."

Peyton finished her last sentence, and she held her breath wishing it was good enough to satisfy the people, and wishing even more that it was at least what Nathan and Haley had expected from her.

The applause that followed after a few seconds of silence was overwhelming, a few people where screaming her name. The biggest noise came from Cooper, Peyton could feel herself blush and than looked Lucas' face, the proud on his face was enough to make Peyton's eyes start to water. He winked boyish.

Their part together still had to come.

Lucas walked over to his microphone again and looked Peyton in the eye. She took a deep breath and signed Lucas he could begin. The warmth in his blue eyes encouraged her to be not afraid of what was going to come.

Lucas began:

"Today we're all here."

"For Nathan Scott and Haley James Scott." Peyton continued. They would both say a sentence and than the other would continue, it's how they had made the rest of the speech.

"Today we're here to celebrate their love."

"Today we're here to see them promise their love for each other again."

"Love is."

"Being in love, being there no matter what, being the comfort when the other cries. Love is."

"Helping the other stand up again after he or she falls, being their guardian angel, being a dream coming true. Love is."

"The possibility to stop running, the chance to change, a promise to never let go of each other again. Love is."

Lucas and Peyton started to walk towards to each other, until they were standing next to the other.

"Being the reason to live, being the reason to care, being the reason to stay, being the reason to breathe, being the reason to give, …, being everything. Love is."

"Being true love, being Nathan and Haley, … being us." Peyton finished and looked Lucas in the eye. You could hear the room holding his breath and that made Lucas smile.

"It's true what the girl besides me says: "Love is being us". Peyton and I are together." Lucas said and Peyton was holding her breath. And than the crowd started to clap their hands. All the faces glowed out this warmth for them, but Brooke didn't, with open mound and big teary eyes she accidentally dropped her glass. Everyone looked to her but after a few seconds the attention was back to the blond couple.

"A toast on Nathan Scott and Haley James Scott!" Lucas and Peyton screamed into the microphone and the crowd shouted the name of the newlyweds. After the toast Peyton and Lucas went back to their table and many people wished them luck with each other. Bevin, Whitey, Uncle Cooper, Kenzie but she already knew, a few other girls from the squad and the boys from the basketball team, even Rachel, Deb congratulated them and wished them much good luck, Dan stayed away and Lucas was very happy for that.

Than it was time to dance, after Nathan and Haley first dance, Lucas asked Peyton to dance with him. Peyton laid her head against his shoulder and Lucas hold her close to her while they danced on the beautiful song 'Boston' from Augustana. From time to time they broke their embrace to kiss. They both didn't want to let go of this safe and blissful feeling, but every song ends so this one too.

After Lucas, Peyton danced with Nathan, with Skills, even with Whitey, she really had a special bound with him. Lucas danced with Haley, with Bevin and with Deb. Peyton decided to sit down, not wanting to force her leg, it was fun to see Lucas dance with Kenzie. He and Kenzie also began to build on a little friendship. Lucas' motto was my girl's friends are my friends. A new song began and Lucas went looking for another partner to dance with.

"Can I have this dance?" She looked up and met the eyes of Nathan's uncle Cooper.

"Yeah." Peyton answered and laid her hand in Coopers inviting one. As a true gentleman he leaded her to the dance floor. Peyton was amazed by how good Cooper could dance, easy taking the lead, letting them sway over the floor.

"So, you're Lucas' girlfriend now." He said, and Peyton nodded. "Damn, I guess I'm too late than."

"For what?" She asked. "For you, you know, I used to have a crush on you since you were with Nathan. So young, so blond and so sexy in a cheerleading skirt." He said while smiling, she knew he was joking, but still somehow. Cooper saw the expression on her face.

"Just joking Peyton, but you're sexy, there's no way around. Those Scott boys really have a good taste in girls. I hope things work out better between you and Lucas than between you and Nathan." Peyton looked up at the handsome man who she was dancing with.

"I hope so too." She softly whispered. "It will Peyton, Lucas is different, Nathan back in time was a little too selfish and a little too much obsessed with basketball, and besides you weren't the one for him. And look at Lucas now." Peyton turned her head around to find Lucas dancing with his mom but never looking away from Peyton.

"He cares. He's watching you, seeing if I don't do something out of line. That loving look from the Scott boys. You look so happy Peyton, much happier than you were with Nathan. I am happy for you." He softly pressed a little kiss on the corner of her mouth when the song ended.

"What?" She was more than just surprised.

"Always wanted to do that." And walked away, but changed his mind and came back to hug her. "I hope that one day, you'll invite me to your wedding with Lucas."

"I will." She answered and hugged him tightly before letting him return to Rachel who looked extremely jealous.

Another hour past and Peyton was dancing with Lucas again, the music had become faster and so the dance moves became a lot sexier. Lucas couldn't get his hands off her anymore. His hands moved from her hair to her cheeks to her shoulder to her back to find their destiny when they reached her ass. Playfully he squeezed in her butt and it caused Peyton to moan into Lucas' mouth while they were sharing an intense lip-lock. Peyton wasn't too shy to respond on his actions, but when things got a little dirty for a wedding, they got interrupted.

"You two get a room." Nathan and Haley shouted together when they saw Lucas and Peyton's behaviour. A little embarrassed Peyton backed off and Lucas could only smile.

"Should we?" She asked and Lucas nodded heavy, sure they would need it.

Lucas and Peyton said goodbye to Nathan and Haley. "We'll be back in a few hours." Lucas said to Haley.

"I hope so for you Luke, do you know how intoxicating Peyton is? I guess we'll see you around after the honeymoon." Peyton slapped Nathan playful and than hugged him. Than they said goodbye to Karen. She took her son apart for a minute, and Peyton knew what they were talking about.

"You have condoms?" Lucas nodded, and Karen kept her motherly talk going, Lucas turned red from embarrassment so Peyton decided it was time to come between them.

"I am on birth control Karen." Karen looked up to her son's girlfriend and than to Lucas.

"Go you two, have some fun." Just after she said that, she kind of regret it because it sounded so weird because she know what her son and his girlfriend were going to do, but she hugged her son and then Peyton.

When they were outside, Lucas stopped and enjoyed the view of the beautiful nature. "I've got something for you." He reached in his pocket and than showed Peyton a beautiful golden locket. The breeze made the locket spun around, the golden glow from sun above in the sky made it even more magical.

"This is a part of Keith's inheritance. When I was in my freshman year, Keith and I, went away for a weekend. Just the two of us, a real man holiday. And we passed this old, little house, it was a store owned by an old couple. We went inside because it started to rain and inside Keith fell in love with these lockets." And Lucas' hand disappeared in his other pocket and an exact copy of the first locket was in his other hand. "These two lockets are meant to be together. Just like us." He said softly and his eyes had this notable kind of glance. "Keith bought them and I'll never forget what he said after we left the store." He took a deep breath and swallowed away the upcoming tears. He quoted Keith. "I bought these lockets with a very, very special reason Luke. If I ever marry your mom, than I'll give one to her and one will be mine. But if I don't marry her before you found the girl you want to spend the rest of your life with, they will be yours."

A few tears got lost on his sun-kissed cheeks. "And now they will be ours." He said softly, Peyton also had problems with her tears. She allowed her lips to touch his and kissed away his salt tears. She hold him in her embrace, looked up to this strong boy who wasn't afraid anymore to show how he really felt. He wasn't invincible anymore.

After a while they let go of each other, Lucas' tears were dried. "May I?" He asked and in his open hand laid the locket shaped in the form of a heart. Peyton nodded and Lucas carefully putted it on, with his blue eyes full of not cried tears and unspoken words, reflecting his feeling of love for Peyton. He wanted to print every detail in his memory, every single thing; how the sky looked, how the flowers smelled, how the clouds were shaped, how Peyton looked from head to toe, ….

Everything.

After that Peyton carefully putted the other locket on Lucas' neck, his eyes still watery, now she knew he wasn't unshakable, that was what she needed to now, that she somehow wasn't the weakest, that other people could be won over by life too.

"Look." Lucas said softly letting his voice blow with the soft breeze. He turned her locket around and there was a tiny key in the back of it, with one swift motion he clicked it out of place. When Peyton looked closer, she saw a little keyhole in the front of the locket.

Lucas took the key and opened his own locket, he took Peyton's hand and moved it to his locket so she could take his key out of the locket. She did it and than he guided her hand to her own locket and let her open it. A picture of him was revealed, in his locket there was a picture of her.

She was surprised, it here pictures they had token a few days back. Peyton had styled Lucas' hair in the way she thought it was the best on him, and Lucas said to Peyton how he liked her hair the most so she could do it like that. They had token pictures of it in her backyard by the flowers, now she knew why.

"With your key you can open my locket, and with my key I can open your locket. So we have to be with each other to see the photos. Tell me you'll never leave me Peyton." He brushed his cheek against hers.

"I'll never leave you Lucas Scott." She answered and kissed him so tenderly, it was the tenderest kiss she had ever given to someone. "I can't because you have the key of my heart." She said and he smiled, he looked so beautiful. "And you have mine." It was true, under all the Brooke-stuff, there was a gorgeous blonde who had he key of his heart, now and forever.

Twenty minutes later they both stood for the door of a motel room.

"Close your eyes Peyton." He whispered in her ear.

"Why?" She asked curiously. He groaned softly but not angry.

"Just do it." And so she did.

Gently he leaded her in the room. She could feel his burning breath in her neck, causing her to shiver. "You can open your eyes now." He whispered in her ear. Peyton opened her eyes and saw a motel room full with candles and petals of red and white roses.

"Luke?!" She turned around and found him smiling so bright.

"How did you know I would?" He wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I've been watching you for a few days Peyton. I know today was going to be our day." He said softly and kissed her neck. Peyton leaned in to his touch, and his lips crawled higher to her ear. Very loving he caught her earlobe and nibbled on it. Peyton moaned and than turned around so she could give him a full kiss on the mouth.

Lucas' hands glided over the soft material of her red dress and wanted to take it off but Peyton stopped him. Playful she pushed him towards the bed, and when he finally sat she did a few passes backwards and began to remove her dress very slowly, letting it fall on the ground. Then she took the hairpins out of her hair, the blond locks fell playful around her shoulders. Lucas' eyes got big when his eyes explored her bare skin. Her red underwear made the heat inside his chest grew with a several degrees.

Then she walked towards him and made him stand up again. First she took of his jacket of his tuxedo while very slowly sucking on his neck. Her fingers got more demanding while she removed his waistcoat and the rest of his clothes. After a few minutes the only thing he wore was his black boxers and he had one love-bit on his neck and one on his stomach.

Their moment was approaching fast, Peyton began to feel nervous now it was going to happen fast, Lucas should have noticed it, he kissed her kindly to make her feel better, reassuring her, it was going to be alright.

"You look so hot, you, can you do something hot?" He whispered in ear on a light and playful tone. It caused Peyton to giggle quietly and brought her lips to his ear.

"Sure I can." She guaranteed him.

Very slowly she removed his boxers while looking up to Lucas to see how his face changed from expressions. His face was really amused. She gentle took a hold of his manhood.

Carefully she took him into her mouth and began her torture. Peyton slowly sucked on his cock, she began to move faster as she felt his excitement grow.

"Peyton." He groaned while her flexible fingers moved between his legs. When Peyton felt how close he was, she smiled and a few seconds later he made clear he had reached the top of his pleasure by letting out a little scream.

"God Peyton." He sighed and fisted his hands through her hair. Peyton looked up to him, her green eyes asking him if he had enjoyed it. His answer came in a long kiss that made them both breathless.

Quickly Lucas recovered from his orgasm and lifted Peyton off the floor and laid here on the bed that was covered with petals from red roses. Gently he removed her strapless bra and her panties, and tenderly he parted her legs and smiled at her. The look in his eyes was so intense, it made her feel warm inside.

Suddenly he buried his face between her legs which caused Peyton to moan out loud. He began to suck on her most sensitive spot. She couldn't help it and kept moaning and whispering his name. When Lucas' fingers helped his mouth and tongue, Peyton clenched her fingers in the white sheets on the bed. A set of little moans escaped Peyton's mouth. The pleasure that his tongue brought made Peyton shift heavy. When Lucas noticed she couldn't keep her hips still, he stopped for a moment. Peyton let out a disappointed moan when she lost his touch. But than she let her hands travel through his soft blond hair, on his face you could read his extreme pleasure and own excitement.

"I need you Luke." She whispered faint.

"Peyton?" He wasn't done with her yet.

"Please Lucas." She pleaded.

"You're sure?" He asked and she nodded, convincing him.

Her lips found his and in no time their tongues were battling again. Lucas pulled her out of the bed to admire her perfect naked body. God, those killer legs! Her whole body was so amazing, from head to toe. Her green, breath stealing eyes were so naughty and innocent at the same time, they drove him wild.

Even they had seen each other naked before, this was still overwhelming. They had showered together a several times and they almost always changed their cloths in the same room. Why hiding your body if you know someday the other will see it without an excuse? But this was so intense, so real, and inevitable.

Peyton bit on her lower lip and her eyes were in awe of his athletic torso and those cool blue eyes. He was so handsome, she felt herself so attracted to him. She just couldn't escape, but she didn't mind being locked up with this dazzling body.

He made his way over to her again and kissed her firm, she felt his hardness against her inner thigh and she broke away. "We're playing it safe, right?" She softly asked while the candlelight danced across his strong face. Even she was on birth control, she didn't want to take that risk of 1 that it could go wrong. He nodded and walked over to his tuxedo and he came back with more than five condoms in his hand.

"Well, well Lucas Scott! Are you so unstoppable?" Peyton teased.

"If you only knew Peyton Sawyer! I hope you didn't plan anything other today." Lucas said while his lips rested on her jaw line.

"How would I dare?" She replied and brushed her hands through his velvet dirty blond hair.

Eagerly he crushed his lips over hers. His hands went to her ass, impatient.

"Luke." She broke away from his again, a dirty moan left his mouth, causing Peyton to tremble a little.

"I am so glad we've made it, I'm so in love with you." She smiled and her fingers slid along his lips. "We've waited for so long." She said longing.

"And now we can finally have it." He answered, repeating those famous lines of their history.

"I love you." His eyes were so warm and loving.

"I love you too." Peyton said softly and allowed him to kiss her again.

Lucas lifted her up and threw her on the bed gently, letting her sink in the mattress with this sudden action. It caused Peyton to groan. After a few seconds Lucas' body hang over hers.

Their eyes speaking instead of their lips, making an agreement that would change everything, their eyes said more than a million words ever could.

When he entered her, their eyes made contact, the blue ones gazing into the green ones, and the green ones gazing into the blue ones. The moment they had been waiting on for years, now it was finally there, no turning back. No running away.

Lucas slowly began to move, never losing eye-contact, until her eyes blinked and she let out a hiss, her face twisted in a painful expression. "Peyton?" Lucas saw her face going from pleasure to pain in just a few seconds.

"It's okay Luke." She reassured him. "It's just been awhile." She whispered and pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

She hadn't had sex with anyone since 'their last night', the same involved for Lucas. He and Brooke hadn't exactly a sex life after Keith died, and somehow, Lucas was happy about it now.

Lucas was very careful and gentle, trying his best not to hurt her. Their rhythm grew from slow and sensual to fast and reaching higher and higher in the spiral of pleasure. Every part of their bodies was involved in the game of love.

As good as the touch of a hand could feel, as soft as the press of a pair of lips could sense on a sun-kissed skin. As sensual as the touch of skin on skin could make ran shivers from your spine. As strong as the power of words spoken in ecstasy could make you fly higher than you could have ever imagined. As amazing as the feeling of being one after a journey of many confusing years could make you dance inside.

While they were making love, a flood of adoring words poured around them.

"You're so beautiful Peyton. Amazing … you feel so good." Continued by Peyton's soft voice. "You feel so … incredible Lucas."

Their breathing grew heavier, their actions more demanding. A gasping Lucas picked up their pace, reaching his climax. As he came, Lucas let out a sound, something between a very loud moan and a quiet scream filled with the syllables of her name. Feverish he kept his hand sneaked between them and found her special spot. His finger flew over it and did is magic as she flew over the edge into her climax, screaming out his name with all the left over power in her body.

Panting they lay in each others arms, not wanting to break the chains that hold them upon this magical moment.

"Luke?" Her voice sounded renewed.

"Peyton." He replied. "I'll love you forever Lucas Eugene Scott." Their hands tangled together.

"I'll love you forever and a day Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer." He said formal. They both smiled and Lucas pulled Peyton to his side, into his loving arms.

They fell asleep with intertwined hands, the same thoughts of their forever love. Their lockets lay against each other. The mysterious rhythm of their hearts slowed down and months after the first time, they were sharing different heartbeats in one moment. Reality was running them by on the pace of the anonymous promise … forever and a day.


	27. Almost Perfect, So Overrated

**_A/N: I am still searching for a beta-reader for this story so if anyone feels like helping me out, let me know. Much love ... Veronique_**

**Almost Perfect, So Overrated (Everything Is)**

Waking up never felt this good Lucas thought. It could never be better than this ... waking up from a protective slumber after making love to the girl you love more than anything.

Never anything felt this much like a dream to him. The bright sun peeking through the curtains, his naked body wrapped in soft white sheets, his hand entangled with the one of the love of his life lying next to him. Peyton seemed to glow to him, her skin seemed bronze, her hair was just like gold, and her eyes would be perfect emeralds. He totally dreamed away.

But he soon was brought back to reality when he heard Peyton sob against him.

"Hey Peyton. Don't cry!" He softly whispered, travelling back from his dream state, slightly confused by what was happening.

"Oh my God, did I hurt you?" He asked worried.

"No, no." She guaranteed him. "You were amazing Luke." Lucas was relieved, but not sure if she was okay.

"Was it too early? We should have waited longer ..." Peyton broke him off.

"I'm crying out of happiness Luke." She softly said while smiling.

Lucas was relieved and cuddled the beautiful girl in his arms, felt those tears of joy on her slightly flushed cheeks against his skin. A shudder shot through his body, and her tears on his skin forming gooseflesh on his skin. Enjoying it through, silently wishing he could stay this way forever, for once in his life everything seemed almost perfect.

"I love you." Making this even near the perfection more. His whisper made her feel suddenly nervous and took away her ability to respond. Lucas sensed how she stiffened in his arms. Then he saw the uneasy look on her face.

"Hey, baby what's wrong?" He beamed up above her, his finger played with a curl of her blond hair.

"Nothing." She mumbled and shifted a bit away from him. And then he read it on her face, the fresh anxiousness.

"Peyton." He said stern but not letting it get on as 'punishment'.

"Nothing." She whispered again, but it was so weak, it didn't even come near to convince Lucas. He quietly sighed, looking at her soothingly.

"There's something on your mind baby girl, so please don't lie, let me in." Lucas' voice sounded somehow desperate.

"Lucas, I ..." She began with a small voice.

"Peyton, the moment before you say you're crying out of happiness and this moment you're totally shutting down." The amount of patience decreased and she felt in the way his body language spoke.

"Don't be mad at me Luke." She said, preventing herself from a sob. "This is just new for me. Knowing you're in this not just for the sex that you're in it to stay." And immediately he regretted his tone towards her.

"Baby girl, believe me when I say." He said forcefully and without any sign of hesitation, followed by a soft kiss on her forehead. "That I am in this to stay." A kiss on her cute nose. "I am in this to make me, but mostly you and even more us happy." His warm blue eyes staring loving into her teary one. But it was okay, he knew it when she softly captured his lips with hers and her hands began to massage his abs. After a minute she softly broke it off, looking hopefully in her boyfriend eyes.

"What about we celebrate our new happiness?" He asked, his hand touching her still bare shoulder.

"You naughty boy." She said but wicked grin formed on her pretty face and she answered his question with a deep kiss.

"I'll take that as a yes." He said breathlessly after he broke it with an urgent need for air.

"More than a yes." She whispered against the skin of his neck, crawling on top of him. An excited cry escaped Peyton's mouth when Lucas flipped them over, the white sheets twisting around them, the rose petals everywhere.

With a vigorous passion Lucas began to attack the place where her shoulder met her neck. His lips built a soft pressure on it, sucking on it, nibbling on it, biting on it leaving Peyton to lie there, scratching her nails into his back to suppress her groans and cries from the incredible pressure that nestled in her stomach.

"Don't try to be quiet baby." Lucas said, leaving the bruised skin for what it was, after he saw her fight to keep her moans inside. "I know you want to cry out in pleasure." But her green eyes challenged his, an eyebrow chocking up almost daring. "Isn't it?" His hand shot out to find its destiny between her legs, finding her warm centre there and this time Peyton couldn't help but almost groan out.

"See." He said, with boyish pride. "So you like to play dirty Scott." And rolled them over so she was on top again, she sat up exposing her body in full glory, naked and all his to adore.

With a heated and chaste kiss on his lips she began her slow torture. The kiss that began on his mouth was the first of a trail of shot and warm kisses on his body, straight over his throat and sucking slightly on his Adam's apple. Then it made his way over his chest while her hands gently fondled the tanned skin of his sides, letting him shiver. And the caresses of her lips went lower and lower, causing him to shift while he tried to hold back in his pleasured groans.

Her blond hair disappeared under the sheets, and the places she found became more intimate and Lucas' tries to stifle the signs of pleasure become hopeless. "See." She stated satisfied, Lucas merely rolled his eyes before lying back, enjoying this too much. Her soft humming making him all eagerly again while she played with his manhood, ready to welcome into warm mouth when his cell phone ringed out of the blue.

Lucas tried to get up but Peyton didn't let him. "Leave it Lucas." She said while stroking his inner tights, beginning her torture again but the phone kept ringing. Again Lucas tried to reach for it and this time she let him, shooting him a naughty look, not ready to give this up.

Her mouth spoiled his most intimate places with kisses and Lucas could barely hide his delight and had a hard time focusing to listen to whatever his mom was saying. Peyton was ready to end the phone call for him, ready to pleasure him even more but then his voice was like a bucket of ice splashed on her back.

"Nathan jumped off that bridge, mom?" Immediately Peyton stopped every action and started at Lucas in disbelief who was trying to calm down her mom over the phone. "Me and Peyton will be right there, just calm down." And Lucas shot Peyton a quick look and she right away knew what to do, getting dressed.

She forced herself back into her red dress after slipping on her underwear, a thousand questions ran across her mind when she recognize panic is his otherwise always strong voice. A minute later also Lucas started dressing with trembling fingers.

"What happened Luke?" She asked while she walked over to him, buttoning his waistcoat for him because his finger didn't let him.

"No time Peyton, get to the car. Wait there." He hurried away in the separate direction as her. Her feet moved quickly to the car and his to the reception room.

'What happened?' She wondered. 'What was happening?' Ugly thoughts began to transform into fears. Hadn't she just promised minutes before she was going to be happy from now on? But happiness didn't seem to be something that stayed in her life for long, because it was already sucked away and replace by the constant fear she lived in.

The minutes Lucas was separated from her seemed more like hours, they went by so slow, painfully slow. And when he neared her finally, his steps were so lifeless, barely making the distance decrease. Without saying a word they stepped in, fastened their seatbelts and Lucas speed off.

"Whoah, what's happening Luke?" Peyton asked, not very comfortable with his abnormal fast speed. He took a deep breath before looking away from the road and to his girlfriend. "Nathan and Haley got into a car accident with Nathan and Uncle Cooper. And from my mom's babbling I picked up that Rachel and Cooper end up in the water and Nathan jumped after them and leaving Haley there upset and Nathan hasn't come up yet and it's minutes ago." Peyton silenced, trying to let this sudden flood of words sink in, but the only thing she heard was the loud banging of her heart.

The roads turned from unfamiliar to familiar, to the road were 'the' bridge was on. And from far they could see a brunette holding a girl in a white dress, a red car and a silver car pulled over the road. Lucas slowed down as they neared them, and almost jumped out rushing over to his mother and his best friend, followed by Peyton.

"He still hasn't come up yet." Karen said, holding an outrageous Haley in her arms who cried like there was no tomorrow.

"Nathan." She kept sobbing and for Lucas it didn't take that long to decide what to do next.

"Did you call 911?" He asked his mother while yanking off his jacket. And she only could nod.

Lucas stepped to the edge of the bridge where the limo had run through. He took a few steps backwards and Peyton saw his body preparing for the measure jump into the water, but she ran over to him, clung onto him for dear life just before he tried to jump.

"Peyton." An unexpected sob broke though on his chest.

"Lucas don't." Her voice was fragile.

"I love you." Clenching her hands full with his dress shirt.

"But I have to do this, that's my brother down there, my friends." He said seriously and removed her arms from around his body.

"And I love you too Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer." A gentle and fast kiss against the skin of her forehead. And before she could even do anything else, she saw him jumping off the bridge, his body fall down into the water, making is split up and she could hear and see the water dive up to welcome him. Peyton saw how his body went under the water before rising back up, and with him, also another male body, but through her tears she couldn't see if it was Nathan or Cooper.

Ready to cry out again she was cut off by Karen.

"Peyton come here." She screamed to her, and what could she else do? With a painful effort she got up and walked over to the mother of her boyfriend and her friend.

"Look after her, I am going down there." And her finger pointed at the steep sandy road down to the water. She knew she didn't have to protest against the older woman, she did what was necessary in this awful situation.

"Haley?" Peyton whispered to her friend who now lay in her arms, crying and sobbing, whispering words which barely made it through the sobs. "Nathan." She cried out while she even held the girl tighter.

"Ssshhh." Peyton whispered soothingly, trying her best not to fall into her own tears. Her fears were slowly eating away her from the inside out, knowing her boyfriend with a heart disease and her best friend lay in that water, and also a classmate and a man she knew for years now.

"I love you Nathan." She heard Haley whisper, her slender fingers brushed through her hair when she hold her tighter, closer to her heart that was beating in her chest at the pace of a car in full speed.

"Always and forever." She heard her friend whisper before the sobbing got heavier again, from the corner of her eyes she saw Karen disappear from her view.

It seemed like hours before the blue siren was visible from far, joined by the terrible noise that you could hear from blocks away. Finally they stopped, and from that point Peyton realised that this wasn't a dream or rather said nightmare like she hoped, 'cause when she flickered with her eyes, she saw two ambulances, one with an unconscious Cooper and also unconscious Rachel and another with an unconscious Nathan.

"Youngman?" A man in white coat appeared them. "You have to join me to the hospital." He said.

"No I am just fine, the others are in much terrible conditions." Nodding over the two ambulances.

"Let's see than." And he gently grabbed Lucas' arm, a stifled hiss from the blond boy's side followed.

"I am afraid you'll have to join us, that wound doesn't look too promising." And Lucas hadn't even noticed his shirt was tore and it was dirty and red. Blood was tickling down his arm to his hand, a small but long cut ran over his arm.

"We need to look at that, just step in." And he took him to an ambulance. "Go to my mom and Haley, Peyton." He said when he saw his girlfriend standing there, lost.

She nodded and saw the ambulances take off, it took her almost everything to turn around and step towards the two other women.

Karen was holding Haley in her arms, the poor girl was looking near white and she was shivering, her body couldn't bear the exhausted sobs. Tenderly the older woman rocked her, looking worried up at her son's girlfriend. "Who is going to drive?" Peyton asked carefully, seeing two cars available standing there and three persons. "You two are upset, I drive, and you and Haley go in the backseat." Karen said simply. "My car." Peyton simply said, pointing at the Mercury. "Wait I'll call Skills."

Peyton took a few steps away from the two other women, searched in her phonebook for Skills number, it would have been easier and swifter if her fingers didn't tremble that much. She pressed the phone against her ear, hearing the familiar noises but wished they would end soon she would hear Skills voice. And it came ...

"Hey hey, isn't that my favourite Blondie? Hey girl, what's up?" And Peyton felt like shutting down, she was never good in a crisis, no words seemed available. But then her eyes began to take everything in, Lucas' car where Nathan and Haley had been driving with, untouched because the police needed it, the limo in the water, her broken down friend and her ever to be mother in law.

"Skills, I need you to pick up my car on the Melina Bridge. Nathan and Haley got in accident with Cooper and Rachel. It's too much to explain right now." She quickly said when she heard his voice trying to interrupt in disbelief.

"I'll leave the keys on the driver's seat under the Led Zeppelin CD's, so want you pick him up and drive him to the hospital?" She heard Skills hesitance for a moment, and she understood. It was so much information on such a short time.

"Okay Peyton, I'll do it." She smiled relieved.

"Thanks Skills, I owe you big time." She said before hanging up.

Somehow Peyton never had been this relieved to be in the hospital. The drive had been awful, Karen driving, she and Haley in the backseat. And Haley had almost lost it when Karen had used the brakes a little too forceful. She kept repeating the lines from when they were on the bridge like a mantra, and strangely she kept rubbing her belly.

At a rapid pace three walked through the hospital halls.

"We're here to see Nathan and Lucas Scott, they were in an car accident." Karen said to the nurse after the desk. The nurse nodded and looked towards Haley, she was like a mess in Peyton's arms.

"Who are you?" She asked simply, and Haley looked like she would lose it. Karen soon cut her off before the anger of a hurt wife would come out.

"I am Lucas Scott mother and the aunt of Nathan Scott and this is Nathan's wife." She said pointing to Haley. "And she is Lucas' girlfriend." Pointing with her finger to Peyton. Again the black-haired nurse nodded.

"They are still running tests on Nathan Scott and Lucas Scott is being checked and threaded for his wounds." The women sighed, but still unsure to be relieved or not.

"Can I go see Lucas Scott?" Peyton asked with a small voice.

"He's in the examine room at the end of the hallway. Knock at the door and hear what the doctor says." She simply answered her before returning her attention back to her desk.

Peyton took four steps towards Lucas was before she turned back. "Do you want to come with me Karen?" And she cursed herself for not asking immediately.

"Just go Peyton, it's fine. I'll stay with Haley." The girl was still crying and clinging on Karen for dear life. Peyton only nodded and took a step closer towards the room where her boyfriend was.

Strangely she couldn't help but feel strange and nervous. This day was supposed to be a happy day for her and Lucas, for Nathan and Haley. And once again, true Tree Hill fashion it seemed, a blissful day turned into another nightmare. How could they ever be happy? And every step she made closer to the place where the blond Scott boy was, every movement of her feet made the question pushier.

And finally she reached the door, and she knocked on it gently, knocking the question away in her mind. She didn't hear any reaction and a worry began to slightly form, but then the door was opened by an older nurse.

"I am here to see Lucas Scott." Peyton quietly said after an uncomfortable silence.

"And you are?" The nurse said with a warm voice.

"I am Peyton Sawyer, Lucas' girlfriend." She answered, rubbing over her bare arms.

"I don't think you are allowed here." She said but suddenly another voice crashed in the conversation.

"Peyton?" It was Lucas. "Mister Scott." And another male voice joined.

Peyton peeked into the room and saw Lucas sitting there, a doctor in his forties holding his hurt arm. They both shared a look. "You can let her in." The man said. The nurse stepped back and let Peyton in who almost ran over to Lucas, and he could only smile at her.

"We're almost done. Only a bandage for on your arm, and checking you over again, seeing if we didn't miss anything." Peyton kissed Lucas' cheek softly before sitting down on a chair in the room. She watched how the doctor bandaged the wound that extended from a little above his elbow until his shoulder, right through 'Brooke's' tattoo. Lucas let out a groan suddenly, but directly bit back a second one when he looked at Peyton sitting a little away from him.

The doctor couldn't help but laugh.

"You're being a tough guy for her, don't you?" He asked so softly Peyton wouldn't hear it, but Lucas only smiled, and smiled wider when he looked at the curly blonde.

This pain was nothing, he thought. This pain wasn't even anything compared with what he would feel if he had to be here without her, if he had been sitting without Peyton by his side. Again tragedy had found its way in his life. When he closed his eyes he could see it all again, every time it came around in his life, why did it have to be this hard, this much? And not in only his life, but in the lives of everyone he loved. Why wasn't their a time in their lives they couldn't be without trouble? Why, what did they do wrong to deserve all of this? He and his friends were still so young, not even out of high school, why did all of it happen?

His busy thinking was interrupted by the older male's voice.

"The nurse is going to do the last check up, so I can write some things down in your files." Lucas nodded and the nurse took over, doing a normal routine.

When she went to listen to his heart and Lucas sat there without anything to cover his upper body the nurse voice returned in a worried tone.

"That's an ugly bruise you've got there?" Pointing at his stomach. The doctor turned around to see, and found it immediately, the hickey on the young boy's abdomen.

"How did you get that?" The nurse asked, touching the skin around it carefully. Lucas turned red and so did Peyton. The doctor looked at the blonde girl who was nervously rubbing over the place where her neck and shoulder met, having a similar dark spot there.

"I don't think that's a bruise he got from the accident. I don't think he doesn't mind to have this bruise." The older man said laughing and the nurse suddenly got it and looked slightly disgust.

"You're ready to go Mister Scott." The doctor said five minutes later, and glad he stood up, took Peyton by the hand and leaded her outside.

"God, we were so busted." Peyton mumbled when the exited the room. Lucas only smiled and pressed a sweet kiss on her cheek.

"Let's go see Haley and mom okay?"

And they found them, sitting the waiting room, Haley somewhat calmed down but still on the verge of tears, Karen still holding her, trying to comfort her. Deb had joined them. Lucas looked at Peyton reassuringly before letting go of her hand and taking Haley's in his, guiding her to stand up.

"It's al going to be okay Hales." He whispered while stroking though her long hair. He was about to continue his comforting when another doctor came up to them.

"Are you all here for Nathan Scott?" And Haley would have jumped on the doctor if Lucas hadn't tightened his grip. "Yes." Karen said, Deb agreed and the three teens nodded.

"He's okay, he's waking up. You can go see him, but I would want to speak to you Deb and you Haley after you see him." Both women shared a look and then nodded, and then they all took of to Nathan's room.

Everyone took place, Karen and Deb on two sofa looking chairs, Haley on Nathan's bed and Lucas on a chair, Peyton on his lap. And then there was silence, long silence full with kindly unspoken emotions.

And then, then Nathan opened his eyes to be greeted by five pairs of other eyes.

"Nathan!" Haley cried out and began to cry on his chest, leaving her husband amazed. But instantaneously he began to rub her back affectionate and comforting.

"It's all right Haley." He whispered softly, kissing her hair. And the others let their breaths escape.

"You got us so worried Nathan." Lucas was the first to break the silence again.

"It's all fine now." Nathan softly said and the others looked at him, hoping that for once it could be true ...


	28. Peace, Love and Understanding

**(What's So Funny 'bout) Peace, Love And Understanding **

Morning.

A time of ultimate peace, that soothing feeling when you wake up and see through the darkness of a new day. A time to think about everything and everyone, about this world you live in, and to hopefully enjoy your life, make the best out of it because you love it. A time for your mind to start over again after a thankful escape when you fell asleep. For a new chance, a new day, to understand that life is moving. That there is no reason why you should be chained on the past. What's done is done, even we want to change it so desperately, it will not happen, even if it's your only and deepest wish. And that the future is only a longing that will not move faster to get closer to you, even if that would be your strongest desire. Life is the present, you're trapped in it, wanting it or not. It's in the middle of it all, after everything that happened and between what's yet to come. And you have to understand that's for the best, that balance is the best thing in life.

Silence was as comfortable in the room as the warmth of the blankets wrapped around Peyton's body. Contently she breathed in and out, feeling strangely light as a feather but deep as the Atlantic Ocean. Her eyes danced over the ceiling of the room, feeling lazily intense, imaginary tied down. Her eyelids were about to flutter close when she heard a painful groan rise up from beside her.

"Good morning Luke." The words wrapped in Peyton's voice rolled out of her mouth while she rolled over the bed to see Lucas lying on the ground.

"Good morning Peyton." His voice came out sore, sounding as uncomfortable as the look on his face. Slowly he brought himself to sit up, the childish duvet falling from his upper body, revealing a bare chest and abdomen. His strong arms reached out in the air, his head slightly fell to his left shoulder, a deep breath made his broad chest swell. A groan follows when the muscles in his body stretched out. Then his arms fell into his lap and he looked lazily at Peyton.

Without saying a word Peyton offered him her hand, he took it with a smile and let Peyton help him to get him on his feet again. Once Lucas was back up on his feet, he walked to the front of his bed before falling down on it, making the mattress complain underneath him, almost crashing Peyton.

"I am sitting here too remember." She said, hovering above her boyfriend who lay down on the bed, his face looking pretty tired and twisted.

"Yeah, you stole my bed." He mumbled with his eyes still closed.

"I didn't steal it. Just be glad we talked your mom out of you sleeping on the couch okay." Peyton's voice followed and her hands reached out to caress the sides of Lucas' face.

"I hate this. She's controlling our sex life." He pouted and opened his eyes to meet Peyton's one.

It was true. Since Karen knew her son and his girlfriend had crossed the edge to full intimacy she had forbidden them to sleep in the same bed, not bearing the thought they would do it under her roof when she was at home. First she had suggested Lucas would sleep on the couch and Peyton in his bed, but the two teenagers had talked her out of it in time. Now Lucas slept on an airbed next to his bed. First the two had thought that if Lucas just lay on his airbed in time in the morning, Karen wouldn't complain. That was a smart plan until they found out Karen controlled them four times a night.

Karen was determined to let her plan work. If she said they wouldn't spend the night in the same bed they wouldn't. So she checked them. First time an half hour after the two went to sleep, the second time when she went to sleep, the third the time gets up at 3 am to check them and the last time when she gets up to begin the day. After three days of trying both blonds realised that they better gave in into what Karen wanted.

"Everything hurts." Lucas complained, a yawn escaped and his blue eyes looked at her pleadingly. Peyton smiled and placed her hands underneath his shoulder, helping him to sit up and the edge of the bed.

"Poor Rakeboy." She whispered softly while her hands began to massage his shoulders. Her slender hands kneading the flesh underneath her hands with long movements. Her skilled fingers digging into the skin, pressuring the sore muscles in a good way, hoping to relieve the tension on his body.

"Mmm." He groaned out in approval, pushing his shoulders backwards to Peyton, feeling the soreness slightly melt under her magical touch.

"Does that feel good?" Peyton's breath tickled his ear, making him push his frame slightly against her.

"Yeah." He moaned, feeling contently happy with their close body contact they had to miss during the nighttimes.

"But I bet this feels much better." Her warm breath collided on his jaw before her lips began to nibble on his neck, her arms sneaking around his chest.

"It does." Leaning his head to his left shoulder, giving her better access to his tanned skin, his arms creeping backwards, his big hands finding their place on the small of her back.

"It sucks to sleep on the floor, I miss you in my arms." Lucas muttered causing Peyton to stop for a moment.

"Me too. Let me make it up to you." She spoke softly, her lips finding his as he turned his head. His hands dropped to her butt, softly kneading it making her moan out in his mouth. He loved the feel of her silken briefs under his fingertips.

Peyton was ready to slip her tongue into his sweet mouth when the door flew open.

"Lucas!" There stood his mom, in her bathrobe. Immediately the two broke apart.

"I swear, I slept on the airbed mom." Lucas began. "I swear. It's still warm." He sounded so ridiculous but he didn't want a punishment like sleeping on the couch that he knew he would get if he didn't convince her from the opposite.

Seeing the shocked and ashamed look on the curly blonde's face, she decided to believe him. When she had last checked they both had been in separated beds and besides they had been acting like angels this week, helping her.

"I believe you, but now get up, it's time for some breakfast kids." She said and disappeared to the kitchen, leaving both teenagers there embarrassed.

"God. She has a freaking sixth sense or something." Lucas groaned.

"Stop the complaining. Just let's go have some breakfast." Peyton said while putting on a pair of red sweatpants looking not so strange matched with a black tee.

"You still stole my bed." Lucas said, crossing his arms childish. Peyton poked out her tongue, earning an even more childish pout from her boyfriend.

"I'll make it up to you later." She whispered softly, blowing him a kiss from the doorway. Lucas smiled and followed her to the kitchen.

After a delicious breakfast, Lucas walked back into his room, getting rid of his pyjama pants to leave him only in his blue boxers.

"Looks like somehow is happy to see me?" A voice rose up behind him. That voice, with a sharp move he turned around to see Brooke standing in the doorway of his backdoor. Mentally he cursed himself for having Peyton's fault habit of not locking the door running over to him.

"Brooke, what are you doing here?" He asked irritated, feeling a red blush spreading from his neck over his face. Quickly he putted in his jeans on.

"We haven't seen each other in a while, I thought it would be fun to bring you a little visit." She said, walking closer to him.

"And I got something for you." She brought one arm up with a brown paper back while she let finger run down his still bare chest, 'causing him to shiver.

"Do you miss me Lucas?" She brought her lips up to his ear, just a breath away. Lucas froze.

"I know you do." She breathed heavily.

"How could you not?" And suddenly her hand dropped dramatically low. Low enough for Lucas to almost lose it, a place where Brooke's hands were not allowed, not anymore.

"Stop it Brooke." With shaking hands he pushed her away.

"Why are you here anyway?" Trying to gain in his confidence back.

"I thought I would bring you something, love." Lucas' eyes went sceptical but he couldn't hide his curiosity.

Slowly her hand disappeared in the brown bag and her hand appeared again, a box with chocolate chip cookies balancing on her palm.

"I know you like them …" Her voice came out in a way Lucas always had been turned on by, but this time, it only made his stomach twist painfully.

In the mean time Peyton was dancing through the hallway of the house, softly humming Jimmy Eat World's 'Work', brushing her teeth, the cloths she would wear today on her left arm. She was about to enter Lucas' bedroom when she heard voices. Peeking through the door, finding Lucas standing there, Brooke only a breath away from his lips.

"I also know some other thing you like." She saw a finger of the brunette make a trace over her boyfriend's still bare chest. And Peyton immediately froze on the spot she stood, unable to move, her breath getting stuck in her throat.

This one move of this one girl made Peyton's mind race, a million thoughts ran through mind that suddenly was fully awake now. All those imagines and scenarios that appeared in her head, blowing up from innocent to something far and far away from that same innocence. Faster than she had expected, her breakfast was fighting to come up again and her blood disappearing from her face, the flushed colour from before fading to pale white. Her mind was on the edge to stop working and black out when Lucas finally did what he had to do.

"Stop it Brooke." He said, pushing her hand away from his body. But Brooke being, you know, just Brooke hadn't let herself turned down.

"Come Lucas. Remember how much fun we had together." She said in a fake innocent voice, pressing her body to his. Their chests touching, making Lucas shiver in cold response.

"You have to remember Lucas. What else do you think about when she haves you sleep on the floor?" She said, leaning closer again. Lucas was about to open is mouth to protest but the brunette was quicker.

"I never let you sleep on the floor. And if your mother had you, I always made it up to you, remember." Again she leaned closer.

"In the hallway. In the kitchen. In the living room. In the bathroom." Her body neared dangerously. "Definitely the bathroom. Before the m-"

And in less than a second her thumb was softly stroking the spine of his lower back. Immediately Lucas jumped back.

"Lucas Scott. Since when are you so jumpy? You used to like that remember." Nervously he started to melt from his frozen position, his mind anxiously wondering where Peyton was.

"Okay okay. I get it, your freaking precious Peyton." She said with a voice full of disgust. And before neither of them could blink Brooke pressed a kiss on the corner on her ex-boyfriend's mouth.

"Bye baby boy." She said flirty before leaving through the backdoor, leaving Lucas tumbling from the one emotion into the other, feeling strangely lost.

The moment the door fell into lock again, Lucas began to move feverish. His hands getting lost in his thick hair, his chest rising swiftly and the falling never had enough to fade away.

Peyton saw his uneasiness from the place where she was 'hidden' but experienced the same. She felt ill, like she had a fever and her head was hurting. Deep pounds hammered through her head. She nearly jumped into the ceiling when Lucas walked suddenly out of the door.

"Peyton?" His voice came out low and surprised. Glad she wasn't able to answer with the toothbrush stuck in her mouth she just shrugged her shoulders and walked back towards the bathroom but hearing Brooke's voice in her head she stumbled towards the kitchen.

Ten minutes later Peyton found herself in her boyfriend's car playing tensely with zipper of her bag.

"Do you feel okay?" Lucas asked, seeing his girlfriend beside him looking suspiciously pale. Her now almost white skin tone was a measure contract with the flushed one this morning.

"I am fine. Can we just get to school?" She asked uncomfortable shifting in the passenger's seat, her fingers trembling when she reached for the seatbelt.

When Lucas thought Peyton was being silent during the ride to school, it was nothing compared than during the school day. Every minute she could spend without Lucas, she did. Normally she hated to be away from him, but today she spent all her time with Kenzie. Even avoiding Nathan the best she could because she knew if he began to ask questions, she couldn't stop from telling it. With Kenzie things were different, they still didn't know each other that long, there was trust but they didn't force each other into sharing things they didn't want to share.

Lucas couldn't help but ask himself questions when he saw Peyton and Kenzie wandering over the court yard. Kenzie was babbling happily, it was easy to see from where he stood and Peyton just walked beside her, listening with only a half ear, distracted by her own thoughts. That was maybe less obvious to see for others, but for Lucas it was an easy one.

When the school day had ended, Lucas stood patiently waiting for Peyton against his car slightly enjoying the warmth of the autumn sun. Looking at his clock almost every minute he began to feel nervous. This obsessing feeling was tightening around his heart, he wondered if Peyton maybe had heard Brooke this morning or even worse, had seen her.

Watching the other students from Tree Hill High School pass him by, he expected his curly girlfriend soon but when he saw Kenzie without Peyton on her side, the obsessing feeling became stronger.

"Kenzie!" He shouted to get the girl's attention. Immediately she walked over to him.

"She's already at home. She needed some peace she said." The girl said before Lucas could ask anything.

"Thanks Kenzie." He responded, giving her a light hug.

Stepping into his car, starting it, Lucas decided to drive homewards after a few seconds of hesitation. If Peyton needed some peace, she would get it. She would come around automatically, he knew that. But he hoped it would be sooner rather than later. By the way, her sketchbook lay in his room and she couldn't do long without it.

Enjoying some Led Zeppelin music while making her homework, Peyton sat after her desk. She wasn't really focused, her thoughts kept distracting her, and they had done that the whole day.

The curly blonde closed her eyes, hoping the music would ease her. Finally she found the soothing affect she had hoped for the whole day when she heard something.

"Don't get too excited. I am just here to pick up some stuff I left here." Brooke said, coming through the doorway, leaving Peyton shocked. Never, never had she expected to see the brunette in her bedroom again.

"Or did you steal my cloths along with my boyfriend?" She said, her voice was like poison. Brooke disappeared in Peyton's closet before she could protest, coming out with one of her bags. Without saying anything the brunette walked through the doorway again to Peyton's great relieve. But her relieve didn't last long because she came back after only a few seconds.

"Why would you steal my cloths, they are way too girly for you." Brooke said arrogant.

"They are totally what Lucas likes. He likes real girls you know." She said, pointing at her outfit.

"Not tomboys." Pointing to Peyton's outfit. She was wearing a pair of knee length dark brace jeans, a dark grass green Lacoste polo and matching All Stars.

Suddenly helpless tears tickled after her eyes.

"Girls, you know. Humans with boobs." She said sharp, pushing her chest towards hers, giving the teary eyes access to look into her playful presented boobs trapped in a dark purple blouse.

"And the type of humans who like to show their legs and wear high heels." Peyton couldn't stop herself from looking at the white mini skirt the other girl was wearing at the purple pumps.

"He likes them like this." She shoved it even further into Peyton's mind, reminding her painfully at this morning. Hearing the voice carry on Peyton decided to slip into the music, she couldn't hear it anymore. If she tried hard enough maybe Brooke would disappear. And she did after another of ten minutes poising Peyton with her sick words.

Feeling the need to sketch, Peyton began to search after the precious item to come to the finding it was in her boyfriend's house after searching through her room for the fourth time.

After a short drive in her Comet, Peyton knocked on Lucas' bedroom door, waiting for an answer with a little heart.

"Hi Peyton." Lucas said, stepping slightly backward to let her in. And she did, with big steps she made her way to his desk. Somehow she couldn't be in his near proximity right now, it felt wrong.

Silence made his entrance through the gaps of the room, leaving both blond teenagers feeling uncomfortable.

"Peyton." He said after a while, noticing she was avoiding his gaze.

"What's wrong?" He asked, his feet making its way to her.

"No Luke." She said swiftly, pushing her hands out in front of her to distance him, he was just too close now.

A little astonished he stopped, his mind was filling with unbearable thoughts, remembering the last months as the ones of struggling. They had been struggling to get their eyes and souls open, they had been struggling out of denial and into a new world of being with each other. A world that didn't seem safe of the attacks of pain and sadness.

"Do I look like a boy?" Her voice out of the blue broke through.

"No, no. You don't. Why would you think that?" The back of his hand caressed her cheek after he had closed the distance between them.

"Brooke." The name rolled from her lips with much difficulty.

Lucas turned away in anger. "Why didn't you tell me straight away she has been upsetting you? You know you can tell it to me Peyton." He said urgent, trying to make her green eyes look at him, but with no avail.

"Why didn't you tell me straight away she has been upsetting you? You know you can tell it to me Lucas." Peyton repeated him lamely.

"Like you did!" Her voice came out with sudden anger.

With blue eyes wide open he stared at her, she knew. "You saw us this morning?" A lamer respond probably didn't exist.

"Like hell I did, when she was all drooling over you and you let her!" The anger inside her intensified.

"I didn't. I was surprised with her standing there at first, but I didn't want it. It's complicated!" A shout match at its beginning.

Anger heated up, but both of them silent, waiting for the other to continue but then …

"But she knows all those things about you, all those things I don't know." Peyton's voice was joined by a heartbreaking sob.

"Peyton, they are all sexually." The curly blonde before him bit on her lower lip, feeling tears dance after her eyes. "She knows them Luke!" She sniffed, Lucas was taken back where this situation had headed to in just seconds.

"It doesn't matter because this, us, is about so much more Peyton. About me waking up and needing to be with you. About me getting distracted when I am reading or just doing something. About me doing silly things just to make you laugh or to enjoy you. This is about me being in love for …" Without any warning she crashed her sweet lips down on his, her tongue demanding access to his warm mouth, and surprised by her sudden attack, he gave in, letting her form the pace of their lips while he just followed.

In only seconds they were fully using their option to pleasure each other with the movements of their lips. Their tongues stroking each other softly but his girlfriend suddenly got more demanding. Her hands disappearing under his shirt, her body pressing hard into his. Her unspoken message to him to touch her.

It was too much too soon. They just had experienced a serious fight, Lucas didn't want to take advantage of the situation they were all of a sudden placed into. He knew Peyton didn't want it because of their love, but some miserable need to prove Brooke wrong. Lucas didn't want that to be the base of sharing intimate moments.

So he slowed the pace back down, breaking it, not ready to give in the intentions Peyton had. Carefully he pulled her onto the bed with him.

"Peyton Sawyer, we are different. This isn't about sex, and it will never be. This is about us, us being in love." And he gazed into her green eyes so forcefully it made her breathless.

"So don't let us rush this. Let us just stay here and enjoy each other's company. Let us just share the love on our level, in our world." He whispered, pulling the curly blonde against his chest. His hand searched her, and found it, their finger laced. Peyton looked up at him, with teary eyes, but realising this was their way of sharing love … in all silence, in all nearness, in all genuineness.


	29. There's a Class For Love Meets Lust

**_A/N: Hi people. Warning: This chapter ends up as a long M-rated scene P (Okay, if my smut sucks, forgive me...I think it sucks at least) THANKS FOR REVIEWS, I never thought I would get this much reviews, still blown away. ... And, I am still in search for a beta-reader for this story, so if anyone feels like: yep, that's totally for me! ... Let me know. _**

**There's ****a Class For ... Love Meets Lust**

"So ladies and gentlemen. That's way that event was so important of the history of our country."

Peyton felt like she was drowning in boredom while her history teacher kept parading in front of the classroom, rambling words the blonde didn't hear anymore. Almost automatically the pencil moved in her hand, sketching little figures on her sheets of paper. Her look flew beside her, seeing Lucas deeply interested in the words their teacher spoke, penning down notes feverish.

'How could he be so interested into this?' She wondered while looking closer to his features. His face was so intense, his teeth slightly buried in his full lower lip, the pen in his hand leading a life on its own. He looked so concentrated while she felt herself bored to death.

Fun, that was what she needed. The realisation there were still two another classes after this made her want to die if she didn't already from weariness.

Staring at him, seeing him so intensely interested, the look on his face was so familiar. He looked the same way at her as they were making love. A sudden heat transformed into a wave of wetness. And suddenly she was all naughty and turned on. Along the wave daringness had travelled along, making her hand tingling, making it start its own life.

Easily her hand bridged the distance between her desk and Lucas to find his leg. He didn't seem to be interrupted by her, he was too much into the subject of the class and Peyton couldn't help to feel slightly annoyed.

She was in a desperate need for some body contact. It had been over a week since she and Lucas had made love, not that long, but for Peyton it was dragging and especially frustrating. Being so near to him all the time and not being able to use the opportunity fully was maddening. Over the past week opportunities had come along, and they had been close from time to time but always Karen had managed to walk in or call or interrupt in some sort of way. She almost had to believe Lucas that Karen had a sixth sense that was specialized in her son's sex life.

Again she let her hand travel over his leg, feeling the rough texture of jeans beneath her fingertips. And also this time she got no reaction out of him. A heavy sigh escaped. The heat inside her kept growing, a need deep inside her begging to be fulfilled.

Peyton was attracted to sex like a little chid to cookies. Once you gave her it, she kept asking and asking for it. Once she had tasted it, she could not forget how delicious it was and wanted more and more of it. More often the subject popped up in her head for completely no reason. Getting addicted very slowly.

"Luke?" Her voice came out in a low whisper, barely hiding the fact she was getting overheated.

"What's up Peyton?" He asked, his head turned a bit but holding his main attention on the black board.

"I am bored." She said innocently, placing her hand on his tight, making him look up at her.

"Class is over in less than a half hour." He said, focusing on the teacher again, annoying Peyton. She couldn't have it. She wanted his attention, she needed it, and she would get it.

"I think I could enjoy myself in the main time." Her hand moved smoothly to the inside of his tight, making Lucas gasp.

"Peyton?!" His voice shot out. "What's wrong Lucas?" She asked, her hands circling over his left tight. A blush crept from his neck all over his face when her hand moved closer to his crotch.

"Pey-" Lucas' voice shot out a little harder than expected.

"Mister Scott, is there something you want to share with the class?" The teacher asked, annoyed by being interrupted by something else than a meaningful question.

"No. I am. I –" Peyton didn't even remove her hand making Lucas near to losing it.

"Eeuhm. I am not really feeling well." Lucas mumbled, feeling extremely uncomfortable with all the eyes of his classmates glued on him.

"You look a little red. You might have a fever. Do you want to go the nurse?" Nervously he shook his head.

"It's okay." He mumbled, he wanted to do anything but not stand up since the beginning of something he didn't want to share with the rest of his class.

Peyton grinned wickedly at him, enjoying of her unspoken power. The History lesson moved and so did Peyton's torture. Lucas knew he would have appreciated it very much and liked it when they were in another place, but here with his best friends, his half brother and his ex and several of other people including a teacher wasn't an ideal situation. Even he had to admit that under the first layer from nervousness and anxiousness and being uncomfortable, it felt incredibly good to feel his body fall into excitement. His mother giving him and Peyton no space for their physical relationship irritated Lucas. He knew she did it for all the good reasons but still, he wanted the space for it.

A throaty moan escaped when Peyton found a good rhythm, he couldn't deny that what her hands did felt like heaven. The intimate strokes on his inner tights leaving him at the beginning of his arousal.

Peyton was bad for what she was doing, she knew and he knew it but he couldn't find any reason to stop her on the other side. Even there were probably plenty of reasons, not one flashed before his blue eyes, the only thing that flashed before his eyes was Peyton. His precious Peyton.

The ball rang, class was over and Lucas had a little problem. Peyton only smirked widely, proud of which affect she had managed. Almost all the others had already left the classroom to hurry to their following class, the teacher was wrapping up her stuff, three girls and the two of them remained.

Peyton had already wrapped up her books and pens, looking at how uncomfortable Lucas was moving, she could even feel her smile grow even wider. Eventually he got up, threw his school bag over his shoulder. Peyton couldn't help but let out a straddled moan when she felt Lucas right behind her, her hands in his, leading him. Her smile turned from wide to wicked when she felt the bump she caused press in her back. Oh sweet victory.

All their other classmates had already headed for the next class, they could see them disappear when they walked around the corner. Lucas just stood there, Peyton turned around, assuming he was just hoping and waiting for his little visitor to leave.

But then she saw something … that spark in his blue eyes, naughty and alive. In that flash of a moment, Peyton knew this was going to be an afternoon she would never forget.

Lucas grabbed Peyton by the hands, their lips meeting for an over-stuffed kiss of want and desire. An unheard click of a door opening, tripling footsteps and then a door smacked shut.

Before both of them could even realise were they were in an empty classroom. Too busy to notice, Lucas backed Peyton into the wall, attacking her with feverish want. His tongue demanding access to the sweet depths of warm mouth by almost pushing it past her in cherry lip glossed lips.

"You're bad." Lucas husked against the nape of her neck. "But I guess you knew that already?" He brought out between the teasing, feather light kisses on her skin. In one swift motion he pinned her both arms up above her head, ending all her control on him and taken over, taking the control of their pleasure in his own hands.

His free hand he used to tuck violently on her cloths, his lips attacking her like he would devour her like fresh meat. She couldn't be more turned on, she had always known this 'animal' like desire found house in him. And she had been waiting for to get it out and now she had it, and enjoying it for the full hundred percent.

"How did you dare to do that?" He panted while his hand ran over her side. "Play with me like that?" He pressed himself into her, wanting. Friction and tension building up with every broken breath they took. "Knowing I couldn't react." His fingers went playing with the highest button of her shirt.

She looked hot as fire, Lucas could almost see the steam come off. Probably it was just his wild imagination but she looked breath-taking. She was wearing a boudreaux red blouse with white wings imagines sewn on her back. Totally something for Peyton. She matched the item with a short leather skirt and black pumps. Her hair in perfect curls. Subtle make up for the presentation she had to do for her art class earlier today.

Her green eyes shined wicked, not showing him any regret, driving him wild. In full expectation she liked her lips slowly, turning him on even more. He couldn't take it anymore, her teasing was the droplet, he had to have her.

His actions were feverish when he picked her up, carried her through the classroom and laid her down on the teacher's desk after getting the stuff on it fly out every single direction. But there was no way he could think straight right now, all he cared about was the feeling of his manhood staining painful against his jeans and the beautiful girl in his arms.

Gasping and shivering with burning desire he managed to unbutton Peyton's blouse, revealing her velvet soft skin and a black lacy bra. In the meantime Peyton tried as best as she could to unbutton his black shirt, needing to feel his tanned skin of his torso underneath her fingertips.

She felt another wave of wetness flow through her body when she saw Lucas desperately trying to unbuckle his belt. But unfortunately for him, his fingers betrayed him by trembling. Peyton couldn't help but smirk seeing him helplessly trying.

Her hand met his cheek when she rose up, her green eyes telling him to stop, her other hand travelling southwards, and within seconds the click of his belt was heard.

"Thank you." Lucas panted, blushing even more.

"It was all my pleasure." Peyton whispered back, kissing him softly on the jaw.

Her look stumbling downwards, landing on his pitched boxers, Peyton couldn't help but bite on her lip, waiting what would happen next. Lucas caught her slightly worried look, not too surprised by her daringness falling back into hesitance. Making love for them was still pretty new, and doing that in 'public' was more than brand new also the nervousness it all brought made her mind spin.

With a soft smile he reassured her, guiding her to lie back down again. Hesitantly he began to stroke her cheeks, confidence coming back slowly by seeing her more comfortable again. Then his hands ventured to her breasts, his fingers skating teasingly under the cups of her bra. In just a second the lost degrees where earned back. Feelings his hardness press against her inner tight, her temperature went through the roof, there was no place for holding back anymore.

But Lucas on the other side was not ready to give her what she wanted. Very slowly he began fondle between her legs, earning sweet and little moans from her. Her hips moving up in slight reflex when the sweet fondling became furious rubbing, a delicious friction had build up.

"God Luke!" She pleadingly almost screamed.

"Teasing doesn't feel so good anymore, doesn't it?" He teasingly asked but more stated. She rolled her eyes before rising up quickly, crashing her mouth down on his. They almost lost balance when Peyton was a little too thrilled to get as much skin of him as possible underneath her fingertips.

After letting her hands roam over his muscular chest, her hands dropped down dramatically, dragging the appreciative moans out of him when her hands slipped under the waistband of his boxers.

Lucas broke it off, realising his glory wouldn't last any longer anymore if they didn't stop this.

Softly her back met the wood again, struggling to take even breaths, knowing what would happen next. His big warm hands slipping under her leather skirt, lifting it up. Her breath getting in a swifter pace, in full anticipation, wanting this, no God, needing this.

His long fingers hooking under the black lacy material of her little briefs, pulling it down in one swift motion, yanking them off her slender legs. Not even seconds after exposing her, he pulled his own boxer briefs down.

This was the moment they had been longing for, this was the start of their show.

Lucas brought himself closer to her, his hands finding place under her hips, titling her up a bit. Ready for the big action.

"Lucas." Or maybe not. Peyton clenched her thighs together, Lucas knew directly which direction this was heading too.

"Come on Peyton." He pleaded, desperate for her, being so close to where he wanted to be.

"No Lucas." She shook her head, clenched her tights even firmer together that it even had to hurt, she was ready to come up again.

"It's okay. I'll get it." With his jeans and boxers around his ankles stumbled toward his school bag. Managing to open it swiftly, get out his wallet to get out of a condom.

Returning to her, she got up, taking the package from him. She ripped it open and rolled the condom over his hard manhood very slowly but firmly, making him shiver at her sensual touch. A shuddering breath escaped him.

Peyton had been strict when it came down on birth control. Even she was talking the pill, Lucas needed to wear a condom. Peyton knew he didn't always see the point of it while they were hot and heavy, but two pregnancy scares to his side and the pill still not being a full hundred percent guarantee gave them no other choice.

Lucas reassuringly smiled at her, knowing at this point he but also she got nervous. After all her daringness and needy like behaviour, she still was a doubtful person. Doubting about his real intentions, about if her body was attractive enough, about if she did make him feel good.

Their hands entangled, his blue eyes telling her it was about to happen. Very slowly he entered her while the grip of her hands on his intensified, squeezing away her slight pain and discomfort. Sweetly Lucas kissed her knuckles which made her smile, little tears in the corners of her eyes shined.

Their hands separated again, Lucas hand skating over her smooth skin to find their target between her legs. Teasingly he let his thumb circle over her special spot. A little airy moan escaped, that was his sign. Very carefully withdrew himself almost fully from her to then, push back in deeper. Another moan of satisfaction escaped her, she closed her eyes, enjoying her victory.

"God Luke." She mumbled while his strokes got deeper and faster. "You feel so good." She panted, her hands reaching out for him, wanting, making in chest swell with proud.

Moans and groans competed and won each other over. Desire meeting pleasure, creating pure want. And she suddenly needed his lips upon her, when he was moving so perfectly inside of her, she wanted his lips moving on hers.

Reaching out for him, frustrated with not being able to really touch him while Lucas rode her with blind need, his eyes closed, enjoying every single second.

"Lucas." She heatedly whispered, but he didn't interrupt his actions.

"Luke." She murmured, making him open his hooded eyes.

"Kiss." She brought out between her heavy breaths. He got it, stopped his movements and supported her to sit up, still staying inside her.

Her legs automatically locking around his waist like her arms around his neck. Their mouths meeting in an adoring kiss, lips making flexible movements, tongues dancing.

The rhythm of their hips went slower but their kissing and touching hands surely made up for that. Peyton's hand travelled over his muscular chest downwards, her thumbs stroking over the edges of his hipbones. So slow while their lips kept meeting in short, feverish kisses.

That was before a strong but pleasurable feeling began to suck away the sense in his head. He managed to lay Peyton down without hurting her and then the last strings that bound him to his common sense broke and his common sense turned into animal desire.

Gasping he pounded into her senselessly, not caring for the pain that was caused by his hips that hit the hard material of the desk time after time. His rasping breathing and harsh rhythm matching up, betraying Lucas was on his way to his big peek.

"Baby." He mumbled. "God." He groaned. Broken breaths followed each other quickly, this wouldn't last much longer. Peyton was well aware of that, her hand right hand searching for his. Founding each other between the feverish movements in, entangling them together, like one.

His hips rising into a tempo that is almost unbearable to keep up with. "Peyton." His hips stop abruptly, with an incredible force expressed in deep thrusts and a strong squeeze in her hand. It shook Peyton, to feel him inside him with so much energy, all for her. Then his body went totally limp, his blue eyes flutter close. Softly she made soothing noises towards him.

Recovery lasted just a minute before Lucas was aware of the uncomfortable movements of his girlfriend. His eyes widening again, taking her in with all her glory. She looked so breathtaking in this strange way. The sight of her, with the tight black skirt shoved over her bare hips, her bordeaux blouse fully unbuttoned expect for the two lowest buttons, her breasts with peaked nipples trapped in a skimpy lacy bra, her curls into mess and that screaming look in her green eyes messaging him: Touch me!

Lucas was pretty sure he would have come again by this picture of her if he hadn't just a minute ago. And touch her, he definitely would, her pray would be answered, and how!

Slowly he pulled himself out of her, escaping her squeezing walls with regret. Well aware she was still in her plateau-phase, and he was going to use that fully.

His arms recovered strength as he pulled her to a sitting position again. His head finding a place on her shoulder, his warm mouth travelling lower to her collarbone. Very teasingly he began to nipple on the skin, earning appreciative moans of her.

"Luke." She moaned softly, feeling his mouth pressure her skin almost painfully. This sure would leave a hickey, but she didn't care. With his lips still focused on her delicate skin he let his hand drop little by little. His fingertips travelled over the soft material of her blouse to end up between her legs.

A strangled gasp escaped but God she wanted this. Frustrated because he didn't move fast enough she instinctively rocked her hips against his hand. Lucas lifted his head away from her skin, his eyes met her, getting this playful look again. The intake of her breath was broken by Lucas' finger slipping inside of her warm heat. He held still, feeling her head fall on his shoulder, her breathing nothing more than a series of struggling pants. The undeniable proof of her arousal.

Very carefully, well aware of how sensitive her body was right now he began to move his finger inside of her. Her eyes fluttered close, her lips on his neck, try to kiss away the moans she made, caused by the delicious feeling of his rhythm. Still careful but more secure he slipped a second finger inside of her tight and welcoming heat. Peyton sucked in a breath and from kisses her lips went to lightly biting on her lovers' skin.

The tempo of his movements was adjusted to her rhythm of her hips. Every time she jerked her hips up to him, he let his fingers slip in deep, earning sexy little sounds from her. It didn't take long before Peyton's hips began to rise and fall faster and faster, obligating Lucas to follow her lead instead of his own.

The feeling of that build inside of Peyton was almost unbearable. She was balancing on the edge of her orgasm but she needed something more, that little push so she could fall into the satisfaction her body was longing for. And Lucas could give it to her, so easily, but she knew he wasn't giving in. He was doing this just to make her beg for it. He was just getting back at her for her little 'fun' idea during History class.

Groaning she pushed her hips closer to Lucas, her lips and teeth making Lucas' skin bruise and break to make sure her moans, groans and squeals would not draw attention from someone in the hallway.

"Lucas." She let her voice escape from her lips, her mouth just a centimetre away from his skin, her hot breath ghosting over his aching skin. His movements went a bit slower. "Lucas please." She begged, lifting her head fully of his shoulder, trying to look into his eyes.

"Luke." She brought out difficult, the walls of her throat seemed to be glued to each other, hindering her ability to breathe or talk properly. "I-" Escaped her. "Lucas, I need…" She fought out, a squeal was about to echo through the classroom when suddenly Lucas stopped his moving. Instead of the squeal, a disappointed and confused groan. She was about to attack him with complaining words and evil looks when she noticed the naughty blue waves crashing through his eyes.

"What do you need?" He asked, his fingers moving slightly out again, giving her the feeling he was about the exit her. She tried to speak but her gasps didn't give her a chance. His fingers were nearly out.

"I need you to make me come!" She hissed frustrated.

"Ooh, that's what you want." He said grinning and he forcefully plunged his finger in again.

"God." She groaned, clinching onto him, her nails digging into his flesh. His thumb lightly brushing against her clit, making her cry out. God she needed this.

Lucas found another pace that seemed more satisfying for her. Between slow and fast but more leaning to fast, his thumb stroking over her clit every time she moved her hips up. Furiously she rocked her hips up when she neared her orgasm.

"Lucas." She kept repeating his name feverish. And suddenly she gasped. "Now." He added a third finger and hit her right on the spot.

He swallowed her loud scream with his lips just in time. Waves of wetness followed her rhythmic beats. She saw the stars before her eyes go blue, Lucas' blue.

Feeling her body going limp he began to soothingly rub her back while she gasped for some descent oxygen to full her lungs and recover her sweat-bathed body.

After a several minutes she had recovered enough to get herself properly dressed again but Lucas didn't let her. He grabbed her hand that tried to button up her blouse. Instead of letting her, he placed his hand on her shoulders, leading her back down, his eyes fixed on the buttons.

Misleading her, 'cause when she lay down, his hands grabbed her legs and he buried his face against her core, dragging a surprised gasp from her lips. Tenderly he began to lick up her juices. His tongue working her tired body up again, sucking on her moist centre.

She bumped her hips up, trying to get his mouth harder on her. She was wishing for his tongue to jump into action. Lucas became aware of her frantic moves. Sure he knew what she liked. Teasingly he poked out her tongue, moving it from her clit to her entrance. He softly hummed against it, making Peyton writhe on the desk. Then he finally did for what she was praying, his tongue slipping in the source of her wetness. The thought that he was practically 'tonguing' her downstairs made her horny as hell again. She was about to moan out her approval when suddenly he stopped. She was kind of shocked to found him pull up his boxers and pants. He buckled his belt and button up his shirt again, and than he shot her a hurried look.

With much regret and frustrated she began to button her own blouse up again. She jumped of the desk and pulled her skirt over her hips again. She found her panties beside the desk and quickly putted them on again while Lucas picked up some of the stuff that had fallen from the desk in their hurry.

She picked up her schoolbag again, following his example and when she was about to reach for the door handle when she suddenly felt herself backed into the nearby wall. Her back met the world map on the wall and his face was only a centimetre away from him.

"Are you going to be a good girl now?" He asked stern, his full lips inching closer. And suddenly she knew why he had left her on this certain level of arousal. It was nothing more than mere punishment. Mocking she looked away, not giving into him.

"Are you going to be a good girl now?" He repeated, his breath unbearably hot on her damp skin. She looked at him and she suddenly saw his eyes soften. She could do nothing other than give in.

"I'll be a good girl." She promised and he pecked on her lips. Lucas opened the door, trying to slip out the classroom without attention that would be drawn tot hem. Lucky for them everyone was following classes and the hallways were empty. Actually the classes would end in less than a quarter.

Inwardly they both cursed and hurried off to the class they were supposed to be. Standing before the door, they tried to think of a reasonable explanation. Thinking she was to whisper something rational in his ear he was surprised by her words.

"I'll be good if you be bad." She knocked and opened the door of the classroom.

All the eyes of the students falling upon them and the ones of the teacher were the most curious and annoyed.

"Mister Scott and Miss Sawyer, I feel incredibly honoured you are able to follow my class." The lady before them glanced on her watch. "After being more than fourthly minutes late." Followed annoyed. "Explanation please?"

Lucas felt his throat close off. He had never done anything like this before and didn't like the idea of lying to his teacher. But since Peyton didn't make a first move … But then she did.

"We sat on the courtyard. Lucas didn't feel well. But he's okay now." Peyton added when she saw the panicked face of her teacher. All the teachers had been informed about Lucas' heart condition and they were very concerned about the health of one of their better students. "Okay." She said joined by a simple not towards the two free desks at the side of the classroom. "Are you sure you feel okay?" The teacher asked towards Lucas. "I feel fine. Thank you Miss." He answered before falling into his chair.

Before they even were installed properly, the signal of the bell echoed through the classroom to let know class was over. Everyone tried to get outside as fast as possible, wanting to enjoy the little free time before their last class of the day would start. But Lucas and Peyton went outside after everyone, their hands intertwined, joyful and secret smiles dancing on their lips. A warm feeling overflowed them.

Hand in hand they walked towards their blue lockers, happy with their last names following each other pretty fast in the alphabet. Quickly Peyton took her biology book out of the locker before stepping to Lucas who was still busy with taking it.

Softly she rested her head against his back, loving the feel of the soft material of shirt against her smooth skin. Contently she took deep breaths, his scent was soothing and … turning her on.

She had tried to avoid the state of her body for the past quarter but with no avail in the end. His shirt tightened around his torso when Peyton balled her hands in it, making Lucas smirk by his 'victory'. He laid his big hands on hers, looking over his shoulder to see her looking upwards to him. Their smiles colliding, Peyton balancing herself on her toes, ready for a sweet caress from lips on lips. He was only a simple breath away from her but then the ball rang. Slightly disappointment rushed over her and also him but seeing their friends and classmates pass them by, they knew there was no time for a second escape.

Tightening the grip on each others hands they walked back to the classroom with the others. It was like they moved in another universe. Like they were as light as feathers, they seemed to fly instead of walking. That everything was warm and bright.

"Attention please." An older voice rose up, a slight familiar voice. The voice of their biology teacher. Swiftly they joined their other classmates. "Another class needs the science classroom so there's a switch." Lucas and Peyton just smiled at each other and followed the teacher and the others. But the smile was washed from their faces when they found out which classroom they had headed to. A classroom they had only seen less than a half hour ago.

Lucas could feel himself turning red again, and so did Peyton. Quickly they took place behind the desks, trying not relive the imagine of what they did here not even a descent hour ago. They both managed to suppress the feelings and thoughts, they already had a hard time with it since the teacher was complaining about the teacher's desk being messy and certain things being absent.

"Well here it is." The teacher said, walking away from the front desk to end up by the central heating at the window's sight. She picked up a few ballpoints pens and then she turned from normal to pale to red.

She was shivering in rage, a used condom between her fingers. Before she even could say anything the whole class howling with laughter except from two people, a blond boy and a blonde girl.

"At least they were practicing biology in a save way." Nathan let himself escape which caused Peyton to burst out into coughing. Making all the attention land on her, which was already very unwanted. Helplessly her green eyes shot to Lucas who had turned deeply red.

And there it began a sermon with the duration of whole class about sexual behaviour of teenagers in public places. Or just about teenagers and society today. About how they behaved like the world was their without any respect for others feelings, viewpoints and the whole thing.

All the students were incredibly happy when the bell signal echoed through the hallways with the message school was over for today.

The most relieved ones where Lucas and Peyton who hurried to their lockers. They finally thought that this hell was over and they could go home and the uncomfortable and embarrassed feeling would fade. And they could only focus on the 'good ones'. It was the best plan ever, excluded Haley.

"Can you believe that?" She screamed out when she appeared them, Nathan just behind her. "Which unbelievable morons and unmannered people would have had sex in one of our classrooms?" She strengthened her point by places her hands forcefully on her petit waist.

"Can I borrow your scarf Peyton?" Lucas chocked out uncomfortable, his hand pointing to the white fabric, his other hand rubbing on the suspicious red spot on his neck.

"Why would you borrow her scarf?" Haley asked and Nathan burst out into hysterical laughter. "What are you laughing about?" She asked serious on her husband. And than she saw it, the bruised skin on her best male friend's neck.

"I think you find your unmannered morons." Nathan brought out. And both Lucas and Peyton wish the earth would split open and swallow them both …


	30. Her Undeveloped Story Is The New Sad

_**A/N: Hey hey. The new chapter. I know it doesn't have much Leyton but I wanted to write this chapter since it deals with a fact that in the show kind of was 'matter of factly' described, and I thought I deserved more attention and I got the chance to deepen myself into Lucas. Probably I have another chapter for you on Sunday, it's almost finished (I would finish it today, that was until the noisy jerks that call themselves 'my brother's friend' came here and made the last string that held me upon my inspiration snap, the selfish bastards) So, I hope you'll like it. I hope when I open my mail box tomorrow evening I can dance because of your sweet reviews. (I'll need it since school starts tomorrow, crap, but OTH starts also again, and let's pray for Leyton...) Thanks for reading already! **_

**Her Undeveloped Story is The New Sad**

Peyton was walking through the hallways of the Roe/Scott residence when suddenly she felt lower tummy tighten painfully and she knew what that meant. With much regret, she knew her period would be there in less than two days, but judging on the intensely of the tension, it would be probably tomorrow.

She cursed herself when she walked around the corner when she realised that shehad run out of menstrual pads and tampons. Practically living with Lucas and Karen all the time had a lot of bonuses; she didn't need to get up alone anymore, she had a ride, she didn't have to cook, she had a 'tutor' on hand, she could spend as many time with her boyfriend as she wanted … but there were a few disadvantages. With Karen going to the shops and Peyton always forgetting to tell her what she needed was one of them. She was getting too used to the comfort of dependence.

She thought she never would after living alone for so many years. Being forced to be independent at a young age had left its traces. She never knew what it was like to have someone doing all those things for you, your laundry or cooking or cleaning the house. All the things that teenagers took for granted and she never had. But after all she didn't blame her dad anymore; she knew he did what was right. She didn't blame anyone, it hadn't been easy, the loneliness, the sorrow, the feeling of failure and shortcoming. But now it was finally fading bit by bit, the love she received from Lucas and the feeling of realizing Karen cared so much about her, those feelings cured all what she had been going through.

If there was a way to thank Karen enough, Peyton would do anything, but Karen was a person who was simply thankful she had to change to care, she didn't need the triumph of appreciation poured over her. No, she was probably more thankful to Peyton than the other way around. The young girl loved Lucas with the whole of her heart and that was more than the mother could have ever hoped for.

After a quick round through the house and Karen nowhere in sight, there was only one room that was left unchecked, the elder woman's bedroom.

Peyton walked through hallway, knowing Karen would help her out with her 'little issue'. The wooden door wasn't fully closed so Peyton entered without thinking. She assumed since the door wasn't closed, she wouldn't be interrupting anything.

Shock was like an ice cube running over the bare skin of her back when Peyton saw the mother of her boyfriend standing before the mirror, staring at her exposed belly. Her naked belly that certainly showed a bump. A baby bump.

After a frightening moment of silence, Peyton's voice coated the room with her voice.

"Are you pregnant?" Peyton blurted out, so blown away that she didn't realise how stupid her question actually sounded.

"Shut the door!" Karen brought out between two breaths. But Peyton remained motionless.

"Peyton!" The brunette hissed as she jerked down her loose shirt. The urgent tone in the panicked voice seemed to snap the blonde back to reality and made her do what was asked of her.

The door locked and again Peyton found herself frozen, not able to move. Something about the look in the older woman's eyes made the atmosphere change. Or maybe it was something about the look in her own eyes, the realisation that she now saw the mother of her boyfriend in a different light.

"Where's Lucas?" The whispered voice shot out, her hands forced into this painful looking grip.

"He's outside in the garden." Peyton answered, feeling uneasy with the extremely anxious look in Karen's eyes. The answer decreased the amount of faintheartedness, but only a little. There was something in the look of the older woman's eyes, an extreme form of anxiety that was almost one with the colour of her eyes. The feeling the sad gaze could give you was haunting. It had appeared when she heard the news of Keith's death and since, had never gone away again. It would not disappear because she would never feel as safe again, never feel so loved again, never feel as home again than the day she had spend with Keith in the knowing they loved each other.

Peyton felt like she had a déjà-vu when Karen's hand protectively rubbed over her belly, only the young blonde couldn't exactly place it. She wasn't given the time to place it when she heard Karen's breathing growing irregular.

"Is it Keith's?" Peyton wished for once she could have had her big mouth shut, not only because the tears that had been on the verge of Karen's eyes were now spilling, also because of the stupidity of her being. How could she just have asked a woman who had been engaged and at the edge of marriage someone, that the baby she was carrying wasn't the one from her fiancé?

"I am so sorry. Of course it's Keith's baby." Peyton said while moving closer to Karen, her hand touched the older woman's shoulder to show her comfort but was abruptly by Karen's words:

"It hurts." She sobbed.

"Should I call a doctor?" Peyton voice shot up in panic when she saw the frame of the woman beside her nearly crumble.

"No." She sobbed again. "It just hurts." And her hand met her chest with a bang. "It just hurts so much."

Peyton found herself helpless at the sight of the woman before her. The blonde was trying to get this, it, everything. To progress this unexpected situation, the pregnancy of her ever to be mother in law.

Shakily Peyton brought her hand back to Karen's shoulder whom was now looking sickly pale.

"Maybe you should lie down." She whispered. Without any form of protest, Karen did what was suggested and let Peyton help her to make her comfortable.

Karen's unsteady breathing seemed to recover back to normal and the blood seemed to have rushed back to her face, but it was only an illusion. Because when her hand travelled from the comforter to her belly, her breathing crashed into irregularity and the blood had left again in the blink of an eye. The sobs went from non-existence to all over the place and the bitter tears slowly soaked the soft pillow that rested underneath her think brown hair.

Peyton found herself helpless once again. Maybe she should go get Lucas, but then she remembered the horrified look in the older woman's eyes when she had asked where her son was. Peyton's intuition told her that Karen didn't want her son in here right now. And that same intuition took over when the young blonde took the older brunette into her arms, pulled the crying face into her chest and her slender hands soothingly rubbed her back.

Vague words of Anna Sawyer circulated in Peyton's mind. "There is no better intuition than the one of a mother. No harm can be done with it, all damaged can be repaired." How ironic, Peyton thought. After having read 'Flowers in the Attic' by V.C. Andrews, Peyton had been convinced that mother intuition was only something for the happy ones. Or rather said, it was an illusion. If fate turns against you, there is nothing like it anymore. Only the realisation it never existed and all you thought it was has just been another lie.

But that was until this moment. The puzzle of Anna Sawyer, Elizabeth Harp and Karen Roe, knowledge, hurt and unexpectedness fitted together. Mother's intuition was a part of her, it was no illusion. It was a feeling you chose for or else abounded. It a part of every girl's being, she gives a life and embraces it or otherwise kills it silence.

Just like with Lucas, Peyton and Karen didn't need words to comfort each other. Knowing the other was there was just enough.

After some time the brunette finally seemed to calm down. Quickly she fixed herself and got up from the bed. She was preparing to go one like nothing had happened, but Peyton saw it and she was not going to let it happen.

"Shouldn't you talk about this?" But no reaction followed. Karen had fallen into being distant, like she had been towards Lucas after the shooting. Her eyes were cold, her body tense, and her mind going like a car at full speed.

Her fingers embraced the handle of the door when words soaked in Peyton's voice flew through the room and they felt like a stabbing knife into her back.

"Does Lucas know you're expecting Keith's child?"

And in just the blink of an eye, Karen's frame was shuddering again, her forehead resting against the door, heartbreaking cries escaping her.

Half-prepared to her reaction, Peyton walked up to her and took her hands to guide her back to the bed. Once Karen sat down again, Peyton went sitting next to her. Before she could even say anything, the brunette's tear-soaked words crashed upon her.

"I am not supposed to be this way." Carefully Peyton manoeuvred an arm around her shoulder. "This isn't supposed to be this way." Peyton's fingers stroked her shoulder.

"I know." Peyton softly said. Nothing like this was supposed to be the way this turned out. The young girl held the older woman even closer.

"I remember Lucas asked me when he was just a little boy why Keith wasn't his father. Why he didn't have a little brother or sister." A sob painfully interrupted her speaking for a second. "Why he wasn't like any other kid in school. What he had done wrong to be put aside by the world? Why he didn't get the change to be what he wanted?"

Fake silence came back, and sobs pounced against the wall and back.

"I wasn't able to give him the answers when he stood there, looking at me with those big, blue, disappointed eyes. What could I say to him to explain what he had done wrong when there wasn't anything he had done? Why everything happened. I never have been able to give him the right answers. I will never be able to give him thosse answers." She sniffed. "He was so heartbroken back than. I heard him swear that night that he would find the answers to his questions, even it would be the last thing he'd do." Tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Inside he is still that little boy. Horrified, insecure and fighting against the feeling he is unloved, desperately trying to forget every bad word they spoke to him because of what he was the result of. The little boy who would find the answers to 'Why?' to be able to understand everything in this world." Her palms roughly rubbed over her cheeks.

"But he isn't going to understand it." She said, desperation in her voice.

"He will. It's Lucas." Peyton said, trying to let a little spark grow into a fire of hope.

"He won't, Peyton. He isn't going to be able to place this. You don't know him."

Peyton was shocked. She knew him, she knew that boy like herself; she knew Lucas Scott better than she knew herself.

"But..."

"Nothing 'but' Peyton. You know him, but not like I do. You don't know that little boy inside of him. That little kid he used to be with all those questions. He might be seventeen now and he might give you the impression he can do it all. That he is your hero. And he is. I am not taking that away from you Peyton." She said when she saw the hurt look on the blonde's face. "But deep inside, he is still that little boy fighting against 'why?' Deep inside, he has never been able to place and process any of it. He'll never be able to place his life. And I am afraid, by telling him that I am expecting his uncle's baby. The baby of the man who was the only father he knew. That little child is going to come to the surface again and everything you know from him now will be destroyed."

Silence began to build.

"This stability he has developed through the years. I am afraid I that part of his being will be damaged when I tell him this."

And now silence was really building up, into painful and true stages.

"But still Karen, so many things happened that could do that." Peyton said softly. "Like Keith's death." She added on a tone Karen could barely hear her.

It looked like Karen was going to cry again, but she choose the road beside her tears and found a reason to speak without breaking down.

"All those major things that have already happened are things he had a sort of control over, or they were things that people he knew made the choice. Keith's death was-" A painful sob escaped. "It was Jimmy's choice. Lucas could place that after all."

The brunette preferred the silence for a while, or at least what you could call silence when sobs and painful, uneven breathing are a part of that 'silence'.

"But this. This isn't what Keith and I choose. This definitely wasn't planned. We didn't even dream of this. And Peyton." She continued when she saw the look on the face of her son's girlfriend. "You know better than anyone what's it like it get lost into a moment of passion." She added on a different tone, a more intense tone.

The blonde's face quickly transformed into a guilty look. She had experienced it more than once. She had caused problems with it, more than once. It had been the reason why her life got so messed up sometimes, so it had happened definitely more than once.

"But you are going to have to tell him." Peyton interrupted the thoughts of the older woman.

"I know, I know." She murmured. "But it isn't this easy. It isn't like: 'Hey Lucas, I am pregnant with the child of the uncle you loved like a father and now is laying underneath the ground'."

And again, silence hit, left them both speechless, or just silent.

"You're right." Peyton sadly whispered. "But you can't keep hiding this." Karen nodded sadly. "When had you planned on telling him?" She asked carefully, hoping the older brunette wouldn't start crying again, it broke her heart.

"I don't know." She wailed, her hands covering her suddenly tired face.

"Maybe I can help you." Peyton offered. "I can be there when you tell. Help you if you need it."

Karen was about to answer something when an unexpected voice howled through the house.

"Mom?! Peyton?!" Lucas' voice slipped through the cracks of the house.

This conversation wasn't over, both women knew, it just ended for right now. A look into Karen's gentle eyes and Peyton knew this was an unspoken agreement. No word about this would be told to anyone, especially not Lucas. His mother would tell him, if she found the right time to do it. She would do it with her to-be daughter-in-law by her side.

"Where are you?" He yelled as his footsteps neared the room.

With a little push of Karen towards the door, Peyton opened it to find her boyfriend standing in the hallway.

"Hi." She spoke as she appeared in the doorway and quickly walked a few steps toward him.

"There you are." He smiled and threw his arms around her, pressing her against his sweat-soaked shirt.

"Yuck." Peyton said when she felt the sweat against her skin. Lucas let go of her and smiled.

"Were you two having some girl talk?" Lucas asked when he spotted his mother.

Peyton knew she had to save this situation, she knew Karen wouldn't be able to say something without crashing into tears.

"I just needed some 'woman-stuff' and the shops are closed already." Peyton said and shrugged her shoulders, lucky for both women he bought it and he longed too much for a shower to wash the dirt away from working in the garden.

"I am starving. Can you fix something while I shower?" Lucas said as he took off his shirt, letting his bare torso exposed for everyone who wanted to admire it. Peyton would have done that, would have tried to get into the shower with him if she wasn't so worried about Karen.

"Off course I can, son." Karen said and took off to the kitchen, Peyton followed and Lucas stumbled to the bathroom while undressing.

Karen had decided to prepare spaghetti Bolognese for dinner tonight. Every night Peyton helped the older woman, even she wasn't a real kitchen princess, but she had already learned a lot from the older woman.

It was weird, Peyton thought, she had lived by herself for so long and she couldn't cook decently. But now she was spoiled with delicious food, and she couldn't stand the thought anymore of the crap she used to shove down her throat.

But this evening she wasn't really helping. She was going on an awful slow pace with her work while Karen was doing hers like a time bomb was ticking.

"When are you going to tell him?" Peyton asked while she was cutting the vegetables.

"Soon." Karen assured her.

"When is 'soon' exactly?" Peyton fired back on a heated whisper tone.

"I don't know. Tomorrow. Maybe in a few days."

Peyton was about to whisper anything back when she suddenly heard Lucas' voice crack up. A shock went through her body and the sharp knife she has been cutting the vegetables with ended up in her finger.

"Au!" (what's au, just out of curiousity?) Peyton cried and immediately brought her hurt finger to her mouth. The blood tickled from her index finger to her hand.

"Bring her to bathroom. Nurse it." Karen commanded to Lucas and he led Peyton to the bathroom.

Gentle, the word that described Lucas Eugene Scott the best. There was no better way to describe his actions when he nursed her hurt finger. The cut extended over the whole tip of her finger and was pretty deep. It wouldn't stop bleeding at first. When it did, Lucas made sure the wound was clean and the little plaster was placed carefully over the cut.

She didn't even feel the sharp pain. Her mind was too busy with trying to place the conversation with Karen. Lucas noticed her absentminded behaviour and was about to mention it when his mother called them for dinner.

Dinner was different, it was quiet. Not silent because Lucas talked about the work he had done in the garden and outside the house. It was just the fact that Karen and Peyton both seemed to be drowned in their own world.

Lucas thought Peyton was just tired and in the case of his mother, she had been distracted often during the last weeks.

But Peyton wasn't tired, he noticed when she laid down on his bed, staring at the ceiling with her hazel eyes wide open.

He crawled onto his bed to lie down next to her and left his laptop where it was.

"Does your finger still hurt?" He asked sweetly, taking her hand into his, but she barely noticed.

"Peyton?" No response.

Carefully he took the hurt finger and brought it to his mouth and began to suck sensually on it. Then he took a second one and sucked harder. Finally he gained some response.

"What are you doing?" Was not what he expected, he had expected for her to lay all over him and beg to make love like she would have done otherwise.

He opened his mouth and immediately shut it again. And silence fell back into place.

After another ten minutes, Lucas decided to say something.

"Peyton?"

"Yeah?" She murmured. "What's the matter Luke?"

"You kind of look occupied." He said softly.

"I am just tired. Let's go to sleep." She said, crawling under his comforter, and Lucas soon followed.

They would always cuddle a bit before Lucas would crawl into the airbed, before Karen would make a scene when she entered. She knew her son's and girlfriend's habit and checked them a few times before going to sleep herself. If they would try something else than just cuddle and kiss, she would probably know. If they would cross the line of innocence, they both weren't quiet. Karen had noticed when they had tried to hide the fact they were doing 'forbidden' things in her home.

Lucas was loosing his grip on her and was about crawl into his airbed when Peyton's voice weakly rose up.

"Hold me a little longer." She begged.

He was caught of guard by her sudden tone but decided to give in. At the moment he didn't care his mom would walk in and make a scene that they should be sleeping, and preferably separated. His girlfriend sounded like she needed him, and it was his task as boyfriend to be there when that happened. Even though he knew there was something on her mind, he decided to not bring it up now. He just held her, trying to soothe her.

Peyton on the other side didn't feel very soothed. Her ear lay on his chest and she listened to the steady and strong rhythm of heart that for some sort of reason occasionally seemed to skip a beat. She wondered if it reflected his person. He always was her saviour. He was there, leading his life in a way it looked steady to the outside world. He was stronger than a boy his age used to be. Of course, there were times he was down, but it didn't take him long to repair himself into what he needed to be.

But she wondered what he would do when a part of that would be taken away. If suddenly more than one beat would be missing, when his rhythm would be screwed up?

_Would he fall?_

_Would he crumble?_

_Would he fight?_

_Would he try to understand what was happening, even when there wasn't a reason available? _

_Would he want to get back onto track?_

Lucas' heartbeat slowed down and suddenly … his heart seemed to skip two beats.

_Would he be her Lucas anymore__? _


	31. Be Careful With Words

**Be C****areful With Words, He's Still a Little Boy**

Sunday afternoons at the Roe/Scott household were almost always lazy.

It was doing whatever you liked, whatever you felt uncomfortable with, just being yourself.

Normally Lucas and Peyton would have been at her house like any other weekend but Peyton had insisted to stay here. Lucas assumed she rather stayed here because once they entered the Sawyer residence, sexual tension was all over the place and it would lead to nothing because of her period. For once Peyton thanked the awful thing for its timing so she could stay by Karen's side without needing to give a reason to Lucas.

So now they were enjoying their lazy Sunday afternoons in the living room of the Roe/Scott house.

For Lucas it meant relaxing on the couch with a copy of 'The Sound and the Fury' by William Faulkner. A notebook and a pen in the reach of his hand to note some interesting things down.

For Peyton it meant lying on that same couch with her head in his lap, reading a magazine. Focusing on the reviews of the latest CD's. But how hard she tried to focus, how many times the same words flew before her eyes, the meaning didn't join them. The curly blonde was extremely distracted by the nervous movements of her boyfriend's mother who folding the laundry. After yesterday when Karen's secret was shared with Peyton, her anxious behaviour was outing in stress which could in no ways be good for the baby.

The movements of the woman's hand were shaky and fast. Too fast to do it properly at least. Every piece of clothing she had to do twice because the first one didn't satisfy her.

Peyton couldn't take it anymore when the brunette started over three times to fold her bordeaux blouse where she had sexy memories on.

In a few seconds Peyton was up, the magazine tossed to the coffee table and walking to the older woman.

"Let me help you." She said softly while taking the garment in her own hands. For another five minutes both ladies folding the laundry only six or seven garments were left over. Peyton bended down to pick up one of Lucas' shirts in the laundry basket when she noticed how Karen's hands gripped on the table and her knuckles turned white.

"I am thirsty. Do you want a glass of water?" Peyton directed her question towards Karen. She needed to do something before Karen would faint.

"Do you want anything Luke?" Peyton asked, hoping she could hide the nervousness and slight panic her voice. And he didn't notice when he mumbled 'water' as answer. The boy was just too deep into the book he was reading.

Peyton grasped the brunette's hand and pulled her into the kitchen. Karen didn't even try to fight back.

"Are you okay?" Peyton asked after handing her a glass of water.

"I am fine." The brunette answered automatically.

"No you're not." Peyton said, placing her glass on the sink even harder than she had intended. The older woman was about to defend herself but the young blonde cut her off before she even could begin.

"You look sick. You're shaking. You walk around like there's glass under your feet or something might jump around the corner."

Karen looked caught off guard but knew the words of her son's girlfriend where her truth.

"You're not fine."

Silence interrupted their conversation for a minute before Peyton decided to speak.

"You'll have to tell Lucas." She simply said and within in second Karen was ready to defend herself and convince Peyton that it wasn't the best way, against better knowing in.

"It's too soon." Karen said, her finger had a painful grip on her tumbler.

"Too soon for you or for Lucas?" That question made an insulted expression on Karen's face appear. She was about to give the young girl an answer she wouldn't ever forget but again the blonde was too swift.

"I don't know much about pregnancies but one thing I know that stress isn't good for the baby. And at this moment you'd be awfully lying to yourself when you would say you are not stressed out."

Karen was defeated by Peyton. She should think about the baby boy or girl in her belly first. She should think about what was the best for the little wonder inside of her, not what was the best for her. Pregnancy is about being unselfish, putting yourself on the second place, living the best way you can because the other can't and depends on you.

"Just take a deep breath and than we are going to tell him. Okay?" Peyton said, knowing Karen wouldn't take action herself. She took hold of the elder woman's hand, leading her back to the living room where Lucas still was deepened in his book.

"Luke." Peyton said after letting his mother's hand go. "Lucas." No reaction came from his side. His blue eyes were glued upon the pages full of words.

But Peyton knew she would get him distracted pretty soon. She crawled onto the couch, placing her legs on either side of his.

"Luke." Her hands fell on his book while her lips captured his. And within a second the book was forgotten and the only thing that filled his mind was how soft her lips felt against his. Swiftly his hands flew out to cup her cheeks to deepen their kiss. His tongue ran along her lower lip but she backed away.

"What?" He whispered, looking at her with the same intense gaze as he had looked at his book.

"Your mom wants to tell you something." She whispered back, trying to hide the string of panic in her voice. Lucas' gaze transferred from Peyton's pretty face to the worried face of his mother who was standing only a few metres away from them.

Quickly she sat down on the couch. Her hands clenched on each other in a way it had to hurt. Instead of leaning back into the couch and make herself comfortable she was all stiff and tense, her back straight.

Also Peyton failed to relax. Lucas noticed it and pulled his girl against his warm body. Her head fell against his broad shoulder and his arms lay around her waist, his fingers playing with the hem of her shirt. She succeeded to relax her body but the pressure in her chest only increased when the silence build further.

"What's up mom?" Lucas asked himself when his mother didn't seem to feel like talking or explaining why they all sat down here on a Sunday afternoon.

"Well." She began. In her head she was picking the right words for the sentences to explain her teenage son he would get a little sister or little brother in a few months. She had to be extremely careful with the words she decided to use to tell him about the current situation. She had to pick her words very carefully because the words she would use could make difference on the impact it would have. As mother it was her task to not upset him, and it was her main task when she knew that inside, he still was a little boy.

"A few months back." She continued. "Back when I was with Keith." She managed to say without sobbing for the first time in a very long time. A part of her grief seemed to be placed and progressed already.

"When we were together." She gasped for some new oxygen. Memories of her and Keith came flying back. Maybe her grief wasn't that placed and progressed than she had assumed a few moments before.

Lucas was getting uncomfortable by his mother's sudden confusing behaviour. His gaze stumbled upon her hands that were involved into a painful grasp. This wasn't something for Karen Roe to do. He knew that.

"You know. Keith and I-" The somehow embarrassing words were stuck in her throat. It was a lot easier to talk about sex when it involved Lucas' activities instead of her own. "We have been intimate."

Lucas nodded already slightly suspicious. Why on earth would she begin about that?

"And-and. It resulted something." Karen brought out. "And-and." Lucas blue eyes grew suspicious and Peyton saw the storm was about to begin.

"What your mom is trying to say is that you are getting a br-" Karen interrupted and finished for Peyton. "You are getting a little brother or sister."

The storm began. The threatening silence while the bunch of live changing words sunk into the teenager's mind. And than the first lighten ruined the sky.

"How long have you known?" His blue eyes were so dark from the storm inside him that not one of the women knew at which one is question was directed. But Karen decided to take the lead onto this one.

"A few weeks." Her son's eyes darkened even more. Karen felt like her son was daring her to say more. "The week before Nathan and Haley's second wedding." She brought out nearly breathless by the pressure of his eyes.

"And you didn't bother to tell me?" The second lightening flashed.

"I didn't know how Lucas." She tried to defence herself. "I didn't know how you would react." She tried to protect herself from his damaging eyes. "I didn't know-"

"Why?" The first growl of thunder. Lucas shot off the couch, leaving Peyton for what she was.

And suddenly there was silence. A silence between three people preparing for the worst.

"Why mom? Why now?!" His voice was even worse than the thunder. "Why?!" He demanded.

"I don't know." Karen said, on the verge of her tears.

"I want to know 'why'?!" He was not going to give it up.

"I wish I knew Lucas." She said while the first tears began to spill over her cheeks.

Cautiously Peyton got up and walked over to Karen who was now shaking on her legs.

"Why now mom? Why not years earlier? Why does this happen now?" His thundering grew from heavy and ear-spitting to desperate growls.

"I said I don't know Lucas." Karen brought out at the best her sobs would let her. But it wasn't an answer which satisfied Lucas.

"Why did you let this happen? Why?" Lucas' voice sounded suddenly high, fighting to get out of his mouth.

"Do you think I planned this?!" Karen screamed in disbelief. How could the son she had raised for almost eighteen years now, how could he believe this was planned? Hadn't she raised him better?

Lucas turned his back towards both women.

"Unbelievable." He mumbled while shaking his head and stamped out of the living room.

"Lucas Eugene Scott!" Karen cried but it didn't stop him from slamming to front door shut with such a force that the house seemed to shake.

Peyton was torn between the crying Karen on her side and going after Lucas who seemed at least as upset as his mother, if it wasn't even worse. Definitely it was worse. Peyton had never seen him this angry, this betrayed, this upset, this lost. Not even after Keith's dead.

This was deeper, this was like a part of Lucas Scott she hadn't seen before. And the words Karen had spoken yesterday began to fly around in her head. But she didn't give them the time to hit, she just let them swirl in her mind.

"Karen?" Peyton softly spoke to the sobbing woman. "Why don't you go lie down on the bed and try to relax. I'll go after Lucas." But the blonde girl gained no response of the older woman, the brunette seemed to be frozen on the spot.

"Karen?" Peyton placed her hand and the other's woman back. And suddenly Karen seemed to snap back into reality.

"W-what?" She stammered.

"You should lie down. Do I need to call Haley or-" Peyton was soon cut off again by the other woman.

"No I am fine." She waved with her hands, she waved the issue away from her.

"You don't look fine." Peyton answered back, her eyes had a hard time to tear away from the sickly pale, shaking woman in front of her. But it was already too late now, she had already grown distant and it didn't look like she would open up anytime soon.

Peyton sighed. She didn't know what to do, this was too much to handle at once. She knew Lucas wasn't going to be 'just fine' with this, but him running off wasn't written in her mind under the category 'Possibilities'.

"You really should lie down Karen." Peyton said again.

"I am fine. No need to worry. Just go find my son." But when she took a step forwards, she barely seemed to be able to keep standing onto her feet.

"To me it seems like I should worry." Peyton answered and took a hold of Karen's shoulders. It took the girl another five minutes to talk the woman into bed but eventually Karen gave in.

When Peyton closed the bedroom door behind her, she couldn't help to let a few frustrated tears escape.

What was it with Tree Hill that everything ended up with drama, drama, and again drama? But she had to find Lucas. She ran to Lucas' room, grabbed her leather jacket and messenger bag form Lucas' office chair before storming out of the door to her Mercury Comet.

When her car began to purr underneath her like a little cat, her foot hit the accelerator pedal and speeded off to the Rivercourt. Lucas would be there, he always was, he always would be there. If something went wrong, it was the only safe haven to run off to he knew. She couldn't blame him.

It didn't take her long to find him, once she parked her car on the grass beside the Rivercourt, she saw him standing in the middle of it, his blue eyes looking at the ring.

She didn't greet him when she putted her first foot on the concrete of the basketball court. She didn't want to greet him. She wanted, silence. She wanted, calm. She wanted a moment before the long expected storm would burst above her head.

She walked up to him, at his brooding figure in the middle of the court. She brought her arms up to him to take him into an embrace but he stepped back. Assuming it was unexpected, she tried again, but again she earned the same reaction of the blond boy she called her boyfriend.

"Luke?" She asked confused, a little layer of hurt beneath it. Again she reached her arms out to him.

"Don't." He said coldly. The blue of his eyes wasn't longer the blue of soothing skies but the blue of the endless deep ocean.

"Come on." Peyton brought out helplessly. The layer of hurt becoming thicker in her voice.

"She kept it from me Peyton." He almost yelled.

"She's scared Lucas." Peyton pleaded.

"Not scared enough to tell you. To tell her son's girlfriend first above her own son!" Now he yelled.

"She was scared you would react like this. And by the way Lucas Scott, I found out by accident yesterday." She added, she couldn't take the reproach he threw into her lap.

That seemed to shut him up. His face darkened even further and Peyton couldn't stop herself from feeling the bangs of guilt in her chest, realising she was a part of it.

And even more unexpected than the first thunder after a long dragging summer day, Lucas' legs seemed to give out. They forgot whatever what was there function and let Lucas pool on the ground like he was jell-o.

"Lucas?!" And in less than two seconds Peyton sat right beside him. Panic shot painfully harsh through her fragile body. "Lucas?!"

"Why?" Was his answer. Short, painful and cutting like a knife.

"Why?" Tears rolling down over his cheeks like they had never done anything else.

"Why?!" His hands clenched into Peyton's shirt, letting it tighten around her chest. It was clenching as tight as the feeling of being scared around her heart.

"I don't know baby. I don't know." She whispered against his temple while she tried as best to cradle his masculine body against hers.

"Why?" He mumbled against her chest when he hided his head covered with thick blond hair against it. His body crumbling against hers, like he wanted to burry himself in her. Just like a little boy.

His sobs were heartbreaking when they hollowed through the Sunday afternoon air of early autumn. His tears soaked the material that covered her upper body. The bitter droplets soaked until her bare skin.

Her lips let escape soothing noises, hoping it would cause his shaking and bawling frame would relax into her arms, but unfortunately the jolting of his body didn't decrease.

The seconds ticked away on the clock and made the day grow further into the early evening when both blonds held each other for life on that court. They could have looked like the ending scene of a current love tragedy, the present-day Julia and Romeo or Tristan and Isolde.

"Lucas." She gently warmed his ear with her breath. His sobbing had decreased into harsh and broken breaths. "I think we should go home." She softly let the words drip into his ear. She swallowed the words 'Your mom is already worried enough' before she could speak them, not wanting him to thunder again.

She took him by the hand after he got up slowly and leaded him to her Comet. Once they sat down, another threatening silence began. Even through this silence was interrupted by the noises of the traffic outside and the noise that her old car made. But it made it more intense, more like another thunder could destroy the sky of peace.

Peyton even was afraid to turn on the radio. She was afraid to even do something too forceful. Anything to scare him or upset him was banned from the list of 'to do'.

She wasn't afraid anymore for the flashes of his eyes, the thunders of his voice, the storms of his body. A better word to describe her feeling was terrified. When they stopped before his house, the silence began to press on her lungs it seemed.

But there was not time to get frightened of the inevitable now. Straight through the storm … was always a good advice.

But she wasn't as sure of that anymore when she heard the backdoor fell in lock after she and Lucas had walked in and Karen's head appeared around the corner. The muscles on the backside of his neck stiffened, as the rest of his body.

"Lucas." Karen said softly. Her voice was raspy, the evidence of her crying. The tracks of her make up disgraced her face.

For a moment of two Lucas' mind stayed empty of thoughts. This issue was left to his heart. A heart that at this moment, staring into the big eyes of his mother who had betrayed him, felt too weak and too selfish to deal with anything.

The blue of his eyes froze into ice. A cold look ended up on the older woman's body before another wooden door was slammed shut.

There they were again. A sobbing brunette and a torn blonde, in the same hallway. Karen putted her hand against the hallway wall for some support, the sobs overpowering her body. Peyton stood five steps away from her, torn between comforting a heartbroken woman and supporting a heartbroken boy who happened to be her boyfriend.

She swallowed hard, wishing she could freeze time for a moment, to get her thoughts on the same line. She wanted to reconsider the benefits and disadvantages of comforting Karen or Lucas. She wanted time to figure this out, not to handle impulsive and do the wrong thing, which seemed to be one of her many bad habits.

But she couldn't freeze time. She didn't get the time to consider. She didn't get anything at all. Anything but two broken messes she had to take care of since they didn't take care of each other.

Even she loved Karen so much, her heart told her to go and comfort Lucas. She didn't want to give him reason to feel more betrayed than he already felt. She needed his thrust, she needed his love.

Carefully she opened the door and slipped inside to find him laying on his back with a blank expression on his face, his hand nervously but steadily throwing a mini basketball against the ceiling before catching it again and repeating the action time after time.

"Lucas."

The sound of the little orange ball bouncing against the ceiling was suddenly harsher.

"Lucas."

Again a bounce could be heard, this one was more threatening.

"Luke."

The rebound this time was so hard that for all Peyton knew, it could have made a hole in the ceiling. It was as hard as the sounded yell of his voice.

"What is it Peyton?!"

The growling thunder of his voice made her freeze on the spot. She had to swallow the lump in her throat away before she could speak again.

"I thought maybe you wanted to talk about this." She almost whispered.

"Why should I? Go take off to my mom and make some other secrets for me!" The lump was back in her throat, heavier this time. She felt a sob coming up from deep inside her.

"Luke." She sobbed, in just a second she was on the bed, her hand clenching into the material that covered his chest.

"Luke. Come on." But he pushed her away from him.

"Leave Peyton!"

In only a beat his bedroom door swung open.

"Don't you dare Lucas Eugene Scott." Karen said coldly.

"Don't you dare to put this on Peyton when you're mad at me." She said while her finger poked into the air.

Lucas groaned while shaking his head and got up, ready to leave again, but that was excluded Karen's willpower.

"And don't you dare to walk away from this. You're not leaving this room before things are solved."

Angry because he was being opposed, he sat down on his office chair.

Karen took another moment to prepare herself before she began at the task she had been avoiding earlier today.

"I am sorry for jumping on you like this with the news. I am sorry for the circumstances I told you. I am sorry for keeping this form you for this long. I am sorry for not thrusting you."

Lucas turned his head away from her. He didn't want her apologies.

"But did you think this is easy for me?" And the strength she had spoken with before was gone.

"That I'll have to raise another child alone. A child that has your uncle, the love of my life, as father. A child that will never know its father. A child that will have more 'why's' than you'll ever have?"

Tears were spilling now from Karen's big eyes.

"But why now mom? Why n-?" He got up from his chair but his mother interrupted his sentence.

"Don't you think I would want to know why this happens now?" Karen sobbed.

"I am sorry mom." Lucas was the verge of tears himself. "I didn't mean to hurt you or upset you. It's just so unfa-"

Karen pulled him into a hug when the threatening tears began to roll down on his cheeks.

"I know, I know." She whispered while softly rubbing his back. It looked so weird. A mother almost rocking her twenty centimetres longer son who cried. Peyton felt more like a spy.

Karen let go of him after a few minutes.

"You okay?" She asked softly, looking into his puffy eyes.

"I'm fine. What about you? You look a little tired mom. Maybe you should rest a while, I guess this must have been a hard day on the little buddy down there too." His voice was as warm as the gesture of his big hand on the baby bump of his mother's belly.

"I'll think I'll do that." She said before placing a motherly kiss on his forehead and disappearing through the door.

He turned around to find Peyton standing on the other door, ready to leave.

"Where are you going?" He asked her, suddenly feeling alarmed.

"Home, you told me to leave." She said, the hurt from her voice was hidden in the green of her hazel eyes.

"No. Don't go." He said, grabbing her arm gently. "Stay. I am sorry." He pleaded when he saw her hurt eyes.

She considered for a moment but she knew his intentions were true. And he needed her, even more at this moment, than she needed him.

In silence they lay down on his bed. Even through he was accepting all of this, while he was crying against her chest. Through, at this moment, he seemed to be someone far away from _her _Lucas.

_Her _Lucas, her hero suddenly wasn't that invincible anymore. Her pray for him being less invincible had been heard, but in all the wrong ways.


	32. Where Two Worlds Collide

**_A/N: Here's the new chapter ... I hope you'll enjoy! While reading this chapter you might thnk I am cruel ... but I asure you, I am not that cruel. I'll make it up to you next chapter, I promise. It's not beta-ed ... I know. I kind of have my reasons. Tomorrow I have to do a book report in front of the class and it's making me freak out, and the thought of you guys (or at least some you) will have reviewed by the time I get to check on you makes it a little more bearable. Makes all my nervousness worth it. So no blame on my beta-reader for the mistakes ... my beta-reader is Alaric by the way, I think I forgot to mention ... how could I? He's the best!! You really are, boy... 'Coming To Terms' will be updated next, I hope next week, buit I can' promise anthing, next weekend I won't be at home much so ...but enough of my babbling. Here's the chapter..._**

**Where Two Worlds Collide, There's a Battlefield of Love**

"You do know you're doing the opposite of what I asked you right?" Peyton said when she tore her lips apart from the ones of her boyfriend's to fill her lungs with fresh oxygen.

"I am very aware of that." He whispered on a husky tone, running his tongue over his full lips again, preparing to kiss his beautiful girlfriend again.

"We-" A kiss to her jaw. "Are-" A kiss to her cheek. "Going-" A kiss to her chin. "To-" A kiss to her other jaw. "Be-" A kiss to her other cheek. "Late." A kiss to her lips.

His hands roamed over her body, exploring every crack of it. Not that he didn't know all the special places already. He just loved to explore them again, and again, and again.

"Luke, you do know you were supposed to tie the bow right?" She just after his hands had decided to explore under the material of her low cut dress. "Not to tie, and untie. And tie and untie again, and again and again." She said while her body jolted upwards when his full lips found a sensible spot on her neck.

"I am very aware of that." He mumbled against his neck.

"Than why don't you do something about?" Peyton said while trying to get away from his delicious torture. She placed both hands against his broad shoulders and made an attempt to push him away gently.

"I don't want to go. I'd rather stay here with you." He moaned as her hands ended up rubbing against his shoulders, creating a friction that made him feel warm inside.

"Come on Lucas." Peyton uttered. She decided to make this end since he didn't want to do it. Her small hands, compared to his, covered his and made a motion to move them down, but they ended up on her breast again.

"Are you trying to kill me Peyton Sawyer?" He groaned out in delight, feeling the form of them clearly underneath his fingertips.

"Are you trying to kill me Lucas Scott?" Peyton groaned on her turn in annoyance.

"I know you don't want to go. But." She said when he started to pout. "I promise you, that this was only a pre-show." She said, her hand waving in the air to gesture to the making out session that had occupied them the last half hour. "And tonight, we were home, you'll get the real show."

Lucas' white teeth buried into his lower lip.

"And maybe an after party." She said while taking the two black with white strips of her short black dress into her hand. Lucas' eyes began to drown in lust.

"Now help me." She said, and he did. Carefully he tied the two strips into a bow so her breasts weren't so exposed anymore. He took a step backward so he could see if the bow wasn't messy. And again he felt his hand itch at the sight of his girlfriend in front of him, wearing a short black dress and a pair of white leggings and black pumps. Black, above every colour, was her colour, she just owned it. Her hair was slightly curly. She looked so gorgeous to him.

But Peyton caught his hands this time when they again went for their goal to what located by her breast. She pulled him closer, which confused him and whispered seductive words into his ear.

"I might even repeat the show if you're a good boy tonight." She said, her eyes shining temptingly. Lucas had the hardest time not to let his imagination go wild. Normally she wouldn't promise anything like this. Normally she would tell him to be patient until they had the chance to return to her home, a chance when Karen would be out long enough. Normally she just would tease him, she wouldn't break the rules, and she would be a good girl. But tonight would be different.

A knock on the door interrupted nothing but a silence and an intense gaze session.

"You kids ready to go?" Karen asked through the door.

"Ready." Lucas said while opening the door.

"You two look handsome." She said, observing her son's girlfriend and her son who matched that girl and her outfit perfectly. She had to admit that she had raised a good-looking son, and black was definitely his colour, beside blue of course.

"Should I drive?" Lucas asked swiftly once they got by their car. The last week Lucas had transformed into his old self as bad or as good he could have. Little Lucas had crawled back into the place were he had been hidden for so long it seemed. Lucas was accepting the fact of his mother's pregnancy, giving it a place in his mind, by being there for his mother. He was even more helpful than he already used to be. He didn't want to admit, but he observed his mother quiet frequently. Kind of almost spying on her. Peyton caught him a several times during the week when he was watching his mother doing simple task of the housework. If he saw her even just struggle a little. If she just paused a moment when she was cutting the vegetables for dinner, he would jump into action, taking the work from her. She wasn't allowed to lift anything, and she had to take a nap at noon when he was at home. Actually she was forbidden to do anything. She found it very adorable that Lucas showed how much he cared, how much he wanted to make everything better, but his behaviour was beginning to get very annoying from time to time.

"I can drive. Put yourself on the backseat with Peyton and make out for all I care." She said. Peyton grinned and Lucas looked a little offended.

During the six days since he had found out the news, he had felt guilty about the way he had reacted. It wasn't supposed to be that way. He had been thinking already thousand times about how he would have reacted differently. He would have been calm, understanding. He hadn't been blaming, yelling, and thundering. But he couldn't do it over again, but he needed to make it up to her. His mother didn't deserve the pain he put her through, she hadn't raised him that way, but he just couldn't help himself. Inside him, someone else still lived to, and every once in a while, he got out. Little, little Lucas.

"I still can't believe we're going to a party that Rachel arranged." Lucas groaned when they finally where in the car, his mother driving, he and Peyton in the backseat.

"She just wants to be nice Lucas. She probably feels so guilty about the whole accident. She just wants a second chance to make it up to everyone she hurt." Peyton said softly, trying to calm her boyfriend down. It had been a hard job to convince him to throw away his Saturday night for a party from Rachel. Normally they would be watching a movie right now by Peyton's house and afterwards they could make love, the highlight of their week. Even through today he was going to get lucky anyway, it just was different.

"I have a really bad feeling about this." Lucas sighed when he got out of the car at Tric.

"It's going to be just fine Lucas. I promise." Peyton said while taking his hands in her and softly letting them sway around. "I promise." She repeated again before pressing her lips to his for a tender kiss.

The bad feeling that had been wrapped around Lucas like an aura was being answered as soon as they entered Tric.

"Happy Birthday Brooke!"

A banner graced the bar.

"Damn it." Lucas said and turned around, also Peyton wasn't really amused with what Rachel had tricked them into.

Peyton knew she had to react quickly. "Okay. We'll hide somewhere but we have to stay here until it ends, okay? Your mom, remember?" Peyton whispered against his tense body.

"We're just going to get a drink and hide somewhere, there are plenty places to hide remember?" She desperately tried to take the negative energy off this situation. The only thing, it was only negative energy. Soothingly she rubbed his back with a circling movement of her hand so the muscles would relax, but they didn't.

Lucas was cursing like there was no tomorrow on the inside. If he saw Rachel, it wouldn't be her best day. Could the girl be even more a witch? Okay, black hair and an ugly face would help. It took almost everything he had in him to not turn around and storm out of the door. The realisation that he could have laid down on Peyton's couch together with her at this exact same moment, made him feel immensely betrayed. He had been planning a romantic evening because he wanted to make up for the way he had behaved last Sunday. The awful he had blamed her for something she wasn't a part of. Yes, he had planned a romantic evening that would turn into passionate night. Selfish maybe, but he was sure Peyton wouldn't mind either. The last week had been physically calm, just a lot of cuddling and a little bit of kissing from time to time, but this afternoon his needs had intensified. He preferably would take her to her own home and give her the time of her life but the pleading look on her face made him chance his mind. The factor of his mom needing help with the cleaning up afterwards wasn't minor either.

Against his will he sat down by the bar with Peyton, waiting for their drinks when all of a sudden a well-known voice rose up behind their backs.

"Well, well. Daddy Scott came." Rachel said, her arm ending up on around Lucas' neck, earning a very dirty look from Peyton.

"Daddy Scott? What the fuck Rachel? Drunk already?" He said, shrugging his shoulders with much violence so she would loose her 'embrace'.

"You didn't see Brooke, didn't you?" She took a dramatic pause, like she was preparing herself for something. "Ooh, that's right, you haven't talked to the poor girl in months?" Rachel took the time for another dramatic pause, an uncomfortable tension building up.

"What is it with Brooke, Rachel?" Lucas asked irritated, wishing that she would just get lost.

Both Lucas and Peyton didn't know that this wasn't the most uncomfortable thing, something much, much worse than they could imagine at this moment was coming up.

"She's pregnant Lucas. With your child."

Peyton went dead pale before his eyes when Lucas tried to progress the information in his mind. Unfortunately it went in overdrive and the information got stuck somewhere. It stopped before the gates of progress.

"What?!" He yelled. Peyton looked like she was about to faint.

"Brooke Davis is expecting your kid Lucas Scott. History is repeating. Like father, like son…"

Rachel was damn lucky she was from the female gender, otherwise she would have been shoved down against the floor and would have given her a home made face lift Lucas style.

And this time it went through the gates and his mind went in overdrive. He didn't know what to do even there weren't that many options. He was trying to figure a solution out that involved making sure Peyton was fine, the news wouldn't spread and getting Brooke to talk to him in private. But sadly for Lucas, Peyton decided to run away the exact moment Brooke passed only a few metres away from him.

This was his chance to get her, he was aware of that but the sight of his girlfriend chasing away between all the people that had showed up for Brooke's birthday party. He honestly didn't know what to do.

Lucas knew how Peyton's mind worked. Once getting too much unwanted information, she only needed a few seconds to shut down, to run and hide. Just like what she was doing now. He knew if he went after her now, it would be useless, she probably would reject him and could he blame her? She had just heard that her boyfriend was going to have baby with another girl, a girl that happened to be her ex-best friend. But that was the point, what was Lucas supposed to do? It was his ex-girlfriend and his child they were talking about. Going after Brooke would mean he would chose his child over the love of his life. But going after Peyton would mean he would chose the love of his life over his own child.

What should he do? Oh what should he do?

Lucas Scott himself was a child abounded by his dad, and even this was nothing compared to what Dan did, it was eating him already alive.

He forced himself not to think with his heart, because his already hurt heart know felt like it was being cut in two. He needed to think with his mind, to take the right decision when he felt how little Lucas Scott was fighting to come out again.

"Brooke!" He screamed exhausted at the brunette. His thoughts had worn him out, only in fact, they had only occupied a few seconds.

His ex-girlfriend stopped in dead tracks. Her eyes shot fire.

"What are you doing here?" She snapped at him. "Shouldn't you be doing incredibly, sickly adorable with your dearest Peyton Sawyer?" She said, not even caring to hide her irritation. "Who invited you here anyway?" She was not giving him a chance to answer him.

"Rachel and we didn't even-" He cut himself off. "I need to talk to you in private." He said with an undertone of urgency in his voice.

"You need?" She laughed, ignoring the serious look in his eyes.

"Yes I 'need'." He emphasized the verb of the sentence since she didn't seem to get it, or she just was playing around with him.

"Oh, you need me." She said, her eyes getting dark with a feeling Lucas didn't recognise, or just chose to not recognise.

He placed a hand around her wrist and dragged her of to a tiny hallway. He made sure he stood before her and her back faced the wall so she wouldn't escape him before he had a decent talk with her but before he even got the chance to speak a word, her hands ended up on his shirt and her lips against his neck.

"God, I missed you needing me." She mumbled against his soft skin. For a single moment, he was frozen. For a single moment, he couldn't think. For a single moment, he felt his mind was doing a 360 in his head. But that single moment passed, and reality hit with a force so unexpected that he felt the blood rush from his veins to nowhere.

"Brooke." His voice that he assumed would have sounded so strong and furious, was only a whisper that atop of all sounded as weak as his broken heart.

"Lucas, I missed you so badly." Her mouth leaving his skin for a moment, her hands dropping low. Dangerously low.

And finally he gained his strength back. His hands flying to hers to pin them against the wall.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Nothing, I am just trying to give you a good time since your tease left you alone."

Lucas wanted to scream at her, wanted to even slap her. But only if she wasn't possibly carrying his flesh and blood. But without the thought, this situation wouldn't be at all.

His breathing went into a harsh panting pace. His hands clenched to fists in a painful way. A sudden wave of sickening feeling washed over him. He needed to relieve himself from the tension that was building on his body when he felt his heart tighten in his chest. He squeezed it blue eyes shut.

"You're carrying my child Brooke!"

So, now it was out. He might have maybe better opened his eyes, because something about Brooke was passing him by. Something very important.

Silence, dull and filled with drowned noises. A silence that turned Lucas into an insecure boy.

Brooke's hand onto her belly. "Lucas." Followed on a pleading tone. And it took nothing more than those two actions for Lucas to just lose it. His mind went in overdrive again. He refused to think again. To let this all through. He didn't want to get the message. He didn't want to think about explanations He didn't want to think about want to think of solutions. Actually, he didn't want to think about true or false either. Little Lucas was crawling out, and everyone who knows little Lucas, knows little Lucas isn't reasonable.

Tears blurred his vision. His hands pushed everything and everyone out of the way which or who blocked him when he rushed outside the building. He didn't know how he managed but in no time he was running like he was hunted by the Headless Horseman. He ran so fast that his legs barely could keep up with him. His blood began to hasten through his veins. His breathing rhythm was broken. His throat burned. But most of all, his heart hurt. It hurt above everything else. Nothing hurt as much as his already broken heart.

Lucas didn't know how, but the one moment he was running and the other moment his realisation hit again he was his bedroom, curled up on his bed. His pillow pressed between his knees and his chest.

The pillow. The soft texture. It smelled like her. Just like her. Just like his precious Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer. The girl he claimed to be the love of his life, he hurt her again. Again, after he even had promised her and her mother and her father he wouldn't do it again. But what do they say, old habits die hard?

His sobs were deep and wearing him out. His tears were salt and many at once. His head was pounding like if it was being smashed against brick repeatedly. And it hurt. It all hurt.

He hurt.

She hurt.

They hurt.

Hurt each other, and themselves and everyone in between.

This couldn't be happening. Not now. Not ever.

Was it a crime to be Lucas Scott and Peyton Sawyer and be happy together?

Was it a crime so bad it deserved this form of punishment?

Was this all still payback of betraying Brooke with the feelings neither of them had controlled because they simply couldn't.

Was this the price of being meant to be?

And did they really have to pay it?

When did this happen? How did this happen? Why did this happen? Why, oh why?

Why did Brooke Penelope Davis have to get pregnant now? Why didn't she tell him before now? Was she planning on 'murdering' their child? Her flesh and blood, his flesh and blood.

This all was too much. Too much for Lucas to handle. Too much probably for anyone to handle. What was he supposed to do now?

His child or the love of his life?

Were Lucas Scott had come from, the simple lesson had been teach before. 'Love the child. Love the love of your life. Love the child more.'

His tired body wanted to scream. Scream himself into the exhaustion. Scream himself into sleep and wake up with the only memory he had from this been in the form of a nightmare.

His body prepared to scream. His muscles tensing up. His eyes squeezed shut. His throat ready to welcome to soreness afterwards.

This was the moment, his body searched all his force …

Until a knock on the door interrupted him abruptly.

His mind began to spin. Who could be on his door now? The only reasonable people would be Peyton or Brooke. And neither of them would be easy to face. A heartbroken blonde, heartbroken by the news her boyfriend was expecting a child together with his ex-girlfriend who happened to be also her ex-best friend. Or a brunette that was carrying his child with her.

His body was too tired, too hurt. He felt like getting up from the bed might just take too much energy and as well and his life. But on the other side, his life was already over, he would have to face it once. Maybe once was now.

He got up, not caring if his face was wet from the tears. Not caring about the mess that he would call 'his hair'. It cost him almost all his energy to reach for the handle and pull it down to let the door open.

Lucas' body prepared for the shock, for the hurt, for everything that could go wrong. He swung the door open, prepared to each girl but not to the girl standing before him. Haley James Scott.

"Luke, can I come in?" She sat in a small voice.

"Off course." He said after a few seconds, his mind trying to wrap itself around the fact of Haley standing before.

"Damn. It's dark in here." Haley stated. "Where's the lightsw-" She cut herself when she found the switch and the light cleared the room like a lightening. Nothing was left to be hidden, also Lucas' tearstained face couldn't escape the harshness of the glow.

"Lucas, have you been crying?" She said while walking up to him. Very softly she cupped his face in her hands. His blue looked stumbled to the ground and he bit on the inside of his lip. "What happened? Something with Peyton?" Haley asked while whipping a few left tears away.

Lucas couldn't speak. The lump in his throat was too big. He succeeded in his attempt to swallow it away and throw it all out:

"Brooke's pregnant." The tears that had been threatening to fall now did.

"Ooh." She said, an element in the brown of her eyes changed. Her hands fell away from his cheeks.

"Ooh." She confused her sobbing best friend even more.

"Hales." He sobbed, his hand reaching out for him.

"Luke, I have to tell you something. And we should sit down."

They both sat down on the bed. Lucas looked at his pretty best friend with teary eyes while she prepared to say to him the news that would change his world. But the sad look in his eyes just made her blur out:

"I am pregnant." She gasped for air. "Not Brooke."

The words caused an explosion in his head and than his brain just seemed to black out. Only for a moment, before his words came rushing to the surface, wanting to be spoken. Be which one first? The ones of relief would not fit in. Congratulations, he didn't know, was she happy with the news? The way she was looking at him, with big anxious eyes. But he had to say anything at least.

"Oh Hales." He said, taking her in his arms.

"I am scared Lucas." She said with a shaky voice. "So scared." She quietly sobbed. "Nathan's dreams are finally in reach and now … This changes everything."

"It's going to be okay Hales. Nathan isn't Dan." Lucas softly said while rubbing her back. Haley looked up at him, scared but also hopeful. "And besides, this kid is going to have a great uncle. I learned from the best."

Haley smiled through her tears. Lucas was about to say something else when for the second time that evening someone knocked on his door. Lucas jumped up and opened it quickly. And there she stood, Peyton Elizabeth Sawyer with ruined make up, shivering from the beginning of autumn cold.

"I am sorry Lucas." She sniffed. "I didn't mean to run away." She said uncomfortable. "I-I-" She began to stumble over her words when she saw Haley. "I should go." She mumbled and was ready to turn around.

"Don't go." Lucas said, whiling grabbing her arm.

"I am leaving anyway." Haley said as she got up swiftly. She didn't give Peyton the time as she got up, kissed Lucas' cheek, whispered 'thank you' and left.

"What are we going to do Lucas?" Peyton said broken once the silence got too much.

"Nothing." Lucas answered while taking her in his arms.

"What?"

"She's not pregnant." Lucas said when seeing Peyton's shocked face. "Haley is pregnant." He continued. He expected his girlfriend to laugh but instead she burst into tears.

"Peyton?" He asked confused, his hands cupping her face.

"I am sorry." She sobbed. "I shouldn't have walked away and left you there. I am so selfish but I just was-"

"Scared." He continued. "Scared for us." Completing her.

She nodded.

"I can't lose you Lucas Scott." She said, her fits clenching full with his shirt.

"You won't Peyton Sawyer." He said, kissing the top of her curls.


	33. Everyone's a Champion at Something

**_A/N: Hey hey. Long time ago, I know, don't kill me. Or not at least until you have read this. The chapter is finally up and this time it's beta-ed. Thanks Nick! Warning: it's M, really M-rated. I promised you a smut chapter, so this is it. I hope it's doable. Next story that will be updated is 'Coming To Terms', I already started working on a new chapter. And than, 'Chicago Is So Two Years Ago', but I kind of hit a point there where I really need to reconsider some options and storylines so it might take some time. _**

**_Ooh, I just want to know, who all melted by seeing last eppi and especially the last LP scene? I am still grinning like an idiot over it everytime I think about it. Mmm, LP life is good. _**

**Everyone's a Champion at Something**

The sound of swift but measured footsteps resounded on the wet concrete. It was a steady rhythm forcing a pair of blondes to move over the still-empty streets of Tree Hill. Most people were still in bed. But what do you expect from ordinary people living their everyday life on a Sunday morning? For most people, it means catching up with the sleep you missed the other days, and especially teens used the opportunity to stay in bed. But then again, the two blondes jogging over the Tree Hill streets were anything but ordinary. If you only looked at their history, there wasn't anything ordinary to find there.

Lucas threw a gaze over his shoulder to find his curly girlfriend jogging behind him. Her face was almost as red as the pair of red jogging pants she was wearing. Even she was never going to admit it; Lucas knew she was at the end of her ability to move one leg before the other. They had been running for close to twenty minutes now. It was simply too much for her still tender leg, and even Lucas had to admit that he felt an uncomfortable pressure building up on his chest. Usually, he could easily run three quarters or more, but the stress was getting the better of him.

He stopped at her driveway, earning a confused look from her.

"What? Aren't we going to jog to your house?" She said, still running slowly on the spot. Her ponytail swayed moodily around behind her.

"I am tired, baby girl." He said while reaching a hand out to her.

"You're not. You just think I can't handle." She pouted and put an abrupt stop to her movements.

He sighed and rolled his eyes slightly. "I am really tired, baby. I didn't sleep much last night." He said.

Peyton looked at the ground, guilty. It was true. Even though they knew their relationship was not 'in danger', when relief had been able to run through their veins, both blonds still hadn't been able to catch sleep straight away. There were too much 'ifs' in their heads.

"And besides, I think your leg is still a little too tender for this." Lucas said softly, with a caring tone as his blue eyes flew over her flushed face.

"I knew it!" She said, pointing at him. She pouted again.

"I am so sorry Peyton. What can I do to make it up to you?" He asked playfully, his eyes getting an unpredictable glance.

"Since you assume I don't have the possibility to run, why don't you carry me inside then?" She said, loosening her hair from the hold of the ponytail. Her curls bounced upon her shoulders in a light and subtle manner. He was simply hypnotized by it.

Before he could pick her up and carry her inside, like she had suggested, she ran past him. Her laughter followed her in a trail of happy notes. A second or two after he had seen the blonde figure pass him by, he prepared his body for another moment before he shot into action. He managed to catch his girlfriend a step into the living room. He reached upon his tiptoes, swayed his muscular arms around Peyton's waist and crashed them down on the couch.

They both burst out in spontaneous laughter. Lucas gently leant down to press a sweet kiss on Peyton's lips. The next moment, they both got extremely into it until a painful groan escaped Peyton.

Lucas's head immediately came into reality again, flipping her on top of him. "Sorry." He said instantly. "I must have been crushing you. I'm too heavy."

Peyton just smiled and caressed his face, covered with the slightest stubble, with her fingertips. "You weren't. But my feet are just killing me!"

Without another word being spoken, they both settled themselves into comfortable positions. Lucas sat down on the couch with Peyton's feet in his lap, after he freed them from her trainers and Emily the Strange socks. It was funny actually; the socks perfectly matched her outfit. They were black, like her body-fitting tee and had rather creepy red kitty heads on it, red like her sweatpants.

Peyton pressed her back into the armrest of the couch as soon as Lucas' fingers tickled under the bare soles of her feet.

An almost inaudible groan escaped from her lips at the sensation of the surprisingly soft skin of his fingertips against the tender skin of her soles. She closed her eyes in delight and arched herself her back of the couch as Lucas' thumbs did an attempt to get buried into her skin. It didn't take long for his fingers to jump into action as she moaned out her approval.

"God, Lucas." She couldn't suppress the husky tone in her voice as his fingers dug into the painful spots. His hands were magic. The tension that bundled in her aching feet loosened.

"Oh my." She arched even further of the couch when he hit a practical sensitive place just under her index toe. "You're fucking great at this." She breathed heavily, when his fingers pressured her throbbing feet just in the right manner.

"Oh god, Luke." The words seemed to rise from deepest inside her.

"Don't ever stop doing that." She panted while closing her eyes again; she didn't even know how she got it out with the warmth that started racing through her veins. She felt so familiarly full. She couldn't directly place it.

"Luke. Oh god yes." She jerked her left foot slightly when his fingertips skated down the sole, creating a ticklish sensation. Her foot slightly bumped into something she couldn't immediately identify.

A sharp intake of breath makes her eyes snapped open and the first thing she noticed was the funny shade of fire-engine- red on Lucas' face. Her green orbs followed the red that disappeared under his shirt, and then she let her eyes fell down his lap. Under the black material of sweatpants, the bump was practically invisible, but Peyton knew much better than that.

"Ooh." She let her lips escape. "Baby boy." Her feeling from before was suddenly recognized.

A wide and wicked grin tugged devilishly on the corners of her sweet lips. She didn't continue to say something, but wordlessly she slipped from the couch. Lucas's mind stopped forming coherent thoughts from the moment her knees hit the ground in front of him and her fingers busied themselves with the task of undoing the drawstrings at the front of his pants.

His expression was near-shocked when he saw her looking up at him, a naughty tingle in her gaze. Her hands slipped into his sweatpants and then under the soft material of his boxers. A breath got stuck in his throat when one of her hands roughly took a hold of him. Before he could think further, her other hand yanked down the material that hid the intimate parts of him, slightly covered by her hand. In a beat, he was exposed and Peyton's eyes drank him in.

In some sort of awe, she looked at his manhood, running her index finger over the length of it, slowly from the tip to his balls and back. She bit her lip at finding him already leaking pre-cum as her thumb grazed not-too-lightly over the tip.

Lucas was about to say something when he saw her lick her dry lips but she cut him off, surprising him by taking him in her mouth swifter than he could ever think was possible. And suddenly there was nothing more than her face hidden under her velvet blond hair, the warmth of her mouth around him and the pleasure that rushed through his body, starting at his lower half.

Very slowly, she let her mouth move down his erection. She didn't take him fully in at first. A sort of nervous feeling ran through her veins. This was still pretty new for her.

She took a deep breath and let her mouth travel down again, taking him in a little bit further. Another deep breath and again she let him slide further into her hot mouth; her tongue now teasingly ran over the underside of his cock.

"Fuck," escaped Lucas in an outburst. It took him a lot to not just thrust into her tight mouth at the incredible feeling she caused to run through his abdomen.

Another deep breath and she took him in fully, his tip poking the back of her throat. She squeezed her eyes shut when tears sprung in her eyes, sucking in air to relax the forgotten gag reflex. Lucas noticed and gently ran his hand over the right side of her face, his fingers lightly tracing her ear shell and his thumb teasingly ran behind her earlobe. His simple touch was enough to get her running again with refreshed heat and a determination to make sure he enjoyed every single second of the job she was about to get done.

Slowly while grazing her teeth over his manhood, she moved up again. A groan, which ensured Peyton she was driving her boyfriend crazy, escaped him. Encouraged by his groaning and his inability to stay still, she began to pick her speed up by every bob of her head, her fingers stroking around his balls in the exact way she had already learned he liked.

"God, baby." His fingers got lost in her blond velvet hair. His breathing became more ragged, and the ability to make coherent thoughts was far gone by now.

"Peyton. Stop." He breathed when he saw the stars appear before his eyes as she dragged her tongue from the base to the tip.

But she didn't stop; instead she took him all in again. The following words of protest were drowned in a deep, breathtaking sigh.

"Blondie," He tried again, "Stop." His hands, fisted in her hair, gently tugged for her to let go.

"What?" She said innocently, but her eyes gave him the look she had given him when Whitey had come for 'the other Scott', which now seemed like an eternity ago. Her fingernails teased the skin of his thighs.

"I am so close. Too cl-" He didn't get to finish his sentence since she took his talking as a distraction and she let her mouth sink onto him again.

"Fuck." The F-word escaped him for the second time that day and this time he couldn't suppress the jerk of his hips, causing him to awkwardly bump against her.

She was simply driving him nuts. Her now O-shaped mouth, her flexible lips, warm tongue and white teeth. His climax was just caresses away. He didn't even need to tell Peyton because she was well aware of the fact. The way he could barely control his jerking hips, his broken breathing and almost satisfied look on his flushed face spoke volumes.

"Peyt." Her pet name rolled from his lips like his eyes into his head. A groan with a capacity loud enough to wake the whole house followed when his orgasm hit Lucas and his cum freely flew down her throat. The look in her green eyes could only be described as dirty when she looked up at him, while he felt the vibration of her swallowing motion and his look tumbled down on her through his hooded eyes.

Finally she let him escape out her warm mouth and putted his boxers and sweatpants back up. She couldn't help the grin that spread over her face when she saw his shocked expression.

"What?" She said while she letting it fell to her shoulder. "Didn't you like it?" She pouted, playing hurt. Of course he had liked it; she never had known him to come harder from what she just did.

"It's unquestionable that I liked it." He murmured. "I always like it when you're a dirty girl."

She bit her lip. "And doesn't _your_ dirty girl need to be washed?" Peyton purred. "Maybe the filth will come off." Her brow cocked up in a way only she could, and damn, it made her fucking sexy.

"Let's see." He husked while he nuzzled his weird nose against the side of her face.

His strong arms slipped under her and he hastily carried her to the bathroom, a trail of laughter falling after them.

Their hands impatiently tugged on each other's clothing. It didn't take long before their shirts lay on the tile floor of the bathroom. After that, Lucas decided to take the lead and freed Peyton from her lively red pants. As the material was replaced by bare skin, so followed kisses on said skin.

She was left in her black and red sport bra and panties. His eyes roamed hungrily over her barely-covered skin. "So sexy, baby girl." His hands were ready to welcome the feel of her perky breasts.

"Not so fast there, mister." She said, grabbing his hands out of the air. She held them while she moved down, her ass swaying like one of a dancer. Her hands running smoothly over the material that covered his pants. When the rough material of his trainers polished against the skin of her palms, her hands moved slightly upward again, her fingers curling around the ends of his pants. With one heavy motion and the sound of snap fasteners popping open, his pants were gone. God, Peyton simply adored tear-away pants.

"Why can't all your clothing be like this?" Her warm breath ghosted over her skin as she husked.

"Because it wouldn't be a fair compensation if you look at all the things I have to deal with to get you naked." He stated matter-of-factly against her lips, his fingers getting lost in the blonde hair at the back of her head, forming a ponytail and his thumbs slowly caressing the skin of her neck.

His hands left her hair to play with the straps of her sport bra on her shoulders. Soon his fingers found its way under the straps and he peeled the supporting undergarment off her body, her panties after that.

Peyton turned the shower on, allowing the first rush of cold water to pass while she undid Lucas of his boxers and she was been freed by him of her underwear. Once under the spray of hot water, they waited until their hair had transformed into a shade of dusky brown before starting at the task to get the 'filth' off.

Lucas's hands soon were massaging a creamy white substance in her slick hair. He gently shielded her eyes as the lathering shampoo dripped from her hair unto her body. White, watery trails travelled over her body, through her cleavage, over her flat tummy and over her so long legs.

Lucas realised this wasn't going to be a quick shower.

He softly bent his knees a bit to make Peyton's job a little easier on her as she, on her turn, massaged the shampoo in his short hair.

Then she reached for the lavender soap. Officially, this shower was going to drive him beyond crazy.

Swiftly he took the bottle from her hands and squirted the light tint of violet stuff on his hands. He began his task at her shoulders before letting his hands slid over her arms to her hands. Then they were on her tummy, rubbing circles around her belly button. Peyton was about to open her mouth as Lucas cut her off by gliding his soapy hands to her breasts. The firmness with which Lucas 'supported' her breasts made Peyton lean backward against the wall to search for a support for her wobbling knees.

The triumphantly look in his blue eyes was answered by a moan from her side. Then another moan, and another when he added some more soap on his hands and rubbed circles around her breasts, using all of his hands to make sure she wouldn't forget this moment soon.

After the profuse attention for her breasts, his fingers traced her hipbones before Lucas arrives at his own private heaven; her legs.

With firm strokes he rubbed the soap into her long legs, caressing the skin every once in a while with a kiss. He worked from her feet to her tights. His hands informed her to spread her legs a little wider so he could work the inner side of her legs. Peyton couldn't help a wet rush when his fingers teased around her core. When she thought he would finally do something to decrease the pressure there, he moved up, and placed his mouth beside her ear, his lips almost against her earlobe. "Turn around," came out in a heated tone and the tip of his tongue ran, almost as light as a feather, against her earlobe.

A jolt of excitement went through her body before she could obey and make herself turn around. He started again at her shoulders, his fingertips tracing the shoulder blades before the index finger of his right hand trailed over the full length of her spine. Again she couldn't help herself as she pressed her body backwards, her rear end meeting his rather sensitive male area. A massive moan escaped from his lips without holding back. Peyton was now filled with triumph when his hands shakily washed her back.

"Time to get you washed." She said, one eyebrow rising teasingly. On her turn, she took a hold of the bottle filled with violet shower gel. In less than ten seconds, she was rubbing the skin of his broad shoulders. She loved the feel of his skin. The muscles underneath it were simply fascinating, the way they moved based on activity and passivity.

Her pressuring movements moved down his arms to his hands, and even his fingers got special treatment. Her eyes had already drinking in the sight of her next target. His chest.

If she loved a part of his body, then it was his chest. The centre of his body, trapped between the heroic arms that carried her out of that school. Above his rippled abdomen that she loved to run her hands over. But most of all, it was the home of his broken heart; which he claimed, she owned every broken piece of.

Her soapy hands moved in circles over his shoulders, massaging it gently. They made their way in the same fashion over his chest, her fingers teasingly scrapping over his large nipples. She simply adored the moan that she dragged from his full lips by what she just had done. Her hands moved further southward, her fingers tracing the lines of his six-pack before moving to the sides of his body where her thumbs outlined his hipbones and the other fingers curled around his hips.

Lucas drew a breath in, in anticipation for what was next to come. When her hands would descend the place where his body was starting to ask for her attention. His chest heaved when he saw her lips part, ready to split the water with her words.

"Turn around, baby."

A rush of disappointment mastered his body, he couldn't help it. But that soon enough changed when he saw her eyebrow lift in typical Peyton Sawyer fashion. She was so going to make it worth it.

Willingly, he turned around, waiting for her delicate touch. And he achieved it, her hands exerting on his skin, modelling as it was clay. Like she could create the muscles herself.

Again in a rubbing motion, working the soap in his skin, from his shoulders all over his spine. When she was done with soaping his back, she reached up her tiptoes and placed a soft kiss on the back of his neck while she let her hands run down with flat palms against his skin. They stopped by the globes of his butt, teasingly squeezing them.

A gasp filled the shower as his body thrust backwards at the unexpectedness of her touch. She loved the feel of his body moving against hers.

"Peyton."

"What, Luke? I love your ass." She whispered in his ear, gently nipping on his earlobe. "But let's get this job done and get to the point." Her breath as hot as the water against his body.

She went to sit down on her knees so she could wash his legs. It was pure torture for Lucas, her hands kneading his calves and taunting the sensitive skin on the back of his knees before moving to massage his thighs.

"You can turn around again." She said softly. As he did, she felt the water starting to cool down slightly. And she knew this shower, if it cooled down a bit at first, from thereon it didn't take another minute to go ice cold.

She went up again to press a slightly lingering kiss to Lucas' mouth. Before he could deepen it, she was already out of the shower, well aware of what was next to come.

Cursing.

F-word, S-word … some other naughty words were produced within' five seconds. Peyton couldn't help but burst into laughter.

"So this is funny, huh?" He said, once out of the shower, shivering from head to toe, goosebumps clearly visible on his skin from the warmth being so suddenly replaced by cold.

Peyton really couldn't stop laughing, a fact Lucas didn't enjoy.

When she closed her eyes for a moment to wipe away the tears that had formed from her laughing, Lucas took the opportunity to turn things around. He swiftly moved up behind her, his arms sneaking around her body. His right hand moved northward, the left one southward.

"See, I need something to warm me up again." The fingers of his right hand splaying out against the outlines of her breasts as his other hand disappeared between her legs. A whimper rose from her throat.

His fingertips brushed briefly over her folds, causing a shiver down Lucas' spine at the feel how wet she already was. The lightness of his touch didn't relieve any pressure that had suddenly built up in her; actually it only made it grow. She groaned out in frustration as he repeated the same actions a few times, building a pressure so intense she could barely stand on her own to feet. She was glad that Lucas was mostly supporting her with his rare hold.

"Luke. Please?" She whined as he kept teasing her, leaving her needs unsatisfied.

"Seems like we have another idea of fun." His tone was cocky, but he finally let one of his fingers brushed over her clit not too lightly.

"Aah." Her shoulders pressed into his chest, her head falling onto his shoulder. "God." She spread her legs a little wider to allow him more access. Instead of repeating the action, he went back to lightly outlining her wet folds.

She wailed softly. "Lucas, please?" Her lips brushed against the skin nearest to her reach. But he didn't give her anything; he kept repeating the motion again and again.

"Baby." She pushed her ass against him. "I am sorry." Her hand travelled to his. "It wasn't fun." Placing her hand atop of his. "You know what?" Her voice whispered in his ear. "You can do whatever with me. Anything that will warm you up again." Her hands gripped his hips to keep him close to her. "Anything." She husked, pressing herself into him, the feel of his rock-hard erection against her skin not escaping her.

That wasn't a line she had to say twice to her boyfriend. A deep growl escaped him and he wasted no time, forcing her to step forward until they bumped into the first object they came across. The sink.

"God, I got to have you." He said, forcing her hastily but kindly to lean down on the sink. His hands ran all over the front of her body, exploring her breasts and nipples again, her tummy and belly button, dropping lower between her legs again. Now he finally gave her something she wanted, his fingers rubbing against her throbbing core.

"You're so wet." He mumbled against the skin between her shoulder blades.

"Always when you touch me, Lucas."

She could feel him breathe against her.

Their lovemaking so far had been always gentle, loving, needing intimacy. If you excluded their little encounter in school which had been raw need. They still had the eye contact, the need for a kiss since it was the closest sign of intimacy apart from the act of love itself.

They needed that intimacy around.

But that was about to change. Not fully. But they were letting go of the 'psychological' intimacy. The positions where they always were connected with their eyes, where they could kiss mouth to mouth, the need deep inside to know they were there for each other. The reassurance of seeing each other, to feel and hear each other's breathe, the possibility to share them from time to time.

They could let go of it now. They knew that after last night there was no way they would separate. They had survived the heavy storm, today they were floating in the aftermath.

And actually they weren't fully giving up on their 'psychological' intimacy- on the properly mouth-to-mouth kissing, yes; on the eye-contact, not completely. Above the sink was a mirror which reflected their flushed, lustful faces.

His breathes were merely pants stringed together. The image of her face drowned in thrill and her lips buried into her lower lip, made him even harder than he had been before. His need to be one with her was on at a peak. He needed to feel her now, after all the teasing. He needed to feel her for real.

Peyton was slightly confused when the warmth of his body was taken away from her. She turned her head to find him rummaging through her towel closet. She smiled. Peyton Sawyer kept condoms everywhere, in all sort of hidden places. A habit she had developed when she had dated Nathan which seemed like an eternity ago. She had been so young when she joined the 'adult game' with him, and she wanted to be sure her dad didn't find out. Even now, the habit had stayed.

Without protesting, Lucas took out a condom, ripping open the package and placing the rubber on himself. Peyton was sure he would never complain about it again, not after what last night did to them.

"You ready?" He heatedly whispered, positioning himself at her slick entrance. His eyes stared into the mirror, seeing the reflection of her nod there. Very slowly he entered her, taking in every sensation of her walls clenching around him, gently easing his way into her until he was up to the hilt. He had been watching her expression through the mirror; fucking sexy, was all he could think.

"Fuck." He groaned when he filled her completely. He leaned as close as possible over her, making sure he was not burdening her back.

His eyes, as well as hers, looked to their reflections in the mirror.

Their gazes met on the glass.

Their bodies so close together.

Their hearts beating rapidly.

His skin radiating warmth on hers and visa versa.

The feeling of the efforts of breathing against each other.

Intimacy, so pure.

Lucas never experienced something like this with Brooke. These levels of intimacy.

Skin.

Eyes.

Breathing.

Heartbeats.

Sure Brooke had loved certain intimacy, skin on skin. Of course, she hadn't preferred eye contact like Lucas did. She never took the time to listen to his breathing. Not even to listen to his heart that had sometimes struggled not to fail.

His blue eyes kept fixated on the mirror like her green eyes, watching how they moved against one another, the expressions on their faces changing by every different thrust.

"Luke." She moaned when he hit her deep again. "I'm close." She panted, giving him a meaningful look through the mirror. A lust-filled groan escaped her when he slightly changed the angle of his trusts.

"Please." She whimpered, the tension on her body was unbearable, she ached for release. Lucas ached for the same; he knew this would end pretty soon.

His right hand travelled between her legs while the other still supported her. The fingertips found the sensitive bundle of nerves between her wet folds. He almost lost it when he felt the jerking of her body caused by his forceful trusts. Gently he rubbed over her special spot and without any announcement, she came screaming out his name. The unexpectedness of her orgasm triggered his after a few more thrusts.

They panted against each other, trying to find support on the sink and in each other when their legs felt like jell-o. The strength slowly returned after a few minutes.

"Maybe we should lie down." Peyton said, reaching her hand behind her to cup his face.

"Fabulous idea." He mumbled when he gently left her. Lucas removed the condom and threw it in the trashcan before he let Peyton reach for his hand.

Quietly, they walked to her bed, before falling onto it and crawling under the covers to hide their naked bodies. Silence kicked in as they just laid down there, watching each other. Faces still in a funny shade of pink, hair wet, skin covered in goosebumps. Peyton moved closer to him, her head resting against his shoulder, her hand falling onto his chest.

"You liked to be in control, didn't you?" Peyton said while tracing a finger over his chest teasingly, her leg sneaking upon his.

"Like you didn't like it to be in control either?" He said, looking beside him, taking in her still flushed face. His brow wiggled at her.

For a minute there was silence before she spoke again.

"I think we needed it." She simply whispered, her index finger again starting to doodle on his chest. "After last night." She looked up at him. "I think we needed to feel to be in control for a bit."

Lucas looked down at his girl. She was right. His little wise girl.

They had needed to feel in control, since last night they had clearly suffered a loss of that feeling. They needed to know that they could set things to their own hand if they wanted, even in a situations like this.

Control was power, a certain level of power about whatever was a need for people who had had life roll over them too many times before.

And for now they had gained it back, but the question was for how long could they keep it?


	34. I am One Of Them

**_A/N: Yes, you're allowed to kick my ass for letting you all wait so long for this chapter. I feel so so guilty you probably can't even imagine. But instead of me whining about it, like I usually do, I am not going to bother you anymore and just let you read. You'll probably hear more of me soon since I finished another chapter for my 'Coming To Terms' story and I am working on a new 'Chicago Is So Two Years Ago' chapter so ... but for now, just enjoy this one. Plus, warning, it's sort of M-rated to the end of the chapter. _**

**_Much love Veronique aka GirlinTheCafe_**

**I Am One Of Them, Who Tumbled Into an Unpredictable Production**

She was all wet and sticky when she opened the doors of her closet.

The weather had been so unpredictable and so unexpected. Fall was clinging onto its days before winter would try to settle in already.

It had been so hot, her clothes glued onto her body because of the sweat like they were her second skin.

She needed to find clothing that wouldn't give her the feeling of burning on her skin while wearing it. And she needed a shower, she felt terrible and nasty all covered in the salt water that her body produced.

The lukewarm water felt so amazing against her heated body. Little streams of water running into every crook and curve from her long slender body. The scent of her soap drenched her as she rubbed it into her skin. Her delicate hands travelled over her torso, from her breasts over her ribs to her lower tummy. She had gained some weight in the area, much needed weight.

Lucas would love that. He had been pretty obsessed with her eating. He wanted to make sure she gained weight in a healthy way. Tonight he would make them dinner, like he would always do on Fridays, after they had cleaned up the house.

Tonight they would barbeque. It looked like this was going the last day they were going to be able to before the cold would suck away the very last strings of summer heat that had lingered.

Peyton could barely wait until Lucas would be here tonight. She loved Friday's she realised while her hands ran over her slender legs. She slowly started to hum 'Friday, I'm in Love' from The Cure.

When she got out the shower, she began to sing while slipping her black shorts and a tank top on.

_I don't care if Monday's blue_

_Tuesday's grey and Wednesday too_

_Thursday I don't care about you_

_It__s Friday I'm in love_

In her head, she began to make a list of reasons she loved Friday as she walked into her music closet.

There were so many reasons. It was the day the weekend started, when you got to stay up late and didn't have to do anything.

But why she loved Friday the most, it was the first day of two and a half days she could spend with Lucas. Alone. Her own private heaven.

Her fingertips appeared to be much more sensitive when she dragged them slowly among the cardboard loose covers.

A single droplet dripped from her hair and made its wet trail over her back, making her freeze slightly, her mind instantly flashing back to that one night with her birthmother. That evening that had involved a car and a storm. She snapped back to reality and realised her finger rested against the loose cover of Led Zeppelin's 'Houses of the Holy'.

A genuine and simple smile tucked at the corners of her lips. It had been Ellie's favourite album.

Her heart ached underneath the surface. She missed Ellie, was her sudden realisation.

The feeling of guilt nibbled at heart as she thought back at her stubborn resistance against her birthmother in the beginning. The blonde who had carried her around for nine hard months had only had good intentions. She had given her up because she wouldn't have been a good mother for her. And she had just wanted to get to know her daughter before she died. And Peyton, her stubbornness had almost ruined that.

Peyton truly felt like crying, bitter tears stinging in her green eyes. At moments like this she allowed a few topics that always hided away under the surface, let loose in her mind.

Like her father, but not the one who was Larry Sawyer. Not her adoptive father; her real father, her anonymous, biological father.

Would he be tall, handsome and blond? Would he be all rock 'n' roll, just like Ellie? What would he be doing to for a living now? Actually, what would he be doing right now? At this moment, when the thought filled her mind.

While being drowned under in her thoughts, her hands had subconsciously moved the loose cover she had been holding. An almost inaudible sound and Peyton's gaze tumbled downwards to find a square, white piece of paper at her feet.

She was surprised.

How did it get in there?

That thought filled her mind while she bent down to pick it up from the floor.

She couldn't remember she had putted in there earlier. Her fingers played with the thin, white, folded material between her fingers.

She walked out of the closet, put the little square down on her bed and turned the music on.

The first notes of the first song embraced her warmly. 'The Song Remains the Same' How could the young blonde know that nothing would remain the same if she would walk back to bed and unfold the paper?

"I had a dream. Crazy dream." The singer's voice began and she absentmindedly unfolded the paper.

But the absentmindedness wouldn't stay long as the words flooded into her mind and the music seemed to be plugged out.

Lucas found his girlfriend's room usually quiet and motionless with his blonde laying on her bed, her back facing him.

Actually, the only sound and motion was the one of her proudly owned phonograph. He picked up the slightly off-key sound of her breathing while he approached the bed.

"Peyton?" His voice was deep with concern and curiosity hinting the notes of his well-known, warm sound.

The bed dipped in a familiar way to Peyton. Lucas positioned himself behind her, her back to his front, his head resting on her shoulder.

"What's up, baby?" His voice poured in her ear. Her frame shuttered slightly against his.

"Hey?" He pushed himself up his elbow and attempted to look at her, his hand resting on her shoulder.

His hand resting on her fragile shoulder, his warm breath on the back of her with blond hair covered neck and his voice with evident worry made her body turn around to face him almost on cue.

When she finally faced him, he met big eyes filled with a look that he had only seen once before, when Peyton had found out about Ellie being her biological mother.

At this moment, the same questions assisted by worry, anxiousness, disbelief and this odd form of excitement were hiding in her green globes.

But what could it mean; she couldn't possibly have a third mother, right?

He looked gentle but intensely at her. Lucas rested his right hand on her ribs; vaguely he could feel her heart thump with vitality. His left hand stroked a few wisps of soft hair away.

He was waiting for Peyton to prepare herself to tell him whatever this resembled.

They took their time in silence. Peyton to ready herself and say what needed to be said, Lucas, on the other hand, to prepare to whatever she was going to tell him.

Peyton blinked with her eyes, from the endless focus, the signal that she was ready to share with him.

Lucas was surprised by her hand that moved into his vision, with a white little paper square between her thumb and index finger. With her silent nod and a look of trust and faith in him, Lucas unfolded the paper. Once it was back into the state of its original measurements, it stole Peyton's access to look at his handsome face.

Words written in an unmistakable feminine handwriting fought for attention in his mind. The one after the other, leaving him more shocked with the words he read.

"You have a brother?" Lucas soon realised how dumb it actually sounded to ask that.

"I apparently do." Came her answer with undertone of her shy voice, all disbelief.

"How long have you known this?" His second question came.

Peyton took her boyfriend's wrist to take a look at his watch.

"For about an hour."

"Where did you find this?" his third question.

"In one of the vinyl records Ellie left me. One of her favourites." Her answer was casual, but clearly excited.

"Wow!" That was instead of his fourth question. The amount of information he was progressing and placing was unbelievable.

"Indeed."

Silence enveloped between them. It stayed, neither of them knowing the right words to say.

In her eyes Lucas detected a new kind of nervousness. Without intervention of his mind, his hand began to cress her cheek. She let an audible breath escape from her lips and her eyes closed for a few brief moments. Her body also visibly relaxed.

Lucas loved that he had this effect on his girlfriend. It made difficult situations like this easier to deal with. Time passed and both teenagers lost the actual track of how much time actually had gone by already in silence.

"What are you going to do now?" Lucas interrupted the quietness.

"I don't know," was her honest answer as she shrugged her shoulders.

Lucas looked at her so tenderly, in a way he only mastered. No words where spoken, just green eyes gazing into blue eyes.

It wasn't until Peyton's stomach started to growl none too quietly; they became aware of the darkness that was lightly spreading its first layer in the evening air.

"I guess someone is hungry." And in a flash his boyish smirk appeared, creating a warm and familiar feeling inside of Peyton.

One of his hands rubbed over her growling stomach like he was rubbing a cat or dog's tummy. Then his hand was gone and Peyton replaced it with hers.

Vaguely wondering if the hand had been there, she found herself unable to make a steady grip on reality. Everything seemed so unreal now.

The feeling passed when she saw the numbers of the clock on her nightstand.

"Ooh! I am so sorry, Luke." She said.

"Why?" His endless blue eyes reflected worry.

"I ruined your barbecue plans."

His face showed a mild form of relief.

"You didn't ruin anything, baby." He said reassuringly, seeing how guilty she felt because he had been so excited about it the whole day in school.

To convince her it was just fine, he kindly pressed his lips against hers. Immediately, Peyton pressed herself closer against her boyfriend's body. She was feeling so strangely lost and empty and Lucas' kiss filled that up. Or at least made her forget for a while.

"Not so fast there, tiger." He caught her hand while it moved southward on his body. Immediately her lips formed a pout.

"We're going to make dinner." Lucas said, holding her hand close to his chest.

"But I am not-" Peyton was rudely interrupted by the heavy growling noise of her stomach.

"Hungry?" Lucas guessed while finishing her sentence.

"Silly girl." He said as she gave him her best puppy eyes, but he simply laughed and kissed her nose.

"Come on, let's make some dinner." His voice was loving as he pulled her off the bed and directed her downstairs.

A quarter later, water was boiling and the smell of spicy curry was in the air. Peyton was on the kitchen counter, looking at Lucas stirring the pans.

His blue eyes travelled over to her from time to time. She was quiet, her legs slightly moving as they dangled over the edge.

Gently, Lucas ran his hand along her almost completely bare thigh.

Her head shot up and found him staring lovingly at her, their gazes meeting. It made the silence in the kitchen, and mostly between them, more intense.

She was a weird kind of sad. She was feeling a weird kind of melancholy, Lucas simply sensed it. It was mostly like this, in this kind of situations. And most people in their life had none of these situations, and she had had already a whole lot.

His hand rested on her knee and left his pots and pans for what they were.

"Peyton." His other hand cupped the left cheek of her head that was hanging low. His thumb ran slow diagonal patterns on her cheekbone.

Timidly she looked up, meeting his eyes again. Peyton hated feeling so mentally vulnerable, she hated being weak in general. And it kept happening again and again and again.

Lucas started deeply into her amazing green eyes as he leaned his forehead against his. Their breaths mingled.

Lucas wished he had the right words now. But what could he say? How could they don't say anything? How could they change this subject? How could they just eat and go to sleep tonight?

Peyton softly leaned in and her boyfriend immediately knew what she wanted. He removed his hand from her knee and brought it up to cup her other cheek. Hesitantly, Peyton bridged the distance between their lips.

She was aware of the fact she made Lucas slightly uncomfortable with her bodily, needy behaviour in a situation like this. If circumstances got hard or sad or weird, she found his physical presence extremely comforting. Lucas had grown accustomed to it, but in his mind, it still wasn't right. It still felt like taking advantage of her in a very exposed state of being.

Luckily for Lucas, his pots and pats required his help. Swiftly and gently, he broke it off and gave her a last understanding look before returning to the preparation for their supper.

Automatically, Peyton hopped of the cupboard and opened another to take out plates, cutlery and two glasses. She placed them neatly on the table, by the time she had done, Lucas' dinner was ready.

They sat down in silence, enjoying Lucas' wonderful cooking. With every bite of rice with curry and tasty chicken, Peyton realised how lucky she was to have Lucas here. He was everything she ever dreamed of, caring, gentle, and loving, so many other characteristics that graced him. Of course he had his flaws, but she had so many more. She had first hand discovered how many flaws a person could have. Unhappily.

"It was delicious, Luke." Peyton's voice ended the silent dinner. She stood up and picked up her plate to bring it to the sink.

"We should start cleaning the house." She referred to their Friday routine. There was a glance in her eyes, for the slightest moment of a second ticking away from the clock. It was a glimpse of sadness, of the chaos inside a lost soul when she turned her face away from him.

In a beat, he was standing, following her, trapping her between his heroic body and the sink.

For a few seconds they just stood there, no words being spoken. Peyton felt empty, hollow so suddenly, so lost and incredible in need of the solidness of his body to keep her upright, as well mentally as bodily. Lucas' thoughts were about how he could keep her from falling into the empty chaos that was forming in the pit of her stomach and soon would consume all of her, at least if he didn't stop it, or attempt to delay it. He knew in the end, he couldn't save her from this. He couldn't crawl into her body and stop these sickening feelings that kept grasping her. But he could only try to protect her as long as possible. He was planning on doing that forever.

"Let's make dessert." He whispered against the sensitive skin of her ear shell, the breath hitting it, making her shiver lightly against him.

"But we have nothing in house to-" Her sentence was interrupted by his fingers caressing her tummy.

"Well, we have. And don't say you're not secretly hoping for some homemade cookie dough."

Peyton turned around in his embrace and her eyes were lively like a futurism painting.

"Like homemade Scott style?" Her eyes were like sparkling like the explosion of a skyrocket.

"Absolutely." Lucas brought his lips to mere centimetres from the one of his girlfriend.

Without thinking about it, Peyton leaned in closer to bridge the distance.

"We only have to bake them. My mom made the dough before I left."

Their lips connected for a soft peck.

Lucas let go of his girl and walked over to the bag beside the doorway where he had left the dough earlier before he had headed downstairs to meet his upset girlfriend.

As he bended down, the form of his buttocks were outlined in his shorts in a mouth-watering way.

The thoughts about cookie dough flew out the imaginary window and more delicious thoughts featuring the dough as a feature entered her mind.

Her hand slipped around his lean form and her hands sneaked into his shorts, cupping the firm globes of his ass, evoking a surprised yelp for her boyfriend.

"Peyton." He tried to upright himself, but she didn't give him a chance with her cheek pressed against his back.

Her hands moved forward and slid underneath his boxers to find his, for now, flaccid member.

Her fingers traced the length of it, making Lucas body tense up.

"Peyton." The second time his voice wasn't as much surprise as a wail from the deepest of his core.

"I have other ideas for the cookie dough." Her tone was as seducing like a forbidden fruit.

Her slender hand wrapped around his manhood and started to slowly caress it with long strokes. His head fell back to her shoulder. Damn that girl of his, she knew exactly what would turn him on.

Before either of them realised they were on the floor, pulling each others clothes off. Peyton's hands were eager to undress her boyfriend. That material covering his upper body, but mostly the material covering up his lower parts needed to come off, right now.

Her lips were as talented as her hands as both pairs ventured over his body. Soon his shirt was in heap on the ground and his bare chest was covered with the thick cookie dough.

Peyton's tongue was licking all over his collarbone before nibbling her way down to his happy trail. Softly she let a finger run over the thin hairs which led to her own private heaven.

A groan escaped her anticipating boyfriend but instead of doing what seemed to must logical and desired; she moved her lips back up to the spot aside his belly button.

Lucas wasn't given any time to feel disappointment when an incredible pressure built on his skin. Peyton was an expert in this, probably it helped she adored giving someone a hickey or receiving one. It was the ultimate act of possessiveness for her. Even through she'd rather mark him on his neck, for everyone to see. She knew that 'for everyone to see' was the problem. But the spot where her lips were sucking now was the second best one. She adored the contracting of his muscles underneath the surface of his skin.

Lucas was panting at the painful sensation of her teeth sinking in his tanned skin from time to time before they went to sucking again. But he was extremely okay with the hurt because after every bite of hurt, there was a wave of pleasure.

Lucas was so clouded with desire that his girlfriend's fingers tugging on his boxers felt like ice cubes sliding against his spine.

"Peyt-" But she didn't allow him to finish when she laid a finger on his lips to silence him.

Her hand was about to grab his hardness when Lucas got ahead of her by take hold of her wrist that was placed above his chest.

Immediately she stopped and stared at him, slightly confused.

"We shouldn't be doing this." His words came out harsher than he had intended, but it was only because otherwise a simple touch would overpower him.

On her face appeared a hurt expression, her eyes willowing and the corners of her lips pointing to her chin.

"But Luke-" This time he didn't let her finish.

"I don't want to take advantage of you." Looking her deeply into her hazel eyes.

"You are not taking advantage of me, damn it." She was getting frustrated. She loved her boyfriend for his intense desire to make everything perfect for others, but right now, she was strangely horny and he was on the floor with only his boxers on.

"Blondie, we both know we're going to end up having sex if we don't stop it from here. And I would feel very uncomfortable afterwards because you're so emotionally vulnerable right now."

Quickly, he sucked in a small amount of air to finish what he was saying before the blonde girl would interrupt him.

"For God's sake, you just found out you have a brother. Your mind must be going like a hurricane on this."

"Luke, I love you for thinking that, but right now, I bet I would benefit from some mental and physical relief so I can get my head clear."

Okay, that sounded pretty awkward.

Neither one of them was going to give in, there was only one resolution: compromise.

If she had been any other girl, Lucas would have given in into her request. It wasn't that he didn't want to make love to her. God no, if he could, he would do that non-stop. But she was so damn precious, just like china.

She was as beautiful and as fragile.

And yes, she was a fighter too, a warrior, a soldier for life. But that was outside, instinctual.

Inside, her soul was china. His china.

You could just break her inside while simply holding her, and outside, you wouldn't see a crack.

He knew that. Peyton was too stubborn to admit he knew and she didn't want to acknowledge the weakness in herself either.

"I'll help you to find your relief, okay?" He said while stroking her cheek. "As long as you aren't going to trick me in into the next level." His words were stern, but only vaguely.

Contently, he nuzzled his nose against the curve of her neck by the unspoken promise in her eyes. She would respect his evening's limit; he would give her what she wanted, though. This was their relationship; one where there wasn't particularly much space for selfishness.

"You want to go upstairs?" He said, his tongue running the form of her earlobe.

A shiver devoured her from head to toe. In her head she added the pros and the cons of her own bedroom. Teasingly Lucas' teeth nibbled at her sensitive earlobe, making every thought that might have been in her mind turning into invisible smoke.

"No. No. No." She said, stretching her neck to allow Lucas' better access. Her neediness caused Lucas to smile against her skin, his breathe tickling her.

Lucas' strong hand travelled from her neck over her firm breasts, over her covered tummy to slip into her black, tight shorts. There, close to his goal, his hand slipped under her cotton panties.

Peyton was mildly gasping by now. It was one of the most gorgeous sights to Lucas. He was close to ripping her tank top off so he could admire her chest moving up and down, but he knew he needed to take this slower to make her come. Instead he just shoved his free hand under her top to find out she wasn't wearing a bra.

The grunt that escaped him was nearly animalistic.

"Are you trying to kill me, Blondie?" He groaned out as he had to keep himself from any movements that could ruin this moment.

"Or are you trying to kill me?" Peyton moaned, slightly irritated by his lack of movements.

Soon they shared a smile and Lucas experimentally let a finger trace her folds before pushing it inside of her.

"God, Luke." She gasped as he tested how ready she was. And ready she was, she was almost soaking. Gently, he added another finger. He wasn't going to maker her beg tonight.

"Mmm."

"You're enjoying yourself?" He asked while letting his lips press a kiss against her temple.

"More." She demanded breathlessly.

Lucas assumed it was a 'yes'.

Little by little, he began to build up his pace while occasionally covering her neck or her chin or jaw with wet kisses.

She was moaning, the undertone of her non-stop groaning was frustration.

"Luke." She wailed. As earlier mentioned, he wouldn't make her beg; tonight he wouldn't enjoy her begging.

She stifled a near yell when his third finger slip inside her and his thumb stimulated her tiny bundle of nerves.

"Oh, God." Her back arched off the hard floor.

A slur of inaudible words escaped her mouth; Lucas smiled at how his girlfriend was enjoying his attention.

He had been stupid to deny her this. She needed this, hell, even he needed this, was the obvious message of his body.

Peyton desperately bit her lower lip to keep from moaning out loud, which only had to opposite effect on Lucas. He wanted to hear her moan aloud, he wanted to know he was doing a good job.

"Come on, Sawyer. You know I love to hear you moan out my name." To emphasis his point, he brushed his thumb over her clit not too lightly.

"Oh God, Luke." She groaned, making Lucas' chest swell with triumph. "Stop." Or maybe not.

"What? What's wrong?" He asked, instantly stopping his every moment.

"Nothing." The word got lost in a growl at the loss of his touch.

"Just." She rolled them over so she was on top of him.

"Check out my new material." She pulled her top over her head to reveal the endless skin of her tummy and breasts.

Lucas immediately spotted what she meant, the extra weight between her ribs and hips.

Eagerly, he let his hand ran over the skin, worshipping that she wasn't all flesh and bones anymore. His fingers traced the undersides of her breasts, watching her face that wore an expression of pure bliss. His big hands covered her chest; he just loved the feel of those fleshy globes underneath his hands.

Lucas noticed how Peyton bit her lip hard and her eyes were so intense. She was close, so fucking, incredibly close. Playful he pinched her nipples, and that had her flying over the edge hard.

"Luke." She shivered from head to toe in the intensity of her orgasm. Her hands gripped his upper arms of steel for support.

"That was simply amazing." She murmured while falling forward on his body. Her head rested in the crook of his neck and her ass shoved southward where it found a very interesting part of her boyfriend's anatomy on full alert.

"Oh ,baby." She whispered in his ear before biting on the shell teasingly. She manoeuvred herself so that she lay down beside him so she could face him. Most important thing, that she could 'thank him'.

Her gracious hand slipped underneath the waist band of his boxers to enclose his hard member.

"Thank you. Thank you." She whispered against the skin of his throat while her fingers tugged slightly on him.

"Peyton, you don't have to do this." And soon his big hand was found on top of her arm to stop her.

"Oh, baby boy, you know I love you for being like this." She said, making eye contact. "But I am not going to let you finish this on your own." She continued. "And miss out on all the fun." Her tone was serious as she pulled his boxer briefs down and exposed him to her eyes.

"I love you, Luke." Her hands began to move faster. "And I love touching you." Her rhythm was now steady and existing out of firm strokes, making his breathing pattern break.

"And do you know what I love ever more?" Her breath ghosted over his ear, her hands now playing with his balls. His body was quivering slightly; he was ready to blow up.

"When you come for me." Her teeth were buried in his over sensitive earlobe and her hands squeezed him just hard enough to push him over the edge.

Lucas came all over her hands and his own tummy with an unexpected force.

"Good boy." She kissed his lips chastely before getting up and rinsing a washcloth in the sink. In no time, she was back beside him to clean him up.

"We really need to clean up the house." Peyton said after a while as they lay together on the floor after their sexual adventure.

"We'll do it tomorrow." He answered while giving her a kiss on the top of her head. "Just not now."

Maybe it was selfish of him; maybe it was the best for her. And they would know the answer would show up soon.


End file.
